If you force yourself to function with ADHD and ignore the fact that you are pursuing something you don't care about, what you get is success, but you pay with something much much much worse than depression: Functional depression.
I tend to look at hardships in my life through the lens of asking what I learned from it and because of that I never regret anything I do. However, there is one decision in my life that had a devastating impact on my life and I'm not sure if I can reverse the damage it has left on my body.
It was the decision to not give up and push through no matter what.
I did have success, I was able to study successfully, but it took an enormous toll on my body. I'm still suffering from chronic pain because of this phase in my life. It has been four years now of pain every day.
I don't believe that the lived experience of Dr. Mike is desirable at all. What happens if you push through doing the things that you don't actually want to do is that you become insecure and detached from your body.
I believe that this is the case with Dr. Mike. For him, his body is only a tool, tasked to grow like a balloon to soothe his insecurity that he has because he's making his life unnecessarily hard for his neurodivergency. I've once seen a video where he was tasked to do athletic activities like the broad jump and it's clear that he's completely detached from his body.
In some way my sensitivity saved me from pursuing this path because the chronic pain became unbearable. I think if I was not sensitive at all, I would still be on this path and suffering like Mike.
At the end of the day, what Mike wants to do is pursue his special interest. And that's what he's doing on YouTube. But if you think about it, neither does he need to take steroids or have bad body awareness to pursue it, nor does he need a PhD. He's only pursuing things he doesn't care about to prove to himself that he's good enough. I know this feeling exactly and I am so glad I have grown out of it.

Oho I've been summoned 💅
I've not been very active lately since I have been doing glossopoeia.
I have revoked this statement. When I made it, my definition of "meaning" was poor. The exact opposite is true, actually. People with ADHD are extremely sensitive to meaning because they can't be distracted as easily by conventions, social truths and ideology.
Yes, according to this framing, neurotypical people are actually the ones who are distracted by status, and obeying to authority.
When somebody says "I have ADHD and I want to be successful" it first has to be unpacked, what is meant by "success".
The problem with the term success is that it includes purpose and meaning, but it also includes things like social status and recognition. If you have ADHD you will likely need to completely redefine what success is to you.
The reason why it is so hard to get a degree or to make money with ADHD is because "a degree" and "money" are both social constructs. People with ADHD fundamentally don't care about social constructs. The way to be productive with ADHD is to stop chasing degrees and money and try to focus on what is immediately meaningful at any given time.
If you have no choice and you for some reason I have to get an education because of parents or something, it would be smart to choose some education that has as many practical elements as possible.
The logic of an ADHD brain works like this for example: why would I sacrifice so much for a piece of paper that says "bachelor of science" if I could instead program a video game and instead of receiving some piece of paper, I could have my own video game that I can play. This seems completely reasonable. But the majority of the population wants the piece of paper more because of its social value. The same is true with money. Money, also, just a piece of paper that many people are crazy about not including people with ADHD.

@Carl-RichardThis is Vervaeke right?
I agree that purpose, coherence, significance, connectedness are crutial to meaning, but I'm describing and ordering these terms in a very perculiar and extremely precise and specific way.
I am currently experimenting with numerology by assigning numbers to different aspects of being with the goal of using these as building blocks to build more complex aspects of being.
I'm trying to find 101 (100 + 0) of these building blocks which right now I call "traces". If you are interested to know which they are, follow the development of my journal where I post most of my thought process every day:
Entry March.23.3.5 is most relevant.
 
Meaning, purpose, coherence, significance, connectedness in the trace ontology.
Meaning 
    = 12 
    = "second manifestation of the continuum"
11 = Idea
Continuum = 10
Purpose
    = dharma
    = path
    = telos
    = 40
Fun fact: 
Kleos 
    = "last step of the path"
    = 49
Fun fact nr. 2: 50 = sunyata.
Coherence
    might be complexity-resonance
    = 30-45 = 3045
Significance
    might be 49 actually
    could also be 48
    = potenciality.
49 is "manifested potence" so weather significance is 48 or 49 depends on weather it is implies manifestation or not.
Connectedness
    is spacial-resonance
    = 2345
Connection requires seperation but not fragmentation nor unity. That's why space = 212246 = unity-duality-harmony = 23 is an important part.

I think "ADHD is insensitive to meaning" is an unfortunate and "insensitive" way to frame it.
I would instead frame it as ADHD jumps between meaning frameworks quickly (and therefore might spend less time "deepening" or expanding on any single framework). It's a difference in dynamics, not "ontology". Every mind is driven by meaning. It's just some are less "sequential" about it than others (did I just deconstruct your paradigm by saying that?).
For example, The Mars Volta, or any band that goes from low intensity to high intensity or switches textures or modes or ideas many times throughout a song (e.g. King Crimson, Opeth), are very ADHD-like, but they are also extremely structured and cohesive (i.e. meaningful). Any song ever made has structure and cohesion. It just happens at many levels simultaneously, and you can tweak each level more in the direction of ADHD or "autism".
I think you might define meaning differently than I do. How do you define it?

Damn you guys need to chill with your "I'm sO anTi cOrrUptIon thAt I cAn'T liStEn to rAp".
I love rap and I don't really give much of a shit about what they rap about.
If I did not have rap a massive chunk of my happiness would be gone. There are just certain moods where rap works just perfectly to amplify that mood, feel alive and dance.
Also I think the movement of rappers is genius. The way they dance. It is both powerful, but also relaxed. It can be argued that this is a superior way of movement from the daoist perspective. You cannot have power without weakness. In the same way, you cannot have strength without relaxation.
You cannot tell me this isn't a form of true power. The power of not giving a damn.
If I didn't have metal, dubstep, rap, I would be significantly less powerful.

Sorry that I have to do this but here it goes:
I have thought about the connection between mayovirginity and music. Also, I have a unique view on EDM since I spent hundreds of hours producing it, and therefore contemplating it.
I have observed that, if one is more on the ADHD side, they like listening to "meaningless" music (remember: people with ADHD are insensitive to meaning and ideology).
So EDM basically. (the way I use this word EDM here is roughly this: music that is mainly produced by bedroom producers with the production as the focal point rather than the band, the singer, the lyrics, etc.) The thing with EDM is that very often it doesn't have lyrics and if it does, the lyrics are very shallow.
EDM is pretty much identityless. It does not really point to some Identification with a Group. (Counter examples, are: "I listen to country music, because I identify with the American way of living" "I listen to rap because I identify with a rapper lifestyle")
People listen to EDM Listen to EDM for its qualia (hsp) and for its pattern (autism), not because of its poetry. I'm not sure what effect being HSP has on the music taste. I think being HSP just means that music has more ability to conjure emotions in you. If music can make you cry, you are likely an HSP.
The more autistic a person is, the more repetitive the music is. A lot of autistic people like techno, for example. Not changing one's music taste at all for years is also something that autistic people like to do.
If you are way more ADHD than autistic, then what can happen is that you like super chaotic music like hyper pop (notice that the lyrics of hyper pop are often deliberately shallow and nonsensical. Examples: 100gecs, Dylan Brady)
I remember listening to the exact same kind of music as Leo when I just got into liking music in the first place. At first, I only listened to EDM and at some point I only listened to dubstep which is batshit insane if I think about it.
At some point this narrow music taste was just too limiting for me because I could not connect with anybody through music, so I forced my music taste to evolve and broaden.
This decision had an extremely positive effect on almost all of my relationships and I never looked back. Music taste was the cornerstone of my last longterm relationship.

This is the fundamental pain of someone who is autistic and is low entanglement with sensitivity of being  (short: Is low sensitivity. Other: Non-HSP, non-new-age, non-esohead, non-energy-and-vibration, non-kriya-yoga) on top of that.
The advice "just be with your subjective experience" does not work since you are low sensitivity of being.

The advice "Just find out who you are. Find an identity" deos not work since autistic people don't care about symbolic identity since they are low simultaneity of being (other: Symbol-insensitive, non-conform, ADHD, low filtering, low parallel processing, low access to unconscious, high precision, good vision)
The advice "just be (with the absolute)" is a step in the right direction, but it is not the whole solution since autistic people are high sequenciality of being, which means their existence requires pattern, repetition, sequence, etc.
The advice "focus on the journey" is great since the "journey" is itself a sequence.
But this does not address the fundamental problem of autistic people on this planet which is:
The existence of autistic people is dependent on patterns and 99.9% of all patterns presented in this world:
Contain sensation, Contain symbols, Are not precise and logical enough, Contain internal contradictions and/or Contain contradictions with immediate being* *I'm trying to be broader than "immediate experience" here
Physics is cool but it is not yet unified and it also only explains what reality does not what it is.
Analytical Idealism is a candidate for a logical ontology and claiming that reality is mind is cool and all but it doesn't explain much.
Mathematics is heaven for autistic people but it only relates to reality through physics.
So to solve this issue, some mega autistic person needs to find a grand unifying ontological cosmology (six o's!) that unifies maths, physics and analytical idealism, such that an ideal language can be found to describe all of reality from the bottom up, starting with the absolute.
If this language would be found, it would be "the last pattern" so to say and it would finally give every hardcore autistic person peace. If that would ever be found, it would mark the beginning of the golden age of autism (lol).
This is precisely what I'm searching currently and I'm making great progress. There are a lot of mysteries that I managed to explain with my theory and I'm not planning to stop anytime soon.
If you want an example of how powerful this theory is, read this post, where I demystify schizophrenia with it:
 

Marxists criticize him for arguing that secret societies are the main issue of geopolitics. They say this distracts from the real problem, which is capitalism. Also, antisemitism actually strengthens Zionism since Zionism is to a huge extent based in victim-identity.
I have even heard the theory that Jiang is actually funded my the Mossad to increase antisemitism for that reason. It is easier to justify violence against someone who is hateful. This does not seem so far-fetched when you learn that Israel funded terrorist groups and enabled them for that reason. This is actually how Zionism operates.
Professor Jiang might be Chinese, but he seems to be a liberal. Liberals can not liberate anyone because it is liberalism that is the problem. If you somehow get rid of the secret societies you will still have liberalism, and therefore you will still have endless wars.
But at the end I think there is actually an interplay between esoteric societies and capitalism.
It could be argued that this forum is in some way an esoteric group. The term esotericism originally does not mean "believing in bogus or in ideas that are not epistemologically grounded" but it actually just meant something like "advanced teachings that are only accessible to the few".
The isolation of these groups simply comes from the fact that just a very small minority of people can grasp truly advanced teachings and the secrecy comes from members trying to protect normies form heavy topics like suicide, nihilism, psychedelic use etc. Sounds familiar right?
What separates this forum from an esoteric society with material influence is that Leo and therefore most members of this forum don't believe materialism is significant and therefore don't have the motivation to have massive material influence in the world.
But this is not true for people who engage in occultism. The core principle of occultism is "as above, so below" which I interpret as encouragement to engage with and change material reality.
If you define a powerful esoteric society as: "A group of people with advanced teachings that use those teachings to influence material reality" then suddenly, Marxists-Leninists with their dialectical materialism fall under that definition. But of course, Marxism-Leninism does not have enough spiritual depth to be a complete esoteric society.
The reason why the western esoteric societies have such a disastrous impact on the world (if what Jiang is speculating is true of course) is not because they're evil or sadistic or some shit, it's simply because they are liberal.
I once went to a meeting of Freemasons and also a meeting of the Lectorium Rosicrucianum in Germany, and they were great people with spiritual depth and they were pretty harmless. There was indeed not baby on the menu, unfortunately.
However, they were hardcore liberals like pretty much all people in the west who are not educated in Marxism, historical materialism, anti-imperialism, etc. and also they are the whitest people I have ever seen.
The only upper hand these societies have over Marxism-Leninism is that they have more spiritual depth and a deep historical grounding in western culture. If one would infuse Marxism-Leninism with spiritual depth with imagery that is familiar to the west, communists would take over very quickly. This is exactly what I'm trying to do.

I think that's fair. I'm not offended. I'm not even expecting you to be comfortable with it. This dissonance between people with different modes of existence is a central part of my model. There is a crucial difference between dissonance and alienation.
Did you notice how you moved from "this guy is sick" (alienation) to "I'm still not quite comfortable but I kinda understand it" (dissonance without alienation)? Allowing the possibility for alienation to turn into "neutral" dissonance is one of the core purposes of my model. It is not just mental masturbation. It has real world applications.
If you alienate pedophiles (okay at this point I might have to clarify that I'm not a pedophile) what happens is they won't say "I guess I will stop being a pedophile now". This is not how these kinds of pathologies and addictions work. If they feel bad they will just download more CP. Paradoxically, If you validate their existence (there is an important distinction between validating someone's existence and validating or enabling someone's behavior), the probability that they will stop is much higher since then they will be able to accept themselves.
Think about it. If you are obnoxious because you hate yourself and because of that get abandoned and because of that resort to exerting power over helpless kids, which makes you hate yourself even more which makes you more alone, you get into a vicious circle that is extremely hard to get out of.
This is also true for drugs, but it is especially true if you are a pedophile because if you are a pedophile NO ONE accepts you other than opportunists or pedophiles or both. (And people are wondering how Jeffry Epstein got so powerful. I think he just went around and gave the powerful people what they truly want which is someone who affirms their existence)
HAAHAHAHHA yeah so this post did not arise from me asking myself "why do I like children" but actually from "If I have ADHD this means age is just a number for me. But then why am I appalled at the thought of ... anyways if not for ideological reasons?". 
This is why I came up with this additional condition of "being in the abyss" and I think it checks out pretty well.

(It'll be up for a bit,  I dont know if its leo approved, so, if it isnt im gonna take it down) 
Post your pic here, so we laugh at ourselves.
I mean, get to know each other's faces.
Just for fun ?
Edit: 
I'll start with mine first ! 

This is an intresting example. Pattern is a type of qualia, that seems to be on a level, thats neither just subjective nor objective.

There is exactly one leap of faith that you need to do to break out of the faith-doubt, success-failure spiral, which is the faith in letting go of all self-doubt.
Once you have faith that you deserve to exist purely by virtue of being yourself, you are liberated.
Once your only goal is non-doubt which is authenticity, you can not fail anymore.
This idea of asking yourself "do I deserve to live? What do I have to achieve to be able to prove that I deserve to exist?" is an idea that does only exist in humans. It does not exist in the animal kingdom and it also did not exist in humanity until it was corrupted by civilization and private property.
It is a narrative that is artificially perpetuated, so the working class keep serving those who own the means of production. In truth, the world does not need capitalism anymore. There exists enough wealth to make everybody on the planet self-actualize and live authentically on the long run. The only reason why capitalist ideology is still so prevalent is because western people are so propagandized by anti-communism propaganda.

The trick to breathing properly is that when you breathe in, you try to relax your upper body, such that there is pressure between your diaphragm and your upper body.
Try to only breathe with your diaphragm with every other muscle being relaxed. Also try to relax your diaphragm as much as possible. 
This pressure that builds up will open your chakras. You can practice with increasing that pressure. When you master it and you maximize pressure you will be able to have full body orgasms. I personally don't do it often because it's very intense and exhausting.
Another important point is that the chakra energy in the lower chakras is sexual energy.  Do what do you want is some kind of "pure horniness".
Then what you do is you alchemise the sexual energy into divine energy, by pulling it up your spine. This is how I understand kundalini yoga.
All of this will work easier, the more empty your mind is.
One last thing: One has finite sexual energy avaliable each day. It can be depleted. It's actually not a bad thing if you don't have any sexual energy left. just do normal Zazen meditation.
In my understanding, you can have legit awakenings without any of the energy stuff. Using the energy of the kundalini is like strapping a rocket engine to your car. You can also arrive without the engine, but it takes longer. Also using rocket engines is more dangerous.

OK, let me be more precise. What I meant was "less volume per second".
Long breaths can calm the nervous system very well, there is nothing wrong with them, except if you breathe more volume per second then necessary.
There exist misconceptions about oxygen intake. This myth suggests, that "the more you breathe, the more oxygen is in your blood". This is wrong.
If you don't happen to hold your breath for a long time, which I assume you don't in every day activity, then there's always enough oxygen in your blood. What's crucial is not how much oxygen is in your blood, but how well the oxygen is delivered to the cells.
This is where it gets counterintuitive. The more CO2 you have in your blood, the more oxygen can be delivered to your cells. This is called the Bohr effect. What this means is, the less CO2 you breathe out, meaning, the less volume you breathe per second, the more effectively your cells will get supplied with oxygen.
The best way to achieve this is by relaxing the diaphragm. It is called "reduced breathing" and it is an art in and of itself. 
This is why in advanced Kriya yoga, the aim is to reach the "breathless state".

I have written about the topic here: 
One also has to be HSP and ADHD in addition to autistic to be able to come up with a conspiracy theory. 
Dependent on whether the autism dominates, or HSP dominates will change the "flavour" of the theory, with it being more material and logical when you are more autistic and it being more magical when you are dominant HSP.
ADHD is the necessity for unconventionality. 
The reason why you need to be HSP, is because a purely autistic person can only follow instructions. HSP has the ability to ruminate, due to the wiring of their brains, which includes more feedback loops. The ability of the HSP-autistic person is feed a thought back into itself, and coming up with a new thought in that way. When you do that for a long period of time, you will reach conclusions that are far beyond the established knowledge. there has always been these people, they just used to call them, magicians, shamans, and prophets, etc.

I have developed an ontology off hell, which is alienation, which is a super set of what you mean when you say "gore".
I made an extensive post about it here:
Here's my interpretation of your post: when you say "gore", what you seem to mean is the superset of what I call "the maw" and "the abyss".
My interpretation of the first example, is that you have established a relationship with the fences, which has created an existence space between you two (also, the fences are part of the existence space you span with your stepdad). When the fences are destroyed, this space that is a part of you disintegrates, and turns into the abyss. Since there is no existence, and therefore no self beyond the existence space, the feeling that you describe is the feeling of self-disintegration, more broadly, self–alienation.
this is also the feeling you have after a break up, for example. More broadly, when you fell abandoned.
The second example is an entirely different phenomenon that also leads to self-alienation, which is why you saw the connection. In my model of horror, involuntary fusion,with another being or disfigurement, is horror and alienation through the collapse of boundaries. When you become one with another being, the existence space that you were spanning is collapsing, which is also a kind of loss of self, but an entirely different mechanism behind the abyss. The metaphor that I'm using is "the devouring", which is the maw.
In a relationship, this can happen, either when you are too obsessed with one another, or they are traumatized from past alienations, which leads to them to seek unity and cling obsessively.

@Natasha Tori Maru the reason why pets are pure godliness, is because they don't have the ability to reflect on and judge being, because they didn't eat from the tree of knowledge.
When you have the ability to judge being, you have the ability to alienate others when you judge, and alienate yourself, when when you self-judge.
All hate and all evil originates from alienation.
people falsely think that self-judgment is necessary for survival, but that is wrong. If you stop self-judging, you will become so authentic and so loving, that people in your environment will automatically want to help you with anything.
People falsely think that self-critique is necessary for skepticism, and this is also wrong. If you have audhd, you don't need self critique to sense, that your current worldview is flawed, and you don't need the motivation to seek the antithesis to your current worldview because you will seek them out of curiosity automatically, and integrate them, making you intuitively engage in dialectical thinking. If you are patient with yourself, you will eventually reach the right conclusions. It just takes time.
One of my childhood friends told me yesterday, that I for brief period, believed that the Earth was flat when I was like 15.
If you have audhd, you don't get that head start that other people have, who just accept the word view that is given to them. This "starting at zero" of audhd people can lead to frustration, but it is necessary for radical skepticism. Be patient with yourself.

Nothing normative was claimed in my statements. You're free to do whatever. Just know suffering means identification with that which is cyclical ("sequential"?). If you're not identified, you're not suffering (but of course, be careful turning this into denial and self-deception; you very likely are identified). That's why letting go is essentially the direct path to enlightenment. But do you want to let go? That is the question.

you are completely correct. Of course I would not use the word with retardation, but I understand what you mean.
The reason why Neurotypicals hate neurodivergent people It's not just because of ignorance. The reason is much much much deeper.
What do you need to understand is for a Neurotypical person, their identity and their conformity is their existence. So when the neurodivergent person runs around shitting on conformity either directly or through their actions, they are invalidating the existence of the Neurotypicals, which leads to them being alienated of themselves by the suggestion of their own non-existence.
So this hate is existential in nature. This conflict can not be solved. There will always be dissonance between the neutotypical and the neurodivergent for that reason.
What I teach, though is that this dissonance can be used for counteracting the destabilizing effect that pure resonance, which is pure love, which is pure unity, has on the existence space. This process of counteraction through complementary spanning leads to symbiosic space. This is why the neurodivergent people and the Neurotypical people are in reality codependent of the other.
It is also the reason why free love in hippie communes can lead to disaster, because in free love, there is the risk that the overrepresentation of unity among likeminded people causes the collapse of existence space. this is not to hit on hippies, usually people naturally seek this counteraction. This is why the attraction of opposites exists in the first place. Precisely because they repel each other paradoxically. OK, here's an esoteric thought: what if that's the dynamic that is precisely what keeps atoms intact? What if the electron and the proton are secretly in love?
This leads to an interesting distinction between being in love, which is symbiosis and being love, which is unity. That's why you don't want to meet your soulmate, because if you were, you would mistake being love, which is obsession with being in love, which is symbiosis. This is actually what happened to me. This is why the saying that there has to be some amount of conflict and therefore distance in a relationship is true.
With understanding of the dissonance between opposites, it does not have to turn into alienation. This is the basis for my plan to reduce fragmentation in society.

Sitting allows for independence from the strive for dual existence which is passion.
This Liberation arises without the requirement of magic, which is the spanning of stable space through complementarity, which is the synthesis of itself with its opposite, with which it is in dissonance with.
Further, it allows for the experience of non-dual infinity in the unification with God.
When you leave out the middle part, you've got your one-liner.

I'm visiting my mom right now and she has a dog named Lilith. This dog is very happy to see me and she likes to interact with me, but I had this observation that I didn't really quite understand why she was happy, because I didn't really know what I was doing right with her. 
I feel the same way with children, so I did a contemplation about how to communicate with dogs and I think there's a lot of overlap in how to communicate with animals and with children since children and animals just have the same needs as adults but in a more trivial way.
According to my model, for any entity, there are exist three modes of being which are
being felt  being seen, and being a part. These modes of being are manifestations of the principle of sensitivity, simultateity, and sequenciality.
The way to make a being happy is by reminding it that it exists, which is done through engaging their mode of existence.
In order to affirm the mode of being seen of an entity is with gesture. This can be done, purely by giving them attention and affirming their existence.
In order to affirm their mode of being a part you interact with them by playing out a pattern, so this is play for example. Also, if you act out your own pattern and they get to observe your pattern and merge their pattern with your pattern, you also engage their need of being a part.
The way to engage their mode of being felt is by empathizing with them. If you interact with them and feel happy about it and you are open about sharing your emotions with them they will they will receive your inner state and this will engage their need of being felt.
This is why it feels like it is at the same time hard and easy to interact with a child because it's impossible to interact with it at the level of complexity of interaction with an adult, but it is also easy because it because a child or an animal is happy with much less.

I'm proposing a new core practice of self-actualization that is complementary to the existing ones: Waking up, growing up, cleanign up, showing up, (opening up, stepping up)
I call this "glowing up".
It means becoming precisely aware of ones perculiar wiring and integrating this knowledge into the other practices. It includes the notion that saying "I have unique genetics" is not enough for true self acceptance and therefore self-actualization.

The way to cope with ADHD is by rejecting the chase of symbols like degrees, prestiguous jobs, monogamy, marrige, etc.
Don't ever go to a university or do any training ever. You can teach yourself anything by yourself autodidactically.
The less prestige the thing has that you do more more likely it is that you are on the track of healing.
Also you need to always put your freedom first.
If you do these things you will not need any medication

My best explaination of OCD is that if you are autistic, you can't live without a certain amount of repetitive behaviour.
If you for some reason don't allow youself to engage with that enough because you think repetitive behaviour is unproductive or something (which it's not necessarily), your body will compulsively seek repetition anyways and that is what ocd is. If you fight ocd together with the other repetitive behaviour you might have, it will only get worse.
If you allow youself to engage in non harmful repetitive behaviour, the ocd should go away

I highly recommend you reading this. Especially if you also have ADHD (non-conformist) together with your autism:
This is the most relevant part of the post:
You can find love if you find someone who also connects with people via analysis. 
This is also relevant:
A good option for you to contribute in a wage labor context would be that you ask some company to give you access to a shit ton of their data (or code if they are a software company for example) and then you just spend your work hours plunging into the data and search for patterns. If you understand these so called "highly functional" symbol oriented people, you will realize that none of them really know what they are doing. They all just run some shallow script of conformity. They need people like you who can see everything as it is otherwise they are unable to make good business decisions.
But it is not important that you contribute in the wage labor context. You will already contribute enough when you just talk about your interests on the internet.
Also, you can talk to normies and analyze their lives, informing them about contradictions in their relationships for example