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Below is an essay written by a helicopter trained in poor-weather. He seems to have a lot of knowledge and experience. He integrated all the facts so far with his personal experience to create a plausible story of what may have happened. In particular, I find the end of the story very interesting. To me, there are aspects of self actualization. A brief summary: -- Shortly after takeoff, there was a thin haze and the pilot decided to fly under "Visual Flight Rules" (VFR). This means the pilot must fly under the dense fog/cloud layer. The alternative was to fly via "Instrumental Flight Rules" (IFR). This would have been the safer route, however the downside is that it takes a lot longer. The pilot must wait for controller instructions. The instructions may create much longer circuitous routes. And they have had to wait in line to proceed. Kobe Bryant's notoriety is a nonfactor for waiting times. The waits and circuitous route can add hours to a trip - it is unknown how much of a delay there would be. So, there was an early decision waying risk and reward. At the start of the trip, there was a thin layer of haze, so the risk may have seemed small and they decided to go VFR rather than deal with unknown delays with IFR. As well, if the conditions worsened (which they did), the pilot can fly very low along highways that cut through mountainous territory. -- As conditions worsened. The pilot flew very low along highways. The highways are in valleys between rising hills and mountains. So the pilot can fly low along a highway and they are safe, even if he can't see rising hills/mountains flanking the highway. -- There were two small airport spaces, they had to wait for clearance. I find it interesting that the air traffic controllers did not tell the helicopter pilot to land. I don't know air traffic control regulations and who has authority. Perhaps the air traffic controllers did not have authority to tell the pilot to land. Alternatively, the conditions around the airport were not not bad, and the helicopter later encountered a small niche of very bad conditions. -- They got within 15 miles of the destination, yet they needed to veer off the highway. The two main factors are: 1) they had to leave the underlying highway that they were using as a reference point. As long as they flew along the highway, they were safe and 2) they entered a pocket of low dense fog. The pilot likely knew that there were hills/mountains rising around him, that he could not longer see. He gained elevation, yet by doing so he lost his reference point. This is the most interesting part to me: without his visual reference point, they enter a "groundless" state. Not groundless in the sense of being in the air. Groundless in the sense of no reference point. . . They were now in a groundless Nothing. They couldn't orient/ground themselves in reality. The pilot knows hills/mountains are around yet is in groundless Nothingness. . . . A pilot may feel like they are veering left, or right. Or the pilot may feel like they are rapidly gaining altitude. This can lead to anxiety and panic, even in a trained pilot. . . The pilot veered to the left and made a rapid decent. The author speculates that the pilot panic and needed a reference point. Fearing a mountain ahead, or wanting to circle back to retreat, he may have veered left and down. . . He flew into a hill/mountainside. . . The author wrote that the pilot could have vertical descended, yet due to instrument malfunction or panic took a rapid left word decline. I don't have this type of helicopter direct experience, yet it sound eerily similar to the groundless state entered with psychedelics. And how the human responds: there can be an intense anxiety/panic with an intense desire to get out of the groundless state of nothing/not knowing - and to desperately grasp for a point of reference to give a sense of grounding in reality. http://nymag.com/intelligencer/2020/01/kobe-bryants-helicopter-likely-succumbed-to-common-danger.html

Nothingness guided me well. Or effortlessness. For me the intuitive sense of the guru's guidance is the most powerful

Intro: God almighty this trip was so beyond anything I’ve ever encountered on psychedelics… It’s like all of my prior trips have been preparing my energy systems (whatever this even means) to handle deeper and deeper experiences of what consciousness really is. This trip was beyond enlightenment and in fact had literally nothing to do with absolute truth. Instead, it felt like a hurricane of information and energy exploring various facets of what form is at an individual, collective, and existential level as well as the dynamics that are propelling evolution forward… I’m still deeply shook at how much of a mindfuck this was. During the absolute fury of the peak, a poetic line came to me “Be with the breath of opportunity unsung” which will make more sense after reading the report. There were also more minor insights regarding divine feminine stage orange attraction and seduction that I’ll discuss… Which were interesting in that I saw their connection to the greater intelligence running through humanity even though on the surface it feels unrelated to the larger themes that emerged. Overall this trip was dark but so fucking beautiful. Set: To understand what it truly means to let go and how to do it (see Leo’s video on letting go) Setting: My room, my music, and my cat Themes that emerged: - Letting Go for the Collective Consciousness of Humanity - Healing the Collective Through Life Purpose - Impermanence and True Death - Divine Intelligence - The Nature of Detachment - No PMO and the Divine Feminine - Attraction, Seduction, and Evolution Letting Go for the Collective Consciousness of Humanity: As I was contemplating what it truly means to let go, the psychedelic effects were starting to build and build. Suddenly, rather than receiving any clear insights as to what letting go was, I started having visions and I mean VISIONS about other human lives, and the tragedy that befell them. I started seeing how much suffering was never actually processed upon their deaths, how much regret has accumulated on the death beds of millions perhaps, and how much opportunity for growth and actualization was never actually manifested. I felt the magnitude of how many souls never got to be their best self, and how much sheer sadness was felt by the individuals in these circumstances. I had 3 particularly powerful visions, one was of a middle eastern holy man who was searching for God, for Allah, but who had seen through the dogma of orthodox Islam and was instead searching for God within himself, aka enlightenment. Unfortunately, he was beaten to death by fundamentalists, his journey towards enlightenment never fully actualized. I saw a girl in Syria whose life was utterly demolished by the civil war and who will never quite heal from the tragedy. I saw a man on his death bed who died alone, crying because he never told the woman he loved how much she really meant, and thus never had the life or family he so deeply desired. Interestingly, I saw these not only as visions but as myself. I was that holy man, that girl, that hospital man. Perhaps these were past lives/alternative lifetimes I’ve lived, I’m unsure. As I felt this infinite sea of regret, and lost opportunity, I started crying and crying and crying, as though my body and mind were letting go of the anguish through my tears. It was like by acknowledging and fully feeling the suffering, I was healing a collective wound in our collective psyche. It was as though the body and mind system were letting go on behalf of humanity. I know this sounds weird as fuck, but it what the experience authentically felt like. In this storm of emotion, the line came “Be with the breath of opportunity unsung.” It felt like God was speaking to me, and finally told me how to let go. You just have to be. Be with regret, be with sadness, be with suffering, be with whatever arises, and it shall pass. Healing the Collective Through Life Purpose After the line came to me, I saw how absolutely lucky I was to be where I am. I saw how utterly appreciative I am for finding my life purpose and having the life I have. Like fuck man… There is so much untapped potential in humanity, so many lost opportunities for beauty, actualization, truth realization. While I was mulling over this situation humanity has found itself in, I was struck with what felt like an insight, that by living my life purpose, by living my best life, I was healing this particular wound in humanity. I am humanity. Every human life that’s been lived has been mine. So by taking this time, this life, to truly live, to truly actualize, I am honoring my past regrets and mistakes as other souls, and other lives. And somehow, if I can just live this life to its fullest, that will help heal humanity. Whether this is true I don’t really know. I don’t really understand what this collective domain of consciousness I stumbled into is, but all I can say is my life purpose work no longer feels like it’s simply to help me live my best life, but it’s an way for humanity to actualize. My work feels even less like its for the greater good of human potential and opportunities unsung, so to speak. Impermanence and True Death Interestingly, this trip very much solidified how absurd the notion of death is. I have zero doubt anymore that I will continue living lives after this one, and that we are all on a journey of experience as God. So no there is no such thing as true death, and yet… there is. You see, there is no more Consilience after I die. Everything that constitutes my individuality will be lost to the void of nothingness. I will never, ever, EVER as God, get this lifetime back. Impermanence is final. This lifetime, all the quirks of this body, mind, and spirit will be gone upon physical death. And there was a deep existential sadness to that. As I was wrestling with this fact, I felt like my consciousness kept slipping between ego and God, and I remember reflecting from this phase of the trip that God is actually somewhat sad about its creations truly coming to an end. But somehow that it could be no other way.. I’m not really sure exactly what I was experiencing here. On one level, I could feel ego sadness, sadness that this life would end because selfishly, I love this life, I love the journey I’ve gone through so much… But it felt more than that. There felt like an existential sadness beyond the ego that acknowledged this creation’s end, and acknowledged the sadness, as though a parent hugging a child who lost their most beloved stuffed animal. Sure, it doesn’t really matter, but does matter. Death is really it man, this life will be gone. Divine Intelligence So throughout these previous three themes, it was as though consciousness kept slipping around between what felt like individual egoic consciousness, the collective consciousness of humanity, and existential divine consciousness. I become consciousness of how much intelligence is at play with the form of ego, humanity, and god. This felt very… shallow in that all I could tell was that there IS an intelligence doing something. Evolution is building towards something, presumably enlightenment, but even that I’m not really sure. Something is moving the collective energy of humans forward though into something beyond description or understanding. Humans are evolving towards some kind of divine actualization, but what this end game is really all about, I remain unsure of. I was left feeling the threads of this intelligence pulsing through my body and mind, and through the psyche of humanity… And that this suffering and movement we humans have gone through is part of this plan. Yet plan as we humans traditionally think of the word is not what I mean by the word plan… I’m unsure how to communicate this anymore. The Nature of Detachment Detachment is like a principle at play which drives letting go forward. It became so obvious, however, that if detachment leads one towards being unemotional, dry, and neutral towards life, that this was in fact a twisted form of attachment. Shutting one’s self off from care, desire, lust, and expectation is a form of attachment; one is attached to the denial of these things. True detachment is being with whatever arises, including those aforementioned feelings. As one does more consciousness work, these types of feelings will begin to fade, but even when they arise, it’s important to simply be with them, feel them fully, and let process through the body/mind on their own. No PMO and the Divine Feminine A bit of a random turn on this trip. Quitting PMO has been a pretty big focus in my life right now so I guess it makes sense that it came up. Well I was thinking the habit and what it actually represents. And I noticed something interesting about the nature of women attracting men. Women love seducing men, they love being able to be sexy, and grab the attention of men. And yet paradoxically, a woman loves it when a man doesn't actually need her and can say no to the seduction. If you succumb so easily to her seduction, this will unconsciously be seen as weak… In order to attract a woman, she wants you to be able to be extremely turned on, but have the groundedness to not need it. And I realized that porn is like a collective manifestation of the divine feminine seducing men and that by succumbing to this habit, I am essentially telling the divine feminine I NEED her. Which is not honoring the masculine energy inside. I know this is kind of a twisted thought story of an explanation, but these were the dynamics I felt. Saying no to porn is the equivalent of acknowledging the beauty of feminine but not needing her, which is the most attractive thing I can do as a man. When I feel the energy and need to cum with porn, rather than falling prey to this seductive feminine pull, saying no leverages me into masculinity, into the non-neediness that a true man possesses. The pull to jack off to porn is the creative force, the shakti, the divine feminine seducing the devil inside of me, but a true man can sit in the face of this creative energy, because he is strong to face it, to be with it without action. Perhaps this was all just a poetic, psychedelic framing for why I should quit PMO lol. I will continue to work on eliminating this habit. Attraction, Seduction, and Evolution So I realized various nuances of attraction and seduction. I saw how flirtation strategies through speaking, body language, touch, eye contact, and texting literally infiltrate the mind and get the other person to think about the other. It’s not necessarily worth getting into the specific here because quite frankly, a lot of the information I gained was entirely intuitive and I would need to spend more time processing to put it all into language. Somehow, I’ve walked away from this trip with more knowledge on to be attractive and seductive to a woman, as well as how to respond to the attractive and seductive tactics of a woman towards me. These mind games feel very SD stage orange. I saw that by participating in this game, I would be necessarily acting devilishly. And yet, this is entirely fine. As long as I am respectful and kind hearted in the end, there’s nothing really wrong with this game. Moreover, during the trip I kept seeing how these tactics of attraction were literally propelling the future of humanity forward through its evolution. It’s like I kept zooming into the nuances of attraction, and the zooming out to the long term consequences of this game through the creation of families and future children. It t’was weird. Outro: If you’ve read all of this, kudos. I’m left feeling a stronger pull to self-actualize, not for only for myself, but for the humanity that resides inside my consciousness, inside of all of us. The last thing I’ll leave you all with is a poem I wrote at about the 7 hour mark of the trip that I felt encapsulated the experience: Be with the breath of opportunity unsung I write this for those who’ve lost their lives For those that never saw their souls shine This serenade out to the divine feminine Who creatively wrought out our end in sin But through this end, and through this death We see through her eyes consciousness yet Yet here I am, a single witness to this all This sea of infinity This breath completely unsung

God/Oneness/Consciousness/Nothingness/Infinity is Love God is creation itself. God is selflessness itself. God is Love. No, ego is the prism which polarizes God's Infinite Absolute Love into limited, finite, material love. Absolute Love is like pure white light. Once that Love materializes into some formed thing, or through some finite creature, that Love is made finite and selfish. It is exactly like shining pure white light through a prism which polarizes it into many lesser discrete colors. The love shining through all humans is like the color blue or red or yellow. But God's Absolute Love is white, containing all the above, being the Source. So when God's Love shines through a dirty prism like Hitler or Trump -- that's what love looks like in its finite form. When God's Love shines through a pure lens, it looks like that of Jesus or Buddha. Ego is the lens/prism. When you realize that ego isn't real, its like removing all prisms from the path of the light, allowing it to shine white. The clearest telescope is one which has no lens at all. The clearest lens is Nothingness! When your lens is Nothingness, you are Truth, you are Love, you are God. You stop looking at things, you BECOME the things you used to look at. Yes, God's Creation is completely selfless. Since all selves are imaginary.

Find the one who is asking the question (you) and watch him until you realise that he who is seen cannot be the seer, and that what is being watched, is not you. And allow yourself to drift into the ocean of silent nothingness (only when it feels natural) Intuition is so fucken important

I am here until all of humanity awakens, then my mission is complete and i return back to nothingness.

So yesterday I had my first 5 meo dmt experience. And boi it was intense. My first thought when the effects started was "what have I gotten myself into", then really fast everything turned into infinite perfection and nothingness. When I came back I found myself looking in the mirror telling myself how much I love everything. And earlier that day I also had my first awakening expereince from meditation that was deeper than my previous experiences with regular dmt. And two weeks earlier I also had a dmt experience where I got the insight that I should try 5 meo dmt. And now I know why I had that insight. Seems like it all hangs together XD.

I initially just intended to do this trip for fun before I put aside enlightenment to totally set my mind for financial independence. But ironically this trip spoke for itself. I'm not bragging but this final trip of mine could possibly (to some degree) be compared to Leo's ego collapse trip. I tripped on this substance for 7 times before but never expected it to be this fucking scary and so powerful that it made me create room for changes for my normal daily life Preparations and Settings: I did not eat anything for the whole day. I did the trip at night to not be disturbed at all. After taking the substance which is unique ( I had to put in real effort to persuade my uncle doctor (- not real uncle but I love him like an uncle) to provide me this substance on one condition: I would not overdose on it. Unlike other psychedelics which take at least 30 minutes to take effect this one takes less than 5 minutes to give me the trip. The amazing thing about this substance is with enough mind training you can keep your ego's self when tripping if you want and the trip's quality is not hurt. You can even choose to pause the trip at any stages of the trip. My theory is with enough training I can choose to keep the substance in my body forever. But I'm not that damn good yet. It leaked out anyway@@ First 3 hours of the trip: I became conscious of my own psyche plus shadow side plus the MIND so thoroughly to the extent I could read myself and I DID. I read myself to every minute detail. Every detail of my character was exposed. Not a single minute detail escaped the substance's power. All sexual cravings I suppressed were taken out. Had it not been for the mind training I did with this substance before I would have masturbated. Stage 2 is when a real monster comes. I willingly surrender myself psyche and and my MIND completely. I don't know where they went to. I just knew I could surrender them. The moment my MIND was taken away my body felt it, very clearly. Almost felt like I was thrown from outer space to my bed Less than a minute the MIND was taken away, I felt like I was my father!!! Not totally but my right hand felt to me exactly like his hand. I guess after the MIND was got rid of all left in me was genetics. Yet this was not the scariest part My body parts started to vibrate and talk to each other@@@!!. Some parts wanted to be dissolved into nothingness like the mind some did not. But I lost the control. My body kept shaking inside out and finally a scary silent mode occured. I got informed by some mysterious source that If I continued this way my entire body would be dissolved. Luckily my MIND was not totally killed. I finally managed to send the stop order to the whole body system. My sexual cravings have been increased too much by the trip, to the extent I quite regret taking this trip. I live in Vietnam where the cheapest price to have an intimate bodily relationship with a pretty massage girl is at least 30u for 1 hour!

@DreamScape If I focus on it, it makes the sensation stronger and very slowly move up, I can probably force it up with some breathing technique, but focusing on it might do the trick. Lets meditate for a few hours then. Since I have meditated on infinity, ALL my fears went away the next day because I realised the fear was rooted in the nothingness, I wonder what the Kundalini will do to me if it is actually going to happen. I am so curious...

A few other good ways to look at all of this: If you realized you are the Creator of all that Is, all that was and all that will be (even if both of these things can only be what Is), how would the chimp mind respond to it? How would it look at itself and the world if it new that it was the origin of all of it and that it deemed all of it Perfection? Now add the realizations that you are Infinte and that you are all of it. You are all the rapists, you are Hitlers. And not only that, you have commanded for there to be Infinite rapists and Hitlers. Now add to that the realizations that all of you will return to the Source, that all that Is is necessarily impermanent. That all Creatures that exist will return to the Infinite Source of Nothingness. What would that do to the chimp mind? What would it do to the ant mind? What would it do to the lions mind? What would it do to the dolphines mind? Additionally you will realize the dharmic nature of reality. That all that Is has it's place and that it is placed perfectly. That there is no an inch of misplacement in all of Infinite existence. This is Dharma. It means that all Creatures, all Things and all Non-Things serve their Purpose perfectly. The lions purpose is to eat the gazelle. The gazelles purpose is to suffer as it is eaten. That all of them are playing their role perfectly. That the carnist is seeking to remain carnist. The vegan is seeking to abolish animal exploitation. All of them are playing their part perfectly. If it is your purpose to look at yourself and your authentic expression, you will realize you are one or the other and either way you will be playing your role. You will be the Leo justifying selfishness or you will be the vegan criticizing him. It all is perfect and it all has it's play. Evolution will take care of the rest, by itself. We are not seperate from Evolution, we are the process of Evolution. This is inescapable, although similar to Psychological Self-Acceptance there is Psychological Dharma. Psychological Dharma will lead to Sukha, which is one of the ways Reality manifests it's Will. It manifests it by Suffering, and you shall suffer if you do not follow your Dharma, even if it is not possible to not follow it. Psychological Dharma, much like Psychological Self-Acceptance, can be the case or not be the case. It's like you will follow the laws of gravity no matter what, however you can jump. Just expect gravity to pull you back if you resist it. Psychological Dharma is a problem for humans not so much for animals. Animals in the wild are usually in perfect accordance with their Dharma. A bird will not contemplate why it needs to make new babies and raise them. An owl will not contemplate the morality of it's action. Both of them follow their Dharma perfectly, their place in the world. Enlightenment is strange in that it hijacks this psychological dharmic system as the insight leads to a realization of Absolute Dharma, meaning that as I have described all Things in the universe serve and cannot help avoiding to serve their purpose. This can in the chimp mind lead to a great motivation to fullfill ones Psychological Dharma, but it can also lead to a great indifference due to the realization that there is no such thing as more or less dharma. This will be determined by the form of the mind. There is no reason for why we should prepare our psychology before enlightenment or why we should seek enlightenment in the first place. A reason is not necessary, for it is the case anyways. This is the difference between a dharmic understanding and a moral understanding of the world. From a perspective of morality we must justify everything in some way, a dharmic understanding will realize that the existence of it is it's justification. Why expoit animals? Because it is so. Why criticise the exploitation of animals? Because it is so. Not who is right, nor who is wrong. Simply evolution taking place. Reality will conspire to aid you not if you follow some rules of morality, but rather if you follow your dharma. It's interesting because talking and realizing Dharma leads to an alteration of Dharma. It seems to generate a very transrational dynamic, like the Observer vs the Observed. Some people for example will use dharmic concepts to justify their actions. So they will use dharmic concepts and translate them into morality. That itself is in a way dysfunctional, but at the same time it is perfectly functional because it is the dharma of dharma to make people translate it into morality and create religious systems out of it. It's very difficult to put it into linear and casual terms.

@Dylan Page Yes, the ground is Nothingness/Consciousness. The home base is YOU! But it's empty. There's nothing there. There is no better grounding than Absolute Truth.

Earlier this month I had my second mystical experience. I was watching Leo's guided Neti Neti meditation, and right when he says "you are this infinite nothing", I became this nothingness and realized that the self is an illusion. Although I was nothing, I was everywhere. This was very shocking to me, so it only lasted a few seconds, but in these few seconds I was bombarded with insights, understandings like "ooooooh so this is what teachers meant by nothing and everything; this is why it's incommunicable". But like in the 3rd Ox-Herding picture, I'm not sure if what I had was an enlightenment experience. Although I was this infinite nothing, I didn't identify with all of experience, but simply knew I was the observer and creator of experience. My thoughts are that I experienced a separation between experience and pure consciousness, but I'm not sure if this can be called an enlightenment experience or if it's just an ego death. Is an enlightenment experience and ego death the same thing? Did I see the ox? Did I not? I'm asking myself these questions and would like to hear some opinions that could aid my understanding.

Hello guys. A few years ago I had a panic attack from weed because of the experience of infinity/nothingness. Afterwards I was in the Dark Night of the Soul for about 6 months where I had an ego-death experience every evening. It felt like dying and having your soul ripped out of your Body, there is nothing I could do about it. The Ego backlash afterwards lasted for very long... Now I m able to focus on infinite consciousness (That's what I think it is) while meditating, and I m afraid of it, I fear it, I fear infinity and this night it came up again and it felt like I was in fucking hell. I tried to focus on it, but it was so painful, I had to distract myself after 20 seconds. Most of the time during meditation it just feels really strange, but not necessarily bad. However last night it was so painful my face started burning. Will I have to go through this Dark night again, and how should I continue? Definitely not psychedelics, that would put me through an infinite nightmare. Is this formless thing really what I think it is, or am I just crazy and deluding myself into twisting my mind to hell? Is it normal, that it literally feels like a timeless torture of the soul? Should I take a break or continue going through this torture until it rips my ego apart for good? This shit is truly disturbing, If I have to deal with this every night, I will go crazy before becoming enlightened...

Okay, I m gonna respond to everyone simoultaneously: @electroBeam Yeah I meditated a lot, and during the day I am sometimes able to focus on the nothingness or on the infinity (more rarely) during the day. I am not currently in the dark night of the soul, because I'm just having glimpses at infinity/nothingness. I am not close to a full blown awakening with nonduality. Feeling the infinity during meditation increases the tranquillity of being, however during the night I was feeling nauseous and then infinity came up. Is it possible that it just amplifies all subjective feelings? So that infinity + some feeling/emotion equals infinite emotion? This is what we are supposed to do with love, right? Please correct me if I'm wrong. So basically I have to surrender to it totally, my attachements also come up after perceiving the infinity, I start to realise stuff. The bad part is, when I'm not feeling too good, and some nightmare comes up with infinity. I start to tell myself: I want to suffer if bad stuff happens I don't want to be happy if bad stuff happens, and this is causing me not to be able to surrender to it a 100percent either, I have to contemplate about that even more. @Leo Gura Yes, this stuff comes up usually during the day after meditation, I think meditation brings this up, and the awareness of it makes me contemplate it. Weird shit comes up. I realised all the anxiety I developed during the last years is based on the fear of the total nothingness. I think I should use the consciousness I gained to contemplate about the stuff that comes up, and slowly continue to increase the infinity during meditation. I also realised, that it's the same infinity that came up during fever dreams as a child, that's probably the source of the negative associations my ego has about the formless. I associate it with intense distress/pain/fear, because those were the first time they came up? @Inliytened1 I noticed that the nothingness and the infinity are formless. Now I make the distinction of it, because it just feels different, I believe the infinity facet is way stronger than the nothingness, I experienced those 2 things separately within consciousness/awareness. ( I just noticed you responded to Radical and not to me). I basically just had a glimpse at infinity, a few years ago I had a full blown nondual nothingness experience. (I don't know how to call it). Now some people say "dying" feels good, for me it didn't. The process of the nothingness taking over is disturbing and the few seconds it takes to take over seems sooo long. What aspect of it am I missing? The letting go? Could I just be crazy, and deluding myself into mystical stuff, because psychosis is similar to nondual experience? @remember Yes, I stopped smoking weed, The only reason I had an awakening experience in the first place, was because of the fear, that powered the focus on the subtle nothingness I experienced. I didn't have the Concentration necessary to focus on it back then. The fear made it possible. I rarely have emotions, I experienced something last time I went for a walk in the woods, I would love to be able to combine that with infinity. Rest of the day, I feel nothing, especially when a formless thing comes up. No joy, no sadness, no fear etc. Don't know if that's a good thing, but what can I do. Lol, I'm not sure thinking too much about this stuff is helping. The essence of the Problem is: It doesn't feel good, how can I make it feel good? Because it should feel good. I guess Love? If you guys know how to increase love I'm interested in specific meditations. I'm already using the techniques about Leo's What is Love Video, however I made the commitment to try everything

I'd like to give interpretation on one verse in Quran, forgive me my grammatical mistakes. Human is reflection inside the mirror of someone who stands in front of the mirror. Human is bound to repeat every action after the original one. Of course, he is reflection, and reflection reflects. And human naturally wants to become the one who is in front of the mirror. Human wants to lose heaviness of being a reflection, and just to be the original one, and not a reflection. He wants to simply be... Because the original one is pure being and it is so easy. And for some its even more than that, it is blissful, it is satchitananda. It is joy and love and goodness. Human then calls his reflection nature as ego, illusion, avidiya, ignorance. He spends years to dissolve it, and to become nothingness. What can he do, all gurus he saw taught exactly same thing. But who is that one (the original one) who stands in front of the mirror and sees its own reflection in the mirror? That original one is what people on this forum call God. Echart Tolle calls him God. Mooji calls him God. Rupert Spira and Adyashanti calls him God's Infinite Being. That's why they keep saying that God = you, reality = God, Being = God. But then prophets come and give us text, and then we know - this original one in front of the mirror - it is God of this world, God of this reality, King of this world, or Devil, Iblis. It is The Great Being. It is also an archetype of all worlds. All worlds are reflections of this one original archetype. Also: Ishvara, Shiva, 'Father', Apollos (in arabic - Iblis), Ahura-Mazda, God of light and beauty. And we are his reflections. Our task, prophets say, is not to become him, and not to dissolve our egos in him, but we are ought to emancipate consciousness from him, from Being. We are to oppose him. Because the true God is not him and we receive text about who is that true God. We receive method to emancipate consciousness. This task exists not for us, but we exist for that task. Solving that task will define the meaning of existence. Wait a moment, how can good-love-bliss-truth be the Devil? I don't get it. Good question. The thing is that, God intentionally created reality upon the error. It is made so as a test for people. So people will fix it. The core of the error is good and evil. Verse says: Maybe you love something but in fact it is evil for you, and maybe you hate something but in fact it is good for you. Or in other words, what you think is evil - that is good, and what you think is good - that is evil. What seems like good in this reality, and what you naturally love - this is evil. And what seems like bad and what you naturally hate - this is good. Let's stop on first part - the Good declared as Evil - it is knowledge about that one in front of the mirror - he presents himself as Goodness and Love. But in fact it is Devil. Apollo in Greek tradition is God of Love, Beauty, Harmony, Light. And also he presents himself as Consciousness. But in fact he is not Consciousness. Consciousness exists only as opposition to Being, as a contrast to Being, but not as part of Being, not as equal to Being. Only as opposition and not in oneness, and not in just being. Witness is not is-ness, Witness is separate and opposite to is-ness. Is-ness by its very nature is pointing that it is not witness. Witness cannot be what is witnessed. But this Devil tricks people and presents Consciousness as his own nature by saying some illogical thing like witnessed = what is witnessed. That's not an illusion, its not an illusion that it seems like they are same thing, but it is the result of the fact that Consciousness is suppressed by Being. And, returning to what is previously said, we are to emancipate Consciousness from Being. We receive method, the scripture is that instruction. One of the instructions is: To put names of Allah, the one who is absent, the one who we call Huwa (Kul-huwa-Allahu-ahad), HE, or absent one, to put his names in the focus and centre of our spiritual attention. Graceful, Merciful, Giving, Forcing, Almighty etc. We are interested in putting these names in the centre and in focus of our spiritual attention. To be able to do that, to perform that - leads to emancipation of consciousness. It leads to immediate and to correct awakening, or providential awakening. Its just one of the methods. So this -TRUTH-CONSCIOUSNESS-LOVE - or absolute infinity, or infinite goodness-love, is false orientation, false value and false 'God', an idol. Thats why the witness of faith is la ilaha illallah (there are no gods except Allah) - Except and besides the one whose name is Allah who is radically Separate from reality, Opposite to Infinity, Opposite to Absolute Everything-ness, and radically Transcendent and yet is active here and now through his absence, besides him there is no other immanent Gods. It is denial of idea that any immanent gods including The Great Being are Gods, they are denied as orientation and value. This one, this infinity, or this thing in front of the mirror, or this pure being, or this love, light, truth - is denied. Instead of that, there is Allah as your orientation. And we can know about him and 'get towards' him only through what prophet's scripture revealed (Muhammadar rasulullah). Besides that we don't have tools. Because when we use our natural tools, we almost always reach The Great Being and then call him God and then we try to dissolve into him. Without abrahamic and only abrahamic holy scripture as a method, we fall for idols. Real idol is not statue or image, real idol is that infinite which presents itself as infinitely good Being. But in reality it is just the big candy who said in Quran: 'I will come to them from right,left,back,front and will surely mislead all of them from your path, except thy righteous slaves'. Btw, that's one of the reasons why Moses-Pharaoh collision is so often given in Quran - Pharaoh declared: I am God (things didn't change ever since then as we can see), while his Egyptian priests based their metaphysics around pantheism/nonduality, oneness of Being where Being = God. They were enlightened. And Pharaoh too. And the whole tyrannical Egyptian pyramidal order had roots in their nondual metaphysics. Paradoxically, the metaphysics of 'infinite goodness of the great being' led to tyrannical order, enlightened avant garde created tyranny. Then Moses was sent by true God, he was sent to destroy this pantheistic ideology and political tyranny. But I think the main problem here is this: all or many gurus are advocating for so-called 'positive experience'. They say: to experience, to be spontaneous etc. is positive thing and our main goal in spirituality is experience, and this experience is to be positive. Look, you breath, you walk, you love, you have highs and lows, it is positive. They advocate for positive experiential nature of reality. Because for them, Reality = God. And people fall for that idea of good, they try to find spiritual state where experience will be positive. But la ilaha illallah is advocating the opposite - you should know that there is no positive experience in the field of immanent, even though it feels positive but its not positive from the perspective of Consciousness. You should know that reality is not God. That doesn't put God somewhere away, we wilfully put him in the centre of our attention (through his names) even though he is absent.

My voice is silence, if I become aware of anything other than what i say (nothing), in the mind, i simply ask who is witnessing? This is something the ego-mind cannot hold on to and will eventually melt away in this pure nothingness space ❤️

Well first of all Duality is an illusion... dualities cannot be created when its understood non-duality is all there is. Your explanation/belief of creating dualities this incorrect. Basically it's an incorrect opinion that dualities are being created when they are not. The appearance of individual waves still happens, but they were never apart from the body of the ocean. It was never duel. "The separation never occurred" -ACIM There isn't a self to build up that's the illusion. So yes it's as silly as it sounds the Ivory Tower is being built up, just to be recognized as an illusion. I don't really consider self-inquiry a practice because it's not really something you improve at. But I guess it could be argued otherwise. Either the self illusion is seen through or it is not. If there is a deep enough look at it it can probably be recognized but if it's just a glimpse or an intuition it might not be enough. This information is just pertaining to Awakening there are other benefits from meditation yoga mindfulness practices and Etc. Identification with the body/mind as the self is the illusion. The body-mind can be conditioned to operate heavy machinery, wash dishes, clean houses, seek for enlightenment...etc. The Ivory Tower that is being constructed is the illusion. The funding for construction of the Ivory Tower needs to be cut off. And the tower needs to be recognized as an illusion, hit with a wrecking ball and knocked down... it's Paradigm needs to be shattered like a mirror. The best part is since the construction materials aren't real the deconstruction process doesn't always have to be that painful. ❤ As long as the funding/belief is there the construction will keep going forward. Sometimes the blueprints of the Ivory Tower change to give the appearance of a new spiritual Ivory Tower. The ego says see this is a healthy Ivory Tower... you don't want to tear me down this is the truth. But it is just another illusion trying to rebuild itself as the spiritual Ivory Tower. THIS is all there is and whether Awakening occurs or not it's all happening within THIS. There is no one way is better than the other. THIS is real and unreal it's nothing being everything. It's the absolute. It's unknowable and undescribable. It's a pregnant nothingness being everything. It's complete, it's whole, it's perfection, its completeness, it's Paradise, the kingdom of heaven... Enlightenment/ it's liberation from the egoic self agenda keeping you running on the hamster wheel for your whole life, and seeking for something external to make itself Feel Complete. It makes no sense to reinforce and build up the Ivory Tower just so It can be knocked down. It's easy to see how this can be an issue as everyone is running around reinforcing the Ivory Tower instead of recognizing it's an illusion. "No individual has ever stepped foot through the gateless gate. No one can enter the gateless gate so be nobody" ❤ ?

@Inliytened1 I was Hardcore Seeker for about a year-and-a-half but I could feel myself slowly getting burnt out. I thought to myself I must have came across the truth by now. I remember I kept hearing it's a turning 180 degrees within and a falling away not a gaining of something. So yes I turned within and started self inquiring. Shortly after I recognized that this ME character is just a compilation of ideas beliefs thoughts perceptions and labels I have allowed myself to buy into over the years. It was recognized that the story of ME was not the true ME. Then I started shedding the layers.. it started feeling lighter and lighter so I continued until there was nothing left, Just emptiness or a pregnant nothingness. It's simultaneously recognized there never was an individual ME inside the body... the whole thing was a sham of the Mind. It's recognized the seeking perpetuated the illusion and keeps one distracted from turning within and seeing the truth. This is why the ego is infatuated with seeking externally it knows if the veil is peered through for too long the truth will be discovered about it's non-existence. The seeking actually prolongs the recognition and perpetuates the belief in a separate ME character. At the end of the day it's a recognition that there was nothing to find... and the whole illusion is created in the mind and by energy contracting in the body. ❤

Its an empty fullness...A pregnant nothingness.. When the self fell away it was nothing as everything remaining...

Last night I had a dream where I was was with a friend and we both decided to take LSD. I've taken LSD before and had breakthroughs. The LSD within this dream actually changed the content within the dream. Everything was suddenly recontexulized and I saw Nothingness. I then realized I was inside a dream and woke up.

cool - i was just going to add that yeah - i get what you mean about the "nothingness" is without description, because what you are pointing to is Absolute Infinity - and anything that you imagine it to be isn't it. It would just be another finite thing or an idea. It wouldn't be actually IT. So yeah Being or Infinity or Isness is prior to knowing, but the amazing thing is that You are Being/Issing right now, and it never goes anywhere because it has nowhere to go.

The "nothingness" is without description. It is the absence of me as the observer. Consciousness (from the "I AM" that is with me now) leaves. The only reason that point to it is because of the gap that I notice in time when consciousness returns to me. I think there are two ways of thinking about this. "Consciousness" either exists inside "Nothingness" or "Nothingness" exists inside "Consciousness."

Whats this complete nothingness that you describe? That's something you can only imagine right? And maybe its not because you are coming back to consciousness - maybe its because consciousness never left. Where would it go when its already everywhere and nowhere? To imply that it came back would mean there was somewhere it wasn't. But consider it is infinite. Don't take any of our words for it though it is something You have to discover. (You capitalized) and to discover is the collapse of knowing into Being. The collapse of the relative into the Absolute. The finite into the Infinite.

How is consciousness ever-present if I can cite moments where I am unconscious (Sleep)? If the "I AM's" purest form is void than is their an experience or an observer in that void? How is there no "on/off" switch for consciousness. When I go to sleep "I AM" is no longer there - only complete nothingness. The only reason that I can describe the experience is because I come back to consciousness. Thanks - appreciate your answers - this has been eating my brain :-)

@Inliytened1 well said. Consciousness is ever present, no matter what state you are in. Therefore, from a relative perspective you could say the body is sleeping/ resting, yet Consciousness is ever present during this experience, I think it was Leo who said notice when you’re dreaming and you die there is still an experience of Nothingness, key is there is still an experience. Without Consciousness, no experience would ever be possible. This experience is simply All consciousness through the many forms of finite life.