witpo44

I need some feedback on the awakening process?

39 posts in this topic

16 hours ago, witpo44 said:

 I considered the possibility that I’m deluding myself. 

Yes we all are, the difference is awakened people consciously choose their dillusions. It's called lucid living (instead of lucid dreaming).

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18 hours ago, Breakingthewall said:

It is inevitable to want to understand, and non-conceptual understanding is possible, but I believe that we must forget conceptual understanding because it is misleading, it creates structures, we must be able to forget the need to understand and just open up, and sometimes non-conceptual understanding occurs.  

It is important to understand the structures, how we create the mental bubble, but the understanding of reality, why this experience is like that, if others exist and how, etc., well, better be skeptical, it is unnecessary to understand that, the important is the opening

Thanks for the clarification and i do agree. Somethings better left a mystery and need no understanding but certain things it's probably wise to atleast try because thats a part of knowing thyself.


Thought = Time. Without thought there's no time. Death is the end of the illusion.

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6 hours ago, Breakingthewall said:

it is difficult to find people interested in spirituality.

This is not even necessary. Being connected with Source, everything becomes Spiritual, with a capital S.

Another person doesn’t even need to understand what spirituality is, that’s how profound Shit is.

This is precisely why converting people to your ideology doesn’t work, and you are just fooling yourself.

Edited by Yimpa

“I once tried to explain existential dread to my toaster, but it just popped up and said, "Same."“ -Gemini AI

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23 hours ago, witpo44 said:

 

Here are the questions?

  1. If we are God, why would God fall asleep to itself? Isn’t God complete without need for revolution?
  2. I’m a 45 year old mom of 2 young teen boys. Sometimes I think having these answers will make me a better human, and in turn, a better mother. But I also wonder if I’m opening Pandora’s Box. I don’t know how my mothering or my relationship with my kids will be affected by this journey. I don’t feel grounded right now and my kids rely on ME to feel grounded. For those on the other side, would you hesitate on this journey in any way if you were mothering kids who still really need you? 

Thanks for your advice and insights. (Be honest, but gentle).

1. god is dreaming, that's what it does for fun up there in infinity land, just like you do down here in finity land when you go to bed at night, enjoy some adventure bliss creativity ... indeed when it dreams those dreams last a long time since god loves its sabbath naps up there after working like a dog for 6 days a week ... god has on this occasion dreamed you into existence and you are at some point going to opt to wake up once you get tired of the back and forth of duality and then you will go back to being the rejuvenated happy loving god you always were

2. all you need to do is be the light, the example, the embodiment of the worthwhile life, you don't need to give your family your beliefs about anything, i mean you don't know that much yourself in truth, none of us do, so just keep living light and love and they will certainly get the message

oh and i also thoroughly endorse gary renard mentioned earlier, this will knock your socks off i would say

last of all welcome to this madhouse, hope you will stick around and join in the fun, sending you lots of love, is nice meeting you

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On 28.11.2023 at 7:58 PM, witpo44 said:

I

  1. If we are God, why would God fall asleep to itself? Isn’t God complete without need for revolution?
  2. I’m a 45 year old mom of 2 young teen boys. Sometimes I think having these answers will make me a better human, and in turn, a better mother. But I also wonder if I’m opening Pandora’s Box. I don’t know how my mothering or my relationship with my kids will be affected by this journey. I don’t feel grounded right now and my kids rely on ME to feel grounded. For those on the other side, would you hesitate on this journey in any way if you were mothering kids who still really need you? 

Thanks for your advice and insights. (Be honest, but gentle).

1. god is already complete yes. the purpose of evolution is not to make him complete but to create an expereince that would actually reflect his awsomeness. there is no goal here, its just a game for fun. 

2. yes i would hesitate, theyre life depend on you. just go lightly into spirituality in a way that wont dismante your whole life. youll have time later in life when they are more independent to do that without feeling guilty and being irresposible. 

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On 11/28/2023 at 7:58 PM, witpo44 said:

But I also wonder if I’m opening Pandora’s Box

i wish i had this simple worry before i started. it seemed so freaking innocent, i heard a self inquiry instruction and it sort of clicked and i went into that space "behind the thoughts". 

 

On 11/28/2023 at 7:58 PM, witpo44 said:

would you hesitate on this journey in any way if you were mothering kids who still really need you? 

i did hear gary weber talking about having particular difficulty about close relationships or something. that comes kinda late though i wouldnt worry

Edited by Monster

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On 11/29/2023 at 5:14 AM, Parallax Mind said:

Yes we all are, the difference is awakened people consciously choose their dillusions. It's called lucid living (instead of lucid dreaming).

🤯

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6 hours ago, Monster said:

i heard a self inquiry instruction and it sort of clicked and i went into that space "behind the thoughts". 

I can't fathom a "click." That space feels so far away.  

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I doubt you'll need to worry about being ungrounded. You're in your forties, I believe it's a great time to be spiritual. Especially after your kids can stand on their own feet.

Take your time but also be emotionally invested. The path that the people of Actualized.org walk is usually just that of contemplation and truth. Therefore, what you need most is knowledge and time to contemplate and meditate.

Once you start grasping things and things start clicking (it'll take some time), you can work on embodiment.

Do not concern yourself with contemplating God and such now. First try understanding who or what you are in there.

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12 minutes ago, Swarnim said:

You're in your forties, I believe it's a great time to be spiritual. Especially after your kids can stand on their own feet.

A true test of spirituality is having a disabled child who will challenge all of your ideas about reality. 


“I once tried to explain existential dread to my toaster, but it just popped up and said, "Same."“ -Gemini AI

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On 11/29/2023 at 0:52 PM, gettoefl said:

that's what it does for fun

This was another burning question. I'm going to stop torturing myself now with "why." ;) 

"all you need to do is be the light, the example, the embodiment of the worthwhile life" -  Great advice. This is what I envision. 

 

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Howdy. Be patient. Take it slow. Once you get bit by the spirituality bug, there is no going back. :)

It is a Pandora's box during the process. Maybe it is even a Pandora's box at the end and the destination. It is the yin yang symbol. It is good and evil. Find peace by accepting both. There may or may not be a dirty little secret of Buddhism and Hinduism of "no free will." Surrender and just be.

It is hard to talk about god. So we use stories and symbolism and imagery like heaven and hell and the devil. So god "dreaming" this universe or being "asleep" or "I am god but I wiped my memory so I could enjoy the emotional rollercoaster" are all just ways to capture and convey what is going on. We are breaking our paradigms and shifting perspectives. So to answer your question, god is not a woman/person or you asleep or with amnesia. God is more like a force or a source and god is pure creation and imagination and a kaleidoscope of chaos. So maybe there are infinite universes. Or maybe god is simply a being with no body and there is no location or space or time. We should not anthropomorphize god and say she is "lonely" because an omnipotent being may not experience loneliness. But maybe god just wants a friend or equal to talk to but has spent eternity looking and is still alone. So god created all these universes to talk to herself and interact with herself. Maybe our search for love and even our search for aliens is a microcosm of god's search for a friend. Maybe there is only one god and one substance which is the monad, dao, brahman, etc. In our dreams we are convinced it is real until we wake up and realize it was all a dream. So it is plausible that our waking life is also a dream and some day we will awaken maybe when we die. Or maybe this is just another fun way to break our paradigm.

As a mother you can trust your instinct with your children. Kids are smart and can smell a lie. So be real and be authentic. The truth is always best and your personal truth is best. Maybe your purpose is to be their stepping stone to awakening. It is a balancing act. Buddha left his wife and son so there is a danger of this. But your children may have to walk a difficult road. We are all one.

Be well. Safe travels. One love. :)

Edited by Soul Flight

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4 minutes ago, Soul Flight said:

Howdy. Be patient. Take it slow. Once you get bit by the spirituality bug, there is no going back. :)

It is a Pandora's box during the process. Maybe it is even a Pandora's box at the end and the destination. It is the yin yang symbol. It is good and evil. Find peace by accepting both. There may or may not be a dirty little secret of Buddhism and Hinduism of "no free will." Surrender and just be.

It is hard to talk about god. So we use stories and symbolism and imagery like heaven and hell and the devil. So god "dreaming" this universe or being "asleep" or "I am god but I wiped my memory so I could enjoy the emotional rollercoaster" are all just ways to capture and convey what is going on. We are breaking our paradigms and shifting perspectives. So to answer your question, god is not a woman or you asleep or with amnesia. God is more like a force or a source and god is pure creation and imagination and a kaleidoscope of chaos. So maybe there are infinite universes. Or maybe god is simply a being with no body and there is no location or space or time. We should not anthropomorphize god and say she is "lonely" because an omnipotent being may not experience loneliness. But maybe god just wants a friend or equal to talk to but has spent eternity looking and is still alone. So god created all these universes to talk to herself and interact with herself. Maybe our search for love and even our search for aliens is a microcosm of god's search for a friend. Maybe there is only one god and one substance which is the monad, dao, brahman, etc. In our dreams we are convinced it is a real until we wake up and realize it was all a dream. So it is plausible that our waking life is also a dream and some day we will awaken maybe when we die. Or maybe this is just another fun way to break our paradigm.

As a mother you can trust your instinct with your children. Kids are smart and can smell a lie. So be real and be authentic. The truth is always best and your personal truth is best. Maybe your purpose is to be their stepping stone to awakening. It is a balancing act. Buddha left his wife and son so there is a danger of this. But your children may have to walk a difficult road. We are all one.

Be well. Safe travels. One love. :)

Nice


Thought = Time. Without thought there's no time. Death is the end of the illusion.

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On 28/11/2023 at 6:58 PM, witpo44 said:
  • If we are God, why would God fall asleep to itself? Isn’t God complete without need for revolution?

You are too far away to get to that point don't worry. If you just started to study maths, would it make sense trying to understand Advanced Calculus II?

It does not. Go step by step, things take care of themselves. There arrives a point where all enigmas are resolved, in the meanwhile step by step keep dancing with the music that calls you to awaken.

 

On 28/11/2023 at 6:58 PM, witpo44 said:

I’m a 45 year old mom of 2 young teen boys. Sometimes I think having these answers will make me a better human, and in turn, a better mother. But I also wonder if I’m opening Pandora’s Box. I don’t know how my mothering or my relationship with my kids will be affected by this journey. I don’t feel grounded right now and my kids rely on ME to feel grounded. For those on the other side, would you hesitate on this journey in any way if you were mothering kids who still really need you? 

Nobody can say but it depends in the path you choose to walk. If you go into a discrimination path it surely will in the process, but not in the end, given that you arrive. However, if you choose the path of love, or something more femenine, motherly type, it can enhance your life so much. You will feel the mother of every kid you see, every living creature you will love them all as your own childs, you will feel the whole creation is your beloved child, your very own. 

It depends on the path you choose, so make sure it fits properly with your lifestyle. Some kind of stuff like I am not the body, not the mind probably not suitable, because you are responsible of your body and 2 more. Make it about love and serving, selflessless, compassion. However, if you want to go to the deep end of the pool you will have to face some things, but let's say that they will be by that point fully grown up adults. 

Also understand you need to take care of your body, mind and consciousness. All can and should be done simultaneously. In fact having a steady life makes meditation and awakening easy.


God-Realize, this is First Business. Know that unless you live properly, this is not possible.

There is this body, you should know the requirements of your body. This is first duty. We have obligations towards others, loved ones, family, society, etc. Without material wealth we cannot do these things, for that a professional duty.

There is Mind; mind is wild. Its higher nature should be nurtured, then Mind becomes mature and conscious. When all Duties are continuously fulfilled, then life becomes steady. In this steady life God is available; via 5-MeO-DMT, ...                         Discipline this life & Realize Absolute Infinity

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On 11/28/2023 at 7:58 PM, witpo44 said:

I’m constantly searching for the “knowing” and “certainty.”

In the end all you want is Clarity. To see reality clearly, to see Truth without any of your ego's lables good/bad/like/dislike on things and situations.

On 11/28/2023 at 7:58 PM, witpo44 said:
  • If we are God, why would God fall asleep to itself? Isn’t God complete without need for revolution?
  •  

God falls asleep to itself because God wants to feel like there is Others. Because you are all alone. This illusion is so perfect.

On 11/28/2023 at 7:58 PM, witpo44 said:
  1. I’m a 45 year old mom of 2 young teen boys. Sometimes I think having these answers will make me a better human, and in turn, a better mother. But I also wonder if I’m opening Pandora’s Box. I don’t know how my mothering or my relationship with my kids will be affected by this journey. I don’t feel grounded right now and my kids rely on ME to feel grounded. For those on the other side, would you hesitate on this journey in any way if you were mothering kids who still really need you? 

 

Wait a little, dont deep down right away into this journey because it's not easy, believe me. There will come a time where you might feel like you are going crazy, insane, like you are loosing everything that you "had".

I've been on this road for 6 years now, and only NOW I got my shit together grounded in Truth. But I still have so much to do/let go.

Be very cafeful with using psychedelics, they can put you in places/experience3s where you will need a couple of months to get back on your feet and in that time you will fall back big time. Im not saying this will happen, but take caution, psychedelics aren't toys. Sometimes Truth just breaks you to peaces.

I would recommend you learn some kind of spiritual practice that you are comfortable with and could do daily. Nothing beats hard work, it's gradual and sustainable.

Good luck, I know where you are now, hope you will find the light.

Edited by inFlow
typos

Mahadev

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Don't fall into the path of mental masturbation though, ha ha! Unless you enjoy it as an activity just like watching a movie.

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You're not asking for feedback on the awakening process.  You're asking theological/metaphysical questions.

What's happening is that your ego is generating these questions to distract you from awakening further -- essentially sending you on a wild goose chase.

If you answer these questions to your satisfaction, it will generate more questions.  It never ends.

So, you're experiencing an EGO TRAP.  This happens quite often when you have a breakthrough - there is an ego backlash.

Simply be aware of the tricks the ego is playing and stay present and focus on what's has gotten you this far.  You didn't get this far by asking metaphysical questions - right?

Edited by SeaMonster

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4 hours ago, SeaMonster said:

Simply be aware of the tricks the ego is playing and stay present and focus on what's has gotten you this far.  You didn't get this far by asking metaphysical questions - right?

I did. I asked why did my friend’s boyfriend die last year? What did he do to deserve it? 

This was followed by intense emotions, deep introspection, and the willingness to seriously experience what the fuck DEATH is…?

Edited by Yimpa

“I once tried to explain existential dread to my toaster, but it just popped up and said, "Same."“ -Gemini AI

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