GroovyGuru

How do I overcome feeling physically unattractive?

35 posts in this topic

@Preety_India

My only experience is all the stories my female friends tell me about how this guy is flirting with them and this guy here is approaching them and they just feel annoyed from having like 5 guys a month wanting to fuck them (mostly from social media, some in real life)

Must suck being them yeah 

:'(

I apologise for the sexist stuff i said though, the rest im pretty sure its bs

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@Preety_India Ignore the vulgar man talk, It wasn't intended maliciously. Just some guys outside our hot girls club ;) 


"Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it" -Rumi

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2 minutes ago, Moon said:

@Preety_India Ignore the vulgar man talk, It wasn't intended maliciously. Just some guys outside our hot girls club ;) 

I hope you ladies remember this thread next time you are having self esteem issues and lead a guy on who you aren't interested in to boost your confidence. I ain't mad at it, but it is ridiculous that you are making it seem like men are the only assholes. 

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9 minutes ago, Axiomatic said:

I hope you ladies remember this thread next time you are having self esteem issues and lead a guy on who you aren't interested in to boost your confidence. I ain't mad at it, but it is ridiculous that you are making it seem like men are the only assholes. 

I'm sorry if someone hurt you man, let's move on :D No one's an assehole here.


"Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it" -Rumi

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8 minutes ago, Moon said:

I'm sorry if someone hurt you man, let's move on :D No one's an assehole here.

That's not what ya girl is saying though. I'm doing fine, I'm just setting the record straight, since the ladies often get offended and try to demonize men. Derailing threads with dudes who are in need of support and making it about you. 

Edited by Axiomatic

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Everyone looks good. Nobody is really unattractive. 

Don't go by what someone told you. 

And if someone said that you are ugly, it reflects more on their ugly mindset, and it's not about you.. 

All this lookism discrimination is giving everyone a self esteem grenade assault. It needs to be fought tooth and nail. Raise your self esteem so that you never allow such mindsets in your life.. 

Nobody is born beautiful or ugly. Just a bunch of nonsense to make people feel bad, nothing else. 

@GroovyGuru. You are good looking as you are. Don't internalize what someone says to you. It's they who are lacking heart and intellect.

I had my ex call me ugly repeatedly through the relationship. It used to hurt so bad. And then there were other people who always called me beautiful 

If someone wants to put you down it's their problem. Not yours. You're not lacking. They are lacking in love. 

I have moved on from the terrible person who always attacked my self esteem brutally.. 

And finally found a person who truly appreciates me. 

Find a woman/man who appreciates you for who you are. And those who make you feel bad for being you, they don't deserve to live in your life rent free. 

Give them the boot the way I gave the boot to my ex for good. 

Don't want such people in life. 

 


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

Cleared out ignore list today. 

..

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2 hours ago, Karmadhi said:

And how do you plan to do that?

Go out and talk to girls.

You're making this too complicated with your horrible inner game.

The proper inner game is this: Stop thinking and GO OUT AND TALK TO GIRLS!

I used to be very insecure. Until I started going out and hot girls slowly started to get attracted to me. That changed my inner game because you can't believe "I'm not good looking enough" once a hot girl is eager to suck your dick.

If you talk to 100s of girls you will notice that a few of them really love you. It's a numbers game.

If you believe you can't, then you can't. If you believe you can, then you can. Be ware of how your mind constructs reality.


You are God. You are Truth. You are Love. You are Infinity.

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16 hours ago, Karmadhi said:

I am just stating reality

@Karmadhi No you are not, you are expressing your ignorance and limiting beliefs, and offending many people in the process. Literally nothing what you claimed is true. Ask yourself whether you are really in the position to give advice, or maybe you should watch some more videos, learn from people here and work on your beliefs? Because they're pretty messed up.


Learn to resolve trauma. Together.

Testimonials thread: www.actualized.org/forum/topic/82672-experience-collection-childhood-aware-life-purpose-coaching/

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It's a mind issue definately

I got a stunning body but still i felt the most miserable person in the world due to personal reasons. I just focused on survival so i did not give a five about flirting or showing attractive.

Curiously i managed to still stick to my gym and diet so i maintain my health and physique and even feeling lonely and desperate shows a over average look. Now i realized i got random approaches by males but i was SO IMMERSED in my pain that I did not noticed them at all plus I WAS NOT EVEN CAPABLE OF LOOKING PEOPLE INTO THEIR EYES. It's scary thing isn't it @Leo Gura:(

 

Now..in these pandemic era i realized all that i've missed and all that have kept me forward

Still...I acknowledge it's a mind thing and i feel unattractive sometimes when i realize i got no social circle or a mega social abilities that would make it all easier

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@Username I've actually thought about this scenario before but fear I'd actually end up judging myself more lol. I don't really judge myself because I've grown and matured and have come to terms with who I am for the most part (obviously I still have some limiting beliefs and what not), but when I used to smoke weed pretty regularly late in high school, I would always judge myself very badly, sometimes to the point of tears, when I'd be high looking at myself in the mirror. However, I was also pretty depressed during that time period so I never think like that anymore.

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Stop trying to "be confident", and focus on being natural


one day this will all be memories

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3 minutes ago, GroovyGuru said:

@Username I've actually thought about this scenario before but fear I'd actually end up judging myself more lol. I don't really judge myself because I've grown and matured and have come to terms with who I am for the most part (obviously I still have some limiting beliefs and what not), but when I used to smoke weed pretty regularly late in high school, I would always judge myself very badly, sometimes to the point of tears, when I'd be high looking at myself in the mirror. However, I was also pretty depressed during that time period so I never think like that anymore.

Be gentle with yourself. Nothing worse than judging yourself so badly. 


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

Cleared out ignore list today. 

..

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On 12/7/2020 at 9:06 AM, Karmadhi said:

@Leo Gura And how do you plan to do that? If the guy is ugly then his inner game is already bad from years of being treated like shit by girls. Hot girls will not reject good looking guys with confidence for an ugly guy that is insecure about his looks. He should start with ugly girls then build himself up to hot girls. Pussy is pussy. Ugly girls pussies feel just as good as hot girls pussies, the rest is just bs in your head and ego validation

@Recursoinominado If looks dont matter then a guy with good game would pick up every single girl he approached. Usually even guys with good game will attract a small fraction of what they approach. I am not saying looks are the end all be all but saying they do not matter is ridiciolous and denying reality. "If you are good looking you can get away with A LOT more and have girls attracted to you by just existing and not being a wimp but as an ugly guy with great game you can do just as well, it is just more work. Basically like studying for an exam versus being naturally smart and not having to study. It is not fair but life is not fair, dont complain and grow". This seems as better advice.

Don't talk like an expert-- or parrot the advice of others, if you haven't put skin in the game. 

Comparing advice is dumb, unless you've taken sufficient action. 

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Start doing sports? At least your brain gets some hormones and be more tolerant towards your own self

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