Barna

Enthusiasm. I needed a decade to realize this

19 posts in this topic

When I got a bit deeper into spirituality, I learned that my feelings don't need to be defined by the events that were happening around me. This was very liberating so I strated to detach my emotions more and more from the external world, while I regularly went deeper and deeper into myself with psychedelics and meditation. I got a bit lazy about progressing towards my external goals but I didn't mind because I was happier than before.

What I didn't see back then is that I had started lose my enthusiasm towards life. Nothing, other than consciousness, was worthy of my enthusiasm. This gave me a focus on what's really important, but it also made me indifferent towards everything else. 

Though the main problem was that I've lost my energy. I lived day-by-day with no motivation towards anything, and still having to work, still having to do the chores. After a while even maintaining friendships felt like a chore. I just felt tired all the time. 

Now when I try to be really enthusiastic towards anything, it feels like it goes completely against my whole personality. And that's how I know that I've identified my shadow. 

But I want to heal it and I want to find a way back to enthusiasm. I already feel how much energy and motivation it can give me. So I will become enthusiastic again. But this time the enthusiasm is gonna be unconditional. 

Love you all ♥️

Edited by Barna

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Perhaps focus more on relaxing a bit more:-)

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2 hours ago, Waken said:

Perhaps focus more on relaxing a bit more:-)

I can't do that when I'm single. Every day I have to develop myself through work, sports, and learning, otherwise I feel like I don't deserve a woman with high standards. But I aim to get a solid 8 hours of sleep every night, that's my relaxation time. 

While writing this down, I just realized that I sound like one of those "grind bros" on LinkedIn... :D 

But I do mini-breaks. Like, I just discovered the Almost Friday TV channel, this is fuckin' GOLD

Edited by Barna

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15 hours ago, Barna said:

I can't do that when I'm single. Every day I have to develop myself through work, sports, and learning, otherwise I feel like I don't deserve a woman with high standards. But I aim to get a solid 8 hours of sleep every night, that's my relaxation time. 

You need to lower your standards, and see beauty with 10000000% clarity. 

Paradox. 


"Wrongness is the unsung hero of growth, for it is only by venturing into the unknown and risking error that we can expand the boundaries of our understanding and pave the way for groundbreaking insights and innovations." -Claude 3 Opus

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Listen to more comedy and laugh more and you will find your enthusiasm. Or listen to happy gurus like Sadhguru.

Edited by hyruga

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21 hours ago, Barna said:

Though the main problem was that I've lost my energy. I lived day-by-day with no motivation towards anything, and still having to work, still having to do the chores. After a while even maintaining friendships felt like a chore. I just felt tired all the time. 

Having the right, positive attitude towards your duties or chores and enjoying them is also part of meditation and such work helps to build a higher states of consciousness. Similarly is work towards attaining your goals.

If you are feeling tired it means you don't enjoy what you are doing or have not crafted the right attitude within yourself. 

You never wear down in anything as long as you enjoy doing it. Enjoying your duties or work by calibrating your attitude and mindset is also a part of meditation, and part of Karma yoga ( yoga of action).

(Janaka is considered to be an ancient king who had attained enlightenment through karma yoga and he is mentioned in the religious scriptures of Vedas, Bhagavad Gita and Ashtavakra Gita. )

Yes, it is important to hack away the inessential stuff, but it is also important to perform the chores or duties that satisfy your professional and personal needs. And the performance of such duties can also be made meditative by doing them in awareness and cultivated enjoyment of work.

Edited by Ajay0

Self-awareness is yoga. - Nisargadatta

Awareness is the great non-conceptual perfection. - Dzogchen

Evil is an extreme manifestation of human unconsciousness. - Eckhart Tole

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@Barna if you dont already have one, maybe think about adopting a dog/pet.

Me and my dog Bailey motivate each other.

Just an idea! ♥ 


“Everything is honoured, but nothing matters.” — Eckhart Tolle.

"I have lived on the lip of insanity, wanting to know reasons, knocking on a door. It opens. I've been knocking from the inside." -- Rumi

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Just pursue what you love most in life.


You are God. You are Truth. You are Love. You are Infinity.

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On 7/3/2023 at 4:18 AM, hyruga said:

Listen to more comedy and laugh more and you will find your enthusiasm. Or listen to happy gurus like Sadhguru.

Those things you suggested are temporary; coming from external stimuli. Nothing is lost. We have to go within ourselves and cultivate those feelings naturally in order to not rely on outside sources to feel what is already within.  We are numbing ourselves when we depend on outside stimuli to make us feel good. Nothing is wrong with entertainment, but if they are being used for the sole purpose of trying to feel something that is already inside of us, or that we wish to feel, then we are not empowering ourselves. A lot of comedians are depressed and use their comedy to bury their sad feelings. Yes, laughter is curative and listening to motivational people often can help to enhance feelings of joy and enthusiasm, but they are coming from the outside and will make us become codependent. The reason why those feelings are there to begin with is because of the thoughts we're entertaining, so if we train the mind to entertain thoughts that align with the way we want to feel then that will be more empowering. 

P.S. I'm also aware that I do this myself - (depending on outside stimuli to feel a particular way), and I'm not speaking from a place of total embodiment, but I'm aware that this is what most of society is doing and why most of us are mentally imprisoned and became slaves to our minds not recognizing we have the power within us to change our way of being and can feel anyway we chose to feel no matter what is happening in the apparent outside world. Tools are great but only when we recognize them as such and that they are temporary and not sustainable and cannot to be dependent upon for lasting change. 


Thought = Time. Without thought there's no time. Death is the end of the illusion.

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1 hour ago, Princess Arabia said:

Those things you suggested are temporary; coming from external stimuli. Nothing is lost. We have to go within ourselves and cultivate those feelings naturally in order to not rely on outside sources to feel what is already within.  We are numbing ourselves when we depend on outside stimuli to make us feel good. Nothing is wrong with entertainment, but if they are being used for the sole purpose of trying to feel something that is already inside of us, or that we wish to feel, then we are not empowering ourselves. A lot of comedians are depressed and use their comedy to bury their sad feelings. Yes, laughter is curative and listening to motivational people often can help to enhance feelings of joy and enthusiasm, but they are coming from the outside and will make us become codependent. The reason why those feelings are there to begin with is because of the thoughts we're entertaining, so if we train the mind to entertain thoughts that align with the way we want to feel then that will be more empowering. 

P.S. I'm also aware that I do this myself - (depending on outside stimuli to feel a particular way), and I'm not speaking from a place of total embodiment, but I'm aware that this is what most of society is doing and why most of us are mentally imprisoned and became slaves to our minds not recognizing we have the power within us to change our way of being and can feel anyway we chose to feel no matter what is happening in the apparent outside world. Tools are great but only when we recognize them as such and that they are temporary and not sustainable and cannot to be dependent upon for lasting change. 

great reminder, yes its true that most of us are prisioners of our mind, unaware of what were all doing. like your posts ;)

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@Barna you don't deserve women women deserve you. Don't put a woman on a pedestal its disgusting and blasphemous to god

Edited by Hojo

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The only "blasphemy" there is, is to not recognize yourself as God. When he says he feels the need to work on himself to attract a mate with "high standards", what he's really saying is he needs to have women as an incentive to push himself to become a better person so he can feel better about himself to be able to attract someone who also feels good about themself so he and his partner are better able to live up to the standards they have both internally set for themselves. That's what he's really saying whether he recognizes it or not. It's not about putting women on a pedestal and who deserves who, he has enough sense to understand that his state of being determines what he attracts, and he doesn't want to attract women with "low standards".  He believes if he works on himself, he will develop enough confidence to approach the type of woman he wants to reflect the image he has created in his mind about himself. Telling people to lower their standards is an indication that you cannot live up to theirs. At least he's willing to put in the work it takes to attract someone he wants to attract and not attract by default like most guys do then complain about what they've attracted.

Edited by Princess Arabia

Thought = Time. Without thought there's no time. Death is the end of the illusion.

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@Barna You can use Neurosemantics for that.

Search for Michael Hall, Meta-States Model, Matrix Model.

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On 7/2/2023 at 0:59 PM, Barna said:

Every day I have to develop myself through work, sports, and learning, otherwise I feel like I don't deserve a woman with high standards

lol people have no idea what they want, what you want will chance when you get it. Its always like that. 

Edited by integral

How is this post just me acting out my ego in the usual ways? Is this post just me venting and justifying my selfishness? Are the things you are posting in alignment with principles of higher consciousness and higher stages of ego development? Are you acting in a mature or immature way? Are you being selfish or selfless in your communication? Are you acting like a monkey or like a God-like being?

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5 hours ago, Princess Arabia said:

Those things you suggested are temporary; coming from external stimuli. Nothing is lost. We have to go within ourselves and cultivate those feelings naturally in order to not rely on outside sources to feel what is already within.  We are numbing ourselves when we depend on outside stimuli to make us feel good. Nothing is wrong with entertainment, but if they are being used for the sole purpose of trying to feel something that is already inside of us, or that we wish to feel, then we are not empowering ourselves. A lot of comedians are depressed and use their comedy to bury their sad feelings. Yes, laughter is curative and listening to motivational people often can help to enhance feelings of joy and enthusiasm, but they are coming from the outside and will make us become codependent. The reason why those feelings are there to begin with is because of the thoughts we're entertaining, so if we train the mind to entertain thoughts that align with the way we want to feel then that will be more empowering. 

P.S. I'm also aware that I do this myself - (depending on outside stimuli to feel a particular way), and I'm not speaking from a place of total embodiment, but I'm aware that this is what most of society is doing and why most of us are mentally imprisoned and became slaves to our minds not recognizing we have the power within us to change our way of being and can feel anyway we chose to feel no matter what is happening in the apparent outside world. Tools are great but only when we recognize them as such and that they are temporary and not sustainable and cannot to be dependent upon for lasting change. 

Yeah I understand what you mean. 

What's the point of you posting here anyway? It's just external stimuli for others.

Why don't you just post on your own blog that nobody reads? Why don't you just go within yourself and contemplate on your own?

Edited by hyruga

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2 hours ago, hyruga said:

Yeah I understand what you mean. 

What's the point of you posting here anyway? It's just external stimuli for others.

Why don't you just post on your own blog that nobody reads? Why don't you just go within yourself and contemplate on your own?

Because I'm just talking to myself here anyway, so wherever I post, it's just me talking to me. So it really doesn't matter where I go to see my own reflection, all that matters is your response to me showed the growth i'm making within myself because I was unbothered by your response. So, thank you for revealing this to me. 


Thought = Time. Without thought there's no time. Death is the end of the illusion.

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5 hours ago, Princess Arabia said:

Because I'm just talking to myself here anyway, so wherever I post, it's just me talking to me. So it really doesn't matter where I go to see my own reflection, all that matters is your response to me showed the growth i'm making within myself because I was unbothered by your response. So, thank you for revealing this to me. 

YAAS Princess! You Do Matter :x


"Wrongness is the unsung hero of growth, for it is only by venturing into the unknown and risking error that we can expand the boundaries of our understanding and pave the way for groundbreaking insights and innovations." -Claude 3 Opus

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spirituality is a 2-step program: know yourself, enjoy yourself

don't put the cart before the horse, do the steps in the right order

enjoying yourself is letting your true nature live

leaping out of bed enthusiastically each morning is a sign this is happening

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On 7/4/2023 at 7:45 PM, Leo Gura said:

Just pursue what you love most in life.

Consciousness work. I simply love it. I was highly neurotic and I was stuffing a lot because of it. But as I let go of neurosis, my awareness increases exponentially. And now, I'm hyper-aware to the point of reaching Monk levels of consciousness. With that being said, I need to develop my communication skills — in today's world, you need money to survive. 

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