Should you share your emotions with a women?

[UpperMaster]

Is sharing emotions a turnoff, one of my friends has this as a number 1 rule. He says all women say they love when a man is emotional, but this is a HUGE trap.

Is this true?

Edited 10 hours ago by UpperMaster

[Valach]

Of course you can.

But the more important question is. What do YOU want to share with the woman you are talking to? Not what you need to share to get some sort of positive reaction or avoid negative one.

Edited 10 hours ago by Valach

[Natasha Tori Maru]

Yes. As a woman I have no issue with a man feeling the need to open up in any sort of vulnerable capacity.

Any women who cannot hold space and support their man in this way is simply immature.

[thierry]

39 minutes ago, UpperMaster said:

Is sharing emotions a turnoff, one of my friends has this as a number 1 rule. He says all women say they love when a man is emotional, but this is a HUGE trap.

Is this true?

It's just a question of timing. Once you had lots of sex and she's attached, share deep emotions and vulnerability, she'll love it but in the beginning, playfulness, confidence, humor, light atmosphere are kings.

[theleelajoker]

54 minutes ago, UpperMaster said:

Is sharing emotions a turnoff, one of my friends has this as a number 1 rule. He says all women say they love when a man is emotional, but this is a HUGE trap.

Is this true?

IMO: These absolute rules, dogmatic and strategic behavioral guidelines, yes/no questions are one one the biggest mindfucks in the history of mankind. The answer is so obvious I can't believe you even ask this.

But to answer the question: yes it's an incredible turn off, but only when the moon is in Saturn, when it's between 6:44 am and 8:54 pm, and only if the woman in case did wear a red shirt OR jacket within the last 4 and 2/5 days, and only is the range of your emotional intensity is bigger than 5/10 but not smaller than 2/10.

It's an incredible turn on of the women did wear black or orange shoes OR green ear rings within the last 72.75 hours, if you jerked off at least once this day, if the moon is less then 3/4 full, if you ate between 1-3 croissant in the morning, at least one of those with Nutella. Watch out, if you put butter with Nutella, the croissant counts double. 

They should teach this in school.  Seriously, not your fault for not knowing this.

[thierry]

3 hours ago, theleelajoker said:

IMO: These absolute rules, dogmatic and strategic behavioral guidelines, yes/no questions are one one the biggest mindfucks in the history of mankind. The answer is so obvious I can't believe you even ask this.

But to answer the question: yes it's an incredible turn off, but only when the moon is in Saturn, when it's between 6:44 am and 8:54 pm, and only if the woman in case did wear a red shirt OR jacket within the last 4 and 2/5 days, and only is the range of your emotional intensity is bigger than 5/10 but not smaller than 2/10.

It's an incredible turn on of the women did wear black or orange shoes OR green ear rings within the last 72.75 hours, if you jerked off at least once this day, if the moon is less then 3/4 full, if you ate between 1-3 croissant in the morning, at least one of those with Nutella. Watch out, if you put butter with Nutella, the croissant counts double. 

They should teach this in school.  Seriously, not your fault for not knowing this.

Taking notes

[something_else]

Yes, you should. Vulnerability from a place of strength is hot.

Nobody likes people who make all of their problems yours, but if you show insight and self awareness into your own weaknesses and problems without directly putting them onto her to solve, she will appreciate that a lot and probably support you.

[integral]

5 hours ago, UpperMaster said:

Is sharing emotions a turnoff, one of my friends has this as a number 1 rule. He says all women say they love when a man is emotional, but this is a HUGE trap.

Is this true?

It depends the woman.

MOST people are unstable, there highly effected by the way the wind blows and the weather. They have no room for your emotions and what they seek from you is stability, they want good vibes to boost and keep them steady along the right course. They outsourced there mood to others.

So no in general you gf is not your psychologist and you would be wise not to use her as one.

People want you to stabilize them not the other way around.

If you need help emotionally you need to go inward and sit with it, seek truth. Others will only feed your corruption.

Do not seek anything from the corrupt.

Edited 5 hours ago by integral

[theleelajoker]

3 hours ago, thierry said:

Taking notes

Yes let me know what you find! Some people say you can exchange the Nutella with any other chocolaty-hazelnut creme, but I disagree. 

[bazera]

7 hours ago, UpperMaster said:

He says all women say they love when a man is emotional, but this is a HUGE trap.

My ex was complaining that I wasn't emotional enough and wasn't sharing my emotions to the degree she wanted.

I think if you feel a need to do it, you should, not out of some requirenment that you read somewhere, or just because girls asks you to. Just be genuine, and see where that takes you. 

Of couse if you act like a cry baby, complaining, whining and being emotional daily to her, that might become a turn off.

Find a masculine ground if you are leaning more into it, but also find ways to integrate the feminine. Being vulnurable and emotional from time to time can be okay and deepen intimacy I think.

[theleelajoker]

2 hours ago, integral said:

It depends the woman.

YES. I want to add: Depends on the moment, too. 

2 hours ago, integral said:

MOST people are unstable, there highly effected by the way the wind blows and the weather. They have no room for your emotions and what they seek from you is stability, they want good vibes to boost and keep them steady along the right course. They outsourced there mood to others.

So no in general you gf is not your psychologist and you would be wise not to use her as one.

People want you to stabilize them not the other way around.

Yes in a sense of "fits my experience of reality". Have recently met a girl, the first criterion she named was indeed stability. Not looks, not money, not status. "He knows who he is and he's stable, he knows how to regulate himself". 

Have many other examples from other contexts that support integral's statement.

2 hours ago, integral said:

If you need help emotionally you need to go inward and sit with it, seek truth. Others will only feed your corruption.

Do not seek anything from the corrupt.

Too harsh IMO. It all depends. HOW you do it is IME much more important then what. There is something inside that nothing from the outside can give you, yes. 

BUT: There is something you can get from connection with others that simply cannot come from within. And emotions are part of this. IME the problem is never showing emotions or feeling them. Nobody wants to live with, or communicate, or even fuck with a block of ice, right? Emotions are fine.  It is how you handle it, how you do it, what you do with it.

As a rule of thumb: Women have been able to handle my emotions to the degree they can handle their own. I have been able to handle the emotions of others to the degree that I have faced my own. 

I swear, I have worked in some projects where my main value added was to just remain calm and even keeled in times of turmoil.  Coming back to @integral above - "good vibes to boost and keep them steady along the right course" - I'm learning that I can make good money just providing this in combination with some consulting 1&1, good communication and genuinely caring. Seeing the strengths and skills in other people and helping them to make use of them, overcoming their fears.

Edited 2 hours ago by theleelajoker

[integral]

34 minutes ago, theleelajoker said:

There is something you can get from connection with others that simply cannot come from within.

It depends who you are and how big the social domain is to your values, personally i have had so little success getting anything from people that i was forced to take responsibility for getings my needs met from within.

Relationship are hard, harder then anyone thinks, its best to try to get as few needs met from the relationship as possible, not to source it from there.

Half the time youll be setting boundaries witch will be hard enough as it is, forget the other side of the coin. lol

But of course it depends, if you date someone mature then go right away and trauma dump, see were that gets you. 😂

34 minutes ago, theleelajoker said:

"good vibes to boost and keep them steady along the right course" - I'm learning that I can make good money just providing this in combination with some consulting 1&1, good communication and genuinely caring. Seeing the strengths and skills in other people and helping them to make use of them, overcoming their fears.

Of course! thats why we have social media, vibes = attention = money = ...

A dog survives on pure vibes, the ultimate survival strategy.  lol

---

On the point of corruption, people are so desperate for love they will seek it anywere, and they find them selves seeking it from cigarets, what you expect love from the ceo of a cigaret company? NO so why are you smoking?

People are lost and conformist, seeking love in corruption, with no idea what they are actually looking for.

In relationships or anything related to the social domain the psychopath dominates because they have no interest in getting there needs met from people. They understand the corruption game to the core so of course your not going to get anything from other corrupt leaches.

A psychopath looks at you like your leech (corrupt). So they figure out the best strategy to extract maximum value from you for there benefit.

Normies dont think this way, so they have terrible strategy and get terrible results.

Your better off looking at your gf like shes a dementor. lmao Youll at least have a sober strategy of how to operate. 

Edited 2 hours ago by integral

[manuel bon]

I am proud of being an emotional man, and fully open about it

[UnbornTao]

Why not?

And sometimes the emotions show themselves, so to speak.

[theleelajoker]

@integral

Mixed feelings when I read your last post.

One the one hand, it feels to me you have gained true perspective on some stuff. 

On the other hand, it seems that because of the experiences you mention with people in the past, you're filtering reality too much through a negative lense re people and relationships.

You are right, relationships are not easy, there's a lot of boundary setting non-stop, etc etc. Just the way you say it, feels a bit too negative, too biased to me, you know?

There's also the fun side. Getting to know each other, the shifting of boundaries, the freedom of release of inner limits, oxitocyn and all the other nice stuff you can from any kind of relationship. 

You see leeches, I see fear. And I see fun in overcoming these fears

Edited 1 hour ago by theleelajoker

[Leo Gura]

A former girlfriend asked me to be more vulnerable with her. I was too stoic for her liking.

Without vulnerability it is hard for her to fall in love with you. It gives her nothing to latch onto, like climbing a glass wall.

Vulernability creates intimacy which women crave.

This is different from being an emotional mess.

Women like playing the supportive role to her man. She actually needs you to create that role for her, otherwise she feels useless.

Edited 53 minutes ago by Leo Gura

[cistanche_enjoyer]

I think it depends on the type of vulnerability you show her.

For example, if you’re vulnerable about your insecurities / self-deprecation, and fishing for compliments, that would be a huge turn-off, even if that’s exactly what you’re experiencing.

Or for example oversharing traumas too early in a relationship is not good.

[Hojo]

You can do it a little  but if you do it more than her she will think you are a wussy and will start making fun of you.

Edited 4 minutes ago by Hojo