TrynaBeTurquoise

Tips for Preventing Sexual Stagnation in Relationship?

19 posts in this topic

What are the best tips you can think of

-from a Male POV or Female POV

Stagnation meaning the sexuality between the two partners is depolarized. Doesnt mean you stop having sex but the level of attraction is hard to keep up.

This is something as a male I struggle with, when your sex drive is still on high and you feel really attracted to other women and even though you love and find your partner attractive the calling isnt as strong.


"Started from the bottom and I just realized I'm still there since the money and the fame is an illusion" -Drake doing self-inquiry

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Through conscious intention and effort. Love is a verb. If you stop pedalling, you will fall off the bike.

Furthermore, sexual attraction gives way to appreciation in long term relationships. The butterflies may no longer be there, but you still have a deep connection and longing towards each other. You want the best for each other, so you make sure you are the best version of yourself. 

This purposeful living is also indirectly attractive, however it requires effort. A relationship that rests on its laurels is sure to fail or be unfulfilling. 

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@Knock Thanks for the response, like the bike analogy. 


"Started from the bottom and I just realized I'm still there since the money and the fame is an illusion" -Drake doing self-inquiry

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One way I found that works is live apart and see each other fairly rarely.

If you're having sex every week it's gonna get stale eventually.


You are God. You are Love. You are Infinity. You are Leo.

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Try to not ejaculate every time you have sex. Do small bets of not cumming and see how it works for you

Edited by Hello from Russia

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Relationships never stagnate, only our ideas about them do, just because the ocean isn't stormy at the moment doesn't mean that it's not deep. You can never fully know a person even if you spend your entire life with them and you can never fully know yourself because you are a fiction. Drop your ideas about your partner and the relationship and experience it in a deeper way. It's exactly the same way meditation works. You're becoming more sensitive to life by becoming conscious of more of it in a deeper way by seeking fulfillment from within, then you might find that you no longer look elsewhere for something new. 


My Youtube Channel- Light on Earth “We dance round in a ring and suppose, but the Secret sits in the middle and knows.”― Robert Frost

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Comfort can be the death of attraction. When you're with someone, and they just... give up on bettering themselves, as if they don't feel the drive to impress you anymore. It could be in a physical way, not showing interest or appreciation in someone physically, getting out of shape or not taking care of your body/ health, not showing an active interest or more passively through listening well or a general lack of attention or presence . It's just not attractive.

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My Youtube Channel- Light on Earth “We dance round in a ring and suppose, but the Secret sits in the middle and knows.”― Robert Frost

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A good tip is keeping the provocative atmosphere. Don't only approach her when you are really about to have sex, but be around her sometimes during the day. Some hugs, kisses, provocative words... And then get away as nothing much had happened xD

It will help keeping the flame active because you will be making hormones work and giving space to imagination. This "thriller" put some piece of emotion and stimulate sexual desire for both.

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Think of other people while having sex.   If all else fails, pay for butt implants.  

 

I kid.

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through connection, being present and expressing yourself. Sharing how you feel what you want and desire, asking questions and rekindling courtship/foreplay. Thought is very biased, so interpreting situations is something to be mindful of :o 

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I wonder if living far from someone and seeing them rarely makes a difference if you still text with them constantly.

So much of it seems to be that you have to have your own thing going on and not make your whole life just the relationship ...

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Lots of good stuff here, much love to all you deep divers ❤️


"Started from the bottom and I just realized I'm still there since the money and the fame is an illusion" -Drake doing self-inquiry

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Experiment, experiment and experiment! :D

I strongly believe that it’s the routine that kills sex. Try new things, toys, porn or whatever different way you can come up with. I am in a 18 year relationship and sometimes it does get boring so we come up with different things to keep it good.

Also, there’s nothing wrong with finding other people attractive as long as you do the “deed” at home and it also increases the sex drive. I love Matt Damon, Channing Tatum, my partner loves Cameron Diaz and we laugh about it. We both realize that it’s a different thing to look at someone and the practicality of sleeping with someone. We both don’t really want to go through the awkwardness of taking cloths off in front of a stranger and going through the process of finding what they like and teaching them what we like.


I have an opinion on everything :D

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Tips for Preventing Sexual Stagnation in Relationship?

First tip would be talk to your partner and not a forum :D

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Butt plugs! No seriously, do what  @JustThinkingAloud said, get yourself some badass toys and play around. Your drive is waning as it's becoming too uniform. Push the boundaries a bit, go on some kind of BDSM odyssey, something like that. Get kinky. Start doing some role play, some power play stuff. Have her be the boss for a day and order you around. That might drive you wild, it does me. This is an aquired taste though. My point is, experiment. There could be shit that you don't even know about your own sexuality, if you wanna go there. Maybe get into some watersports. Don't be afraid to be vulnerable either. If you want her to bend you over and find your prostate, do it. Most women I've been with love doing that. 

The tough thing will be, changing the dynamic like that when you know each other too well. You'll both be laughing hard at first, which is fine. It'll take time, persevere. 

Tantric sex? That's a good way forward. Crazy slow build ups, deeper orgasms, a plethora of different sensations. 

 

Edited by Wisebaxter

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It's OK to question your level of commitment too. Sometimes there's not enough baseline attraction there to keep the relationship alive long term. Depending where you and your parter are at in your lives, where you're at with each other, and what you both are looking for in a relationship, perhaps it's the right time to consider moving on? I'm not saying it is, just that if this question is coming up for you, maybe you should really look at it.


How to get to infinity? Divide by zero.

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