Sine

WaveInTheOcean has died

62 posts in this topic

29 minutes ago, egoeimai said:

Second person who commits suicide here. Rip buddy 

Let's be careful with how we state things like that...I think it is important that we do not connect these incidents with the forum or Leo's teachings (not saying you did, just making a statement). People are always constantly reminded to seek out professional help for those states when they are most vulnerable to their own doing. There are trained facilitators of help for people with the most critical conditions. This is not a place where suicidal depression will be healed quickly. Perhaps what Waveintheocean needed was short term pharmacological intervention followed by less aggressive medical support before even considering psychedelic and nonduality. It aches my heart to know that this has happened and I wish he has given the emergency services more chance. There are times when that is the best solution to be able to function again in society.

We will never know what happened and what didn't but I just wanted to mention this. 


“If you find yourself acting to impress others, or avoiding action out of fear of what they might think, you have left the path.” ― Epictetus

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Rest in peace man ?❤


Let thy speech be better then silence, or be silent.

- Pseudo-dionysius 

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@Sine

Sorry to hear about the news.

This user who is also your friend was indeed a beautiful person. 

My heart goes with you and his beloved ones.

 

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3 hours ago, egoeimai said:

November 28,2021

 

Second person who commits suicide here. Rip buddy 

Last visit thingy indicates November 28th but it seems he posted something October 11th


Sailing on the ceiling 

 

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20 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

Sorry to hear this news.

@Sine Did you know him in real life?

@Leo Gura Yes very much. He was sort of my boyfriend but openly and free - best friends first of all. He introduced me to you almost seven years ago and we began the journey of meditation, open-mindedness and psychedelics together. He had periods of depression during winter and a kind of mania during the summers and it had gotten worse the past year. I hadn't talked to him since august because we took some time apart on purpose, but I know he was surrounded my many friends and family and he had also just got accepted to study psychology at the university. We are 27. 

Edited by Sine

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17 hours ago, Cubbage said:

His trip report was one of the most beautifully articulated posts I've ever had the pleasure of reading, I think about it all the time, what a wonderful person he must have been. Heartbroken for you @Sine, sending lots of love. I'm honoured to have shared his profound insights with people, he messaged me and said he was so over the moon to see that his words had deeply affected people. I imagine he was a magnificent & insightful individual.

<3

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My condolences, awful this has happened. 


In the depths of winter,
I finally learned that within me 
there lay an invincible summer.

- Albert Camus

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14 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

He was last active here October 11th.

Yes. I actually checked in on if he was active or not everyday during our "break". Because I knew when he got too depressed he wouldn't be active in here. And I saw he stopped logging in. But I just thought maybe actually he was doing good and being busy with exams and new friends so I didn't contact him. It is really tormenting me now. We had a deal that we would always call if everything went shit. So I thought he would call me if he needed me. I didn't want to interrupt our break because of worry. Life is really really brutal sometimes. I can't go back in time. 

 

15 hours ago, ivankiss said:

We shared quite a few nice moments on here. He seemed like a very cool, joyful and loving guy. I loved interacting with him.

I did not know him irl, but man, it's so hard to believe... 

My condolences to his family and loved ones.

Much love and respect.

Haha, yes, I know he liked interacting with you too and enjoyed your writings and was inspired. Thank you. 

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@Sine Did he ever express any suicidal ideas to you?


You are God. You are Truth. You are Love. You are Infinity.

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@Sine can you tell what mania He suffered from? 

 

I cannot grasp how someone so highly spiritual and wise man decides to end his life. Maybe He had an secret illness (cancer or something like that) 

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Those questioning how this could happen should look up the website AWalkinthephysical.com.  Firstly though, look at the interview on you tube with the website author and book author of his free pdf book mentioned on his website, also titled "A Walk in the Physical."   He remembers his life prior to being reincarnated here and how he had to lower his energy to reach this low energy level of concsiousness.  What he experienced and what his guides told him about our kind of experiences beforehand is highly enlightening.

Edited by Eternity

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   Furst of all, I offer my condolences to you. I've read his trip reports, and the way the user articulated those experiences were really good. I wish you good recovery going through the grief cycle.

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RIP ? 


“You don’t have problems; you are the problem.”

– Swami Chinmayananda

Namaste ? ?

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16 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

@Sine Did he ever express any suicidal ideas to you?

Yes. Around when we first met he had just tried LSD for the first time and had a "bad trip" where he had felt like the universe said he should kill him self. That is around 7 years ago. Then around 3 years ago I had a weird feeling and asked him about it, where he admitted that he had had thoughts about it again and had actually written a note and taken the train out to a place where he could jump out. But then he had gotten second thoughts. One of his friends told me at the funeral that he had mentioned suicidal ideas to him not such a long time ago, but he had promised the friend that he wouldn't do it and that he could never do it to his family and friends. He probably had many more of these thoughts than i was aware of. 

15 hours ago, OBEler said:

@Sine can you tell what mania He suffered from? 

 

I cannot grasp how someone so highly spiritual and wise man decides to end his life. Maybe He had an secret illness (cancer or something like that) 

He expressed thoughts to me about maybe being bipolar and he tried to self medicate with lithium. But one of his friends told me that to him, he had rejected the idea of being bipolar. So I'm not sure how he exactly felt about it. 

The mania looked like god-realizations and being really aware that he was God, as many of you know. But I'm careful about stating that as "mental illness" - i just think it's really complicated. I believe he in fact reached high states of awareness. The problem was more that he couldn't find silence in his thoughts, he couldn't stop talking and he couldn't sleep. He obsessed over topics like our relationship, zodiac signs, personality types and such - when i first started to know him it was just cute and fun parts of his personality but it became more and more like something that hurt him and more and more "manic" to the point where it frightened me a little bit - also a reason why we decided to take time apart. 

When he was depressed he went into himself, stop posting on the forum, he couldn't sleep, he stopped answering my messages and such. I didn't know this part of him so well because he kept it to himself but i believe there was also some anxiety involved. 

He did not himself feel that the "manic" periods was bad - that was when he was happy, I think he was mostly tormented during the depressive periods. It was just to me that the "manic" periods was problematic, because I got scared. 

And then I think that his many experiences with divinity made him simply not afraid to die at all. 

Edited by Sine

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?

Taking a look at his posts, this seems to me once again the same conceptual jungle and emotional suppression that is widespread in this community.

Is it just me, or are you too seeing more people committing suicide than waking up on this forum?


Everyone is waiting for eternity but the Shaman asks: "how about today?"

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@Sine I discovered one and only message i send to him. I asked him, after his claims about higher states of Consciousness and being one with God, what happend to his wounds as a relative person. I suspected some spiritual bypass. He answered back telling me he is preety much healed but there is always some room for continues healing in the collective...

But i never thought he would die by suicide... 

This is so sad...

Edited by Bojan V

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@Sine I felt physically ill in my stomach reading that, these sorts of things can be like that. One of my close friends who I regarded as like a brother commit suicide over a year ago, very similar feelings arise


Hark ye yet again — the little lower layer. All visible objects, man, are but as pasteboard masks. But in each event — in the living act, the undoubted deed — there, some unknown but still reasoning thing puts forth the mouldings of its features from behind the unreasoning mask. If man will strike, strike through the mask! How can the prisoner reach outside except by thrusting through the wall? To me, the white whale is that wall, shoved near to me. Sometimes I think there's naught beyond. But 'tis enough.

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@Sine

This is truly heartbreaking. What a nightmare.

Any chance he committed suicide while on psychadelics or subsequently, due to derealization?

For doing this kind of work, I think more and more it is really important to have very very deep roots in the mundane. Being obsessed with Truth or transcending the ego might results into disdaining the material and/or losing ground. One's epistemology and sens of knowledge can be severely shattered.

Now, I am extra careful because I know I've questioned notions as such as freewill, my own body motricity and wondered if a trip could ever result into self-harm or suicide while on the trip. This is why I think tripping in proper structure with help from 3rd parties with some expertise is the best context to do so. I hope these type of structure will soon be more common.

Edited by Etherial Cat

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This is very sad news to hear...he was a really good guy from my talks with him here...and full of love and wisdom....my condolences to you and his family.


 

Wisdom.  Truth.  Love.

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