Oppositionless

The toughest decision I ever made was actually to attempt to get back together with my first soulmate . Let me explain, leaving didn't feel like a choice it was simply a fear response. I think I have OCD triggered by intimacy so the act (not the thought / desire just the act) of getting in a long term relationship was always horrifying. The breakup was essentially designed to be so painful that it forced me to overcome my fear, but that took like 3 years of being roasted. So attempting to get her back was a symbolic way of transitioning into the type of person who is capable of long term partnerships.

Both. The ego is always a little involved, until one day it isn't . Still waiting for that day . It's going to be glorious .

I wonder if you could pay a professional photographer to fix your profile. For me it didn't work because I currently live in a shithole, but if you're in a decent location it might .

Going to yoga and being around conscious women is slowly but surely changing my entire perspective on dating , sexuality and gender. That's why my profile picture is a woman now. If you're conscious low consciousness women will make you feel unattractive, conscious women will make you feel attractive .

Right. People compare death to deep sleep or otherwise unconscious states because they have no other form of reference . They dont realize that those come from the body, and in death there no body.

Sounds like freedom to me.

Did you read Jed McKenna's books or did you arrive at this through some other means

Thoughts are as material or immaterial as anything else. There's only one type of thing , it's somewhat irrelevant what you call it , although some words feel closer to what's really going on.

I'm in awe of reality . McKenna’s quote (corrected and formatted): “…So between now and 2012, over the next 14 years, I look for the invention of artificial life, the cloning of human beings, possible contact with extraterrestrials, possible human immortality—and at the same time, appalling acts of brutality, genocide, race-baiting, homophobia, famines, starvation. Because these systems which are in place to keep the world sane are utterly inadequate to the forces that have been unleashed. … The mushroom said to me once, it said: ‘This is what it’s like when a species prepares to depart for the stars.’ You don’t depart for the stars under calm and orderly conditions. It’s a fire in a madhouse—and that’s what we have: the fire in the madhouse at the end of time. This is what it’s like when a species prepares to move on to the next dimension.”

The woman who loved me passionately and I left in fear didn't cheat on her boyfriend to get back together with me when I tried.

Spend a year pursuing a deeply embodied awakening with psychedelics and hardcore spiritual practice then go to a yoga class, or even better, ecstatic dance if it's available .

I take magnesium NAC and creatine , to me that's the holy trinity.

I think brain.fm is probably more nootropic , the focus signals are more for inducing altered states . @Michal__ really? I want to find out how to have an obe on demand. They're just something that happens to me , it's never worked when I try to do it. also the gateway process itself is one thing, but I was technically just referring to the bare signals on the app . I'm gonna listen to them while doing kriya yoga . And when the electric stimulation device shows up I'll use that while doing kriya . edit: I just saw your reply in the other thread.

Have you tried the Monroe institute's Expand app? Ive been considering getting back into it. I want to find out what would happen if I listen to the signals for an ungodly amount of time , not all at once of course.