SQAAD

Why are We Terrified of Losing Things in Life?

20 posts in this topic

Posted (edited)

Why are we afraid of losing things in our life? I mean we all certainly do unless we are living in a cave somewhere.

We are afraid of losing our health, our youth, our good looks, our money, our intelligence, our partners, our friends, our good habits, our spititual evolution, our skills and etc.

Basically whatever you Love , you are also Terrified of losing that thing... Why is that?

Is is because we are are Terrified of Unhappiness and Misery? Why do we care so much?

All of my fears have their root in a fear of pain , suffering and misery. And why do i fear suffering? Just because it's very uncomfortable.

I don't fear being old, sick or living in a tent. I just fear the misery associated with some of these things. I don't fear death. I fear that after death i may be in a condition where there is too much suffering or pain.

Edited by SQAAD

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6 minutes ago, SQAAD said:

I just fear the misery associated with some of these things.

Stop associating.

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Posted (edited)

You're definitely afraid of death.

Fear comes from the fact that you think you're a real and independent entity.
Losing that entity, or anything associated with it, is why fear emerges, and why suffering occurs.

There is no such thing as suffering, or fear, if you are lucid that you're in a dream.

Edited by Shin

Spirituality is not the renunciation of life

It is the art of living fully

 

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14 minutes ago, SQAAD said:

Why are we afraid of losing things in our life?

Simple. We see value in them.

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Posted (edited)

@Shin

2 hours ago, Shin said:

You're definitely afraid of death.

Fear comes from the fact that you think you're a real and independent entity.
Losing that entity, or anything associated with it, is why fear emerges, and why suffering occurs.

There is no such thing as suffering, or fear, if you are lucid that you're in a dream.

No i don't care about death. I care about suffering and pain. Of course when the moment of death comes i may be quite terrified of it because i don't know what's next. But behind the fear of death is a fear of pain and suffering.

 

I disagree with this whole concept that we are all afraid of Death at the root and that's it. I think we are afraid of pain, suffering and misery at the root.

Someone who commits suicide, isn't afraid of death. He is afraid of misery. There are many people willing to put an end to their lifes just to escape the misery of their existance.

 

Edited by SQAAD

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@ivankiss

2 hours ago, ivankiss said:

Simple. We see value in them.

It's a double-edged-sword..

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3 hours ago, SQAAD said:

Basically whatever you Love , you are also Terrified of losing that thing... Why is that?

Love is letting go and when it does it returns to itself. Where else could it go?

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Posted (edited)

Our taste buds in life is very shallow. We only enjoy the sugary parts of life. An advanced palette would enjoy every bit of cancer, famine, war, getting cremated alive etc.

That's how society is designed.

Wanna change?

Get married to the most ugliest person you can find. Eat the shittiest tasting food everyday, live in the most horrible place you can possibly find, get diabetes on purpose just so you can suffer everyday and don't take your medicine. Cut off all access to the internet world and just live the most boring live you can possibly imagine.

Maybe then maybe, you will realize the truth and savor every bit of existence.

 

Edited by Question

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2 minutes ago, Question said:

Our taste buds in life is very shallow. We only enjoy the sugary parts of life. An advanced palette would enjoy every bit of cancer, famine, war, getting cremated alive etc.

Words of wisdom man, words of wisdom.

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@Question

26 minutes ago, Question said:

 

Get married to the most ugliest person you can find. Eat the shittiest tasting food everyday, live in the most horrible place you can possibly find, get diabetes on purpose just so you can suffer everyday and don't take your medicine. Cut off all access to the internet world and just live the most boring live you can possibly imagine.

Maybe then maybe, you will realize the truth and savor every bit of existence.

 

Interesting. If someone was really able to do that, he would no longer be considered 'human' anymore. At this stage you are more like a God, rather than a lil petty human who is only concerned about preserving his 'body'.

Going against your own self-preservation is maybe the hardest thing to do.

 

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We are territorial and like previous comment said, self-preserving (or at least survival-oriented.)


"We are like the spider. We weave our life and then move along in it. We are like the dreamer who dreams and then lives in the dream. This is true for the entire universe."

-- The Upanishads

Encyclopedia

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In my opinion it's a survival mechanism, everything you have in life, as far as your part of your brain is concerned, has contributed to your survival so far. If something is lost that could affect your survival. Notice this is also the case with change, even if that change could ultimately be positive, for example there could be fear over applying for a new job that is better than your current one. It's almost like there's a mechanism that aims to keep as at a certain point and not improve. 

Of course this has its uses but it also needs to be overridden for us to get anywhere. 

The other thing is you could switch how you see things from scared of loss to gratefulness of abundance. Personally I've found this to be a great way of looking at things. So if you look at it like you could have had any experience as a human, you could be dirt poor, you could have health issues, all your family could've died, literally anything, but you happened to have your experience and I think you can be grateful and feel lucky for anything you do have. It's like when someone dies people are upset that they don't get more time with that person, but you can look at it like you didn't have to get anytime with that person. 

But in general we mostly live in scarcity and need to shift to abundance. 

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12 hours ago, SQAAD said:

Why are we afraid of losing things in our life? I mean we all certainly do unless we are living in a cave somewhere.

We are afraid of losing our health, our youth, our good looks, our money, our intelligence, our partners, our friends, our good habits, our spititual evolution, our skills and etc.

Basically whatever you Love , you are also Terrified of losing that thing... Why is that?

Is is because we are are Terrified of Unhappiness and Misery? Why do we care so much?

All of my fears have their root in a fear of pain , suffering and misery. And why do i fear suffering? Just because it's very uncomfortable.

I don't fear being old, sick or living in a tent. I just fear the misery associated with some of these things. I don't fear death. I fear that after death i may be in a condition where there is too much suffering or pain.

I recently lost a 20 year old friend of mine of cancer. 

I think we should be afraid, we shouldn't deny it. 

we need each other so its good to feel fear when we do. 

what matters most is the coping of fear we should try to handle it well

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Posted (edited)

@SQAAD your ego is a perfect survival machine programmed to escape from the bad (for your survival), and pursue the good. He is your friend, but you have to keep him under control, know exactly what he does and how. 

more accurate would be to say that he must keep himself under control

Edited by Breakingthewall

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The reason people commit suicide is that their suffering are son intense that they prefer to not feel anything anymore.

They still fear death, it's just a better outcome.


Spirituality is not the renunciation of life

It is the art of living fully

 

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@Shin

11 hours ago, Shin said:

The reason people commit suicide is that their suffering are son intense that they prefer to not feel anything anymore.

They still fear death, it's just a better outcome.

They definetely fear Suffering more than death.

Not everyone fears Death the same way. Sometimes i get heart palpitations and i am like 'mmm ok' and i brush it off whereas other people would get freaked out. 

The only reason why you would fear death is because you are afraid of what's afterwards. You don't know if it will be for better for worse. 

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@Inva

14 hours ago, Inva said:

I recently lost a 20 year old friend of mine of cancer. 

I think we should be afraid, we shouldn't deny it. 

we need each other so its good to feel fear when we do. 

what matters most is the coping of fear we should try to handle it well

Yeah i agree. I view fear as something helpful for survival . It's a wise mechanism.

But on the other hand i want to transcend the need to survive as much as possible. I want when the moment of death comes, to welcome it as much as possible.

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Posted (edited)

On 04/05/2021 at 10:23 PM, SQAAD said:

Why are we afraid of losing things in our life?

Because this masks a deeper fear, that we don't really own these things in the first place. Our life is a moving picture of conditions, both good and bad (for survival), we want to hold onto the good and reject the bad. But everything gained, is lost, what then is the owner when all is lost? On introspection, is there an owner to begin with? 

Edited by snowyowl

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Posted (edited)

@snowyowl

17 minutes ago, snowyowl said:

Our life is a moving picture of conditions, both good and bad (for survival), we want to hold onto the good and reject the bad. 

This is so true. And we can't really help ourselves too much. I mean we like certain things and dislike some other things.

The only reason we like something is because we like it.

The only reason why we dislike something it is usually because we dislike it.

No matter how much Contemplation you do, it's pretty hard to like certain things (like Torture). Lol . But still i believe that if you reach insane levels of Consciousness then your likings may dramatically change.

If we liked everything then life would be a paradise for the ego.

Edited by SQAAD

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Because have the genes of monkeys trying to survive in the woods. If we didn't have monkey genes, we'd all be dead now.

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