Doesn't have to be, but often is.
A fool understands nothing but suffering.
The wise awaken by seeking out Truth directly, for its own sake.

Ralston's awakening came from intense self-inquiry retreats where me contemplated "Who am I?" for 3 weeks non-stop.
And Ralston is a freak of nature. None of you here have his contemplation or focus abilities.
If you only knew how much work Ralston has done, your jaw would drop.
He's done over 10,000 hours of retreats.

@ivankiss I honestly think what you need is #1. You're way too insecure for #2.
You have that boundary, so you should communicate it to her properly. There is no need to deny that you have this boundary if you have it.
And if she said she has a history of cheating, then she actually needs you to set that boundary for her. She might even be thankful. Don't expect a girl to take charge on such matters. You are the man, you set the rules. Lead her. It will be easier for her if you are strict. Teacher her how to block flirting. Don't expect her to figure it out.

Here are two ways to handle:
1) Sit her down and tell her this: If I am dating a girl, I am not okay with her flirting with other guys. So if a guy comes up to you and starts to flirt with you, you need to shut him down within the first 30 seconds. You tell him, "Sorry, but I have a boyfriend." If I see that you are flirting with guys beyond this, we are breaking up. This is what I require from my girlfriend. If you are not comfortable with this then no hard feelings but we are not going to work out. So take some time to think about it and let me know your decision. I will be okay with whatever decision you make. I have no desire to control you, but if you are want to be my girlfriend then I expect it to be exclusive.
2) Just stop caring. Surrender your desire to control her. Let her do whatever she wants and you work on being a stronger man who isn't needy but detached. This should make her even more attracted to you.

Just cause you love a girl does not mean you gotta have her in your house every day. This is not healthy.
I love ice cream but I don't eat it every morning. And if I did I would get sick of it.
If you like a girl, create space for the chemistry to recharge. It's like you're draining a battery and never giving it time to recharge.
Not to mention that as a man you got other things to be doing than babysitting your girl. You need space to work on your life purpose and she should have something she's working on too, not just middling around your house.
Obviously do whatever you want, but I would urge you to think about how you might be shooting yourself in the foot by unconsciously following the "normal" path without thinking it through. Why do you need a girl living in your house? Think about it. Is that really wise?

Tell her to move out.
Don't allow distractions like that. Your space is divine and should not be given up for any girl.
Living together is only gonna make you two hate each other soon.
If you love a girl, the best way to ruin it is to see her too often. And everyday is the worst.

Girls can have very different personalities. Some are chill and relaxed, others are neurotic, needy, and even batshit crazy.
It's really up to you to lead the relationship and set it up as you like. You can see her often or rarely. Just depends. 1 to 2 times a week is a good starting point. If you have sex every day it gets old real fast. Once a week would keep things exciting.

99.9% of women I would not touch with a ten foot pole.
God isn't a fool

This is bad advice.
Do not expect God to just give you things which you can work to create for yourself.
God is not going to change your flat tire for you.
And God is not just going to give a lame ass man a quality woman.

I don't really actively talk about it unless they ask me, which they rarely do.
My Mom is pretty tolerant of me doing whatever, even though she basically thinks I'm crazy.
My brother is pretty open to it because his wife is pretty heavy into spirituality and he's had some mystical experiences on psychedelics. But mostly he's stuck in stage Orange materialism and scientism. He's open to it in theory, but not motivated to do any actual practices. Recently I introduced him to the Spiral Dynamics model and he found is interesting from a sort of scientific and historical POV.
My Dad I don't communicate with at all for others reasons.
My ex-girlfriend was a bit into it but the metaphysical stuff was just way over her head. Although she loved the psychedelics.
It doesn't really matter. Just do your spiritual work and mostly keep it to yourself or some close friends who are also into it. Definitely do NOT expect your family to be into it or to understand it or to support you in your spiritual journey. Your family wants you to be the old you. They don't want you to be enlightened because it would freak them the fuck out. They cannot handle the mindfuck of you becoming immortal. It is just totally outside their reality. They want to feel like The Matrix is real.
A great way to scratch the itch of sharing is to find a girlfriend or boyfriend who's also into self-actualizing and spirituality. Then you can go real deep with it together. That will be a wild fun ride. But it requires the right person, not just some rando.
There is no cure for closedmindedness. Other than to open one's mind.

I do dates in outdoor shopping mall areas with lots of shops and activities.
Never stay in one place longer than 1 hour.
Most of my dates are walking around outside.

Nightclubs are really bad places for dates. Don't agree to that kind of date. Invite her elsewhere.
For the love of God, do not entertain any girl for 4 hours in a nightclub. This is insane. Worse case scenario you meet her in the club, dance around for 30 mins, and then bounce out.

It's all about how you set the frame. You want to set the frame that you are a highly social and extroverted guy who frequently goes out and has a lively social life. Don't frame it as: "I go out to hunt for girls", frame it as, "I'm an attractive social guy with many friends, both guy and girl friends and I'm out every weekend. Join me if you wish or miss out on the fun."
Don't make it all about sex. Just become a social guy who likes to have fun socializing with guys and girls, without even thinking too much about sex or dating. And then if some girl decides she wants to date you or sleep with you, it just happens and it's no big deal. Take all the seriousness and expectations out of it.

Yep. This works. Been doing this for the past 2 months and my life is unrecognizable compared to what it was not too long ago, in the best possible way, and it's only getting better. For the first few weeks, every Friday was rough but Saturday I would be in the swing of things. Didn't move to a big city but it's a pretty decent college town. All the bars close at 2 except one and that's where everyone goes at 2 and it's almost impossible not to meet cool new people there at that time especially. Might be moving out to a bigger city in Texas soon with my female cousin who is extremely beautiful and has a lot of connections, living together (yeah it's a little weird but we both have it going on with the dating shit, or at least I assume she does too, and we are first cousins who respect each other as friends and family members).
I used to be really intimidated by approaching girls in groups, but now any time I see a group of girls where each one is "YES/10" I'm practically unable NOT to approach because I've gotten such good results by just saying "hey you" to the hottest one like I know them already, and if she or any of the other girls respond well soon after, I put my hand on the small of her back (the most interested one), flirt, get the number, and set the date. A lot of the time they'll say "we're lesbians" but if I just ignore that (or give them the noncompliance face; Mystery's "disallowing-frame face") or say to them "why you being weird?" they quickly drop the act and start saying shit like "Are you for real? (Rubbing my chest) Wow you are SO handsome!" (I'm very fit because I started doing more serious lifting 2 months ago and I'm getting strong fast because I've been strong before, and so there's muscle memory there, making for quick gains, it seems.) (You need to be careful if you're good looking and going out solo though -- pretty sure I've almost been kidnapped on at least one or two occasions! )
I'm a natural introvert, and a couple nights ago I led a ~30min discussion on the street on camera... like, holding the microphone and everything... about relationships and sex positions with a bunch of hot girls, and got a bunch of numbers, and hit a dab pen very hard that one of the girls handed me mid-conversation and just continued -- they were blown away by how much shit I knew; when you learn game you have a lot to offer in the way of relationship advice... so then they started looking to me to lead the discussion! That was fucking WAY outside my comfort zone -- 2 months ago, that would have been utterly unthinkable... I might even start playing guitar in public and/or sing in a band next. I'm just pushing it in some way, every day.
Sometimes I cry because of just how happy I am now -- it's kind of like "what the hell just happened..." And shit's just barely getting started.
In fact that's why I haven't been posting much here lately.

38 is not that old. You still have so much time to build a great life.
When you're 60 you will realize how foolish you were for thinking 38 was too old.
I understand exactly what you mean, but the deeper truth is that what you really want is to love yourself. You want to discover the fundamental Love at the core of your own being.
The worst part with identify yourself in Incels is not that women don't love you, it's that you don't love yourself -- and THAT is why women tend to not love you. Women LOVE men who LOVE themselves!
You're an uncut diamond.
Nobody is ever bad.
Only Good exists.
Your opportunity here is not just to get laid or to get a girl to love you. Your opportunity here is to realize the infinite well of Love that resides within your own spirit. Begin the spiritual work to truly heal yourself. It's doable, you're not too late for that, it requires no money and it requires no car. As you make yourself whole you will attract quality people into your life with little effort. But you will also not need them.

That’s perfect. See if you can get invited into the VIP section or DJ booth. That’s usually where the most high status guys and attractive women are.
Sartain is the real deal. For better or worse, he’s taken game to a level 99.9% of guys never will. And he’s done it without being a celebrity or compromising ethics too hard. It’s impressive.
Sartain will not teach you pure cold approach though. He focuses almost exclusively on status and social circle building. So he’s a good source if you’re into that.

By going out and learning to socialize with girls.
With that girl, no.
With other girls, of course.
- - - - -
See, the problem in this example is that you wanted something for nothing. You expected a threesome for zero work. In real life if you want a threesome you will have to work your ass off for it. I have friends who do threesomes. They hustle for it. While you are at home on your PC, they are out there socializing. One guy I know here in Vegas had a threesome with two virgins.

Your "high quality" girl still wants fun, emotions, value, and leadership. A high quality girl has options. She won't be attracted to some needy inexperienced ass.
For a guy to get a good relationship requires hundreds of approaches.
You are assuming attraction. But that cannot be assumed.
A guy needs a lot of "customers" to get the experience necessary to be the kind of strong man & leader a high quality girl expects him to be.
Every girl wants the sausage but doesn't want to know how it's made. As it turns out, being a man tends to be a dirty business.

I'm sure some girls can pull that off, but I wouldn't count on it.
Again, she is not having sex for logical reasons. She is not sitting there calculating which guy is most suitable for her long-term health and well-being.
If your strategy is to get into a girl's pants using logical objective facts about yourself, you're going to be extremely disappointed with your results.

The problem here is, if you set the boyfriend frame she is likely to not get attracted to you and therefore you will lose your "high-quality" woman to a scummy player who doesn't give a shit about her. And yes, she will sleep with him instead of you because he is detached and fun while you are needy and serious.
If you see an awesome girl, the more you lead with the BF frame the more she will get repelled.

@Raptorsin7 For most guys anything higher than 30 is considered a high body count as the average guy sleeps with about 7-15 girls their lifetime. For girls I would say anything higher than 20.
I remember talking to some of my female friends about this and they would explain to me after a bad break up they would go on a dating spree and fuck the hottest guys they could match with to "regain their confidence"
One girl I met from TInder told me she went through a nasty break up and I was her 11 guy she slept with in the past month, that blew my mind.

I'd say 20+, for either gender. I don't buy into the red pill laced talking point and attitude that women "should" have a lower lay count than men. It just comes from insecurity from thousands of years of subconscious patriarchy eroding 
Also have to keep in mind this is a self improvement forum, with some dysfunctional people, and PUA's who will distort perceptions of what is normal or "healthy".
Of all the "normies" I've met in my life (99.9999% of people not doing self-help), I would discern most of them have never had more than 5-15ish sexual partners. Which seems like a pretty reasonable and healthy number of people to engage with in that way.

The simple rule is this: Until she sleeps with you, you are allowed to flirt/date other girls. There is no exclusivity until at least after sex.
You should keep talking to girls until one of them sleeps with you and wants exclusivity. Until such time you are a free man and you talk and flirt with anyone you want. Do not sit around waiting for a girl, thinking she is your girlfriend. She's not your girlfriend yet.
Obviously you do not explicate any of this to her. You just go about your life and don't tell her anything.

Reality is a Mind that dreams/imagines. When you say something is "real", what you mean is, it's imagined by you so deeply that you are not even aware of how it is imagined. And so you call that "real". Whereas if you become aware of how something is imagined, you call it unreal.
You have to realize that this is all a trick of the mind. There is no ground for the distinction between real and imaginary. Because at root all there is, is Mind.
The key is to drop the idea that there exists anything outside of imagination, by noticing that everything is Mind.
How do you know? Consciousness. The only way anything is known. The only solution here is more consciousness, and no other way will work.

Jerk off and talk way more girls.
Don't kid yourself. Even if you get a gf you will not get by in life without jerking off.