I'm 23 and I don't give a F*** about life purpose - yet its making me anxious

[Striving for more]

I currently don't give a flying f*** about life purpose... But this makes me feel really anxious and guilty. 

I feel like everyone's throwing it in my face " life purpose man you gotta find it blah blah" & it's tiring.

I have my basic needs to fulfil ; Health, social, financial & dating needs first. 

I just want to forget about life purpose at least until i'm 25, because i'd rather focus on just saving up money, developing my skills generally and learning how to attract women and learning social skills. 

I'm not saying life purpose isn't important, but surely not everyone is going to value life purpose equally, I personally right now would rather have good friends and better health without purpose

Is this foolish? Because I feel really guilty like everyone seems to preach life purpose and it just makes me feel more anxious.  

I know it's important but I honestly care a lot more about finding good friends and saving money working simple jobs and keeping life simple for now. 

[Preety_India]

Why can't life purpose fulfill your needs of health, social, dating and finance. 

I think you should kill 4 birds with one stone. One life purpose will cover all your needs. 

[Michal__]

27 minutes ago, Striving for more said:

I currently don't give a flying f*** about life purpose... But this makes me feel really anxious and guilty. 

I feel like everyone's throwing it in my face " life purpose man you gotta find it blah blah" & it's tiring.

I have my basic needs to fulfil ; Health, social, financial & dating needs first. 

I just want to forget about life purpose at least until i'm 25, because i'd rather focus on just saving up money, developing my skills generally and learning how to attract women and learning social skills. 

I'm not saying life purpose isn't important, but surely not everyone is going to value life purpose equally, I personally right now would rather have good friends and better health without purpose

Is this foolish? Because I feel really guilty like everyone seems to preach life purpose and it just makes me feel more anxious.  

I know it's important but I honestly care a lot more about finding good friends and saving money working simple jobs and keeping life simple for now. 

Obviously you should trust your own opinion more than what random people on the internet say.

If you still want to make some progress towards your LP while doing everything else you want to do you can just spend 30 minutes a day contemplating LP, that way it doesn't affect other aspects of your life in a bad way & you work towards making better decisions in the future.

[Striving for more]

@Leo Gura my bad, this thread should be in the life purpose section

[Rigel]

3 hours ago, Striving for more said:

But this makes me feel really anxious and guilty.

So you do give a f***.

LP could be a joy, a challenge or an adventure instead something that you SOULD or MUST do because somebody tells you to.

[JosephKnecht]

@Striving for more You obviously need to strive for something more than just bare survival.

But if you can't survive, how can you strive. 

You must strive while surviving.   

[TripleFly]

Yeah listen it makes sense, you're a little late bloomer, since by 24-25 you should already be set on some career and income. But there's people who don't even think about this stuff until 26-28.

[Strangeloop]

I'm on the same page with you OP. We just want a simple life, with no extravagenza. Although I don't think you contemplated any life purpose questions. Like What do I want to work as in my life? What do I want to achieve in life if anything? and etc.

P.s I haven't answered these either ??

[Striving for more]

@TripleFly Are you actually serious lol ? How the hell am I a late bloomer ? I'm 23 ...

Most people never think about this shit. Most people are stuck in poverty or mediocrity their whole life. Most people don't even know self help is a thing. 

[aurum]

13 hours ago, Striving for more said:

I currently don't give a flying f*** about life purpose... But this makes me feel really anxious and guilty. 

I feel like everyone's throwing it in my face " life purpose man you gotta find it blah blah" & it's tiring.

It certainly shouldn't feel forced. If you're happy doing what you're doing, great.

The problem I find is that if you don't consciously define your life purpose, someone else will.

In other words, your purpose is either conscious or unconscious. But you always are moving towards some kind of end goal.

It just so happens that most of the default purposes set up by society are really not working anymore. So people have to wake up and start carving out what they actually want.

For instance, a woman could unconsciously attach herself to the default programming of "my purpose is to be a mother". But is that all she wants? Could there be more? What's good about it? What problems are there?  Why does it exist at all?

These are the kind of questions people have to ask, lest they get sucked into something they don't actually want.

If life purpose sounds too stressful, consider asking yourself what living a truly authentic life FOR YOU means. And keep asking it until you really know.

[Arcangelo]

Yeah man don't get too hanged up on that life purpose BS. Wait until you are 41 like I did...

[Mu_]

17 hours ago, Striving for more said:

I currently don't give a flying f*** about life purpose... But this makes me feel really anxious and guilty. 

I feel like everyone's throwing it in my face " life purpose man you gotta find it blah blah" & it's tiring.

I have my basic needs to fulfil ; Health, social, financial & dating needs first. 

I just want to forget about life purpose at least until i'm 25, because i'd rather focus on just saving up money, developing my skills generally and learning how to attract women and learning social skills. 

I'm not saying life purpose isn't important, but surely not everyone is going to value life purpose equally, I personally right now would rather have good friends and better health without purpose

Is this foolish? Because I feel really guilty like everyone seems to preach life purpose and it just makes me feel more anxious.  

I know it's important but I honestly care a lot more about finding good friends and saving money working simple jobs and keeping life simple for now. 

Sounds like you know what you want, but your human conditioning around what other people think is having a strong effect on you (dont worry, it effects most).  Go for your desires, women, social skills, saving money, skills in general (all useful and worthwhile).

Generic life purpose is over rated and craving life purpose can be a grand source of suffering, with certain people telling others they should have one or individuals feeling like something is wrong with them because they don't have one or have one that doesn't line up with what their social circle/society is telling them is a good one or one that a Life Purpose is supposed to look like.

Godspeed, enjoy your life and remember to be kind along the way :).

[Byun Sean]

well then if you have made up your mind stop being anxious

[AlphaAbundance]

@Striving for more

Do whatever the fuck you want

Fuck shoulds

Life purpose seems to be a higher need, most people have no real business seeking this without their base needs to be met

By this logic, follow what you want and eventually (accordingly to these ideas) a life purpose, desire for life purpose will come

There are two things

• What is best
• What you want

However, you would want to still keep in mind what is best, like do what you want (as long as it aligns (or is acceptable) within the best life, like don't go do hardcore drugs or something that will fuck up your life, do what you want in the shorter term while being considerate of what is best / what you would want in the long-term)

Generally, it seems these will eventually come to be congruent (just like what is selfish and selfless seem to eventually come to be congruent), so by that logic follow what you want and it will eventually be what is best

This idea of multiple birds with one stone seems ideal but in practice may not be the case

Are you really going to get better at getting laid while focusing on your purpose? Indirectly maybe but Nah bruh it may be faster to just focus directly on those goals

Are you really going to become financially free while focusing on your purpose? In the long run maybe but it would probably be faster to just focus directly on those goals

Then again do you really want to force yourself to desire life purpose? Why not just follow what you want with the knowledge that in the future you may want to pursue a life purpose

Later, this may even give you the full devotion to following what you want with no distractions as you already solved most everything else

Just some ideas

Edited December 2, 2020 by AlphaAbundance

[Jacob Morres]

Good question I've had similar thoughts of the year

Like... what the fuck is the point of life purpose, the hell is Leo raving about that shit?

I just wanna have some good friends, get some girls, and have fun. 

I think life purpose is for when you want something more out of life. You want it to have some higher purpose and meaning. I think it comes when you are ready for something big and extravagant.

I don't think life purpose is for everyone, you need to be ripe for it. But it does give your life meaning and fulfillment 

The other stuff, won't give you as much fulfillment. And then you will search for a life purpose. Something deeply meaningful and important 

 

@AlphaAbundance

I like when you said LP is a higher need. Yeah me too. I think for me, LP becomes much less important when some basic needs are not met. Really, those becoming burning fires in your mind if you dont meet them (for me) 

 

 

Edited December 3, 2020 by Jacob Morres

[Striving for more]

Yes You are all confirming what I suspected to be true. Thank you. 

I have to conquer my basic needs first. Then I can move on to life purpose. 

I do believe doing pickup can coincide with life purpose. 

But none of this stuff is even possible without basic mental & biological health, if I got cognition problems and chronic fatigue. 

Also really helps to be in a good city / environment that is nourishing, social, and has more nature and beauty. 

Therefore I am saving up to move country too, essential part of the journey.

Time to get on with stuff, fuck anxiety, fuck being a lose I'm here to  win this game called life. 

 

P.s I really want to change my name ; it sucks, so uncreative and boring 

[Striving for more]

@Byun Sean 

I think anxious was the wrong word here. I mean more perfectionistic OCD thoughts. But you are right, no reason to overthink

[Michal__]

27 minutes ago, Striving for more said:

Yes You are all confirming what I suspected to be true. Thank you. 

I have to conquer my basic needs first. Then I can move on to life purpose. 

I do believe doing pickup can coincide with life purpose. 

But none of this stuff is even possible without basic mental & biological health, if I got cognition problems and chronic fatigue. 

Also really helps to be in a good city / environment that is nourishing, social, and has more nature and beauty. 

Therefore I am saving up to move country too, essential part of the journey.

Time to get on with stuff, fuck anxiety, fuck being a lose I'm here to  win this game called life. 

 

P.s I really want to change my name ; it sucks, so uncreative and boring 

Search Leo's advice on heavy metals detox and consider it.

Get on some adaptogenic herbs. Namely rhodiola rosea in the morning/during the day & ashwagandha before sleep.

Clean up your diet. Doesn't have to be complicated, just eat whole foods that you make yourself & follow common sense. It wouldn't hurt to read a book or two about healthy food though.

Get a reverse osmosis water filter.

That should do wonders for your energy levels & allow you to be way more effective.

Edited December 3, 2020 by Michal__