StripedGiraffe

I'm looking forward to learning about this new substance. I'm getting ready for my first 5-me0 experience (via bufo) next weekend but I'll probably be adding this new substance to the wish list lol.

This topic of relaxing and opening through our automatic reactions is one of the main pillars of the book, "The Untethered Soul". The book came to me in a dream last week and it's woth listening to/reading imo.

He means this, right now. Precisely your experience at this moment.

2/21/2021 (During Trip) The dream-like thing we call reality is flexing its intelligence. These words might as well be an arrow pointing directly back at you. I love to look for the secret in the words, or to try to figure it out by piecing concepts together but no matter how accurate the words and ideas are, they are a complete and total joke. They utterly fail and conveying the Truth because the fullness, and the essence, of what's really going on can never be conveyed. It simply is. It's right here. It's right now. You can try to capture it and jar it up for the future but you'll never be able to. It is what you are right now. It is this happening. All of it. It's all one perfectly calibrated flex of infinite intelligence, to itself, by itself, and for itself. You can't think your way into it. And you can’t think your way out of it. You are it. The only thing left to do it accept it. If you can. But it's so amazing that you can never truly accept because acceptance is only a thought. So in trying to accept, you may find love, joy, and peace. If you can't find it there, then surely, the only way to find it is by letting go. And perhaps to let go is what it really means to love. Today I learned that what I am is utterly unfuckwithable. I am literally infinite dreaming that just appears out of nowhere. These dreams are an eloquently designed, perfectly calibrated flex of infinite intelligence and love. I am experiencing the dreams while simultaneously creating these dreams on the fly through my will. All logical expiations utterly fail to encapsulate the essence of what I am. Words and logic are elementary school level means of understanding myself. The best way to know what I am is just to notice. I prefer to "think" in imagery combined with knowing or intuition. I can know things that I can't put into words. I can cling to any identity that I create within these dreams but at the end of the day, the identity is just a story, and a false one at that. My true identity is as slippery as a dream. Any time you choose one form or concept within the dream to be your identity, you create that story as if it were reality, or, you make believe play as this identity. When you identify with something, there's a lot of baggage that comes with that. First, the claim is false, so it's fundamentally unsustainable. So, in order to sustain that false story of identity, we have to play the game of maintaining that identity, or, survival. This game of survival once bought into, basically requires that you feel fear in order to maintain the belief. The longer you want to maintain the identity story, the more delusions you have to buy into. Over time, one original delusion of separation becomes twisted into a whole web of beliefs and concepts. As you accumulate these beliefs, you naturally buy into them more and more deeply and the fear necessarily becomes deeper and more complex to maintain such a complex false story. As you accumulate all of these delusions, you also create delusions of unworthiness, shame, guilt, apathy, and anger. We can also choose to go into a dream believing the false story to the point where we've completely forgotten who we actually are. At this point, breaking down this illusion becomes a process of remembering who you are. And who you are is not something that can be identified with. You are the dream, the dream experiencer, and the dream maker, and yet, these are just more concepts that utterly fail to encapsulate the infinite expanse that is you. 2/22/2021 Yesterday, I had the deepest awakening of my life. I became aware that everything within my awareness was made of an unfathomably intelligent material. Any surface I looked at was covered in these gorgeous, intricate mandala flower patterns. At one point I wasn’t sure if the patterns were actually there, meaning I wasn’t sure if other people could see them too. In truth, the patterns were there. They were as real as real gets. I could study them with close observation and the patterns did not waiver. However, reality is not defined by consensus, but rather, subjectivity. Each conscious being is one access point of this infinite source of intelligence. Each access point in connected to the whole and has their own unique reality which is not directly determined by consensus reality. Each being is living in their own dream, experiencing it while simultaneously creating it. Everything within my consciousness is literally me, the true me that is. Even "other people" are truly not other than me. They are simply me appearing in the form of a another person. Any pain I inflict on others, I am directly inflicting onto yourself. Any time I ignore others, I am ignoring myself. Any time I judge others, I judge myself. This not only goes for other conscious being but also for inanimate objects. Objects are equally a part of me as anything else. I am the entire field of consciousness. Anything that arises is me. There is nothing but me. I am everything I experience within this dream. I am the dream itself and I am the source of the dream. These identifications, of course, are not actually true because they are concepts or symbols. These words can point to but not encapsulate or even aptly describe what I actually am. What I am is constantly in flux through changing form yet at the same time is unwaveringly steady and ever-present. Anther concept which points to what I am is Infinite Dreaming. I am seemingly unlimited. As an unlimited creator, I seem to be able to impose limits upon myself as part of my limitless expression. In fact, creation fundamentally must be the expression of limits, without which, form would be undefined and therefore non-existent. Words began to feel very strange during this trip. Words (spoken and thought), or course, are symbols which point to some sort of experience. Even objects are experiences. For example, If I say the word, bread, I'm pointing to the experience of seeing, smelling, tasting, feeling, or hearing bread. Outside of these sensory experience of bread, the bread does not exist, so again, the word points to an experience. Seeing this, I started to think of words as "reality portals". By "going into" and word, you are giving reality to the experience to which the word points. That experience becomes your dream (reality). We can experience realities without using words but we cannot use words without "knowing" the experience to which the words point. If we don’t "know" an experience, which includes the experience of conceptualization, the words would be empty and meaningless. They would be pointing to something that doesn’t exist. From the human egoic level, we use these reality portals as a means of survival. For example, we might enter the reality portal of "should". This experience will create and experience of guilt and fear which will manipulate our behavior to better serve our survival needs. Simultaneously, from the perspective of '"god ego", which is a false conceptual identity designed to mimic True Self, these reality portals are more like games. Each experience is like a computer game which we run for the purpose of experiencing, itself. Words are like the app shortcut which we use to easily run these programs. I wouldn't call this a true ego death experience because I was still clinging to both human ego as well as god ego through the trip, however I felt like I could see through the false story of identification with a high degree of clarity, relative to previous awakening experiences. Thanks for reading!

Perhaps some of you can shed some light on this question. When we heal the wounded child aspect of ourselves who is selfish and narcissistic, who is basically SD stage red, can that aspect of ourselves evolve up the spiral? In other words, can we help specific parts of ourselves evolve their individual psychology? Or is it more about healing the fractures within our consciousness that caused these aspects to become individuated in the first place? Or is this relatively primitive selfishness inherent to the subconscious mind and something we must learn to live with? Would love to hear your thoughts.

I appreciate the feedback. This is the first of many experimental projects. I certainly won't be limiting my future projects to info products. But hey, gotta start somewhere!

One time, I smoked DMT inside a lucid dream and then I asked myself, "What is the dream world actually made of?" I remember picking up a basketball in my dream and asking "What is the actual substance of this basketball." It made sense that everything in the dream world, whether it’s a basketball, the ground, or my body, was made of the same substance, even though things appeared to be separate objects that were just as real as waking reality. Then, something clicked. I thought, "What if everything in waking reality is made of the same substance, just like in the dream world? And if that is the case, what might that substance be?" This allowed me to shift into holistic thinking with a deeper understanding of what my existential questions really mean.

What dreams do you have for your life other than the obvious self-evident ones we see played out through your work? What possible future vision of actualized.org currently excites you the most?

This course is for people who know they have the potential to live an extraordinary life but just can't seem to break free from old patterns like procrastination, addiction, negative thinking, and self-doubt. For the past 5 months, I've been working on a video course that's designed to help people transform and heal. This is my first major project after taking the Life Purpose Course, and I put over 300 hours of planning and writing into it. I put a lot of critical thought into understanding human beings and what it actually takes to transform in a sustainable and dare I say, effortless way. I really tried to dig down deep to understand the fundamental forces of our psychology in order to provide surgical solutions that will have a profound ripple effect in our lives. I've been watching Actualized.org for six years and a ton of inspiration for this project came from Leo's work, but the course is also full of original insights as well as lessons I pulled from other high-quality resources. I also developed an original healing technique that has helped me tremendously and has been the only technique, in my experience, to facilitate healing experiences comparable to psychedelics. This technique will be included in the course. If you've been doing personal development for a long time and are still struggling to get tangible results with basic things like distraction, addiction, health, and living in alignment with your purpose, this course is perfect for you. I am living and breathing every word in this course and although I'm still young and dumb, I am seeing a radical transformation happen before my eyes. I used to dream about living my purpose while distracting myself with YouTube, vaping, junk food, and weed. I felt disappointed, frustrated, anxious, and overwhelmed. Now, after a few months of applying the techniques in my course, I work on my purpose for hours every single day, I quit vaping, I am free from weed and YouTube addictions, I eat my ideal diet, and the negative emotional patterns have subsided dramatically. I am healing to my core and I want to share that gift with all of you beautiful people. The course will be totally free but I'm just looking for beta testers to try it out early and provide honest feedback so that I can improve it before the final release. I should have it ready for testing within the next week or two. So if you're interested in the course and want to find out more, leave a reply or DM me and I'll be in touch! If you're not sure if this course is for you, you can always just watch the intro video, where I break down more of what to expect and make a decision from there. Much love my friends, and thank you!

@bazera Just my perspective... indeed, you can fall into ideological traps when reading books, however, reading lots of diverse books is one of the best antidotes to paradigm lock. When you are exposed to hundreds or thousands of in-depth diverse perspectives, it becomes untenable to be trapped in a single ideology. If you read 40 books by the same author or even 40 books operating from the same paradigm or ideology, you're at great risk, even if you are relatively aware of the dangers of ideology. But when you study hundreds of diverse perspectives, you realize that there is some truth to all perspectives. You become a multi-perspectival thinker. In addition, books are so important because they shed light on your ignorance. You don't know what you don't know until learn it. When you learn something, ignorance turns into understanding. Darkness becomes light. The importance of reading books con only be truly understood from the perspective of having already read them. I'm sure you know that feeling of learning something extremely useful that changes the way you see reality and thinking "wow, I can't believe I lived my whole life without this knowledge. This is so important!" There's an infinite sea of books to explore, many with the potential to change your entire life. The more you read, the more you will want to read.

The natural awe and love we feel from beauty come from a deep recognition of God. Since God is all things, it includes aesthetic and every masterpiece. Absolute Beauty can indeed be found within these things just as it can be found within all things. However, people also tend to use aesthetics as a function of survival. For example, stage blue uses aesthetics to design churches and clergy uniforms to create a perception of holiness worthy of praise, worship, and faith. Stage orange will wear aesthetically pleasing outfits to make a good impression on people, or design aesthetically pleasing rooms and buildings to create an impression of professionalism, trust, or significance. Stage green may design an aesthetically pleasing healing center or therapy office to support client comfort and healing. Remember though, that even though we use beauty for survival, the essence of beauty cannot be separated from all that is. Hope this helps.

I was hoping you beautiful people could help me find a way to get accurate news. Social media seems like a poop flinging contest, and mainstream news is often myopic and focused on nonsense. I'm looking for major Global and U.S. news about politics, tech, physics, psychology, sociology, consciousness/spiritual science. What are your favorite sources? Thanks!

That's a great point. Instincts and "primitive" survival are deeply intelligent. And my body at stage purple felt loose, natural, and animalistic, reminding me of almost a mild mushroom trip. I didn't look too deeply into body awareness, but that certainly seems worth doing for all of the stages so I will try it. I haven't noticed the increased profundity of rituals in my direct awareness yet but one thing I did notice was the increased profundity of relationships. It's like having this great big family and talking to them, loving them, and sharing with them is the ultimate joy! It was quite beautiful and applicable

@SirVladimir That's a great idea, I'll definitely try beige next time

Last night, I intuitively did a visualization exercise where I imagined myself starting in a stage purple tribe, fully embodying my current imagined stage and it's values, living them out, realizing the limits of each stage, and evolving into the next stage. I did this for about an hour all the way through turquoise and spoke my thoughts out loud as if I was sort of explaining my thought process of justifying and eventually transcending each stage. When I was transitioning from yellow to turquoise and got a very intimate and emotional taste at the limits of mind activity and felt a deep desire to surrender to no mind. After spending a moment in stillness, a started to integrate turquoise thinking (this is all a miracle, there is no separation between this body and everything else, this is all a holographic creation from the infinite source, etc.) As I spoke these statements aloud I actually started to create a blissful spiritual experience. I pulled insight from previous enlightenment experiences and by pretending I was turquoise, I was actually able to embody turquoise for a while to at least some degree. I thought this was very valuable for me so I wanted to share it. If you're curious, give it a try! This practice transcends language and understanding because it is about direct experience rather than modeling.