No Action Whatsoever

[Socrates]

After watching the video on OneNote, starting writing some stuff and contemplating about my life, I realized where I've been doing well and where I am not.

I realized how little action I actually take.

I am just observing here so don't get lost assuming stuff. Here are some things that "go wrong" with me and need to be fixed asap:

• Apart from my formal/walk meditation habit which is pretty consistent, I dabble around in everything else. 
• I protect my ego toooooo much, my cool-smart-wise-funny guy image/identity.
• No morning routine, no productivity (currently unemployed living with parents).
• "Stuck" on LP course since I don't know what  domain of mastery and ideal medium to choose (more like an excuse but whatever makes me sleep at night, right?)
• Waste too much time on PC and personal development material when I could be taking action.
• No structure whatsoever in my daily life. 
• No quality peer group to push me as I wish to be pushed.
• Being into PUA theory for months now and the only action I have taken is going to a bar and chatting up dudes (not awkward just pussied out I guess)
• Stuck for literally months in this theory filled and no action comfort zone that I went myopic without noticing.
• No system in place to autocorrect my stupid behavior in the path of growth and self-improvement without going unconscious for months.

Not writing this to victimize myself or anything. I've got the mental game in place.

I just really need something tangible to grab on to and get out of this rut.

The funny thing is I already got the knowledge to get started but a second opinion would be much appreciated   

 

 

 

 

Edited November 13, 2017 by Socrates

[Zephyr]

 

Just Do it ✔

[Spiral]

@Socrates I think this one of the biggest problems in this field, if not the biggest.

[Steph1988]

I had this problem for the longest time, i drowned in comfort and i could not really solve it for myself at home with my parents and just take up a routine.

So i took another job besides the one i had and working 2 jobs i could afford a house finally for myself and that might be a game changer because i notice when i'm not around my parents i'm far less stifled with everything/way more disciplined and i have no idea of how that works, i don't know the psychology behind it but it seems for me the only thing that worked.

So maybe just try to pick up a job and one that is a little bit challenging but one that doesn't require you to make a career out of it, i took up working in kitchens/butchershops, delivering newspapers, carrying stones in construction work, playing guitar in a band. and it at least puts me into motion and it all contributed to moving out my parents house.

If you can't do it all by yourself just throw yourself into something that kinda forces you into a routine and combine it with a minimalist lifestyle so you have enough money to be relatively free, it is the best i can come up with and i wish i knew this at age 16 instead of 29.

[stevegan928]

What I'm currently doing is adding 1 new positive lifestyle change every month, either a new change or added meditation time. First month 10 minutes meditation 2nd month clean up diet more, 3rd month concentration, 4th month add more meditation, ect. I always saw this approach as unmotivating because when I think of PD I think of being on an epic hero's journey where I'm constantly pushing myself, so the idea of sticking to small incremental changes over time just bores me. But my approach to fixing this was to not to look at my new schedule as set in stone, but rather a safety net of sorts, to assure myself that over time I'm at the very least growing little by little and not regressing. If I want to go all In and meditate for 6 hours in a day I'm free to do that, but that's not my commitment right now. Right now my commitment Is to follow the schedule I laid out and continue following it. I also made each proceeding year more challenging to assure I'll start really digging deep when the time comes. 

[RossE]

@Socrates I'm in a similar situation to you except I have no real desire to implement new PD habits.

I'm not sure having a daily routine is all that important - why do you feel the need for it?

What do you hope to do to earn a living? Run a business? Get a job for a charity or company or business? Online?

I'm generally for a minimalist lifestyle but being busy can get you perspective on all the free time you have and what you dedicate it to.

[Leo Gura]

@Socrates Good! That's progress.

Sitting around mentally-masturbating has its uses. Eventually it leads to you saying, "Fuck this! I need to start taking action!"

And in this way, the journey begins.

Don't expect your journey to be highly efficient. Many of the inefficiencies are required to get your emotional system bought into taking action. The suffering and backsliding is often mandatory. Fuckups are the best teacher. There is nothing quite like wasting 3 years of your life to get you motivated.

[d0ornokey]

2 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

There is nothing quite like wasting 3 years of your life to get you motivated.

holy fuck please let this not be me 

[Leo Gura]

11 minutes ago, d0ornokey said:

holy fuck please let this not be me 

For you, it may be 10 years

[Leo Gura]

1 hour ago, blazed said:

in fact she thinks im wasting time with self development and enlightenment when I should just be doing my work. She's done 0 self development work.

She will pay the cost for that for the rest of her life though.

Personal development is a long-term investment. Yes, to onlookers it will at first seem like you're wasting your time. Until years later when your entire relationship to life has been transformed and you're chill as a cucumber, meanwhile they are stuck with all their old neurosis, their life full of suffering and drama.

Of course if you focus only on work, you will get more work done. But work never ends. You are a hamster spinning in a wheel.

[Metody]

Hmm personal development vs only hard work. Here a good quote about this ; 

"Give me six hours to chop down a tree and I will spend the first four sharpening the axe." - Abraham Lincoln 

Edited November 15, 2017 by Metody

[ajasatya]

@Socrates dude, i've been working on my projects for 14+ hours/day everyday for the past week.

WAKE UP. y u no make impakt?

Edited November 15, 2017 by ajasatya

[Zane]

@Socrates I'm glad you're aware of your struggle with taking action! To me totally honest, I've been in that position for a couple years but now I'm making some of the biggest changes in my life by moving to a whole new state and city and totally re-adjusting and re-creating my life and now i'm going through a major career transition but I'm using job resources and focusing on a solution and managing the stress and anxiety of the uncertainity. Ruts can feel deeply frustrating especially when you're feeling deep uncertainity about your identity or your future. I realize that massive action can take place during a period of inner urgency. I created my Twenties Journal when I realized how detached i was from myself, people, and life and that resulted in new hobbies, new experiences, new friends, and creating new possibilities. I notice that concrete plans and follow through and a sense of urgency makes taking action less daunting. Action taking is daunting but it's possible! Without a plan or any inner grounding, you're just drifting. I've been through existential crises involving identity and my future but I've learned how to not just deal with it but have freedom over the situation. Regarding my struggling in college, I got to work with an academic coach and focused on mental health and inner peace and finishing college and becoming more happier and more passionate about life. Now, i'm in a fourth existential crisis of transition to living on my own but I'm focusing on getting the help I need, taking the action i need to, but also focusing on new opportunities, breaking out of my comfort zone, and focusing on finding joy in life. 

Edited November 15, 2017 by Zane

[Quader]

@Zane

I've started my journal (using onenote) and I must say it's made a huge difference. For a while I thought I had to be intuitively capable of always knowing what to do next.. taking notes properly is probably the best form of "mantra" building so-to-speak (purpose remembrance/recall).

Plus I was chronically smoking weed (and tobacco) so that tanks short term memory retention.. 

Edited November 15, 2017 by Quader
Broken @ link

[HII]

@Socrates So what has your post lead to so far? Have you set a tangible goal, did you take action to work towards it?

[Socrates]

@Leo Gura Is accumulating Personal development theory actually a waste of time though?

If it is, I theoretically have wasted the last 4 years but If I didn't I wouldn't be on the self-actualization journey so I am ok with that.

My perfectionism wakes up towards action, what job to find? Is it a waste of time? Should I go pimp it solo again? 

And especially without a quality peer group, i have to be extremely self-reliant.

My mind plays tricks on me... My emotional system is not backing me up and the only thing I have left is willpower.

@RossE Daily routine is an idea to maximize productivity. The last months I have been running on open schedule and the results are self-evident.  

@HII Put down some goals (Both long-term and short-term) on my OneNote, now trying to convince myself how to proceed from here.

[Shin]

@Socrates Your situation looks like mine. The only major difference is that I'm at peace about it.

You may think it's a bad thing, but actually it's this peace that allow me to take the right actions and actually change for the better.
It's only been 1 year but so much has changed internally, yes from an external point of view it seems nothing has changed (except my mood), but if I had the choice to choose between all the personal developement skills in the world + 10 billions dollars, and internal peace, I would choose peace.

Yes at some point you will need a better structure in your life, and you will have to drop some habits that takes too much time (maybe you need to do some of those things now) but what's more important above all is to chill your mind and starting to becoming one with life.
From this state you will take the right action anyways, and even when you backslide (which almost always happen), you will just laugh at it and still keep going.

Your main focus should always be to be conscious and to live in the present, it's the only way to appreciate life and doing real personal developement work. 
If you don't, then you'll tailchase some fake dream, learning and becoming good at something useless for what you genuinely wants to do.
Or worse, not having any dream and just becoming the "perfect guy", for the sole reason to be the best and have all the success/money/girls.

Most problems become non-issues when you get past the mind, so what you should do if you want real progress, is to do MORE spiritual "work", and less traditional personal developement, because not only most of them are about fixing some imaginary problems/fake goals but they just make you inconscious and way too much focused on them.
If you can overcome the compulsive desire to think, then everything else becomes easy, and you will start to get some really juicy intuitions about what you really wants to do, instead of what your mind tells you to do.
 

[Nahm]

@Socrates everything resets in our sleep. When you wake up tomorrow, sit for a few minutes, YouTube “motivation”. Just sit and listen for a while. Let yourself be tuned.  Then listen to your jams and exercise, then meditate. Do this every morning without spending any of your day worrying about doing more. Get your body awake and feeling loved, that get’s your brain clear and feeling loved. The rest will begin to happen very easily. Oh ya, eat healthy to. If you don’t already, don’t sweat it! It will come naturally after a few days.  Watch healthy food documentary’s. This is all easier than you think. Don’t take it all on at once as if you could. Build the pyramid and be patient with it. Sleep, food, exercise, meditation, healthy eating....CONNECTION!....then self inquiry, art, love, art, appreciation, art, LIFE becomes your ART.  Your absolute honest self inquiry becomes your art! It is a never ending resource. 

[RossE]

@Socrates Fair enough. Getting basics down like waking time, going to sleep time, meal times, morning routine and having a time for meditation could be very helpful.

I think you need a compelling vision of what you want your life to be about, what you want to look back and be grateful for, what do you want to do in this world. Vision can really drive you forward when you're doing some menial task you can't be assed doing, meditating, when you feel stuck in a plateau. The vision can really put any daily struggle you have into perspective. Sounds like that might be what you need right now.

[HII]

1 hour ago, Socrates said:

Put down some goals (Both long-term and short-term) on my OneNote, now trying to convince myself how to proceed from here.

Can you write down some of the goals here? Have you still not taken a single action on any of them after four days?