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About Matt23

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  • Birthday 06/05/1992

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    Vancouver, BC, Canada
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  1. Ultimate Cheese
  2. Apparently Turkey has some of the best hair implant places... if you decide to do so. Could do a vacay and hair implant sesh at the same time. But also....Firstly... Do you look good bald? If so, just go bald my man.
  3. Perhaps part of the cause: One school of thought about emotions says that when you avoid, shut down, suppress, don't express, and deny emotions you dislike ("negative" emotions), you simultaneously shut down the better emotions. It's like, you may think you're making yourself feel better by shutting down the really negative emotions, but the "shutting down" works on both ends of the spectrum at the same time. Thus shutting down the really good emotions as well. Maybe try working on and feeling those emotions you dislike. I'd also recommend paying attention to areas in your life (particular emotions, thoughts, circumstances, and especially places in your body) where you find there's not much going on. Places that are numb, don't have feeling, etc.. Numbness and the absence of feelings can be a cover for really big feelings your denying. For example, if you notice you have lots of feelings in your belly area and pelvic area but don't seem to notice much in your throat and chest, try just putting your attention more on the throat and chest area and just search these areas with your awareness more and more and see if something happens. Maybe you notice a little tension somewhere, which upon further concentration on it, becomes something bigger and an emotional release happens or some sort of shift. Something like this happened to me. I've often tried to focus my awareness on my belly and chest. But then realized I've never really focused on my throat and just treated it like "Well... why would I focus on my throat. Emotions and nothing important happens there. It's just physical." -- But then I did and noticed it felt all "congested" emotionally, and then I noticed I was able to speak and express a lot better. Good luck chuck
  4. Also... Ya... it seems like maybe doing some psychological and trauma based work could help with the underlying stuff. There's tons of techniques and therapies out there. Everything from psychotherapy to psychedelics to breathwork, etc.. I'll let you research that. But here's a strategy that might help: Do daily practices, a weekly practice (maybe a day of fasting, quiet, or nature or something, or even a light psychedelic), and then a monthly or bi-monthly practice (perhaps a couple day retreat, larger psychedelic, etc.) ---- I got this from Jamie Wheal. He calls it Hedonic calendaring. another strategy I picked up from Zak Stein (you can look him up on yt etc... he was a student of Ken Wilber's, does work with guys like Jordan Hall, Daniel Schmachtenberger, etc.) is a triad framework when working with the psyche. He basically says that whenever you're working with the psyche, you have to work in these 3 areas... Development: Things like strength training, bio-hacking, learning skills, diet, etc. This part is more about developing yourself as a human; skills, biologically, discipline, habits, etc.. imbalance: if you get too attached to this one at the cost of the others, life can become superficial and meaningless as well as damaging to relationships, the environment, any spiritual connectino, and even one's psychological and emotional health. Ensoulment: Working with emotions, interpersonal and relationship work, Jungian stuff, dreams, IFS therapy, etc.. This part is all about facing and feeling the pain of the world/yourself, rather than running from it. imbalance: If you get to attached to this at the cost of the other areas, it can end up being an endless cycle of emotional healing and work. Transcendent: Meditation, spiritual practices, 'waking up' stuff, witnessing beauty, (comes in handy especially if the pain of the world and 'ensoulment' becomes too much and you need to take a break almost, so that you don't get stuck in nihilism, pain, and despair). This part is more about transcending the pain of the world, helping to not get bogged down in it and to still see the beauty, joy, and love of life even amongst the pain. imbalance: if you become too attached to this one then it can lead to spiritual bypassing, "spiritual psychopathy", and just not giving a shit about the world and relationships and just blissing out alone and perhaps even treating others like shit and saying "it's all love" etc..
  5. Look, you gotta tell her how you genuinely feel. Otherwise, you'll be creating more hurt though the resentment that will slip out over the years and you'll both be miserable. By just getting it over with, you're saving both of you a ton more hurt that, though it may seem isn't as much as telling her the truth now, is more hurt since it's spread over many months and years. Also, people can handle stuff and can actually appreciate truth. Give her the respect of telling her she can handle stuff buy telling the truth. Perhaps also look more into why you don't want to tell her and investigate it more thoroughly. Don't forget to be compassionate and loving towards yourself and your needs as well. If she won't have sex due to trauma, I'd almost say maybe it's better for her to wait on being in a relationship and work on that instead. And it sounds you could use a lot more sex Sounds like just starting to do shit, create goals and accomplish them, may be a best route. Even if you're unsure if the goal is in line with your authentic values. Just try shit. experiment. Get out there and tackle the world sort of. Make a name for yourself. Just doing shit will give you feedback about what you want and don't want. Then maybe try revisiting figuring out your values more in depth. I did the LP course as well a few years ago and felt similarly. But now I revisited the values section and was quite amazed at how much more clearly I felt my values to be (after changing things around). Maybe start with the social and financial. Maybe get a job that could help you socially; like working with people you want to be around and that affords you the opportunity to socialize and work on that. Serving perhaps? You just do it. There's no "how". Don't distract and/or deceive yourself with thinking "I gotta figure out how to do it before doing it. Or else how can I do it?!" You just do it. How do you breath? You just do it. How do you be more honest? How do you be more authentic? How do you tell the truth about what you're thinking, feeling, and noticing? I'll let you figure that out. Good luck. Also... don't get to lost or put too much importance on all of this either. Just chilling is good as well. Not taking things, yourself, life too seriously. It's all ok.
  6. I get the pricing issue. But also... people gotta feed themselves, pay rent, and yes, pay to have an enjoyable and not depleting lifestyle. I wouldn't want to see a therapist who's barely scratching away a living such that they are depleted and miserable. I'd want someone who's able to be there emotionally, which to me requires they be monetarily sufficient to live a lifestyle that's sane, enjoyable, and healthy (which is costly). But ya... life and survival is transactional I suppose. I mean, I think it's better than not having any. I've thought a bit about this and ya, maybe more government funding is better. OR funding from other sources. I think the issue you point out is probably a microcosm of a much larger issue or characteristic of how culture works, survival works, and just life itself. Got example, on a cultural level, it'd be interesting to see how other cultures dealt with mental health issues, or even how much of it they had (if it was a small amount, maybe they didn't need to have mental health professionals since maybe they had pieces of cultural and social-psychological-spiritual technologies that combated the mental health issues forming in the first place; like rituals, times of spiritual congregation, 4 day work weeks... who knows). You could also look at today's economic system and see how it differes from other cultures, and how it shapes our behaviors within it. As a way to see how it could be influencing this issue. Like, for example, I think many cultures have as an integral part of their structure a class or sect of spiritual people who would be taken care of by the society but who would sort of denounce themselves from taking part in culture as lay people would. Shamans, priests, monks, etc.. Maybe cultures, ours included, need this sort of class of people to act as psychological and social "doctors", guides, etc. since they have the advantage of being "outside of culture and not beholden to it yet they can also interact and help it along". Feedback and responses and ideas.
  7. Perhaps... but Johnny V. and some of the people he talks with are some of the best you're going to get. An issue in determining "who's better" and not is probably that it's relative and we have no absolute reference point. So then it comes down mostly to unconscious and conscious biases and preferences which could co-opt our ability to be accurate judges of people. Though, I do also think that we have the ability to discern whether others are coming from a "higher" place, a more accurate, and sophisticated, and good faith position than others. Like, it's obvious to me, and I think many, that John Vervaeke is a more good faith and intelligent actor than say someone like Trump, even Ben Shapiro (perhaps not as obvious to some about Ben though). This is where I think the "it's all relative" statement can become foolish; when it no longer makes judgement calls, discerns between higher-lower, better-worse, etc..
  8. Hard to pick one favorite. piano mixed with an orchestra.... still piano though.
  9. I dunno... Couldn't hurt if you can afford it. Michael569 on the forum here works in the nutrition and physical health field and can offer consultations. I worked with him and he seems like he knows his stuff. You could also go to a naturopath. They sometimes offer chelation and seem to know more about it. On the other hand, I read some of those papers that Leo put on his chelation video and they were literally giving 30mg doses over long time periods to infants and really young children, which makes me think it's not as harmful as I thought before. Though, I'm no doctor, nor have I researched this stuff barely at all.. so even my ability to discern what studies say could be significantly impaired. Look up some stuff on forums and see what others' experiences are. Chat to doctors and naturopaths. --- I literally walked into a pharmacy and just asked the pharmacist what she thought about chelation. She thought it was pretty safe and no need to be overly concerned doing it yourself.
  10. Sorry. Rule 42A says "People on the self-actualization and/or spiritual paths must abstain from any fiction books. Failure to do so will result in eternal damnation and hellfire."
  11. Ya, probably mostly to just get you away from them and them feeling like not comfortable saying no and not wanting the hassle, etc.. Happened to me a couple weekends ago. Nothing personal. I get it. Some people just aren't comfortable saying "no" to someone's face... I can imagine many people aren't actually.
  12. Well, it's also not giving the freedom to choose who you desire to come. Sometimes that's a good and necessary and healthy thing as well. Obviously anything can be abused... But I think having that choice is better than not. Not everyone likes everyone else, and being forced to invite others you dislike, especially for legit reasons, is kinda... I dunno... bogus or something. Like, ya... I think a big misinterpretation of this philosophy of "everyone love everyone" and "everyone is connected and accepted" is that it means you can't say "no" to certain people (and this is especially true with those who've done not great things, or have difficult personality styles, and even just people you dislike; I don't think people should be forced to invite others they dislike). Anyhoo... blabbidy bla bla.
  13. It sounds to me like you may be reacting from some sort of distorted belief about yourself that says something like "I'm not good enough", or something like this. It also sounds like it's coming from a place of negative motivation rather than a more genuine positive motivation (wanting something rather than running from something), which usually doesn't fulfill much. I'd first look into and work on whatever beliefs may be contributing to this. Why do you believe you need to be hard? Do you believe you're weak? Why? Etc.. Get to the core. Then try to get as clear as possible about your truest most positive values. Things that make you feel joy, love, and light. Things that make you cry thinking about etc.. DO THESE. Also, in the end, if you still want to go, go. Life is full of unusual twists and turns, and you can always learn something from any experience. You never know what you may discover.