Snader

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  1. Human life consists of infinite amount of factors, but the amount of factors that are relevant to ‘’ordinary life’’ and the common sense of personality is pretty limited. That’s what those tests assume as well. If you live (or forcefully try to live) very unordinary life where you are detached from basic life factors, such as money, relationships, work, etc., then those tests might not serve you very well. But if you proactively operate in the ordinary realm, then those test can give you great insight, because they seem to include those factors in their theory quite well. CIA might not use that model to find out what a monk meditating in Himalayas is up to, because he is out of the reach of fundamentals of ''ordinary life'', whereas a common citizen is not. MBTI doesn’t go super deep, but it goes deep enough and include nuance enough to guide you with the fundamentals of your life. If you are wise enough to see its limits, I think it serves you really well, no matter what personality type you are. If you try to use it to make sense of everything that’s going on inside your head, you’ll just end up hitting your head against a wall. For example, the model shines light to some personal development concepts and ideas Leo talks about. It gives perspective to why having a life purpose is hard for some while it's easier and even a no-brainer to others. Or how it’s easier for some to not give a fuck what others think of you, while the idea of that seems impossible to others. It never gives you the whole truth, but it might give enough for you to live more authentic life and deal with many challenges on the way.
  2. Deep breathing throughout the day is said to move sexual energy in your body, so that it doesn't get stuck in the genital area or your head. Might sound like woo-woo, but give it a shot. Deep, proper, regular breathing has had an enormous effect not only to my sexual urges and performance, but also to my ability to be present and generally out of my head. Dedicate 5-10 minutes 3 times a day to just breathing. Sit down, set a timer and just focus on deep breathing. First, inhale deeply into your belly, from lower to upper belly, then to your solar plexus and finally to your lower and upper chest. Exhale slowly and fully. Make this a full smooth movement that you keep repeating. You can practise this throughout the day whenever you catch your breath shallow. You can really do it anywhere while doing pretty much anything. Try that for a few weeks and see if it works for you. Besides that as a general advice, having something to do and something to proactively put your energy into usually makes a big difference. That way your mind simply has no time to dwell in the sea of sexual fantasy.
  3. Just a heads up for the future. Hard to say. There are a lot in between those two ends (wanting a serious relationship and wanting a fuck buddy). He might still just want to get to know you better. Chances are that he has a sexual agenda, but it doesn't necessarily mean that he only wants sex from you and that he's a ''fuckboy''. Go see him and see what happens. There's really nothing to lose. In the worst case you get some good sex and the information you need about him.
  4. He probably just needs time to even consider the possibility of serious relationship. He might want to get to know you better first. If he gets the vibes that you're ready to commit to him even before you really know him, he might not consider you very high quality woman. Try not to be too pushy about your agenda, or you might scare him away.
  5. I can relate. The 3g seems to be such a doorway for me too. For me, changing the set and settings have seemed to be the key to preventing that chaotic anxiety from kicking in. If you have the opportunity, I would encourage you to try tripping in a peaceful and remote place, in a place where you have minimum amount of those possible threads, that might lead you to that awful loop. Those threads could be stuff that remind you of your ''normal'' ''civilised'' human life, such as your phone, or just the basic surroundings of where you spend the most of your time anyway. Some grounding work to detach you from everyday activities and obligations a day before a trip is also big. It would be great to have some room to become a bit ''crazy'', with nothing there to remind you of how relatively ''bad'' it is. By eliminating most of those threads or distractions, it becomes easier to accept the mindfuckery, that would otherwise work against you by twisting your mind.
  6. Don't flush the sad feelings down the toilet. feel into them. Feel them completely. Let yourself be emotional. It's hard for few weeks, but those feelings will morph into strength and become an asset for your spiritual journey. Those feelings are there to heal you.
  7. New euphoric experiences through deep sexual intimacy. Yeah, sounds like there is a new door in the world of sexuality slowly opening for you.
  8. That sounds like you're hitting the Walls of your current sex paradigm. There's much more to sexuality than rubbing genitals together. You're probably not getting over sexual desire any time soon.
  9. So many red flags that I would just leave while it's still relatively easy. Doesn't sound like it's just trauma, there is probably something else going on with her. Maybe sit down with her and make her open up. If she's not willing to, I would just dumb her ass. Even if it's trauma, it must be processed between you two, at least to some degree, if a healthy relationship is what you're aiming to.
  10. No need to feel bad, you take action and now you ask for some feedback. You are totally on the right rail man, great work! Some girls are simply shy and some like to play hard to get. In many cases physical escalation works, but even before that you should lower the bar when it comes to talking. Keep bombing words at her, you can talk about the breakfast you ate this morning or the taste of your toothpaste, the content is irrelevant. Don't be so scared to say something stupid, if she's attracted to you, it's hard to say something she would think is stupid, and even if you do, you can laugh at yourself and not take it too seriously. If she rejects you for something silly you said, then she's not a girl to put effort on. Also, what's the worst that could happen? You lose her. So what? Then you move on. With some girls it takes some time to build enough trust for them to be more open. It's up to you to decide whether she's worth all that work. If she doesn't start opening after few dates, then it's probably smart to let her go and move on. Get into dates with mastery mindset. See it as another step towards becoming great with woman, as a practise to become better socially. Every date will make you better one by one. When you learn to be more chill and detached from the outcome, it becomes fun to go out and socialise. That's why lowering the bar is crucial.
  11. It's great if you can discipline yourself to follow habits of slowly improving yourself in multiple aspects, but better be careful, cause you're prone to burnout there. You can try to juggle with 10 balls, but be wise enough to come down when it feels too much. It's surprising how much it takes energy when actively doing hard work on something, even though you calculate you have enough hours for it all. I prefer quality over quantity and baby-step approach over everything fast. If you get too tired it starts eating from your ability to improve. Get to work and keep making adjustments.
  12. This one below is pretty dope for vegan dishes, for every meal of the day. Those recipes are super balanced with protein and everything. They are also mostly very easy and quick to make. The instructions are very clear and on every recipe it tells you how much time it takes to prepare it. The book also has a grest preface and some nice sections about nutrition info. It’s a really well stuctured cookbook. It's funny how I stumbled upon that book. I was in the middle of a week long water fast, when my friend came to show me some new books he had ordered and had just arrived. This one was one of them and I was naive enough to take a look. I kept fantasising about those meals for the rest of the fast
  13. Depending on quick fixes rather than working on the root problem/(s)
  14. ''If people knew how hard I worked to get my mastery, it wouldn't seem so wonderful at all.'' -Michelangelo Of course it's not easy to pursue something so hard, but that's why finding out your personal values and strengths, creating a purpose based on them, and aligning your life with that, is so powerful. That will evoke a deeper inner power that all of those people you mentioned had. Some will have that much easier than others. Some will have good parenting or guidance to help them do that, some will find that by luck, some of us need to take more responsibility and build that by ourselves through inner work.