What is the difference between suppressing and letting go?

[DefinitelyNotARobot]

Goes for both, thoughts and feelings, but I'll be talking about feelings because that's what I struggle with the most.

Whenever I try to let go of a feeling... It just feels wrong. Like I'm just trying to get rid of it  Like I'm trying to deny the truth. However, sometimes I can catch myself creating feeling and getting attached to it because letting go feels wrong. Like I'm being someone who I'm not and I just accept it because letting go somehow scares me, which is probably the fundamental problem. It feels like I'm trying to let go of my compass, eventhough I can feel that my compass is way off.

But I can't tell the difference between me actively running away and me letting go. It's weird because it blurs the lines between what's real and what isn't...

I can't tell who or what I am, between ego and intuition.

Hope someone can give me some advice! ✌

[nistake]

Try this on for size. As soon as you're aware of a thought/emotion, stop, relax your whole body and feel into it as much as you can. Don't make any stories about it (what's this emotion, where it came from, etc), just try to feel as if you tried to feel the sensations in your palm for example.

Do this until you feel the grip of the emotion starts to loosen up. If you think you're ready, take a deep breath and on the exhalation, imagine as if you're breathing out the emotion into the air.

[peanutspathtotruth]

I know this struggle, it can be tough at times.
In my experience, trying to let go doesn't work and can't work, and my approach changed a bit after banging my head against the wall over and over again. When it's really difficult, I try to observe things as closely, as directly as possible, without force but with curiosity. It's not really happening as thoughts so much, but orientation-wise, this is how a meditation can evolve for me when difficult feelings arise:

"I see there is this.. pain here. And I seem to not like it at all, I seem to want it to go away, heavily fighting. Interesting. Where is this I that doesn't like this feeling? .... Oh, I can't find it, as I never could before. It feels like I am my head, my body, but I am conscious of those sensations. I can't be what I'm aware of, or at least I can't be different from it then. Okay, the density fades away a bit now. But there is still resistance here and it feels painful - even if not to SOMEONE separate of the feeling, it is still here and it feels difficult. What can I do? Wait, who's asking this and why should there be done anything about the pain? Why don't I dive into the pain with a curiosity, and affirming love that it's okay for the pain to be here as long as it wants? It's what is real right now, so why don't I inquire into this feeling with an orientation of ease? It's all that is true in this instance, it is reality expressing itself. Why don't I let it be here fully and forget about all ideas that tell me this should not be here right now?"

And in that moment, the feeling can become much more intense still. But that doesn't matter anymore, because there is true surrender to what just is present in that moment - and sometimes this doesn't happen and fighting continues. Relaxation and observation of what your thoughts are telling you is the key. There is no "I" that decides to surrender, but when awareness sees itself fighting against itself, it naturally stops. You can only encourage that recognition. Hope that helps.

[TheSelf]

1 hour ago, DefinitelyNotARobot said:

Whenever I try to let go of a feeling... It just feels wrong.

let go of what ever you expect to feel after that also, if you don't, then it's suppression and not letting go.

1 hour ago, DefinitelyNotARobot said:

Like I'm just trying to get rid of it

don't feel or think that you are actually doing anything when you wanna let go, because you cant actually let go if not , and it creates tension in your mind.

1 hour ago, DefinitelyNotARobot said:

However, sometimes I can catch myself creating feeling and getting attached to it because letting go feels wrong

completely drop all you expectations when you wanna let go of something, expecting to feel not wrong is also wrong and something you wanna drop, just let go and be at peace not caring about it anymore!

1 hour ago, DefinitelyNotARobot said:

But I can't tell the difference between me actively running away and me letting go

to me letting go cannot be an act or doing! but actively running away is certainly doing. remember the times  when you were witnessing a beautiful sunset actually letting go of any thought process  and just observing a beautifully peaceful sunset, did you actually do something? no you just dropped all thought process and were enjoying a amazing lovely sunset at a very peaceful state, that was a true letting go. so just let go and be at peace.

Edited January 23, 2021 by m0hsen

[impulse9]

Trying to let go of a feeling is a feeling itself. Trying to let go of a thought is a thought itself. Funny conundrum.

[TheSelf]

3 minutes ago, impulse9 said:

Trying to let go of a feeling is a feeling itself. Trying to let go of a thought is a thought itself. Funny conundrum.

"Trying" can only be suppression and not letting go. if you actively think or feel that you are doing a letting go  when you are doing a letting go then you are actually not letting go ?

[Lyubov]

for me these two experiences are very different. suppression feels very heavy on the body. letting go is a clearing of sorts, a feeling of what is true. 

[Nahm]

 

The Judge Your Neighbor Worksheet,

Loving What Is

https://youtu.be/H5djjbj3UPU

https://youtu.be/khXHw5M-104

https://youtu.be/6rXhAUXdJwc

Ask & It Is Given

What is the difference between suppressing / letting go?  Stress / Peace.

[Carl-Richard]

For me, letting go is more like facing the reality of the situation while repression is more like turning away. Repression would be trying to resist the emotion. Letting go of an emotion would be letting go of trying to resist the emotion by letting it overtake you. Repression is about trying to gain control but not getting it. Letting go is about giving up control and then gaining it.

Edited January 23, 2021 by Carl-Richard

[Leo Gura]

Before letting go, you must fully FEEL it.

Invest a lot of time getting good at just FEELING stuff. Especially negative stuff.

Once you fully FEEL a thing, there's nothing left to suppress.

Also FEEL yourself avoiding the feeling of things

[Forestluv]

@DefinitelyNotARobot Breathwork is a great practice for allowing repressed feelings / memories / beliefs to arise. And then feeling / experiencing and then releasing / letting go. Ime, repressed feelings aren't released until they are felt / experienced. I can't think my way out of repressed feelings. 

[StarStruck]

Repression is usually an automatic behavior or a bad habit. There is little or no conscious effort required for you to run habits. Most of it is done in an unconscious feedback loop anyway.

Letting go is becoming aware of it, and creating options (different neural path ways), which will make you break the feedback loop aka bad habit of repression. It requires emotional labor.

I'm having trouble with this too. Especially when I'm  all up in my head, it is difficult to shut the thoughts out and use emotions to navigate the internal shit.

Edited January 23, 2021 by StarStruck

[Javfly33]

@Nahm A question. Isn't "dangerous" to feel shame? Since it seems feeling it can hurt you. Like...isn't the Shame feeling something "bad" for the mere fact you need to avoid feeling it because if you feel it it will hurt you?

Overall I think humans avoid feeling some things because we think that way we protect ourselves from feeling them (oh, another loop again Lol). But with shame particularly it's like it's stronger the need to avoid it 

 

Edited January 24, 2021 by Javfly33

[Breakingthewall]

59 minutes ago, Javfly33 said:

sn't the Shame feeling something "bad" for the mere fact you need to avoid feeling it because if you feel it it will hurt you?

shame is the fear of not being loved. when you move away from your being and turn towards the ego, the only available love comes from others, and this love-acceptance is conditioned. shame is the concealment of what would make us unworthy of being accepted, that is why it is such a strong feeling that it makes people false. Of course it hurts but it's very important to let it totally go. Exposure is the way imo. Repress the shame is the worst idea possible, only create more shame

Edited January 24, 2021 by Breakingthewall

[Nahm]

@Javfly33

Are you shame’s attorney or somethin? 

[Javfly33]

6 hours ago, Breakingthewall said:

. Of course it hurts but it's very important to let it totally go. Exposure is the way imo. Repress the shame is the worst idea possible, only create more shame

Ok, I will try a bit but I hope it doesn't hurt me a lot lol

@Nahm Haha lmao. I am protecting the shame , uh? 

[StarStruck]

Sometimes it is hard to see how suppressing works. The only way to find out is just by acting out on what you are suppressing or letting yourself trigger on purpose. People who are acting-out/overcompensating/counterattacking are better off  than people who are suppressing.

Edited January 24, 2021 by StarStruck

[Breakingthewall]

1 hour ago, Javfly33 said:

I will try a bit but I hope it doesn't hurt me a lot lol

I think you can't let go of shame feeling it. you have to understand the source of the shame. it is the strong certainty of being unworthy of love and acceptance. the ego in its purest form. It usually comes from childhood, parents showing you that their love is conditional on you meeting certain standards. It can also be created by other colleagues pointing out physical particularities, etc. This creates grassroots feelings of enormous strength as survival is at stake. There is a source of love that is available only by the fact of existing, that is beyond the ego, there we have to go, if not no matter how much we recreate ourselves in feeling shame, it will continue to flow, I know from experience, father with fascist ideas, etc, a big shit, but from On the other hand, since it is such a harmful feeling, a source of genuine suffering, it can be a motor that forces you to go beyond the ego. If fact maybe shame is not a feeling, it's more like fear, unacceptance, the big shit

Edited January 24, 2021 by Breakingthewall

[Javfly33]

3 hours ago, Breakingthewall said:

I think you can't let go of shame feeling it. you have to understand the source of the shame. it is the strong certainty of being unworthy of love and acceptance. the ego in its purest form. It usually comes from childhood, parents showing you that their love is conditional on you meeting certain standards. It can also be created by other colleagues pointing out physical particularities, etc. This creates grassroots feelings of enormous strength as survival is at stake. There is a source of love that is available only by the fact of existing, that is beyond the ego, there we have to go, if not no matter how much we recreate ourselves in feeling shame, it will continue to flow, I know from experience, father with fascist ideas, etc, a big shit, but from On the other hand, since it is such a harmful feeling, a source of genuine suffering, it can be a motor that forces you to go beyond the ego. If fact maybe shame is not a feeling, it's more like fear, unacceptance, the big shit

Totally agree. Btw I just had such a soul breaking 5-meo trip. It put me my shame/fear in front of me, it was so difficult to surrender to myself.

Accepting all parts of myself. That I should love myself because this is me.

My personal life is also loved by myself as god.

Only the ego has fear.

Thanks for the message man.

 

[Vibroverse]

Don't be in a hurry.