bejapuskas

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About bejapuskas

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  • Birthday 04/14/2003

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    Czechia
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    Male
  1. I know there once used to be an active user on this forum from Germany, who mentioned that he was taken to a psychiatric hospital for talking about his mystical states. This was not even one of the hardcore psychedelic users kind of guys who posted while high, no. This was a sober seeker. I hope that mystical experiences get destigmatized in this way, I remember being afraid of talking about my own insights at the beginning, because I was afraid of being hospitalized. It is true that many psychiatric drugs are addictive, they are super expensive, people often cannot afford them. And then they become addicted to them and they are doomed. The drugs are also not as effective, they do not work in the majority of cases. Precision psychiatry is the next step, and psychedelic therapy. Some people are discussing the possible benefits and unique traits of "mentally ill", which is interesting.
  2. @TheDao You generalizing what feminist means is the same as what your notion of feminist (which I do not really even consider feminist) generalizing what men means. Feminist isn't one thing, there are so many branches. Also all men don't rape and hit their family, right. Same thing. You are doing the same thing you hate about others. I have always been told by my teachers in schools, when I was a kid and vulnerable, that boys are raped too, I guess I had very good teachers. But I see where you are coming from. Rape is so common these days in men and women both. So talk about that, there is nothing wrong, it cannot be denied that it happens. People who deny that are not fighting for equality, they are not properly feminist. Do you get it? But outside Europe, where you do not live, the situation is much worse for women. And outside Europe means most of the population, do you get it, how privileged you are? I didn't say you get butt hurt for going to war, you imagined me saying that. I said you get butt hurt by a "feminist" yelling at you. I don't consider that being butt hurt. I see what you mean. But like the people who are politicians and billionaires, those who make it so that you are a slave of capitalism who needs to go to a 9-5 job, these are mostly men. And again, it might be because of patriarchy and these men might suffer. But like do you see how the female perspective is lacking in leadership?
  3. @TheDao Father role is underappreciated only by some extreme female incels who are butt hurt by men or seriously traumatized. These I do not consider feminists, they sure are sad and have their issues, but they are not fighting for equality of the sexes. Real feminists acknowledge the importance of having a good father figure, as not having ones can create people such as Donald Trump. Patriarchy does not mean that men are bad, it means that there are certain expectations imposed upon men that teach them to be toxic masculine from a very young age and certain privileges that are very appearant in 3rd world countries, less so in the West. It is just that you being butt hurt by feminists is much less serious than a woman being physically unable to protect herself from a man who stabs her on a street while people silently watch her die. The same can happen to a man, but that does not mean that fighting for this to happen less to women is wrong.
  4. @TheDao Perhaps you could think of what women refer to as toxic patriarchy as something that imposes expectations upon men, creating oftentimes either suffering weaklings or abusive fathers and leaders from them. Do you resonate with this? Men are also victims of patriarchy.
  5. @StarStruck Them belittling male rape victims is very horrible, you are right on that, don't stop speaking up for this But they also want you not to belittle female victims who are raped and murdered all around the world. Isn't it common sense?
  6. @AlwaysJoggin Yeah that was also a mistake from your side though. I mean, she told you not to... Ended up enjoying it, but she told you not to. You have to respect that. You never know how people feel or what they have been through, this is not proper consent. How does it happen that you just slip in if you didn't even have foreplay and she is probably not so wet? I am confused. Maybe you also didn't feel comfortable eating her out, I don't know... But yeh you both did some mistakes and she is manipulative, which I can understand why she might be. Just learn from this and move on.
  7. @TheDao I wasn't talking about 3rd way of feminism, I was talking about feminism in 3rd world countries. In US and EU the gender gap is far less than in most countries (most countries are poor by the way if you did not know). If you look at how serious that is, you might actually start sympathizing. I am not denying men's issues, they directly affect me. But like the word feminism is so broad, there will be feminists who body shame men, who belittle suicide and shit, and those are not feminists imo, they don't understand equality. But like also understand that just like so many men hate women because "they have been rejected", so many women hate men (they also generalize), because they raped them. And of course women rape and women rape men! The number is much less, but like sure, the statistics do not justify the individual cases, right, it is subjective trauma and damage still, even if it is less common. But like from the POV of somebody who is traumatized by men, it is very hard to open up to something like men's rights advocates. Just like it it super hard for you to understand some ways in which feminism manifests.
  8. Day after my birthday, on the 15th of April, I was sitting at a laptop and listening to a speech of our head of college - she was announcing that we will all have to return to our home countries a month earlier, because of exams being cancelled and the increasingly worse pandemic situation in India. It was a very sad moment, since I thought there was still so much more left for me to explore and discover on campus and in India, yet the opportunity was not there for me anymore. (only next academic year) I am now sitting back inside my house in Czechia and I feel the need to self-reflect on what happened, since there were many big moments of growth and value awakenings for me. The school got me to reconnect with my creativity and imagination. Since the faculty and students at the school were not as hierarchically different at our school and we were not meant to be polite, there was more confidence in people overall and less fear of judgement. In my opinion, that's a great environment for creativity to develop. Also, my theater teacher was so amazing and he showed us a theater company called Complicité, (which means completely in sync in French) which happened to be very spiritual and made me have psychedelic state vibes in classes. All of this inteconnected my mind so much, made me more connected to others, better at collaboration and much other fancy stuff. I also started valuing art much more. My literature teacher showed me how well art can be used for education and spiral development if one reads fiction books that present very different perspectives. (for me this was non-western books from the Middle East, Africa, Japan and India) Being the only white person in class with all these people constantly calling me out on subtle and less subtle racial and other biases got me to go very deeply into exploring green and basically social justice in general. By being in this class and also by seeing the amount of poverty I saw in Mumbai, Delhi and Pune, I realized my privilege as a white person and more deeply realized how much devilry there is in the people who are world leaders, as well as how important it is to educate the future generations about this, because they might become the next world leader. And art can be a great tool for doing that. My view on feminism also changed drastically. Before, I saw feminists as privileged white women who complain about petty things. Now, I realize how serious gender issues are in the world for both men and women and how everybody is in one way or the other a victim of patriarchical society and its expectations and values. I started reading an Indian feminist book, which I would never consider doing before, I would probably say to myself that it is useless. I am also making many notes on it, which really helps me to cure my insecurities about girls calling me out. Being in my first healthy relationship (with a girl of colour) who always explained some social justice stuff to me when I was triggered or angry or misunderstanding also helped a lot and I think that working on my insecurities in this way made me happier, more developed in life and also able to have a healthy relationship with a girl finally after all these years. Key statement: a feminist is by definition also a humanist. Realizing my own privilege is also connected to what I realized in philosophy class, where we talked a lot about consciousness, life and what it means to be human. I realized how much every single life matters, not just black lives of white lives or animal lives, but literally all lives. I stopped believing things such as that my family is more important than other people or other biases. I feel more responsibility to be politically and environmentally conscious and to align my life purpose with helping and educating others about the value of life.
  9. Did you also eat her or finger her before going inside? I mean it can be hard to stay hard doing that but perhaps you can switch once or twice, until she orgasms and then go. She might be traumatized and need some understanding from others to heal but yeh, probably not a girlfriend for you.
  10. For me the best thing for becoming more feminist was to read more feminist, non-western books and travel to India. Perhaps you are triggered by entitled privileged white women who get angry at you when you pay for their food, because they start thinking you are denying their financial independence by doing that. That can be incredibly annoying, especially if you would personally enjoy people to pay for your food, so you do it for them, but they blame you. By reading some non-western feminist books, fiction and non-fiction, (does not really matter, since you can deduce the global issues from the plot of the fiction as well as the non-fiction) you introduce yourself to the environment where the gender inequality is much more serious, for example the Middle East, India, Africa etc... You might realize then how serious the gender issues are, how much worse off a woman is in India, or Africa or the Middle East than the average guy, how more dangerous it is to be a woman, how you cannot even go out etc... And after that you might become more sensitive and understanding of why feminism exists. The gender issues might not be as easily visible in Europe or North America, but they are fucking real. The second thing was travel, which is kind of irrelevant now, but it was also a very strong stimulus. When I was travelling by a cab in Mumbai with a friend, it was nighttime and I saw this huge slum on my left and all these suspicious people walking around, like I was so fucking scared, even though I was a guy and I was inside a car. Mumbai is probably one of the most dangerous places on Earth to be a woman, New Delhi is the most dangerous one, it is called the "rape capital" by some people. That just got me to realize how lucky I am to be a guy and to not be a part of that huge rape statistic. But hey, guys also get raped, guys also are treated unequally, they commit suicide more often than girls do, (even though girls have more failed attempts than guys) there are so many unhealthy societal expectations imposed on guys, their self-worth is often defined by how much sex they have and nothing else etc... There are so many problems. Plus gender is a social construct and this binary division is problematic and offensive. If you resonate with this, look at one of the definition of feminism: "the advocacy of women's rights on the ground of the equality of the sexes." Equality of the sexes, you see, not supremacy of one or more. It is called feminism, because it advocates for the female perspective which guys sometimes don't understand in terms of gender equality. I assume there is something that advocates for the male perspective too that females don't get and also LGBTQI+ which advocates for the queer perspective which straight people often don't get. Feminism is not there to smash patriarchy and kill guys and cut off their penises. People who think that are not feminists, they are just committing misandry, and that is not nice. (but you must sometimes understand that that is the female version of incel and you might have been an incel yourself in the past so there is that...) Anybody who is a feminist is also a humanist. <3
  11. Everyone is delusional to some extent, but Leo Gura is not building a cult, you can stop watching his videos and using this forum any time you want, he will not try to manipulate you into watching his content, although people can get addicted to it.
  12. I would say this is the case with each and every relationship, don't you think. There are no two people who are absolutely the same or completely different. There will always be opposites and similarities. What point are you actually trying to make?
  13. Just have a conversation with them. I don't think making racist jokes is always a sign of being racist. Sure, it can offend somebody, but if you make these jokes when nobody else hears them and it is clear that the other person is not racist? I agree with what flowboy said. But then again, just talk to them about it, try to understand where they are coming from. For example they might be from a racially homogenous background wher racist jokes almost never offend anyone and everybody makes them, they are normalized. (although the people who make them might not be racist) That friend might not know from experience that this can be a problem, do you understand what I am trying to communicate? I think racism, homophobia and any sort of discrimination comes from lack of exposure. What my girlfriend did with her mum was that she told her to go hitchhiking with a lesbian (her mum used to be homophobic) and she actually did it and changed her mind.
  14. I guess your own feeling, the feeling of the other person and whether you are both on the same page about what is happening.
  15. It can happen sometimes that you start liking something or someone you wouldn't have thought you could ever like, but it feels nice and there is no reason why you should judge yourself for it.