Pickup feels fake and low conscious

[Electron]

I recently watched Leo's episode on how to get laid and while I get the gist of what he is saying, I just couldn't wrap my head around the idea of pursuing sex like that. Ultimately, leo was highlighting the importance of inner work and becoming more self-aware as a result of which, one will naturally become attractive. And I agree with that. People in general are naturally drawn to me when I am genuinely happy. But one other thing that happens whenever I am that conscious is that I do not want to pursue sex, or go to a party and talk to a girl just because she looks hot. I'd rather write a poem when I am like that or shower unconditional love on anyone that is around. 

Edit: My point is that if, ultimately, "truth" is what is making you attractive and if at the end, self-awareness is going to give you the kind of relationship filled with deep love and intimacy, why not prioritize truth directly (if you can), rather than spending 5-10 years jumping from one 5/10 relationship to another?  Makes sense? 

Edited November 14, 2021 by Electron

[Leo Gura]

5 minutes ago, Electron said:

I'd rather write a poem when I am like that or shower unconditional love on anyone that is around.

That's creepy and repulsive.

Writing poems is not gonna get you a girl.

If you don't want girls or sex, then do whatever you want. But if you want girls, then stop acting like you're too cool for school.

[Electron]

@Leo Gura You are very likely misinterpreting my words. It's not creepy at all. Its creepy infact, when I am seeking pleasure from a sense of lack. It only escalates my pain and I only want to use the other person to fill the void. That's what's creepy! 

Edited November 14, 2021 by Electron

[Shin]

Yeah but at some point you gotta talk to girls and flirt with them.

You're not gonna learn that by just being a good person, you have to train yourself for it.

You also don't want to do that with your female friends, for obvious reasons so ...

[Raptorsin7]

@Electron

“In your light I learn how to love. In your beauty, how to make poems. You dance inside my chest where no-one sees you, but sometimes I do, and that sight becomes this art.”

― Rumi

[gettoefl]

pickup IS fake problem is otherwise the birds can't reach the bees and the bees can't reach the birds

no matter how poetic sublime or awakened you are

it is a game a phase a role

you are not going to be like that going forward, but hey the girl is not going to be like she was either

thing about beauty for every person is, you will never ever be more beautiful that you are today

your clock is ticking and i am not talking biology but beauty

so get cracking

like freddie mercury says, play the game

[Girzo]

44 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

Writing poems is not gonna get you a girl.

Tell that to my girl. She loves stupid rhymes we make for fun. She also loved every romantic poem I had written her. Writting one will take like 5 to 10 minutes, but she will put it on a board like a trophy. Girls love witty guys who have their way with words. Though, I know, I know, context.

37 minutes ago, Electron said:

Its creepy infact, when I am seeking pleasure from a sense of lack. It only escalates my pain and I only want to use the other person to fill the void. That's what's creepy!

You need to do what works. The first thing to ask is what do you want? Intimacy, I guess. Then, is what you are doing right now working to fulfill that desire? No? Then change it up until you find what works for you, but please stop doing what you already know doesn't work.

Maybe trying to fill the void is not a bad idea, maybe it would grow you as a person.

[MuadDib]

@Electron Come hunting with me man.
 

 

[Shin]

20 minutes ago, Tangerinedream said:

This kinda post isn’t welcome here, guys will call you beta and weak if you don’t prioritise and pursue sex. You have been met instantly with a negative response.  Just shows that this isn’t a place for discussing anything other than pickup unfortunately. 

It's not just about sex but about being better at attractive woman during the flirting stage, you can't avoid this.

And nobody told him to do pickup either, he could just go out with his friends or do some activities outside work/college.

You can't be naturally good at flirting, unless you've trained intuitively during your teenage years, or done some miraculous internal growth + perfect intuitive understanding of how to attract women from some books/videos,

And honestly even then you have to train and you'd still fail miserably the first few times, you'd just get it extremely fast which is great, but doesn't change the fact that some training is required.

[gettoefl]

9 minutes ago, Knowledge Hoarder said:

Then do that lol. What's stopping you? And why do you feel the need to tell everyone? Just avoid talking to girls and do your thing.

...Oh, that's right. You can't do that, because you actually DO want to have sex. I forgot.

"Pua is low consciousness" my ass.

 

it's manipulative it's deceptive it's thinking with your dick but then again like it says in the bible to every thing there is a season and to every task under heaven a reason

like i wrote above

 

[Electron]

@Knowledge Hoarder I said what I felt like personally. I wasn't stating a fact. Notice the word "feels" in the title. If you seek truth, manipulating, and playing the game of the world can certainly "feel" like a backward step. Maybe leo can do both at his level of understanding but its certainly conflicting for me at this stage of my life. Its like having each leg on a different boat, 

Edited November 14, 2021 by Electron

[Harlen Kelly]

4 minutes ago, Electron said:

If you seek truth, manipulating, and playing the game of the world can certainly "feel" like a backward step.

Humans, irrespective of their level of consciousness, are constantly manipulating reality. 

[Preety_India]

57 minutes ago, Tangerinedream said:

This kinda post isn’t welcome here, guys will call you beta and weak if you don’t prioritise and pursue sex. You have been met instantly with a negative response.  Just shows that this isn’t a place for discussing anything other than pickup unfortunately. 

A 100%.

 

[something_else]

1 hour ago, Tangerinedream said:

This kinda post isn’t welcome here, guys will call you beta and weak if you don’t prioritise and pursue sex

Will they?

17 minutes ago, Tangerinedream said:

Yes they care about sex but not to the extremes of trying to pickup hundreds of girls

Most of the guys who get into pickup can't attract one girl, let alone hundreds. Most guys that get into it are socially awkward or shy, they get into pickup so they can explore their sexuality with various different girls and eventually develop themselves enough to meet, attract and bond long-term with a girl they're also attracted to. That's the healthy mindset of pickup, it's more about learning to socialise and become a stronger man and a stronger human being

Yea there are really really toxic parts of it but far less here than anywhere else I'd say, and the benefits of potentially stopping a few future incels are great, but the advice they need has to be relentlessly pragmatic

But yea, when it comes to guys who don't prioritise sex here I've never seen anyone say they need to pursue it relentlessly anyway. It is common for guys who don't get as much sex as they want to pretend that they're 'above it' which I've seen people call out before, that's probably the closest thing to what you said that I've seen on here, but maybe I haven't read the threads you're thinking of

[PurpleTree]

we're also partly animals after all

[SQAAD]

 

4 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

That's creepy and repulsive.

This pickup business is not about being truly authentic and genuine to who you are. Its all a facade. Changing yourself to fit the criteria of other egoic minds so you are not perceived as ''creepy''. Changing how you truly are because you are afraid of getting rejected. Its just jumping throught hoops to achieve a certain result. It has nothing to do with authenticity.  Pickup is all about doing whatever will work on the mind of a woman. Changing yourself to fit her needs and desires.

Leo is basically telling us that we shouldn't be the way we are. Otherwise we won't attract girls from the social matrix. That is the bottom line. Maybe my authentic self is the shy nerdy type.

But no, this is not acceptable. You have to fake it to someone else. And act all macho and confident even if you really don't want to. Imagine if  you had to be shy to get laid, then you would just jump through hoops by doing the exact opposite. You would hide your machoness so you could get laid. lol.

You are doing whatever neccesary to manipulate the other person. Its manipulation and acting to get the desired result. You do what works. Not what is authentic. If you are authentic people don't like you. 

Pickup is similar to Robert Greenes Laws of Power where you use techniques to manipulate the other people around you by acting. But i am not blaming pickup. It just doesn't sit well to many higher consciousness people to play all these egoic animalistic survival games. You have to play all these manipulations otherwise women don't respond well. Fake it until you make it. Truth & honesty won't get you laid.

Quote

Acting is an activity in which a story is told by means of its enactment by an actor or actress who adopts a character.

 

Edited November 14, 2021 by SQAAD

[diamondpenguin]

3 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

That's creepy and repulsive.

Writing poems is not gonna get you a girl.

If you don't want girls or sex, then do whatever you want. But if you want girls, then stop acting like you're too cool for school.

@Leo Gura How is that repulsive? I think that's cute. It's only repulsive to people who overthink everything and try to turn dating into a computer program. But that's the way girls are wired, they want to be totally demolished physically and emotionally. They actually enjoy it, they'd rather get thrown and onto the bed and choked like a rag doll, then have some cute guy sing her a cute poem. Nature is pretty fucked up if you think about it. 

[unborn_chicken]

@SQAAD Thank you for saying that. Took the words out of my mouth.

[something_else]

@SQAAD If what you say is totally true what you're essentially saying is that incel-types should embrace their loneliness and lack of social skills, stay at home and just do whatever feels natural to their 'authentic self'. If your authentic self is sitting around at home wallowing in self-pity then guess they just gotta embrace that, right?

The problem with the 'just be who you are' advice is that you might for some reason or another be terrible at expressing your authentic self, you might have some legitimately bad traits , or you might lack some important skills and fixing that all requires some action

I'd agree framing it as pickup is a bit questionable, better to talk about learning to socialise, especially with girls, I think. That's the lens I view it through anyway

29 minutes ago, SQAAD said:

But no, this is not acceptable. You have to fake it to someone else. And act all macho and confident even if you really don't want to

It's very difficult to argue that confidence is not a trait everyone should try to develop

If you lack confidence you literally cannot be authentic with others, it's impossible. And something like pickup/socialisation is designed to help you develop that confidence and ability to express yourself

[Gesundheit2]

?‍♂️