To the people of Actualized.org

[Rishabh R]

I have a question that why do normal people don't follow personal development work and even a tiny amount of them who do just scratch on the surface of it and later call self-help as non- sense. 

By self-help I mean meditating consistently, reframing failures, practicing emotional regulation at the times of stress.

Thank you in advance for the replies 😂.

[aurum]

@Rishabh R change is disruptive.

You often don't appreciate how difficult integrating change is until you've done it.

If some ways, you can be better off just being conservative and not trying to change your life too much. 

[trenton]

@Rishabh R in my case I am drawn to personal development due to my deep insecurity about my character and my need to prove myself worthy of existence by being good enough. This is a neurotic way to go about personal development commonly triggered by trauma and there are lots of people like me who respond this way to trauma by trying to prove their worth through various means.

If somebody actually is secure about their self worth and they are content with living a normal life with nothing spectacular, then they might feel they don't need personal development.

[Reciprocality]

5 hours ago, Rishabh R said:

I have a question that why do normal people don't follow personal development work and even a tiny amount of them who do just scratch on the surface of it and later call self-help as non- sense. 

By self-help I mean meditating consistently, reframing failures, practicing emotional regulation at the times of stress.

Thank you in advance for the replies 😂.

@Rishabh R Because their development and maturity does not hinge on deliberate constructions of the gimmicks and platitudes they justifiably associate with self-help.

It is on you to determine whether they are doing personal development via analysis of their practice, and this happens independently of peacocking on forums.

 

Edit: chances are high that their development can occur without needing any of the words, abstractions, phrases, sub-cultures and beliefs associated with "self-help" or "spirituality" or whatever have you.

Edited June 21 by Reciprocality

[Reciprocality]

Something else should also be clear: the world does not work in such a simplistic way that you can infer from someone not meditating that they have not integrated the benefits you associate with meditating from your own practice. The most general comprehension of the principle your assumption about meditation or self-help in general apparently violates is "modus tollens" which then yield the fallacy of "denying the antecedent".

[Rishabh R]

1 hour ago, trenton said:

@Rishabh R

If somebody actually is secure about their self worth and they are content with living a normal life with nothing spectacular, then they might feel they don't need personal development.

I find this perspective as valid.

[Basman]

Most people don't even know that personal-development is an option that exists or they think it is too good to be true and think it is a scam.

[Princess Arabia]

"Normal people", as you put it, are probably less neurotic than spiritualists and something in their sense of self probably realizes there's no one there that needs fixing, but they can't put a handle on it. They don't know this. The sense intuits it on it's own. Since spiritualist and self-help junkies have a bit of neurosis in that sense of self, they call people normies and the rest high conscious, spiritual and knows better because they work on themselves. Another form of delusion. 

Nothing wrong with it, but there's nothing to fix or work on because this is already perfection. Even the fixin' and the improvements is perfection. Either way, it's perfection.

[Javfly33]

They might be too busy with their lives: kids, job, etc...also a lot of people are very comformists. 

[Sandhu]

Low intelligence 

[samijiben]

Think reciprocality has some good insight here

Part of this path is not judging people. That being said, lots of people are simply low conscious, and this is hard to debate, especially when you see the desperation & misery worn on their face as they scroll through their phone. Reminds me of zombie from movie or call of duty: zombies.

I would say that EVERYONE is doing self-help. Everyone is helping themselves! It's just a matter of degree & quality & content. Not a lot of people are gonna be doing THIS PARTICULAR BRAND of self-help, which highlights mysticism as the core & foundation of "personal success."

Most people are doing self-help by building themselves up. We are doing it by taking ourselves down. Obviously the former is more attractive.  Who tf wants to delete themselves out of existence?

[trenton]

3 hours ago, Sandhu said:

Low intelligence 

Is it not convenient of us to believe that people who not interested in personal development like us are less intelligent?

[Alexop]

18 hours ago, Rishabh R said:

I have a question that why do normal people don't follow personal development work and even a tiny amount of them who do just scratch on the surface of it and later call self-help as non- sense. 

By self-help I mean meditating consistently, reframing failures, practicing emotional regulation at the times of stress.

Thank you in advance for the replies 😂.

Because self-improvement is not football. It challenges your ego, it does not enforce it. And most people don't want to give up their ego, they want to convince themselves they do it but they actually don't.

Doing this work properly implies denying your needs sometimes which is very hard work. This is why most people will never succeed in this work.