ivankiss

Friendzone my ass

65 posts in this topic

5 hours ago, Schizophonia said:

@Lila9
There are a lot of Incels or insecure persons in general who “instinctively” become far right/masculinist/hard liberal or different blue or orange stage values in general.

I believe they are afraid of not being able to be loved in a world dominated by the green stage because they find themselves inside/outside too ugly, and think that their only way to receive love is through self-sacrifice, violence, straightness.

(without saying that the majority of people at these courses are like that, of course.)

When I was little I was traumatized by loneliness, family problems, bad bad company with me etc.  I liked the idea of being far right/in a religion because I finally felt like I was in some kind of power and uniqueness.  At the same time, the only way to approach other people and especially women was to talk nonsense and therefore pass myself off as a weird and dangerous guy.

 

I realized much later through psychedelics and honest introspection that it was because I considered myself too unlovable to just give love and try to create a normal relationship.

right on target. a perfect analysis

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11 hours ago, Gesundheit2 said:

That's not how I operate. Sexual interest leads to general interest, and general interest leads to sexual interest. I can't separate those two, and I don't think I should. Any girl I'm not interested in generally, I'm not interested in her sexually. And any girl I'm not interested in sexually, I'm not interested in her generally. I think that's how all people operate, even women.

No. It's you operate that and it's fine but not everybody is like that. 

11 hours ago, Gesundheit2 said:

The only reason people socialize is to gain some value, whatever that might be to them.

Yeah, there lots of values that people may gain in human interaction like emotional value (like feeling seen loved and appreciated), spiritual value (like a sense of connection, meaning or belonging), intelectuall value (exposing you to new povs, providing knowledge and wisdom, advice, intelectuall discussion) . Not every interaction of males and females is about gaining some materialistic or physical value like sex or favours.

11 hours ago, Gesundheit2 said:

The only scenario that I can be platonic with a woman is if I have a specific interest in her that is not sexual interest. Like for example, she is a good teacher, and I like her delivery. That's the value I'm getting, so I'm fine with being platonic. In fact, I want to be platonic, and if she would try to suggest something more, I would friendzone her, maybe even ghost her eventually.

I see, so after all you can appriciate women for giving you other values rather than sex.

11 hours ago, Gesundheit2 said:

Women benefit from these kinds of relationships a lot more than men do. They get free validation, ego boosts, physical and psychological and in some cases even financial support. Men on the other hand, we get all that from the sex. So basically, no sex, no value, no interest, no friendship.

Men also have emotional and spiritual needs. The belief that they are robots who need/care about sex only in the realm of human interaction is a toxic and false belief.

 

11 hours ago, Gesundheit2 said:

There are plenty of awkward males who are lonely and desperate (I've been one). Any male who is not awkward nor desperate would not tolerate having a woman in his life that he is interested in sexually but she is not. I don't have people in my life that I'm not interested in. Even my guy friends, they have something that interests me, even though it isn't sexual. It's usually something that I lack and they have, be it in personality or otherwise.

You don't have to tolerate relationship with a woman who is sexually not intrested in you while you do sexually intrested in her (and that's the only thing that you want from her.) You don't have to be in a relationship that doesn't give you what you need. You can move on without hating the person for not being able giving you what you need, and look for other people who will.

What is in your guy friends that make you intrested in them and why do you think that the value they give you is something that women can't give you?

Edited by Lila9
added more things that came to my mind after posting

Let Love In

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1 hour ago, Lila9 said:

What is in your guy friends that make you intrested in them and why do you think that the value they give you is something that women can't give you?

Actually now that I think about it, I'm not really interested in my guy friends either. I'm mostly just coping.

Thanks for the input, though. It was insightful and I have to contemplate it more.

Edited by Gesundheit2

Foolish until proven other-wise ;)

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On 2/24/2023 at 3:23 PM, Leo Gura said:

1) Guys get friendzoned because they haven't learned game. Once you learn game you will never be friendzoned.

2) It is possible for a guy to have girls as friends, but only if he has a girlfriend, not as some thirsty Incel.

fax

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On 2/25/2023 at 10:32 AM, Schizophonia said:

@Lila9
There are a lot of Incels or insecure persons in general who “instinctively” become far right/masculinist/hard liberal or different blue or orange stage values in general.

I believe they are afraid of not being able to be loved in a world dominated by the green stage because they find themselves inside/outside too ugly, and think that their only way to receive love is through self-sacrifice, violence, straightness.

(without saying that the majority of people at these courses are like that, of course.)

When I was little I was traumatized by loneliness, family problems, bad bad company with me etc.  I liked the idea of being far right/in a religion because I finally felt like I was in some kind of power and uniqueness.  At the same time, the only way to approach other people and especially women was to talk nonsense and therefore pass myself off as a weird and dangerous guy.

 

I realized much later through psychedelics and honest introspection that it was because I considered myself too unlovable to just give love and try to create a normal relationship.

Thank you for sharing your input. It's wonderful how psychedelics help with abandoning those kind of mindsets and awaken some people to green.

15 hours ago, Gesundheit2 said:

Actually now that I think about it, I'm not really interested in my guy friends either. I'm mostly just coping.

Thanks for the input, though. It was insightful and I have to contemplate it more.

No problem. Thank you for the discussion.   


Let Love In

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