I am enlightened. Sincere seekers: ask me anything

[Forestluv]

@Aakash When I reach a deeper level it is unstable at first. An energy appears that wants to create stable grounding. I try to be aware of that dynamic. The deeper I go, the more “paranormal” it seems and the desire for control gets more subtle.

This is just a dynamic in my mind-body. If it doesn't resonate with you, ditch it and move on. 

[Aakash]

@ajasatya Thank you for answering my question 

@Serotoninluv Thank you for answering my question 

you both answering it in your own ways, ones say discipline, the other says bad ego. none the less both are answers to my questions. 

it resonates because i have had experience of the desired ground/ control wanted when you dive deeper; ill remember to just keep on diving , like a ninja, diving past all the obsticles

Edited January 30, 2019 by Aakash

[Forestluv]

5 minutes ago, Aakash said:

you both answering it in your own ways, ones say discipline, the other says bad ego. none the less both are answers to my questions. 

I’m not saying bad ego. I’m saying that when awareness reaches a new depth, it can be unstable and a subtle egoic dynamic can enter in an effort to regain control how the mind-body is oriented.

[Aakash]

@Serotoninluv Yeah this is what i mean; sorry i don't have the vocabulary to show what i mean at this point in time, i didn't even mean it when i wrote i am enlightened. it was just the only words i could come up with! 

[Forestluv]

@Aakash Gotcha, no worries. Being genuine and curious is more important than having all the right words. 

[Aakash]

@Serotoninluv I've realised that genuine can only be experienced when one has realised to be content at moments notice, thus driving the wheel of curiosity out of pure genuinity. Thank you for helping 

love

[SriBhagwanYogi]

Why after lets say some progress in self inquiry or when i do it for couple hours  my third eye is pulsating even my head .

Do you know something about that do i need to stop , take break or is it normal spiritual thing ? It doesn’t heart but still its unusual for me

[winterknight]

34 minutes ago, SriBhagwanYogi said:

Why after lets say some progress in self inquiry or when i do it for couple hours  my third eye is pulsating even my head .

Do you know something about that do i need to stop , take break or is it normal spiritual thing ? It doesn’t heart but still its unusual for me

It's a normal spiritual thing.

Unless it's causing you pain/problems or you have family history of some related disease, I wouldn't worry about it.

[DrewNows]

Read your blog critique on Eckhart Tolle's Power of Now book/teachings. You definitely made some very good points! Id like to express my thoughts on it, being a dude who probably would have never even discovered spirituality/nonduality (or how it related to my on life) for a much longer time without reading his book (on accident). Some of your examples seem to pull his words out of context a bit. Tolle dumbs down much of the teachings in attempt at catering to his audience (as you know). People reading his book for the first time who are not seekers (like me) are really able to connect and understand the points he makes and directly relate it to our own life.

I agree on most of your criticism about negative emotions, however, again, some quotes simply taken out of context. 

Obviously surrender does not function the same for everybody. "through examination and articulation of your negative emotions -- so that they can both be accommodated in a new, higher solution" - these are your words, and often with a deeper understanding of our situation, the answer is there quite clearly without any negative emotions present. The triggered negative emotions disrupts clear understanding of our desired path in a given situation. But i agree to a degree, suppression of negative emotions is simply not a solution (learned this the hard way). 

Does the nondual awareness/consciousness not give the mind a deeper appreciation for everything we perceive? As a westerner i would vouch for most to see this world in a logical, compassionate materialistic sense where most of our beliefs/world views cannot be just thrown out the window. 

Much enjoyed your critique! I struggled to understand myself for over a year obsessed with Tolle's teachings and it only got me so far. I have your book and i will write a review once i get a chance to finish it

 

[Jack River]

@DrewNows book reader

[DrewNows]

1 minute ago, Jack River said:

@DrewNows book reader

book hater!!! 

[winterknight]

12 hours ago, DrewNows said:

Read your blog critique on Eckhart Tolle's Power of Now book/teachings. You definitely made some very good points! Id like to express my thoughts on it, being a dude who probably would have never even discovered spirituality/nonduality (or how it related to my on life) for a much longer time without reading his book (on accident).

Well, the fact that Tolle has pulled many people into interest in nonduality is definitely a plus for him. Glad you enjoyed the critique 

[Preetom]

@winterknight

There are instructions in classical scriptures like Yoga Vashishtha, Ashtavakra Gita etc that goes like this:

See your body/mind as if it is someone else's body/mind. That means seeing every 'thing' about oneself in third person, non judgmentally and without any attachment.

Now lately I've been feeling exactly into this more and more. I look at my face in the mirror and it feels like someone I don't know and haven't related with ever (not in a creepy way. but there is no good or bad reaction involved).

The memory itself now feels really vague and hollow. I just can't relate to whatever story that is stored in memory. I just find myself now, and I can't see how I could come from anywhere else.

So basically pretty much everything in my sense perception and thoughts have lost a huge amount of charge behind them. Nothing feels personal and gripping. I find it a struggle to point at something and call it 'me'.

My question is, is this a phase in the process? or will this keep going on and on until all identification mechanism is shattered once and for all?

[Jkris]

@Preetom only for few seconds it happened to me. I was speaking to my dad. Suddenly the speaker was not me. Body was not me. But after that back to old pattern. 

[Preetom]

Just now, Jkris said:

@Preetom only for few seconds it happened to me. I was speaking to my dad. Suddenly the speaker was not me. Body was not me. But after that back to old pattern. 

Well in my case, it is more stabilized and nothing flashy. I honestly can't relate with 'my' contents anymore. And the surprising thing is, it feels natural.

I mean how could I be this body/mind and all these things? How could anyone be the body/mind?

I'm contemplating these questions more and wanted to share it here cause if told this to regular people, they'd probably send to a mental hospital lol

 

[winterknight]

1 hour ago, Preetom said:

@winterknight

There are instructions in classical scriptures like Yoga Vashishtha, Ashtavakra Gita etc that goes like this:

See your body/mind as if it is someone else's body/mind. That means seeing every 'thing' about oneself in third person, non judgmentally and without any attachment.

Now lately I've been feeling exactly into this more and more. I look at my face in the mirror and it feels like someone I don't know and haven't related with ever (not in a creepy way. but there is no good or bad reaction involved).

The memory itself now feels really vague and hollow. I just can't relate to whatever story that is stored in memory. I just find myself now, and I can't see how I could come from anywhere else.

So basically pretty much everything in my sense perception and thoughts have lost a huge amount of charge behind them. Nothing feels personal and gripping. I find it a struggle to point at something and call it 'me'.

My question is, is this a phase in the process? or will this keep going on and on until all identification mechanism is shattered once and for all?

Can you show me the quotes you're talking about?

This kind of practice is a nice overarching "get you into the mood" instruction, and it might be true in some big picture, but this is not really the process that gets you to realization.

This is because you're simply identifying with a new story -- the "one who can't relate to the previous memories." Now instead of the old thought/feeling you have a new one, centered around the idea of "nothing feels personal and gripping."

You can't recognize the illusory nature of the "I" by imagining something about it -- that it is, that it isn't, that it's someone else's. That's a thought.

The real process is intense mental concentration either by attempting to grasp the I and/or an attempt at total surrender -- with the aim of abolishing thought, not going into one psychological state or another.

[Preetom]

15 minutes ago, winterknight said:

Can you show me the quotes you're talking about?

''He is a happy man whose mind is inwardly cool and free from attachment and hatred and who looks upon this (world) like a mere spectator''

-Yoga Vasishta Sara (chap 1, verse 19)

'' A great soul witnesses his body's actions as if they were another's. How can praise or blame disturb him?

-Ashtavakra Gita (verse 3.10, Bart Marshall translation)

19 minutes ago, winterknight said:

This is because you're simply identifying with a new story -- the "one who can't relate to the previous memories." Now instead of the old thought/feeling you have a new one, centered around the idea of "nothing feels personal and gripping."

You can't recognize the illusory nature of the "I" by imagining something about it -- that it is, that it isn't, that it's someone else's. That's a thought.

 Thank you. I get that self inquiry is all about focusing on the 'I', not any content of I, however gross or subtle it is. I'll keep up the inquiry.

21 minutes ago, winterknight said:

The real process is intense mental concentration either by attempting to grasp the I and/or an attempt at total surrender -- with the aim of abolishing thought, not going into one psychological state or another.

But this is where it sort of goes to the end of the line. After few minutes, it is clearly recognized that no content is 'I'. Even the slightest movement of attention is recognized as not 'I'. At that point, where to focus and how? From there, any attempt feels like another content.

Should I still pursue the 'I' with brute force or should I stay in that clear, dis-identified state as long as possible?

[winterknight]

14 minutes ago, Preetom said:

''He is a happy man whose mind is inwardly cool and free from attachment and hatred and who looks upon this (world) like a mere spectator''

-Yoga Vasishta Sara (chap 1, verse 19)

'' A great soul witnesses his body's actions as if they were another's. How can praise or blame disturb him?-Ashtavakra Gita (verse 3.10, Bart Marshall translation)

Gotcha. Yes, in one sense these could be read as an instruction to "see the world this way."

But in a deeper and more important sense, they are part of a series of pointers to What Cannot Be Directly Described meant to stop the mind, and the result being -- that the mind has these qualities. So they weren't necessarily meant to be directly imitated so much as they were part of a picture they were trying to get you to grasp. They were trying to make you go "Oh!" and have a little satori.

Quote

 

 Thank you. I get that self inquiry is all about focusing on the 'I', not any content of I, however gross or subtle it is. I'll keep up the inquiry.

But this is where it sort of goes to the end of the line. After few minutes, it is clearly recognized that no content is 'I'. Even the slightest movement of attention is recognized as not 'I'. At that point, where to focus and how? From there, any attempt feels like another content.

Should I still pursue the 'I' with brute force or should I stay in that clear, dis-identified state as long as possible?

 

Either way can work -- you can stay with whatever state of peace you get (the "clear, dis-identified state") and return the mind to it over and over any time any disturbing thought occurs to it.

And such thoughts are liable to occur, because any state where the question even can arise "should I still..." is still a subtly identified state.

So at that point you have two choices. As I said, stay in that state and return to it every time a thought occurs -- this would be a sort of surrender practice.

Or ask to whom the question could occur "what to do next?" (stay in the clear, dis-identified state or "still pursue the 'I'")?

Because the truth is not mere disidentification with all thoughts and feelings but a wordless beyond-a-doubt knowledge of what you actually are.

Edited February 1, 2019 by winterknight

[Preetom]

@winterknight

Thanks for the clarifications! Take care

[MiracleMan]

@winterknight 

1. Did you ever deal with an accumulation of anger, rage, and resentments? 

2.  Can anything be done during those surges of emotion to aid in my practice besides inquiry?

I'm specifically talking about repressed or suppressed thoughts and emotions, not as it relates to an individual having or owning it, but as an event, say, like a recurring weather pattern.

I've heard an analogy that the subconscious is like a stubborn child, while the conscious mind can rationalize and say 'everything is okay, there is nothing happening', the emotions still occur in a predictable cycle, sometimes provoked by events or sometimes apparently just happening without cause.

I realize that I'm reacting to what's not happening, such as a surge of rage occurs at a small upset, this tremendous burst of emotional energy arises, and there is an automatic resistance or contraction around that emotion.  So the emotional response is exaggerated in a sense.

I've been experiencing some negative side effects from Vipassana lately, and its much like clearing out an old wound, it's quite painful, and not all love, light, and rainbows.  I've been quite humbled by it.  Ive uncovered my internal parents, that seem to be stuck in my head, I've realized I'm also codependent and maybe these internal parents in my head are serving me in this way because of my insecurities, so my subconscious is trying to protect me by keeping those aspects of the parents around to keep me in line, and also safe.

I had an intense dream a few nights ago:  I was working in a compartment on an aircraft carrier, my Dad was hovering behind me as I worked nervously, my mother was shouting at me from a catwalk above me.  I remember getting frustrated and losing my cool, and shouting "Mother...get the FUCK OUT OF HERE!!!" and she did!  And I was relieved in the dream.  I don't remember more than that.

It's obvious I hold a lot of resentments toward my parents, but I'm 32 now, I love them so much, and I have great relationships with them now.  I don't get why I can't let go of so much of the rage!!  I can rationalize, be reasonable, and say that they did the best they fucking could, I'm so fucking lucky considering I know people from horrible situations and who have shitty relationships with their parents.

Maybe this will just take time.  I'm trying to start a Metta practice to take the edge off the Vipassana routine, and maybe build up more compassion for myself and others.  I'm practicing forgiveness, and praying too, it helps.  More than anything, I think if I could be kinder and more accepting of myself, I would be less harsh on others.  I don't think anyone in my entire life has been more abusive to me than me.

It's almost as if I feel a blockage or a dam, close to my heart, that is trying to protect me from harm.

Sorry to ramble, but this just sort of spilled out.  Respond to what you will and thanks.

Edited February 2, 2019 by MiracleMan