preventingdiabetes

How do I stop an addiction to excessive theorizing/thinking?

49 posts in this topic

Posted (edited)

This has been plaguing my day to day life.

I have a huge addiction to thinking and theorizing.

I keep thinking that Life Purpose is a distraction and that I should just focus on Enlightenment. 

I keep guilting myself into doing things that are not conducive to Enlightenment work because that is what is most important to me. 

Even though my survival needs aren't met, I don't have motivation to meet them. I want to transcend survival. Or go to a monastery and become a monk.

For example: If I wanted to be a self help teacher, an artist, a book author, or a musician, I'd just think that it's a distraction from Enlightenment work. 

Do I focus on Life Purpose and financial freedom? or Enlightenment? Should I just renounce life and become a monk? I don't know what to do man. 

I just overthink everything I do. 

 

Edited by preventingdiabetes

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Are there any questions that I could journal on when it comes to this? Meditating doesn't fix it. 

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I can totally relate. I used to think this way as well, not to say that it's wrong rather than an escapist mentality. 

You can go become a monk if you want, but you are going to have many constraints and need to follow certain rules of that monastery. You still have attachments don't you? 

See the ego thinks "oh if I become a monk I will be happy and have this great life" but it's going to be hard af. I think becoming a monk is the most hardcore thing one can do. You can test how hardcore you are by doing solo retreats, if you haven't already done so. Try 10 days, 30 days maybe even 50 days then you can commit to being a monk. Test the waters basically. 

I personally think a better way to live (even if you don't have your LP) is to make money and strategically invest in order to meet at least basic survival needs and once that's setup you can work on enlightenment from the comfort of your home. You can do yoga, go meet the shamans, do psychedelics rather than being stuck in the monastery cleaning floors and meditating 24/7. 

Although I do think becoming a monk for 1 or 2 years (if that's actually possible) and coming back could probably be very useful, since you will have a much clear picture of what you want from your life. There is clarity in simplicity. 

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Posted (edited)

I wonder if your overthinking is really coming from fear.  This I suspect. ...?

Notice it. 

Notice the overthinking.  

Notice any emotions in your body.  Sometimes thoughts come as a way to distract from feelings.  Feelings that could be the key to what you want.  Whether they are painful feelings that, if felt and released, would help you gain clarity.  Or if they are fears covering up what you actually do want, or fears about actually becoming conscious of the things you do want.  

Or...

Notice the overthinking.   Stop it.  Get back to what you were doing.  

"Hey!  I'm overthinking again!  Fuck me :)!" ... and proceed. 

Trust yourself. 

Trust your feelings.

Notice.  Catch yourself wandering into thought.  Come back.

Just like meditation.  = Focus -> Distract -> Reset -> Focus -> ... 

  1. Do you man.  Sounds like you might be helping yourself if you got some of the basics down first.  This seems to be a common trap in spirituality, one I know I've gotten stuck in.  And still get stuck in when I'm desperate.  The trap = Spiritual bypassing real life issues when we're feeling hopeless.  

... But hey, I dunno, maybe you would do good becoming a monk too.  Renunciate.  You gotta make that call.

...

Honestly though, I think if you really just wanna stop excessive thinking, it's just like any other habitual, unconscious, addictive patter.  The basics being

  1. Notice when it's happening.  This'll take some hefty practice in the start since you're so used to doing it on auto. 
  2. When you notice yourself doing it, stop.  Bring awareness.  Often addiction are escapes from emotions you dislike.  So see if you can ask "What thing or emotion am I running from?" and see if you feel that.  
  3. Be without the thoughts for a bit and get accustomed to the feelings you were probably avoiding.  
  4. Then it's just a matter of training yourself with this.  

But do what works and feels right for you.  

 

That's my cup every time you think excessively.  

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Edited by Matt23

"Just a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down"   --   Marry Poppins

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here's my 2 cents: you can't think your way out of overthinking, lol

@gggkkk nice reply. insightful!

 

 

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@Matt23 Alright! Helped me as well.


"I believe you are more afraid of condemning me to the stake than for me to receive your cruel and disproportionate punishment."

- Giordano Bruno, Campo de' Fiori, Rome, Italy. February 17th, 1600.

Cosmic pluralist, mathematician and poet.

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On 13/06/2021 at 0:44 AM, gggkkk said:

I can totally relate. I used to think this way as well, not to say that it's wrong rather than an escapist mentality.

@gggkkk How did you get over it? What are signs that it’s an escapist mentality? How can I tell that it is?

 

What benefits would being financially free get me? That being a monk in an ashram can’t? 

On 15/06/2021 at 3:22 PM, Matt23 said:

Notice the overthinking.   Stop it.  Get back to what you were doing

It’s hard to just stop it. The pull of the thought is very strong. It’s like I fear that something will go wrong if I don’t follow through on that thought. 

On 15/06/2021 at 3:22 PM, Matt23 said:
  • Notice when it's happening.  This'll take some hefty practice in the start since you're so used to doing it on auto. 
  • When you notice yourself doing it, stop.  Bring awareness.  Often addiction are escapes from emotions you dislike.  So see if you can ask "What thing or emotion am I running from?" and see if you feel that.  
  • Be without the thoughts for a bit and get accustomed to the feelings you were probably avoiding.  
  • Then it's just a matter of training yourself with this.  

I think I’m running from getting into a trap. So I try to be perfectionistic with everything I am doing. 

On 15/06/2021 at 7:49 PM, nistake said:

How about focusing on your LP AND consciousness work simultaneously?

But what if my time would be better spent only doing consciousness work? 

 

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Everyone of us are prone to overlook Being and instead get caught up in mind and thinking.  This is a forgetting of sorts. We can let go of mind and return to a degree of peace and understanding that comes from a certain kind of remembering of something that deep inside we already knew.
 

We Don’t Sufficiently Value Simply Being

So can you let yourself be? I am not suggesting that you let yourself be to get anything or do anything, even to understand anything. I mean just to be. Are you giving yourself the simple privilege of being, of existence? Why do you think that what you do, what you have, what you get or don’t get are more important than just being here? Why are you always wanting to get something or go somewhere? Why not just relax and be here, simply existing in all your cells, inhabiting all your body? When are you going to let yourself descend from your lofty preoccupations, and simply land where you are? Stop striving after all kinds of things; stop dreaming, scheming, planning, working, achieving, attempting, moving, manipulating, trying to be something, trying to get somewhere. You forget the simplest, most obvious thing, which is to be here. If you are not in your body, you miss the source of all significance, meaning, and satisfaction. How can you feel the satisfaction, if you aren’t here? We miss who we are, which is fundamentally beingness, existence. If we are not here, we exist only on the fringes of reality. We don’t sufficiently value simply being. Instead, we value what we want to accomplish, or what we want to possess. It is our biggest mistake. It is called the “great betrayal.” We are always looking for pleasure, frantically seeking happiness in many ways, and totally missing the simplest, most fundamental pleasure, which actually is also the greatest pleasure: just being here. When we are really present, the presence itself is made out of fullness, contentment, and blissful pleasure. 

Diamond Heart Book Three, pg. 12

from: https://www.diamondapproach.org/glossary/refinery_phrases/being-simply-being

 

Most of the Time You do not Know Where You Are

Practices that aim to put you in a particular state have a whole mind-set attached to them, which is the mind-set of that particular state. The problem is that this can become your mind-set, providing you with a mental framework, which means a particular orientation toward your experience. And we want to be free from any mental framework. So true meditation, true practice, according to the Diamond Approach, consists of following your thread, which means being where you are and continuing to be where you are without trying to make your experience go in any particular way. This requires practice because most of the time, you do not know where you are, you do not understand where you are, or you are fighting and rejecting where you are. This is the normal state of the ego-self, for the ego is always trying to get someplace, to make itself be a certain way. The ego-self is constantly judging and rejecting its arising state and trying to fit itself into a certain ideal. It is not just being where it is and allowing itself to unfold freely. As a result, it does not understand where it is, for it is invested in being somewhere in particular, being a certain way, or i satisfying a particular ideal. And even if this ideal is taken from spiritual teachings, the same mechanism of ego activity is in operation. Trapped in the ego-self, you do not trust that Being itself will take you where you need to go.

Spacecruiser Inquiry, pg. 185

from: https://www.diamondapproach.org/glossary/refinery_phrases/being-where-you-are

 

Being Where You Are

This process of locating yourself is a profoundly personal one, a subtle and sensitive unfolding of inner awareness that does not use obvious external signposts to tell you where you are at any given time. It requires discipline and patience, gentleness and attunement, because the only one who can know where your consciousness is is you. To truly be where you are requires a capacity for listening, a willingness to be open, and a curiosity about your own experience that most likely few people have ever shown toward you.
What this calls for is the development of your ability to truly witness yourself, to be a pure and undistorted mirror for where and how you are appearing in the moment. Ultimately, this means seeing yourself without the aid of anyone else’s perspective, anyone else’s experience, or anyone else’s beliefs and judgments. It means not seeing yourself from the outside or locating yourself by where you are relative to external criteria. It is by seeing yourself from inside, from the center of your own experience, that you can discover your own truth, the untouched True Nature of what you are.

The Unfolding Now, pg. 224


Many more excerpts about Being can be accessed through the ‘B’ page of the glossary- https://www.diamondapproach.org/glossary/alphabetical?alphabet=2

 


"To have a free mind is to be a universal heretic." - A.H. Almaas

"We have to bless the living crap out of everyone." - Matt Kahn

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Posted (edited)

18 hours ago, preventingdiabetes said:
On 6/14/2021 at 8:22 PM, Matt23 said:

Notice the overthinking.   Stop it.  Get back to what you were doing

It’s hard to just stop it. The pull of the thought is very strong. It’s like I fear that something will go wrong if I don’t follow through on that thought. 

On 6/14/2021 at 8:22 PM, Matt23 said:
  • Notice when it's happening.  This'll take some hefty practice in the start since you're so used to doing it on auto. 
  • When you notice yourself doing it, stop.  Bring awareness.  Often addiction are escapes from emotions you dislike.  So see if you can ask "What thing or emotion am I running from?" and see if you feel that.  
  • Be without the thoughts for a bit and get accustomed to the feelings you were probably avoiding.  
  • Then it's just a matter of training yourself with this.  

I think I’m running from getting into a trap. So I try to be perfectionistic with everything I am doing. 

Maybe the start is just noticing then.  This could allow you to be more aware of how much suffering or "issues" this could be giving you.  Noticing also times when you're not overthinking and "being" more could give you a nice contrast and thus incentive to do less thinking and more being.  

I'd also recommend digging and contemplating what and why you think something will go wrong?  Try to feel that feeling of fear.  When you're feeling it and focusing on it, try asking it questions.  Like "what do you fear?", "How can I help you?", "Is there anything you want to tell me?", etc..  You might get some responses.  

I don't know your situation directly.  But for me, any sort of habitual/addictive behaviors have mostly been escapes from feelings.  So a key for me is to bring more awareness into the body and start exploring the sensations and feelings that the addiction is covering up.  

Takes practice and work.  

Perhaps even just noticing and saying "Oh! I'm over-thinking again" could be a great start.  Without necessarily changing anything.  And just noticing how you feel, and what effects and things happen as a result of your over-thinking.  Also, like I said earlier, being more aware of times when you're not over-thinking can help you realize how much over-thinking could be producing suffering for you and show you possibilities without it.  

And hey, it could be something like ADD, diet, exercise, heavy metal toxicity. or something completely different too.  Dunno.

Edited by Matt23

"Just a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down"   --   Marry Poppins

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@Zigzag Idiot

I don’t get it. Can you please give a summary or elaborate?

@Matt23
I fear going down the wrong path in life and regretting it later on. I want to be sure that I’m doing what’s best for me.

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5 hours ago, preventingdiabetes said:

 

 

@Matt23
I fear going down the wrong path in life and regretting it later on. I want to be sure that I’m doing what’s best for me.

Could this itself, this fear to make sure you choose the right path, be a trap?

Can you get in touch with any feelings that are associated with this desire?  Feel into them.  You can even tell them soothing things like "I'm here for you." And "If there's anything you want from me or to tell me, I'm hear to listen."  Etc..  sometimes just understanding them is the cure and initiates releases rather than 'fixing' or solving.

What would happen if you did go down the "wrong" path?  And if that result happened, so what?  You can keep asking questions like "so what?" And "then what would happen?" Until you reach something more fundamental.  

Also, if you notice that you fear making wrong decisions in daily life, small things objectively speaking, try just doing those and see wgat happens.  You might realize that making the "wrong decisions" isn't so bad, that you learn from them, and that you have the ability to bounce back.   

Perhaps also contemplating your possible worldview that says there is a wrong path.  What does the "wrong path" look and feel lime to you?  Is it accurate?  Is it likely to happen to you?  Is it true?  Has it ever happened to you?  Can you see any previous life situations that may have contributed to fearing a "wrong path"?  Etc..

I intuit there's some more baseline belief that's causing fear that then makes you overthink.  

Investigate.  Be curious.  Enjoy exploring yourself :)


"Just a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down"   --   Marry Poppins

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On 6/24/2021 at 1:43 AM, Matt23 said:

Could this itself, this fear to make sure you choose the right path, be a trap?

Yes. It’s stopping me from taking enough action. It is perfectionism. 

On 6/24/2021 at 1:43 AM, Matt23 said:

Can you get in touch with any feelings that are associated with this desire?  Feel into them.

I think I am not in touch with my feelings. I can’t really “feel”.

On 6/24/2021 at 1:43 AM, Matt23 said:

What would happen if you did go down the "wrong" path?  And if that result happened, so what?  You can keep asking questions like "so what?" And "then what would happen?" Until you reach something more fundamental.  

If I went down the wrong path I’d feel suffering and regret.
So what? I’d be in a position in life I don’t want to be in.

So what? I will feel as if I’d wasted potential and energy.

So what? I would have learned something either way with the newfound experience I’ve gained. 

Ah I see! The more experience I gain in life, the more I figure out what I want and don’t want. 

So if I were to become a monk right now and realise that I don’t enjoy the process of being a monk, then I’d know that I’m not ready for it yet.

 

Thank you @Matt23

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On 6/12/2021 at 2:25 AM, preventingdiabetes said:

This has been plaguing my day to day life.

I have a huge addiction to thinking and theorizing.

I keep thinking that Life Purpose is a distraction and that I should just focus on Enlightenment. 

I keep guilting myself into doing things that are not conducive to Enlightenment work because that is what is most important to me. 

Even though my survival needs aren't met, I don't have motivation to meet them. I want to transcend survival. Or go to a monastery and become a monk.

For example: If I wanted to be a self help teacher, an artist, a book author, or a musician, I'd just think that it's a distraction from Enlightenment work. 

Do I focus on Life Purpose and financial freedom? or Enlightenment? Should I just renounce life and become a monk? I don't know what to do man. 

I just overthink everything I do.

Keep it simple. Follow what makes you feel love.

Thinking a lot is not necessarily a bad thing. The mind can be a gift if you learn to channel it properly. Some of us are deep thinkers. If that's you, recognize that and don't hold it as a negative.


You are God. You are Love. You are Infinity. You are Leo.

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Dude, we’re the same person. ;)

Do you exercise intensively everyday? Usually I find that the mind takes over my life when I haven’t exercised for a while.

Focus on body awareness, discipline your actions so that you can get into something, any activity — some project, hobby, career, study.

Video games are also beneficial in that regard. Try throwing yourself into a story-driven game. Play The Last of Us 2. xD 


“Self-interest is but the survival of the animal in us. Humanity only begins for man with self-surrender.” - Henri Amiel.

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On 23.6.2021 at 9:53 AM, preventingdiabetes said:

@Zigzag Idiot

I don’t get it. Can you please give a summary or elaborate?

Have you taken the time to really read through this? I've read these books too and even without context, these are crystal clear pointers. Read it again, it's all you need. Allow yourself to be, without agenda, be where you are (means: be fully present to and clear about what is objectively true in your experience: BE what is, don't interpret what is). Make this into a practice, take @Nahm's explanations of the practices, follow @Leo Gura 's advice to orient yourself towards love, and this brings you to what @Matt23 has pointed at: you will see the source of the fear/pain/emotion that is using the thinking to keep itself unseen. This is your thread of understanding. 

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Thinking a lot is not a problem, compulsive thinking is, or rather, it's a symptom of a problem. Namely, a closed root chakra, in other words, lack of grounding. Try this and see what happens:

 


The road to God is paved with bliss.

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19 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

Keep it simple. Follow what makes you feel love.

Thinking a lot is not necessarily a bad thing. The mind can be a gift if you learn to channel it properly. Some of us are deep thinkers. If that's you, recognize that and don't hold it as a negative.

@Leo Gura What makes me feel love is feeling on purpose.

But I also want Enlightenment. If that’s what makes me feel the most love, that’s what I want.

But I don’t really enjoy the process of meditating and doing yoga, etc. It’s a means to an end (Enlightenment) for me. 

A part of me still fantasises about becoming a monk so I can dedicate all my time to Enlightenment. But then I don’t know how I’d develop up the Spiral stages by just sitting on the cushion and meditating.

13 hours ago, Arzola said:

Do you exercise intensively everyday? Usually I find that the mind takes over my life when I haven’t exercised for a while.

Focus on body awareness, discipline your actions so that you can get into something, any activity — some project, hobby, career, study.

Video games are also beneficial in that regard. Try throwing yourself into a story-driven game. Play The Last of Us 2. xD 

As in, physical exercise? Yes. I workout 60-90 minutes a day, plus I like to do it.

But what if that activity is a distraction from what would make me most happy? 
 

Video-games only distract me from my mind temporarily. Afterwards, I’m straight back to my overthinking mind, except this time - more guilty. 

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@Nahm When you are Doing, are you Being?

11 hours ago, peanutspathtotruth said:

Have you taken the time to really read through this? I've read these books too and even without context, these are crystal clear pointers. Read it again, it's all you need.

@peanutspathtotruth

I don’t know how to embody it. How do I just “be”? How will I survive if I don’t strive towards meeting my money needs? That requires doing doesn’t it?

7 hours ago, martins name said:

Thinking a lot is not a problem, compulsive thinking is, or rather, it's a symptom of a problem. Namely, a closed root chakra, in other words, lack of grounding. Try this and see what happens.

@martins name 
Thanks for the link. I’ll do that when I get home.
 

And yes, compulsive thinking is exactly my problem.

What other techniques can I use to open my root chakra? I want to go all in and solve this for good.

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