puporing

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Posts posted by puporing

  2. Posted · Edited by puporing

    you might have a narcissistic parent.. they have this repressed pain body that they're trying to pass on to you unconsciously (so they don't have to look at it because it might be too painful) through all this guilting and blaming that was never yours.

    the short answer is to create some boundaries (harder to do if living together, but you could try to do it mentally first by seeing that the projections speaks more about her past than you) and suggest her to seek counselling or healers at some point.. you can also learn some great tools from folks like Matt Kahn who teaches about how to mindfully engage with this kind of mind but that's a bit more advanced/requires a high state of consciousness from you, and I'd still recommend a combination of boundaries and these other things.

  4. Posted · Edited by puporing

    this is a bit of an aside but sort of related to the topic of teaching:

    you can call me elitist but I don't think "awakening" at the highest levels should be taught to just anyone. people with deep wounds and narcissistic egos can really misuse this stuff, that stuff needs to be dealt with first. if I were ever to teach any of this it would only be to people who show signs of high integrity, maturity, willingness to heal their traumas or narcissism.

    I already somewhat regret mentioning the word "awakening" to my narcissistic control freak parents just to get them off my backs, it already feels like they can misuse this stuff based on what one of them been saying to me, and further guilt trip me about things or disrespect my boundaries. people can use and "understand"/come up with ideas about the word "awakening" from all kinds of places, but totally miss "true Love" nor care about transformation/development (as very few teachers teach this). I honestly don't fking understand why I chose this character some days it's like a ball and chain around my neck, maybe so I really have nothing to look back on and get the heck out of here once this life is over. not as bad of a situation as @Holykael but prob very similar.

    please ignore what I said if this is triggering. I am just frustrated and appreciate you holding space for me.

  5. Posted · Edited by puporing

    it's hard to express the divine feminine and divine masculine both here. I pretty much suppress myself in both polarities and go with the neutral to make my points. why is that? because people get triggered it seems. why is that? lack of integration of the divine feminine and masculine within oneself. when you find and integrate both within you it's the most beautiful glorious thing ever :D.. 

    please try to see the above as my gift to you, one day you'll understand.

  9. Posted · Edited by puporing

    4 minutes ago, Yimpa said:

    How come more selflessness will reveal more beauty? Because your consciousness and love expands -beyond physical limitations. 

    this is the kind of path I took/am taking, however it is harder to do if you have survival stuff to contend with so I have compassion for this.

    and teaching in a selfless manner is yet another level of Love I am still working toward.

  10. Posted · Edited by puporing

    5 hours ago, Moksha said:

    People circle the same glittering diamond at the center of reality, in closer orbits until they finally dissolve into it. Each journey of the absolute is unique, and realizing itself is not restricted to any particular path (not even 5-Me0).

    When the absolute awakens within a form, it dissolves the demons of the mind. Not only is there freedom from suffering, but the brilliance of being effortlessly flows through you. It is an infinite source that floods you with light and dissolves all boundaries. It is the expression of absolute unconditional seamless love.

    All words, until you sink into the absolute within and beyond them.

    :x

    though I disagree about the suffering.. it's less for sure when I'm alone and with others "alike", but more if I allow myself to get dragged into things.

  11. Posted · Edited by puporing

    5 hours ago, Javfly33 said:

    Also let's just not talk about the fact that most projects of software development are absolutely nonsensical, all to try to make money but 0 conscious goals. If at least the job would entail helping to a good cause that its worth it, then it would be more easy to do more than the minimal.

    lol yep. I did a coding bootcamp awhile back and this turned me away from the industry altogether. it can be sorta fun just doing it for its own sake but any "organizations" around it tends to ruin that due to survival. but I get that it can still be a good survival option for some. I think ideally it's best if you have something to work on for yourself (or a very small dedicated team) that you can also make money from.

  12. Posted · Edited by puporing

    @DrugsBunny in every situation you can choose what you see. you could also choose to see the editing of the comment as an act of love. there's always a choice in that. and what is not love is a call for love behind the message. I am not much interested in the game of division as all of what you guys say to each other register in "my consciousness" also and it's like attacking yourself. and even if you're not super conscious of that it is still the case that it is affecting your consciousness. ofc I don't control what you/anyone say, but I can at least try to make peace, consciousness compels me to. you are free to make boundaries from here if it's better for your growth and I frequently do.

  13. Posted · Edited by puporing

    @DrugsBunny I just don't think it's wise to talk about such a personal matter with people who may not have much of direct experience with the topic. like I would just recommend talking to a few gender therapists and trans/two-spirited folks if one is looking for space-holders to process things or additional research. if one hasn't experienced much gender dysphoria in their life how they have this discussion (like asking questions) is going to be very different from those who have.

    my position is more of that you do not need to physically transition to express the gender you want to express, it can be done with more confidence and relating with people on similar pages. and imo from a place of love this approach gives you the most freedom, wholeness, and self-love. because at some point, you might realize very strongly that you contain both the masculine and feminine and neither bodily fixation alone properly expresses the two. that's not to say that you won't still land in a strong preference for living with one over another outward expression after careful considerations (and possibly also related to one's "career" choice besides social aspects), so if one feels that physical transition is the only way to I understand it.

    and I just don't think it's going to lead to more compassion for the OP if you keep on calling people names for their positions, this is going to cause more reactionary responses that is not helpful to OP. there are many ways to shine light on things the wisest are not necessarily to "brute force" your way.

  14. Posted · Edited by puporing

    3 hours ago, Osaid said:

    They only seem dense because you're being dense about your own position. So to you, it seems like anyone opposing your position has to be biased and they must be ignoring all your talking points on purpose. But the only reason you think that way is because you are so hellbent on your own position that you don't even consider that anyone opposing it is actually coming at it from somewhere charitable.

    I don't really want to get into it, but I do want to point out that this place (like many others) currently isn't deemed "safe" for transgender/two-spirit topics, so you don't see people talking about it as a result. this alone does not invalidate it, just like how you wouldn't equate the fact there are very few awakened people on this planet (and unsafe to talk about with most people) that it would make it invalid. I acknowledge however where people are at and respectfully disengage from this discussion in general. 

    @DrugsBunny I acknowledge the difficulty in having this discussion here and I just want to say, I see you and I hope you can find peace within yourself that you don't need approval from others to be certain of your view. please understand that everyone is learning on their own "timelines" and this may be why it can be difficult to get a consensus.

  15. Posted · Edited by puporing

    @Emrie I honor your decision ultimately. I just felt compelled to say, if somehow you decided not to physically transition, it is still possible to express the gender you want to express while in a different body to a large degree. it's possible also you haven't met the right people yet (eg, bisexual men and people who embrace "two-spiritedness") because I've known guys who are bisexual and very loving toward their biological male partner who clearly play the feminine role. but I understand also if you want to go the extreme feminine side it may be harder to do, there are still ways around that like art and cross-dressing, changing to a gender-neutral name. the key is to own it and it can be a beautiful thing. but yeah I also totally get that if it's really clear to you that none of those things are good enough of options that you would want to do the switch more officially.

  18. Posted · Edited by puporing

    @OBEler It's hard to explain it all here. my path generally involves:

    deconstructing this reality

    "psychological" healing/purging of the shadow side

    psychedelic/sober awakenings

    alteration of my perception of this world and identity to match the awakenings

    deepening the study of and embodiment of Love/ego dissolution

    living in accordance with Truth as much as possible

    Generally in that rough order but this process repeats itself in many iterations. 

  19. Posted · Edited by puporing

    lol, ye might not believe me, but my sober consciousness has increased so much these days that I live in this "alien god consciousness" every day 24/7. yes not to the same extent as on a psychedelic or a "temporal awakening experience", but it's so much that I feel fully merged with God's mind that a human possibly can while still here and functioning. There is so much light, beauty, interconnection, vastness (esp when driving/outside), majesty, glory, depth of perception, love, intelligence... and my head feels like it's "tripping all the time". I can pick up what someone says and know roughly where they may be at in their level of consciousness, what "work" lies ahead of them, etc. 

  21. Posted · Edited by puporing

    Wise teachers generally discourage the extended focus on such things when they come, it can be a "distraction" from the hard work of transcending your ego ("powers" tend to enhance it if one is not mindful of this). In greater levels of consciousness "odd abilities" are more just teaching and healing tools, if necessary. But most people are not mature enough to not just use it for egoic purposes and furthering of the distortion that "they're special". So it makes sense they tend to come to those who are a bit more developed.. 

    But hey it's like any "karma", it will all work itself out in the end, so have fun if that brings you joy/self-love. ; )

  22. Posted · Edited by puporing

    @integral If it's like a "true calling" then you would just follow through and be willing to not get paid even for some time on it. It's true many business owners (to start) do not pay themselves and have to work another job while working on their business, I'm not saying that's ideal or anything but that's the reality we live in right now. But I'd still be smart about it before investing in anything too large of your personal funds. You can always start with working with a "startup incubator" organization and test people's reactions to your ideas. And so it depends on your priorities. Some people are in a more "well off" position and they are okay with potentially losing thousands on a business idea just to launch something of their passion; others are more looking for a stable income in which case you would be a lot more careful/conservative about what business to get into in the first place. So the questions to ask yourself...

    What is my primary goal for getting into this? (eg, to replace my current job? to pursue a passion project even if it doesn't "work out"?) Those two things can give you different answers/approaches.

    And if you're not in the position to just quit your job for a few years for this then yeah I would be more strategic about it (eg, testing in smaller scale).

    Also there are some room to play if you incorporate early on and that way if things don't work out (lets say you get on a business loan) it doesn't affect all your personal funds. I would consult a professional on this though as I haven't done incorporation or riskier kinds of business but I've talked to people who have and that's how they reduce risks.

  25. Posted · Edited by puporing

    It's not a sprint but while you're awakening it can feel like "something is not finished", because it is your "higher self" telling you there's more to realize and awaken to. And yeah it can be hard to do it mostly alone too. In my experience every awakening requires integration afterward and for me to bring it to baseline consciousness. That's how I approach it anyway - bring it to baseline (as in, you have processed it enough to not be in a state of conflict with the information you've received) and then go for the "next awakening". And this process can take months or years depending on what you are truly ready for. 

    Also there's much sober awakeings/realizations. Eg, just you reading these words is a kind of awakening. Guidance can come from this plane as much as the others if you tune up the "truth dial" and know where to look.