Peo

How to comunicate non-duality to other people?

38 posts in this topic

Posted (edited)

I have been trying to find out how to comunicate non duality to my friends and my family, but i dont know how. They are asking me questions that i dont know how to answer. I cant just say you dont exist and that i'm literally my own family. I cant speak to them about the emptiness. They will just not be able to listen to me. Non-duality is difficult to comunicate to other people. I have tried to comunicate this to my family, but they just say it is theory and just philosophy. My family just drag me down. They wont let me just do a 30 dayes retreat without a reason.

So how do i comunicate this to my family and my friends?

Edited by Peo
Grammar

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@Peo

Firstly be the one who pays for it. Get a part-time job and make some money. That way you are not beholden to their financial favors.

Second, you don't have to tell them it's for a retreat. Alan Watts (that joker!) once said that a clever Bodhisatva only tells others of his enlightenment when its too late for them to do anything about it. So some tact is perhaps helpful here. 

I understand how it feels when others want to tyrannize you. 


When kept from their true origin, all yearn
For union on the day they can return. - Rumi

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@Shin I have no desire to teach non-duality. My goal is to communicate this to my friends and family to prevent them from thinking i am crazy or that i am deluded. 

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Posted (edited)

10 minutes ago, Peo said:

@Shin I have no desire to teach non-duality. My goal is to communicate this to my friends and family to prevent them from thinking i am crazy or that i am deluded. 

Then they'll think you're deluded.
You can't communicate this to people that aren't ready without sounding insane.

To them, you're even worse than a religious person, because at least a religious person has some "values" and believe in a God that you can identify with.
Non-duality sounds like nihilism at best, and dangerous sect beliefs at worst.

Edited by Shin

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure
- Marianne Williamson

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2 minutes ago, Peo said:

@Shin I have no desire to teach non-duality. My goal is to communicate this to my friends and family to prevent them from thinking i am crazy or that i am deluded. 

Yeah, this is tough. By undertaking the spiritual journey, you will often seem different, maybe weird.

Maybe instead of trying to communicate some theory that you heard, try to communicate your feelings? Why are you really doing it? What emotions are behind it, what is your actual experience?


Use the Prayer Swat Team!

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Posted (edited)

Either you don't talk about it or they'll think you're deluded. You can't force this topic on them, because if you do, it'll trigger their egos even more. Unfortunately, that's the case.

Edited by nistake

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@nistake Should i lie? Should i just come up with a story behind this spiritual journey that will not trigger their ego?

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7 minutes ago, Shin said:

You can't communicate this to people that aren't ready without sounding insane.

To them, you're even worst than a religious person, because at least a religious person has some "values" and believe in a God that you can identify with.
Non-duality sounds like nihilism at best, and dangerous sect beliefs at worst.

lol agreed 100%

#BeenThereDoneThat

 

@Peo this right here bro. ^^^


"When you discover Stillness in the movement, and the Unchanging within the changing, then you have found your eternal home."

All perspectives are true, but there is only one -----> TRUTH

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@Peo

3 minutes ago, Peo said:

 Should i lie? Should i just come up with a story behind this spiritual journey that will not trigger their ego?

why? are they asking and questioning what it is that you do in your day to day living? if not. then just kill your own need or want to tell them about this. just keep doing your thing.

if you need help and support you got us here.

 

 

 


"When you discover Stillness in the movement, and the Unchanging within the changing, then you have found your eternal home."

All perspectives are true, but there is only one -----> TRUTH

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I dont talk to my family and friends about enlightenment theory.  I wouldnt talk to Mooji about enlightenment if he came over for dinner.  These conversations end up being fucking useless and spread only confusion


Comprehensive list of techniques: https://sites.google.com/site/psychospiritualtools/Home/meditation-practices

I appreciate criticism!  Be as critical/nitpicky as you like and don't hold your blows

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8 minutes ago, Peo said:

@nistake Should i lie? Should i just come up with a story behind this spiritual journey that will not trigger their ego?

I don't think you should lie. You don't even need to go into specifics when you're talking about spirituality. At least, that's what I do. When my family and friends ask about it, I usually just say that I meditate on a daily basis and I do yoga. In most cases, that's enough for them. If somebody asks for specifics, I gladly go into details, of course.

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Yeah its probably not worth it, i do like talking about it but i would only do so if the person was extremely open minded or they asked me about it. If its the first time someones hearing about it, its impossible for them to switch from what they currently believe to what youre telling them as it will most likely contradict everything they 'know' so its a big ask. Ask yourself whether you wouldve just bought in if someone had told you about non-duality a few years ago.

In terms of your family, just find the easiest way to tell them what they need to hear, you could be going to a camp instead of calling it a retreat for example

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Posted (edited)

Yeah you will be fighting a loosing battle, a mind has to be ready to be woken up you can't force it. The best thing you can do leading by example, show then through your actions and your presence. If you start to live a very peaceful and fulfilled life people will want it. 

I learned this the hard way, it just freaks people out. 

Edited by noselfnofun

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@Peo It's generally not a good idea to communicate to people about non-duality. What would make them think you're crazy if you don't talk to them about it? Talking to them about it seems more likely to make you seem crazy.

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Mind you, you can plant seeds. Very small bits of truth that may lead them onto wanting more, sneaky but hell we all want to be at peace. I realised if you wanna drag people to heaven they will be kicking and screaming the entire ride. 

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8 minutes ago, Markus said:

@Peo It's generally not a good idea to communicate to people about non-duality. What would make them think you're crazy if you don't talk to them about it? Talking to them about it seems more likely to make you seem crazy.

He may be at the stage where you want people to understand you about it,

Because yourself think it is crazy, and if other people don't validate it, it does not make it ok for you to pursue it.


Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure
- Marianne Williamson

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1 minute ago, Shin said:

He may be at the stage where you want people to understand you about it,

Because yourself think it is crazy, and if other people don't validate it, it does not make it ok for you to pursue it.

I think the wanting to tell people stage exists for the vast majority. It's hardly a good idea to follow through though, lol.

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@Peo

Offcourse they do exist 😂😂😂 and obviously one will think you have gone nuts if you say they don't exist 😂😂😂. 

Just say you are interested in medation and emotional mastery. 

May be the retreat is expensive so they are skeptical. 

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"Hey mom, you and I are one and there's no past and no future, so YOU need to let ME go to this PLACE in the FUTURE to do this THING so that then I can be ONE with everything." If that doesn't make sense to you, it's not going to make sense to anyone else.  

The frustration with not being able to communicate non-duality to others comes directly from the fact that we tend to turn non-duality into dogma.   Whenever you're trying to explain or think about non-duality, you are being dualistic. Non-duality is a dualistic concept, outside of its TRUE nature as a present moment experience of awareness, oneness and no thought. To seekers, these teachings point to that thing so they are useful to us and the language makes sense to us. If you are not seeking it's just utter nonsense. Try to explain it in terms of that you are seeking a certain experience or wisdom.

Outside of that you simply can't explain it to them because each time you try you're falling into dogma yourself. Practicing it in everyday life and embodying it in your interactions with them is the only thing that has a chance of changing their minds. You don't need to go on a retreat for this journey. If you are unable to do a retreat that means accepting that that is your journey. You and the journey are one. Life is happening for you. Your family and their resistance is part of your journey. You don't need to do A, B and C to get there. Your family is dragging you down. You don't need to convince your family to let you do a retreat and do the retreat to get there. There is no there, you're already there. 

If a retreat is part of your journey you'll manifest the experience without effort. 

 

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