Wisebaxter

Member
 View profile  See their activity

  • Content count

    1,181

  • Joined

  • Last visited

Posts posted by Wisebaxter

  1. Posted · Edited by Wisebaxter

    @Buck Edwards

    25 minutes ago, Buck Edwards said:

    If a girl twerks in an alleyway, that's bad news. 

    🤣😂 I know, right? It was the most surreal experience. As we were walking along she kept saying ‘do you like my ass?’ Man I feel sorry for her. She’s gone in the head. The saddest thing was that she couldn’t see how unhealthy it all was. Somehow she had this mentality that she was enjoying being a play thing for men. She straight away felt the need to get my validation. She’d made up some spiritual cock and bull story about deities to justify having no restraint, saying that the more restrains you have, the more attached to ego you are, you just have to flow like consciousness does and live life through the sense. It’s a nice idea at least. I just wanted to say ‘some fraudster has made you obsessed with Kali and you just need to wake the fuck up. You’re not sucking dudes off because you’re doing the work of the earth goddess, you’re just using that as a romantic notion to justify it. But what do I know? I could be wrong. God clearly likes to dress up as a Romanian sex addict with spiritual pretensions. Can’t argue with that. 

    I feel slightly on edge now. She lives in my building. I won’t have seen the last of her I’m sure 

  3. Posted · Edited by Wisebaxter

    I asked a random girl outside my uni halls today if she knew a weed dealer and she got extremely friendly fast, saying she'd seen me around and stoner's should stick together, we should hang out etc. I'm 45, she's 25, very attractive, petite, perfect body, half Romanian, half, Greek. Lip filler. The sort of woman I never have any reason to talk to. After meeting her dealer with her in a graveyard, she carried on talking about how we were gonna be friends, inviting me out on her birthday. She also said she likes to tease men, telling me I was hot and that she 'does' older guys. I'm serious! I had an intuition that she's used to doing this though and I wasn't overtly attracted to her as she just seemed a bit unhinged. She said 'do you like my ass?' and started twerking for me in an alleyway. All the while she's saying she's falling for this guy she's banging called 'Tim,' whom we met earlier, a chubby guy with a beard and big dick (apparently) that seemed very pleasant. I told her I can twerk too and she checked out my ass as I did so, resting her hand on it. But still, I knew what I was dealing with. So that sets the scene. At the end, please tell me, is she an enlightened master or...does she require many years of therapy. 

    We go to her room for her to roll a joint. It's really bad in there. Stuff thrown everywhere, carpet covered in crap. The sink was brown and dirty, full of brown water with a plunger stuck in it. She said it's been blocked for ages but she hasn't told maintenance. She can't tell me why exactly. Make what you will of this. She's studying philosophy. So we're laughing together and having fun, I'm making her feel good and celebrating who she is, as I felt she needed it. She tells me she's also an escort and she loves it because she's a 'nasty' bitch. I said 'what does that mean?' She said it means she just loves sex. She says she can make a couple of grand from a trip up to London, that 'the guys are so rich and hot too.' She shows me an Indonesian guy sitting on an expensive looking porch. She then shows me how flexible she is and puts her foot over her head. I was enjoying her company and so swept a long with it all I hadn't had time to reflect on how bizarre it all was.

    We go to the park and start smoking a joint together. I quite like her. She's very herself and seems very energetic, lively and happy. I pay her lots of compliments and she hugs me. I start to appreciate how hot she is. Exotic, with stunning eyes, looks like something from assassins creed, like an Egyptian Goddess. I sang an Ancient Greek Hymn called ‘Song to the Muse’ the night before, that I’m working on for a uni project. I briefly wonder if I summoned her somehow.
    She approaches a guy lying on a park bench who looks homeless for a lighter but stays and speaks to him for about 7 minutes whilst I wait on the bench. She comes back and tells me he's really hot and has nice eyes, as I watch him start juggling skittles. I know, just one of those days. It gets a lot weirder.
    She keeps telling me we're kindred spirits. I toy with the idea of being friends with her as she's so beautiful to look at and I like her authenticity and the fact she doesn't hide anything about herself is refreshing. She's very smitten with Tim. She says he might want her to live with him next year but isn't sure. She can't say why, but thinks it might be because he thinks she wants more. She then starts talking about the local rich guys she hooks up with and shows me a picture of some preppy looking guy on a balcony, who looks very upper class. She says 'I sucked his dick yesterday. He's gonna pay for my boob job.’ I don't know what to think now. I'm just rolling with it as best I can. I ask 'does he know he is?' She gets a bit triggered and says 'Oh he knows, he knows if he wants to fuck me all the time he'll have to! I ask for her views on Andrew Tate as she almost reminded me of one of the girls you see in his videos. I'm just trying to fit her into some kind of context I can make sense of. She tells me he fucked with the wrong women as Romanian women aren't stupid. He thought they were, treated them badly and now he's paying for it. She was speaking as if she was one of those women and started showing me Romanian supermodels. She seemed to be glamourising her lifestyle. She told me she spends hundreds of pounds on clothes and you could tell by looking her, she was dressed very well and looked great. But I kept thinking about that plunger in the sink. 

    She takes my number and we both walk back to our rooms. She phones 10 minutes later and invites me to the uni canteen for food. She's wearing a revealing top where you can see the sides of her tits. At this stage I'm wondering if I can fuck her and I'm also a little swept away by her beauty and still finding her quite interesting. I never meet women like this.  We grab some shitty fish and chips and she leads back to her dirty room. On the way she hints she had a bad upbringing and some bad issues with her dad. I sit on her dirty chair and try to eat gracefully out of a styrofoam food carton with a wooden knife and fork. She keeps talking about Tim. 'Do you think he's into me?' I'm thinking, 'how the fuck do I know?' I suggest she talks to him but she says he can't. She can't really say why, but is acting like she's in love. Now she tells me he comes over at least once a week and eats her pussy, for about four hours. Four hours!? That can't be true. Who is this legend they call Tim? 

    Then she gets really intense, talking about how she's a gemini and they have a dark side. Whilst picking up pieces of grime off the floor she tells me Kali speaks to her on a regular basis and then throws me a heavy book on witchcraft. Now she's staring at me with this intense gaze as she opens the book and shows me Kali surrounded by severed heads and covered with blood. I mention Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom but she stares at me blankly. She says Kali is the ultimate power and cannot be dominated by men. She was told by a Romanian Gypsy that she should study Kali and Kali guides her all the time. She started to imply her carefree hedonistic lifestyle is somehow in line with the energy of Kali, who wants her to become a leader and end the suffering of humanity. I'm wondering where the sucking off rich guys for implants falls into that, but I'm trying to stay open. At a couple of points I'm almost entranced, quite high, listening to her talk about Kali in her Romanian accent. She loos like some temptress or an Egyptian deity perhaps.  We have an interesting talk about Non Duality and she of course sees herself as a spiritual empath. When I confide about my recent break up she again just stares at me blankly until I feel self conscious and just wrap up the story quickly, getting back to talking about her. She says 'wanna see my tits?' Somehow I knew this was coming. Sounding like some bumbling Englishman in a Hugh Grant film I say 'well, yes, of course, if you'd like to show me.' It didn't seem like a come on to me. I don't know what it was. Perhaps because we'd been talking about how hot she is and she was wanting more compliments. She says 'they're a bit saggy,' and they were, but still attractive. She tells me Tim wants his friends to fuck her if she moves in there. She says she's up for that. Now I just want out of there. I tell her I'm gonna go chill and I'm off. 

    I get a text from her five minutes later asking if I have a spare iPhone charger. I text her back to say I'm really not looking for a friend but I'll see her around.
     

    What a wild ride! Was she somehow, by giving into her passions and living through the senses, embodying an aspect of the divine? She seemed totally ungrounded, obsessed with the superiority of her intuition over common sense. I don't think I've ever mer a girl that hot and that fucked up. She was sweet too, very warm. But towards the end she said ‘I wonder what Tim thinks about us together.’ I saw that coming too. She wants to use me as tool. Me and my iPhone charger. At least I got some weed! 
     

    She calls me ten minutes later and I reiterate that I’m not looking for a friend and I’m a private person. To be honest I can see this chick is fucking bananas and would be too much. She asks ‘do you fancy me?’ I say ‘yeah sure you’re hot, why do you ask?’ She says as that would make more sense as to why you don’t want to hang out.’ Seeing an opportunity to make it easier for her I say ‘yeah yeah, sure, that’s it, you’re waaaay too hot, soo, you’d become my Tim.’ She giggles. She asks ‘did you think about me being your girlfriend?’ I concede that I did have a brief moment when I entertained the idea but quickly snapped out of it. I can see she likes men fawning over her. She says ‘well, I would be up for stuff with you…we could hang out some more, it’s quite likely. Let’s go to the park.’ I can sense that sex really means nothing to her, so much so that she’ll use it to get something as simple as friendship, or the offer of it at least. I say ‘you’re just a bit lonely and you want a friend, you don’t really wanna have sex that much right?’ She says ‘err, yeah that’s it.’ I say that she can call me if Tims ever busy and she needs a pussy eating stand in. She laughs, says ok then hangs up 

    if she calls me to eat her pussy I still don’t think I’ll do it. It doesn’t feel right some how, like I’d be taking advantage of a mentally unhinged person. 

  4. Posted

    I am so blessed to have this insatiable drive for success and personal growth. I could have easily given up by now, but I've persevered, day in, day out, always learning, always evolving. I must be truly favoured. How lucky I am, to even have this opportunity. Just to think, soon I'll have an MA. Master...of....the Arts. The word Master will be in my title. All for you Bruce Leeroy. I've been guided from such a young age. I trust. I have faith. No matter what happens, this is the path I should be on. Such willpower. Such force. Let it be known, whoever may read this. I did it. I am a success. Alex Lambden came into this world and said 'I will aim for the stars.' He dared to dream, he sacrificed, he said 'I will not settle for second best. He even risked his life for it, to say, this is not enough, I am not enough. I can be more, I can be great.' Driven by love and a lust for life, to experience it all, to have it all or to have nothing,

  5. Posted · Edited by Wisebaxter

    Today the sun was shining for the first time in a while. I felt elated and emotional as I walked to the seafront listening to uplifting Synthwave. I decided to let my body rest and not take any Modafinil or LSD. I feel good. Reading about how to conduct social research is bringing me lots of joy. What an interesting subject. And I have a whole two weeks to work on this! My paper is going to be so fascinating. I have a feeling I might get a Merit.

    The sun glistens on the ocean, offering a promise of even greater abundance and joy. What a blessing. I feel so grateful to be here on this day, experiencing all this beauty. Thank you universe for allowing me to be here. Life is such a gift. I am filled with vitality and love. This moment is perfection. It's all I need. 

  6. Posted · Edited by Wisebaxter

    This is my second journal. This time around I'm going to be more positive and use it to encourage myself. I'll start my thanking myself for making this decision. I'm excited. I've been having a wonderful time learning to compose music and I've met some beautiful people. I can't wait to see where this journey takes me. I've learned so much already and it's incredible how far I've come. I've made so much awesome music and I'm so proud of myself for trying hard and following my passion. Whenever I make music now I'm always amazed at how good it is. Just to think, all those years growing up I love soundtracks so much and never thought that one day I'd be making my own. life unfolds in mysterious and profound ways. I've always felt like I'm being guided. 

    With perseverance, comes success - Bob Matthews, Research methods: a practical guide for the social sciences

    I am manifesting:

    1. Financial independence as a composer. For me, financial independence means -

    • Not having to rely on anyone but myself to meet my basic needs of food and shelter. 
    • Not having a boss, other than the commissioner of my work. 
    • Not having a traditional working day, being able to choose my own hours 
    • Being in the process of paying back all by debts 

    2. A healthy, stress-free lifestyle where I make good decisions that benefit my body and mind

    3. Freedom. To me, freedom means:

    • Being able to have the things I want, with no money worries 
    • Travelling wherever I choose, whenever I choose
    • Being able to make decisions that benefit me without having to consider money 

    4. Safety. To me, safety means:

    • Not having to worry about people in my living space
    • Being able to really relax at home in peace
    • Cooking whatever I want, whenever I want. 
    • A home that feels like home 

    5. Health. Energy. Vitality. Balance. 

    This is a good list. I am pleased with it. These are the things that will give me safety, security and peace of mind. I will not ask for more. I will be grateful for what I have and consider anything on this list as a precious gift. 

     

  7. Posted · Edited by Wisebaxter

    6 hours ago, Yimpa said:

    Bumble BFF. We started off as friends and it led to something more.

    Don’t use the BFF feature sneakily, though. Most on there are not interested in being more than friends. But on rare occasions it can lead to something more, organically.

    @Yimpa Oh I’ve never thought to try the BFF thing on Bumble. That’s a good idea because it takes all the pressure off and really anything good will be built from the ground up with someone you can actually be friends with. I’m really happy for you. That’s where the good ones are hanging out then. I’ll sign back up soon and have a look. Would be good for me to stop being motivated by just sex. I almost can’t divorce it from how I feel about a woman based on who she is a person. A recipe for disaster and there have been some. 

    In terms of being sneaky, yeah you’d have to be authentically interested in just being friends. But does that mean you’d start friendships even with women you don’t find attractive at all? Surely that always comes into play? Or no?

  10. Posted · Edited by Wisebaxter

    @Carl-Richard  Ah so she was a semi, into games but not weed. That's like buying a current bun with no icing on top.
    Some of these nerdy gaming girls you see at conventions are stupidly hot. If you were a more conventional looking guy in that environment and not a skinny, awkward nerd, you might be able to shine more and get them interested, especially if you could impress her on Fortnite or something, win a match with her watching. At the moment you'd feel a hand on your groin.

    It would probably have to be a big gaming convention as I'd imagine that super hot girls aren't exactly the norm there, but at least they'd be interesting and really for me they wouldn't need to be massively hot, just mildly, perhaps in a quirky manner. I bet they'd be massively into films too, especially martial arts. That's another thing girls don't seem to enjoy in general. My ex used raise her eyebrows every time I put Bloodsport on. She'd just sit and wince every time someone got elbowed in the face. 

  11. Posted · Edited by Wisebaxter

    @Carl-Richard Oh I hope he's ok, break ups are awful. I'd imagine that creating a stoner chick is never the same unless she really develops that true passion for it. I've had a couple of girls who'll try it to make me happy but watching them try and use a controller just makes me despair and yearn for a girl who can wield it like a pro and actually play games on hardcore difficulty. I've never seen a girl actually play a game well so that would really do it for me. I'm imagining her telling me to keep loading the bong for her so she doesn't lose momentum 

     

     

    _b765f469-4b04-497b-8cc2-997ae5fabf4d.jpeg

  13. Posted · Edited by Wisebaxter

    16 hours ago, Emerald said:

    I was about to make this same comment. 

    The vagina (which specifically refers to the internal canal) is a self-cleaning organ.

    And if you try to put anything inside to clean it then you'll mess up all the vaginal flora and end up with all sorts of yeast infections and other problems.

    And the vulva (the external lady parts) is best to clean with either just water or some kind of gentle soap and water.

    @Emerald God knows why I even said that. I can't even remember writing it but I think I was trying to be humorous, although it just came off as weird reading it back. I think I was trying to allude to the stereotype of gamers not washing much. That's interesting anyway about vaginas being self cleaning though. Based on your description I was referring to the vulva more, so my use of terminology was sloppy. 

  16. Posted

    @BojackHorseman

    1 hour ago, BojackHorseman said:


    Yeah in the end I can still carry on not knowing why I want women to humiliate me in various weird, extreme ways, but I still find it interesting to understand why. I think there's some truth in sexual preferences having some kind of explanations, and since I'm  also fucked up in other ways, I thought understanding myself through this could maybe reveal things I don't know about.
    But if it's very very early childhood, I'll have trouble remembering that, I have so few memories from my childhood.

    Trying to understand their genesis sounds like a worthwhile endeavour. Ultimately a therapist would be able to help, surely? Also I'm wondering what chat GPT would throw up. Let's have a look: 

    ChatGPT

    "It's important to recognize that human sexuality is complex and multifaceted, and there isn't always a single, clear-cut explanation for why someone develops particular sexual preferences or kinks. While some people may be able to trace aspects of their sexuality back to specific experiences or relationships in their past, for many others, the reasons may be more elusive or multifactorial.

    It's also worth noting that sexual preferences and kinks can be influenced by a wide range of factors, including biology, culture, personal experiences, and individual psychology. While some individuals may find that certain experiences or relationships from their past contribute to their sexual preferences, others may not find any direct correlation.

    In terms of the relationship between sexual preferences and broader aspects of one's life, it's possible that there may be some connections or overlaps, but again, these relationships can be complex and highly individualized. For some people, aspects of their sexuality may play a role in shaping their identity or relationships, while for others, their sexuality may be more compartmentalized from other areas of their life.

    Regarding your experience of enjoying both feminine traits and femdom, it's not uncommon for individuals to have diverse or seemingly contradictory sexual interests. Human sexuality is incredibly diverse, and there's no one "right" way to experience it. Many people find that their sexual preferences evolve and change over time, and it's perfectly normal to have a range of interests and desires.

    If you're struggling to remember significant aspects of your childhood or parents, it may be helpful to explore this further with a therapist or counselor who can provide support and guidance. While childhood experiences can certainly influence aspects of our adult lives, it's also important to remember that our identities and experiences are constantly evolving, and it's never too late to explore and understand ourselves better"


     

  17. Posted · Edited by Wisebaxter

    @BojackHorseman good question, I have kinks related to buttholes and toilet stuff :D The interesting thing is they were with me very early on, before I had any actual experiences. I remember trying to sniff my cat's butt when I was very very young and I had a dream that Teela from he-man peed on my face. What I'm saying is, I think they've always been with me. I was born with them. I like what @Yimpasaid about being shamless. It's very hard for though as my kink is so out there. Anyway my point was that you may have been born with your kinks and there's no psychological reason as such 

    Her lack of leg-wear was essential for manoeuvrability 

    mqdefault.jpg

  18. Posted · Edited by Wisebaxter

    I was making an image showing an orchestrator working with players and it seems that AI has no conception of people's personal boundaries :D although saying that, she does look uncomfortable. Maybe he thinks he has personal space 'chad' allowances. Also, look at the length of his finger. This dude has had finger extensions to give himself a competitive advantage with women

    OIG2 (1).jpeg

  19. Posted · Edited by Wisebaxter

    @Yimpa As the old adage goes, ask a man about something he's passionate about and he'll talk your ear off, you've found my sweet spot friend. Here then is a video I've made for you on the topic, to honour your curiosity. 
     

    If you would like the short version and don't have time for such things - you can use certain VR apps as power tools to create environments for strategic thinking and conceptualising. In the video I show you Noda and Horizon Workspaces. Noda is basically mind mapping in VR and it's the 'shit.' You will be Tom Cruise in Minority Report. Watch the video though G 

  22. Posted

    On 28/01/2024 at 0:08 AM, Rafael Thundercat said:

    Create an image to represent the tendency of speaking mindlessly involves capturing the essence of thoughtless or unfiltered speech. Here's a description of an image that could convey this concept: Imagine a silhouette profile of a person's head, filled with a chaotic swirl of colorful speech bubbles of varying sizes and shapes. These speech bubbles represent thoughts and words pouring out of the person's mind without control or consideration. The colors could be vibrant and diverse to symbolize the range of topics and ideas being spoken mindlessly. The person's mouth could be wide open, spewing out these speech bubbles uncontrollably. In this image, the disorganized and colorful speech bubbles juxtaposed against the silhouette of the person's head would symbolize the tendency to speak without careful thought or mindfulness, reflecting the concept of speaking mindlessly.

     

    DALL·E 2024-01-28 00.06.39 - A silhouette profile of a person's head, filled with chaotic, colorful speech bubbles of various sizes and shapes, representing unfiltered thoughts an.png

    @Rafael Thundercat Amazing how an image can solidify a concept in your head so much more. Could be a good personal development tool that serves as a visual aid or a cue to cultivate something else, or more preferable etc

  25. Posted

    On 13/01/2024 at 5:07 PM, meta_male said:

    @Wisebaxter I'd make it a personal thing you do for yourself, as in me time and focus on spending quality time with women and people in general if you care about conscious relationships. This will get you out there more.

    @meta_maleThanks buddy, I appreciate you taking the time to give me that advice. I need to do a Joe Dispenza special and change who I am somehow, rewire myself to enjoy socialising. Quality time with women and people in general. Yeah I like the sound of that. My relationships have been shit because they haven't been formed on any foundation. I've also be focused mainly focused on sex and just too driven by that aspect of things and not on who that person actually is. I was just trying to get laid and happened to get stuck with them as it's easy to form a quick connection with sex and fool yourself. It would be nice to just put all of that to one side and form some deeper connections based on more. I bet the love I could experience would be so much more profound.