What causes someone to be an A-sexual?

[ZenAlex]

- Have no desire for close relationships

- Rarely/Never get lonely

- I'm not attracted to people to any significant degree. Never had a crush on anyone as long as I can remember. I don't feel aroused by looking at others.

- Never really get sexually frustrated.

- Never get close to others

- I have a social job, and have learned social confidence, but even now, I only socialise out of work maybe once per month.

I was never heavily abused or neglected as far as I can remember.

May it just be brain damage?

 

P.S. This is not a recent thing, this is pretty much how I've always felt. I've been on different diets ect, it doesn't change anything. My blood tests indicate no nutrition deficiencies. 

I don't want watch porn or masturbate very often, was never an addict.

 

Edited February 8, 2023 by ZenAlex

[NoSelfSelf]

As far as i know asexual gets aroused only if hes in emotional attachment with someone....

I have few points on the list but im not asexual...

[ZenAlex]

2 hours ago, Judy2 said:

@ZenAlex

"brain damage" makes it sound so negative and implies judgment. i suggest you try and research the topic without holding onto any preconceptions at the back of your mind.

as far as i know, even asexuality is a spectrum and it probably has more to do with (neuro)diversity than any mental defects or illnesses.

when it comes to your social life in general, in my opinion it would still be useful to look into that. perhaps this type of behaviour comes natural to you and needn't be changed, or this is something you may want to work on. 

I have already researched the topic, but the research doesn't give a clear cut answer for me.

I never meant to trigger you.

I simply said brain damage could be a contributing factor, I cannot prove that it's true, just like you cannot prove that it isn't. You shouldn't rule it out because it mind offend others to hear.

I'm willing to consider numerous possibilities. 

Edited February 8, 2023 by ZenAlex

[Roy]

4 hours ago, ZenAlex said:

May it just be brain damage?

"Damage" is a stark way to put it. But I wouldn't be surprised if there is some kind of neurological pathway that is absent or didn't get activated growing up. Asexuality is an unusual thing.

However humans are unusual. It's not impossible out of millions and millions of people you will have outliers, it's a guarantee actually.

[Nilsi]

5 hours ago, ZenAlex said:

- Have no desire for close relationships

- Rarely/Never get lonely

- I'm not attracted to people to any significant degree. Never had a crush on anyone as long as I can remember. I don't feel aroused by looking at others.

- Never really get sexually frustrated.

- Never get close to others

- I have a social job, and have learned social confidence, but even now, I only socialise out of work maybe once per month.

I was never heavily abused or neglected as far as I can remember.

May it just be brain damage?

 

P.S. This is not a recent thing, this is pretty much how I've always felt. I've been on different diets ect, it doesn't change anything. My blood tests indicate no nutrition deficiencies. 

I don't want watch porn or masturbate very often, was never an addict.

 

Have you tested your testosterone levels?

[zurew]

5 hours ago, ZenAlex said:

I don't want watch porn or masturbate very often, was never an addict.

This statement suggest to me, that you are not asexual, because you are not saying that you never want to masturbate and you are not saying either, that you never get aroused by anything. Considering all the text from your post I assume you are not asexual, you just have a very low sexdrive.

One question: Were you more horny in your teenage years, or not?

[soos_mite_ah]

People are asexual for the same reason why people are gay or straight, they're just born that way. 

As for having no desire for close relationships and not being able to be close to others, there are all types of dysfunctional reasons why people may feel that way. That's not a part of being asexual. Asexual people still have friends and family they are close to. 

[Eternal Unity]

@ZenAlex It's not brain damage. It's a choice your soul makes before incarnating to this particular lifetime. And the beaury is. it's the most innocent spirit who chooses such an experience. 

I chose such a life for the first 22 years of my life. I was presented with a choice again, while I was still in my body. "Would you like to be sexual?" I said, you know what. lets try it. but for a limited amound of time, say. 10 years. see how it goes because I liked my life fine before all that non sense.

10 years of sexuality past, I decided to stay sexual. for now, at least. I'm 35.

Greg

[Applegarden8]

Other pursuits in life, especially for hardcore spiritual people, very creative people or people that just view life differently or are on the spectrum. 

[ZenAlex]

On 08/02/2023 at 3:30 PM, zurew said:

This statement suggest to me, that you are not asexual, because you are not saying that you never want to masturbate and you are not saying either, that you never get aroused by anything. Considering all the text from your post I assume you are not asexual, you just have a very low sexdrive.

One question: Were you more horny in your teenage years, or not?

Asexual =/= Lacking a sexuality. Do your research.

Edited February 10, 2023 by ZenAlex

[ZenAlex]

On 08/02/2023 at 4:54 PM, Judy2 said:

just to be clear i didn't feel offended or anything:)

i just thought it would be helpful to make you aware of your own personal judgements since you do seem to be emotionally affected by the topic.

I am perfectly aware of them. 

[zurew]

1 hour ago, ZenAlex said:

Asexual =/= Lacking a sexuality. Do your research.

Quote

Asexuality is the lack of sexual attraction to others, or low or absent interest in or desire for sexual activity.

It has multiple definitions, I guess you are in the "or low interest or desire for sexual activity" camp.

So you never had any strong desire or urge to have sex?

[ZenAlex]

23 minutes ago, zurew said:

It has multiple definitions, I guess you are in the "or low interest or desire for sexual activity" camp.

So you never had any strong desire or urge to have sex?

I lack sexual attraction to others and also low interest in sexual activity. 

 

[Espaim]

No it's fine. I feel similar. Also asexual 

[Eternal Unity]

I'm a Romantic Asexual. i'm an Ace

[Emrie]

I suggest you read the book Ace, by Angela Chen. Hands down the most comprehensive, brilliant, book about asexuality I've ever read.

A lot of the statements you made have nothing to do with asexuality. Also, nothing causes anyone to become asexual, people are born this way and it's perfectly normal. I don't know why people get hung up on asexuality but totally accept heterosexuality, homosexuality, and bisexuality. If humans can feel sexually attracted to one kind of people, another kind of people, and all kinds of people, why can't they feel attracted to no kind of people?

On 2/8/2023 at 11:10 AM, ZenAlex said:

- Have no desire for close relationships

- Rarely/Never get lonely

- I'm not attracted to people to any significant degree. Never had a crush on anyone as long as I can remember. I don't feel aroused by looking at others.

- Never really get sexually frustrated.

"Have no desire for close relationships" doesn't make you ace. That might be more aromanticism but not necessarily even that. You might want close relationships with people in general but might never find someone you feel you genuinely want a close relationship with them specifically, which would be aromanticism.

"Rarely/Never get lonely", good for you! I'm jealous you feel that way. But that doesn't have to do with either asexuality or aromanticism.

Full asexuality is that you don't feel sexual attraction for anyone. You have Greysexuality or grey-asexuality if you feel sexual attraction sometimes, very rarely (typically you can count it on your hand even if you've lived for decades). And you have demisexuality if you feel sexual attraction only after having formed a close emotional bond with someone. All of these are separated from your sex drive and libido, you can be very sex-positive and have a high sex drive while being asexual, sex-neutral or even sex-repulsed, it's completely independent from your sexual attraction.

Aromanticism is feeling no romantic attraction. Again you can have a desire for close relationships but never feel that way about a specific person, never having the romantic attraction for anyone in particular. Or you can have no desire.

"I'm not attracted to people to any significant degree. Never had a crush on anyone as long as I can remember." This right here would be asexuality. If you've never felt attraction or had a crush on anyone, that's definitely asexuality.

"Never really get sexually frustrated." Good for you! Some of us are jealous. Has nothing to do with asexuality again though.

Nothing causes anyone to become asexual, and it's perfectly normal. If you have something that you wanna work on, do some introspection, maybe go see a therapist, or anything. Maybe get in touch with other asexuals and ask for their experience and how they feel and all that. That can be helpful.

[Leo Gura]

Maybe you're just spiritually mature enough that sex doesn't interest you much.

The more conscious you become the less meaning sex has.

These days I can go for weeks without thinking about sex. It's just childish stuff in the end.

Edited February 14, 2023 by Leo Gura

[Joel3102]

4 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

Maybe you're just spiritually mature enough that sex doesn't interest you much.

The more conscious you become the less meaning sex has.

These days I can go for weeks without thinking about sex. It's just childish stuff in the end.

Do you think the health issues play a role there or you have just spiritually evolved beyond it to some degree? 

[Leo Gura]

3 hours ago, Joel3102 said:

Do you think the health issues play a role there or you have just spiritually evolved beyond it to some degree? 

Getting older helps. You are not driven by hormones as much as in your youth. But for me, the more sex I have the more I realize how silly it is, and that I have better things to do. Burn through that karma baby.

I still have a decent sex drive.

Edited February 15, 2023 by Leo Gura

[Hello from Russia]

Ehhh 

Im such a horny dog, can't relate at all

D you usually have a good drive towards work/success? Could be the lack of testosterone