Being Nice Doesn't Lead Anywhere

[SQAAD]

Being a nice guy, yields a terrible life:

You don't get access to valuable reproductive resources (women), you don't make much money. You don't earn much respect.

The logic of the program of being a nice guy is "if i am overly nice, people will like me, and not treat me bad. Women will like me and give me access to that koochie, people will like me and will give me oportunities".

Yeah, that could work if we weren't vicious , egotistical, self-centered cave people, who still carry around a Stone Age Brain.

(Most) Women are ruthless, they could care less about your poetic and higher Consciousness ideals. They care about survival. 

Most people are not on a level to appreciate kidness. They only understand cheese.

Few days ago, i was walking in the woods. There was a man in his 50s who made an unpolite remark about me. I just stared at him. 

He said "can you move forward? My dog will think you are a threat".I just kept staring. I was ready to tear him to pieces (in worst case scenario).

He got the message, closed his mouth and left. Funny thing is that i was nice to this man, couple of months ago.

This is the kind of Society we live in. Where you get punished for being nice. And rewarded for being a sociopath.

 

Edited July 9 by SQAAD

[MarkKol]

25 minutes ago, SQAAD said:

valuable reproductive resources (women)

Probably the most pedophilic description of women I’ve seen man

This bad thinking comes from failure to socialize like a normal person with both sexes. Even good socializing with men is enough to attract a woman. They just care about seeing you have a great time.

Edited July 9 by MarkKol

[nistake]

If you define being nice as people pleasing, not setting boundaries, bending over backwards to please, being overly meek, repressing aggression, projecting issues on people, then yes, you're right.

However, you can be kind while being assertive. You can set boundaries in a healthy way. If somebody crosses the line, you can speak up for yourself. You can be confident when it comes to women and not in an ugly, childish stage red manner. You can be even aggressive, but you need to find a healthy way to deal with it.

Is it to difficult emotionally to deal with things like that? For sure. I truly believe it's worth learning it though. I'm not saying I deal with people like that all the time, but the progress I've made over the years are speak for themselves. Now I'm much more secure, I can defend myself, I can be assertive, and I'm much more confident. I used to be a heavy nice guy and I suffered a lot for it. That's why I learned (and still learning) emotional mastery.

Edited July 9 by nistake

[Schizophonia]

The SQAAD loop 😹

 

I like to be nice including because indeed I seek to please by attachment but yes that's not particularly what makes the girl wet in itself, not that energy. 

Edited July 9 by Schizophonia

[Carl-Richard]

7 hours ago, SQAAD said:

The logic of the program of being a nice guy is "if i am overly nice, people will like me, and not treat me bad. Women will like me and give me access to that koochie, people will like me and will give me oportunities".

You should be nice so that the other person is treated nice, not so that you are treated nice. Women like nice men, just not men who use being nice in an act of desperation. If you depend too much on your surroundings and you try to inhabit the role of a man, you won't be fun to hang around, especially for women.

How to get women: have a backbone and be nice.

Edited July 9 by Carl-Richard

[CARDOZZO]

Being nice is fake. Just become kind and show your teeth for those who deserve it.

[Basman]

There's being nice, IE. kind, and there's being nice with strings attached, expecting people to like you, treat you well and avoid conflict. Being kind is a matter of giving. Not necesarilly of how you present yourself. You can never smile and be mostly silent and still be a kind person as someone who finds joy in giving. 

The problem with nice guys is that they are essentially inauthentic and cowardly. They act despite their true feelings to avoid rejection and create a sense of control while typically not being kind in earnest. They "game" their interactions and play up for approval. People have a instinctual dislike of fakeness.

Being nice for survival gains is a fear response.

Edited July 9 by Basman

[Princess Arabia]

56 minutes ago, Carl-Richard said:

You should be nice so that the other person is treated nice, not so that you are treated nice. Women like nice men, just not men who use being nice in an act of desperation.

How to get women: have a backbone and be nice.

Nice

[Recursoinominado]

Being nice will lead you to God, but it will ruin your material life in the process lol

[AION]

If you are upset that your niceness doesn’t get what you want, you are not really nice. That is a painful insight but important to integrate your egoism cloaked in niceness. Nothing wrong with that. 

[Schizophonia]

4 minutes ago, AION said:

If you are upset that your niceness doesn’t get what you want, you are not really nice. That is a painful insight but important to integrate your egoism cloaked in niceness. Nothing wrong with that. 

He looks bery nice in his pp

Edited July 9 by Schizophonia

[AION]

1 hour ago, Schizophonia said:

He looks bery nice in his pp

He is

[Schizophonia]

4 minutes ago, AION said:

He is

Are you ironic too

[Rafael Thundercat]

10 hours ago, SQAAD said:

Being a nice guy, yields a terrible life:

You don't get access to valuable reproductive resources (women), you don't make much money. You don't earn much respect.

The logic of the program of being a nice guy is "if i am overly nice, people will like me, and not treat me bad. Women will like me and give me access to that koochie, people will like me and will give me oportunities".

Yeah, that could work if we weren't vicious , egotistical, self-centered cave people, who still carry around a Stone Age Brain.

(Most) Women are ruthless, they could care less about your poetic and higher Consciousness ideals. They care about survival. 

Most people are not on a level to appreciate kidness. They only understand cheese.

Few days ago, i was walking in the woods. There was a man in his 50s who made an unpolite remark about me. I just stared at him. 

He said "can you move forward? My dog will think you are a threat".I just kept staring. I was ready to tear him to pieces (in worst case scenario).

He got the message, closed his mouth and left. Funny thing is that i was nice to this man, couple of months ago.

This is the kind of Society we live in. Where you get punished for being nice. And rewarded for being a sociopath.

 

Sorry but do you want to make anyone here believe you are Kind after reading your words. Shadow work will help you.

[UnbornTao]

Regardless of what you take niceness to be or mean, not being nice doesn't necessarily imply being the opposite! That's a jump we often make.

Edited July 9 by UnbornTao

[Sugarcoat]

I think a kind of natural niceness comes from your own wellbeing, but you don’t have to do extra beyond basic respect and manners, meaning going out of your way to be nice. That’s not necessary. So a natural niceness doesn’t have to pay off because it’s a reflection of your internal state, it’s how you carry yourself it doesn’t have to benefit you. 
 

Being nice in a natural well mannered respectable way (not the extra way) shouldn’t be an outstanding quality of yours, but rather just how you naturally are, the bare minimum. 

Edited July 9 by Sugarcoat

[Sugarcoat]

2 hours ago, AION said:

If you are upset that your niceness doesn’t get what you want, you are not really nice.

So spot on

[Leo Gura]

You want to be kind but very firm and clear on your values and ambitions.

Ambitious, decisive, strong, but kind and loving. That's the ideal.

The problem is when you act kind as meekness, as lack of confidence, as compromising with foolishness, as having no will of your own, as wanting others to like you, as a way of manipulating them to be kind back to you.

You can be strong but kind, conscious, and loving.

Edited July 9 by Leo Gura

[Natasha Tori Maru]

2 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

You want to be kind but very firm and clear on your values and ambitions.

Ambitious, decisive, strong, but kind and loving. That's the ideal.

The problem is when you act kind as meekness, as lack of confidence, as compromising with foolishness, as having no will of your own, as wanting others to like you, as a way of manipulating them to be kind back to you.

You can be strong but kind, conscious, and loving.

A description of healthy masculinity

[Hojo]

Why are you being so nice if it dosent work then? Is it cause you don't know any other way to get into the woman's magical space? You dont have to be nice. You are essentially saying nice guys dont work but I will continue to be one to intentionally cripple myself and lose at life for no reason at all.