GroovyGuru

@Scholar You not seeing a problem in the situation is still valuable feedback for me. I'm literally just trying to get people's opinion.

@Raze Well, up to this point in my life I've spent countless hours reading/watching videos on how to attract women and talk to them in a masculine way. Typically when I match with a girl online, my strategy is to get a conversation going by mentioning something on her profile or asking a simple question, and then exchange back and forth with her in a humorous/flirty way. After only a few messages and I can tell she is responding well and laughing or whatever, I ask her when she is free this week for a phone call. And then later I call her, talk for a few minutes and set up a date. In a year of online dating, I've only been able to see this process to its conclusion less than 10 times. Usually the girls will stop responding at some point, or just ignore my initial message in the first place. Some dates have gone good with girls really liking me, others were meh. So, I don't want to sound like I'm flawless or totally without error (because I have made mistakes before, obviously), but truly, I don't think I'm doing anything wrong. I've just come to the conclusion that this is the nature of online dating. And currently, my life is not set up in a way where I am constantly meeting new people/women. I was really hoping something would come out of online dating and I tried my best to maximize my profile and the way I talk to my matches but at this point, it really just seems like a waste of time.

So I'm 25 and up to this point I have not had much dating experience. I'm able to get a decent amount of matches with girls online but it usually never leads anywhere. Either we don't meet up, or the girls just stop responding, even though in the vast majority of cases I've done nothing wrong. I should also add that I'm rather picky. Because of my nonexistent dating life, and especially because my younger brother has now had a girlfriend for years, my parents are becoming concerned and are eager for me to start dating. I'm Middle Eastern, and in my culture it's pretty common for marriages and relationships to occur from word-of-mouth. Basically, somebody in the family knows somebody else that's single, and a connection is made. So they are encouraging me to start talking to a girl that lives in France. I initiated the other day and we really hit it off. She is 20, beautiful, really easy to talk to, smart (she speaks 4 languages), and we seem to have some things in common. Another important factor is that I'm almost certain she has never been with another man before, given her cultural and religious background. A part of me feels this whole situation is unrealistic because it's hard enough to get a girl in my own city. But I also don't want to pass an opportunity with a girl that at least on the surface seems like she can be wife material. She was also told that I was going to reach out to her, so the way she texts I can tell she is very interested and excited. I don't really know how to approach the situation. I mean she lives in another part of the world. Usually how this thing would go is that we would continue to talk for several months until I eventually go decide to meet her in France. And if we hit it off, I would probably just get engaged to her. This is wild to me because even though I'm Arab, I'm much, much more connected to American culture. So moving at that pace would feel weird. Another concern for me is that I am not religious at all, so I need to find out how important that is to her in a partner. How does this sound to you guys? Does it sound crazy or should I just keep an open mind and see where it goes like my parents are saying? The thing is, at this point I SERIOUSLY don't know where I'm going to meet a girl I deem girlfriend material, and who also likes me back. It's just not happening for me.

I have made strides in my ability to attract and connect with women I find attractive. I have spent time learning and appyling what I've learned, which has given me some results and has increased the confidence I have in myself. I can text a woman in a flirty and fun way. I can call her on the phone to set a date. I can display masculine and confident traits when we meet in person. I can make her laugh. I can connect with her and show her my personality. I can charm her. I can read her signals, and kiss her when it is appropriate. However, new fears have been unlocked. I have fears about moving beyond the initial meeting and taking it to the next level, where things are bound to become sexual. Below I will list the main fears I have By far and away, my main fear is not being able to get it up when the moment arrives. This is especially true because I failed on 2 occasions with a girl I was seeing several months ago. She really liked me, but I never penetrated her. I eventually cut it off with her because I did not share her level of interest I fear being clueless in the moment, and my cluelessness being evident I fear that I will be too anxious and in my head when the moment arrives, ultimately leading to a bad experience for the girl Basically, I am just not experienced sexually even though the girls would never be able to guess that. I fear being intimate because I fear that I will be bad at it, or just fail altogether (not being able to become erect). I currently have several opportunities to have sex with some beautiful women over the next few weeks. I really need to get in the right place psychologically. Any advice is massively appreciated.

I think it's a tough spot to be in on dating apps at my age of 24. Women are obviously flooded with options. What happens to me is that I'll get a few matches a week, several of which I am highly interested in and would easily go on a date with. And of course, they either totally ignore my initial message, or we chat for a bit (and sometimes it's a great chat, those sting the most) and they eventually suddenly stop responding or unmatch me. I'm fully aware this is not a unique experience and likely happens to 80-90% of guys on the apps. Aside from hiring a professional photogropher, I'm not too sure how to increase my chances. My photos are good, and in a few you can see me traveling (I have a pic in Italy, and one with the Eiffel Tower behind me). I clearly show off my interests, and I am quite good at texting and being funny and spontaneous. I'm just wondering if it's a matter of patience, or if they are seriously not worth the time? I think at the very least I'm gonna take a break because all of this ghosting has me feeling quite defeated and lonely. In general, it seems dating for young men nowadays is quite tough with how selective women can afford to be (not blaming them, they have every right to be). But it leaves me wondering what it is they want exactly? I make more money than most people my age (and will make a lot more soon), I have a nice apartment, am fit, educated, interesting hobbies etc. I may have literally no choice but to change strategies and do the night game stuff, even though I am starting to fucking loathe going out as I now see it as a total waste of time and money, and I'm starting to really get sick of the shallow and meaningless socialization.

For the first time in my life I've started exploring dating and interacting with a lot of women. For years I've learned about game and how to go about attracting women but I never really put it into practice until a few weeks ago. Because of that I've been pretty damn successful right off the bat, which has only made me more confident and inspired to improve and explore this area of life. I find that humour and playfully teasing women is one of the most impactful ways to be attractive, if not the most. Last weekend I went out and was just in a good mood and was joking around and teasing girls and their dance moves and almost every single girl I did that to responded so damn well to it. I can be pretty decent at it, but I want to become way better. I want my wit and humour to be fucking automatic and clever. It's usually like that over text, I tend to be a really great texter because I have some time to think of something cheeky and ballsy. But in person, it's sometimes hard to think of stuff on the spot. Anyone have any tips or resources about how to improve your wit and humour? I don't want to improve this characteristic just for picking up women, it's useful in many ways and in general, we all love people who are lighthearted and funny.

Quit being cringe, bro. This show has been incredible. I'm not much of a tv show guy and try to stray away from them because they make me an unproductive robot (especially if they are good pieces of art). I love everything about this show... The setting and time period, the acting, the mystery, the slow pace, the creativity etc. I think Leo is correct in saying that there is a lot to potentially take away if you were to contemplate all the meaning, symbolism, mythology etc. I can easily intuit that there is plenty there but I'm too smooth-brained to understand what the show is trying to tell me sometimes. In any case I can't remember that last time I watched a show where I was telling myself "just one more episode" more than this. I can't wait to finish it so I can be somewhat productive again. @Leo Gura Thanks for the rec, been enjoying your blog content lately.

I've begun to notice that I feel a lot of guilt in my life because I often fail to live up to the high values and standards I set for myself. When I am living up to my values and engaging in the positive habits I've determined for myself, I obviously feel much better and more grounded, confident etc. The problem is that I have an issue with being consistent, and sometimes it doesn't take much for me to be totally derailed. This bothers me because if I can't even maintain consistency with what I consider the basics of life, how will I ever level up? To give some prespective, I would like to share a few of the daily habits that I value but sometimes fail to live up to: Waking up at 7am or earlier each day Eating enough food every day (I lift weights so if I don't eat right, what's the point?) Being very productive at work 20 min of sunlight each day Physical activity each day Study foreign language and read 20-50 pages Limit phone and social media use 8 hours of sleep Explore/do new things on my free days Limit unhealthy habits and potential addictions such as video games, porn, nicotine, booze etc Although I can do really well with all of these things for a time, I always inevitably end up betraying myself in at least some of the things listed, and am consumed by guilt as a result. For example, I work from home and have a very flexible job, so I often wake up randomly, past 8am and often don't work very hard because some days I just don't have a lot of work (I'm a web developer). I also feel extremely guilty and disgusted with myself when I fall back into the consumption of porn and video games. I also feel very guilty when I stop working out and don't eat healthy or consistently for a period of time (this never lasts longer than like 2 weeks, but still). When I am in a period that I would consider unproductive or in betrayal of my values, I am still doing better than the majority of my friends and peers (I'm hard on myself). And EVEN when I AM in alignment and doing the habits consistently, I still can't help but feel a bit of guilt because I know I can do/be even better, and I'll often reflect about the other areas in my life in which I still feel are empty and lacking, such as my totally nonexistent dating life, or relative lack of adventure in my life. Does anyone have any tips on either how to deal with this guilt, and/or how to finally stop losing my momentum and just be consistent with the basics. Does Leo or anyone have a video discussing these themes? I would be curious to hear your thoughts...

I don't know anything about this whatsoever, but it sounds like it could be fun. Why not. Personality Type: INFJ Appearance: 23 year old male. Lebanese. Tan, black hair. 5'10 and 180 pounds. In shape with some muscle What I'd like a reading on: umm, I have no idea. How about love, since this is not something I experience outside of friends and family. Edit: After going back and reading other responses, it seems I have to ask a more specific question. So... why is it that I'm not able to experience love in my life? Why do I engage in self-sabotaging behavior? Will this ever change for me?

@Leo Gura Are you sure about this Leo? I see where you are coming from, but I personally feel non-needy for a different reason. It's important to note that I'm partly speculating because until I start getting more experience with women, I actually can't perfectly predict how needy or non-needy I will be. However, at this point, I have been alone for so long that it is completely normal and all I really know. I literally don't know anything else (by alone I strictly mean romantically, I have tons of friends). I have learned to keep myself busy and find pleasure in activites that don't involve dating. So, I sort of feel that if a girl stops texting me, or blows me off, or doesn't want to be with me, then just oh well. Back to normal. Who gives a fuck. If anyting, I feel I may have the opposite problem of being needy. Often I'm way too aloof and cold, and don't always demonstrate interest. Am i being naive here? Do you think when I start getting more involved in dating I'll perhaps get a sense of what I've been missing all my life and become attached? I know you can't really answer without knowing me, but I'm just curious if you have something to say given your personal experience.

Hey guys. I need help creating a solid plan on how to stop being lonely and isolated. This is becoming a MAJOR problem in my life and if I don't solve it now I'm gonna be fucked. Bascially, exactly a year ago (Feb 2021), I decided that nothing was more important than figuring out my career situation. I had graduated with a degree that I didn't like, was recently laid off due to COVID reasons, and needed to figure out what to do with my life ASAP. Long story short, I spent an entire year teaching myself how to prorgram. I built some solid skills and an impressive portoflio, and now I've been a professional web developer for almost a month. Good. Now that aspect of my life is covered. During the learning process however, I had to make a lot of sacrifices. I barely went out and associated with people. I declined invites to hang out, and stopped reaching out to people. Now this is coming back to bite me in the butt. At this point, I have almost 0 social life. This is a complete disaster for someone in my age group. I really don't have many friends (at least friends who still live in my city), and the friends I do have I hang out with a few times a month but we never do anything too crazy or adventerous. Any time friends or acquaintances go out and do fun stuff, I'm never invited. It's either because these events were organized by friends of friends who I'm not close with, or that I'm just perceived as a boring person maybe. Also, I have 0 women in my life. This is also a becoming an insane problem for me. This post is not just limited to friendship, it's really about me lacking recent experience in the entire social matrix domain. I've been living the same day over and over for far too long. I work, exercise, read, browse the internet, and maybe meditate. That's it. I need advice on how to create a solid strategy to turn my life around. I am naturally introverted but this is now going into a very weird direction. I'm starting to get scared and worried and this is totally eating away at my mental health now. I'm a normal guy. I can be very sociable and funny and charming. I don't sit in my room and play computer games all day. I can be a valuable addition to people's lives. I know Leo made an entire series about attracting women and going out and stuff, I probably need to start doing that but I can't really remember if he mentioned going out alone vs with friends. Going out alone would be insanely difficult. Anyways, what can I do guys? How can I make new friends or strengthen the existing friendships and acquaintanceships I already have? This is the missing link in my life. I have a good career, I'm healthy and in shape. My finances are in order. Fuck, I just need some companionship and some engagement with the opposite sex

But most of the proposals in BBB are supremely popular among West Virgians arn't they? I believe there are polls that show that most of his WV constituents would actually greatly favor and benefit from BBB. Regardless he's among the most corrupt legislators in congress and the dems and progressives have not done nearly a good enough job in blatantly calling him out on his corruption and how his obstructionist ways are preventing people of West Virginia from living better lives

@Leo Gura Totally agree with that. Cenk especially can act extemely silly and sarcastic but I tend to find him hilarious so it doesn't really bother me and also I think TYT does the best job of covering topics and stories that REALLY matter. If you look at other popular YouTube lefties, many of them have become extermely hard to watch in my opinion. David Pakman for example is clearly very articulate and intelligent, but almost every single one of his videos has 'Trump' in the title and he is absolutely obssessed with 'owning the cons'. Very ironic considering he is always judging the content that the right-wing puts out and how it has no substance beyond them trying to 'own the libs'. For me, people like Vaush and Hasan are extremely cringe. I used to watch Vaush a bit more, but honestly I get the vibe that he is constantly looking for something to be offended and triggered by. And all he talks about is gay/trans/lgbtq shit which is very unintersting to me. Also loves owning the cons. That type of content gets so boring. And then you have The Majority Report which is okay I guess. Sam is very intelligent and really understands politics so I like hearing what he has to say but yet again they really love just making fun of the other side. Stage green, which I would say is the place that most of these people operate from, can be so damn tribalistic and toxic. This is something I have been noticing. I totally understand that these are well-intentioned people and that the values they hold are 'higher' than their political opponents and others operating from lower stages, but it seems to me that they can be just as ideological, closed-minded, and authoritarian as those they love to point their finger at. To say I have been feeling politcally lost and confused lately is an understatement.

I don't know what the heck is wrong with me. I do not at all consider myself unconfident and un-masculine in most areas of my life. I stay in good shape. I am aggressively pursuing an amazing career. My friends and family view me as a very wise and mature 23 year old. I have plenty of goals and aspirations. Yet, when it comes to dating and sexuality, I have absolutely 0 experience and my psychology in this area is a total disaster. As the title says, I just totally lack belief in myself. The idea of ever being able to be romantic and intimate with a woman who I find attractive literally seems almost impossible to imagine. I'm being serious here. I REALLY don't want to sound like a hopeless and desperate incel because typically when I recognize that I'm operating from a victim mindset I can quickly tell myself self to shut the f*%$ up, man up, and deal with what I have to deal with. But I am struggling so bad in this domain of life. My biggest obstacle is that I am nearing my mid 20s and feel that my window of sexual learning and experimentation has passed. I feel that any woman I would try to connect with at this point is not looking to hold my hand and guide me through this. A 23 or 24 year old woman wants a man who knows what he is doing. I cannot offer that. And I am so paralyzed with fear in this area of my life that I can't even get myself to try. Why did I not experience these things in my teens like most of my peers? I truly do not know, it is a mystery to me as to how I even ended up in this situation. I feel so ashamed and embarrassed. But at the same time I know I am not a weak man. I may struggle in certain areas of my life but I will never stop aiming for something in this life and trying to become my best version. I believe I am a product of a negative self-fulfilling prophecy. Years and years of wondering, self-doubt, shame, and very little action. I feel quite defeated. Like my mind has beat me, at least when it comes to dating. I don't know how to go about changing my mindset, and I'm running out of time. How can I ever find a partner if I can't even envision it? It's now come to the point where certain family members, especially my mother, are starting to worry and become concerned. I'm sure my friends think it's quite weird too. This added pressure makes me feel worse about myself. I feel I am strong and independent enough to be fine and content on my own, but I'm not going to fool myself into thinking that I'm not missing out on one of the most beautiful and worthwhile aspects of life, like many weird ass incel and red pill guys do.

The last few months I have been working very hard studying web development and computer programming related topics. I am currently working part-time while investing anywhere between 3-6 hours everyday studying and practicing. I have a clear vision for what I want in life and where I want to be, at least within the next 5-10 years, and I have been working incredibly hard and sacrificing a lot to get to this position within the next few months to a year. However, my dilemma is that I have SO many interests in my life and so many things I want to study and learn about and get involved in. These last few months I have given up a lot of things that I would normally engage in. Things like: daily exercise, taking nutrition seriously, reading books, meditating, watching interesting documentaries, staying up to date with politics, engaging on this forum etc... Literally all I've done the last 4 months is work and study. And I have progressed an enormous amount because of it. I seriously feel like I'm making considerable strides towards my goal. But I really miss my other hobbies and feel that I'm stagnating in other areas where I want to grow. For those who are pursuing a LP or career or have successfully done so already, did you have to make similar sacrifices? How did you deal with this? Where you able to pick up hobbies and interests when your goal was eventually met? In reality, of course I already know sacrifices are going to have to be made if I want to achieve my goal in the timeframe I have set for myself. I guess I'm just curious about how others dealt with these sacrifices.