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About Axiomatic

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  1. So a quick bit of history about myself: I am a 30 yr old straight man. I have dated on and off through my adult life. I took a hiatus from dating for a few years due to health issues and also focusing on school. I also realized that the stress and anxiety from things such as dating contributed to my health issues. I felt it was best to focus on myself and get to a better place before I open this avenue again. Well it is present day, and I feel as ready as I ever have to date again. I didn't know where to start, but I am in between semesters this summer and decided to get a summer job at a restaurant. I didn't know what to expect, but I tried to be friendly, open, and do a good job. Well I realized that I'm quite popular with a lot of the women there. There were 2 or 3 in particular that I felt were interested in me. One thing I learned from my dating mistakes pre hiatus was to really be aware of the woman who I was going for. Their age, maturity level, life choices all need to be a factor in that. Because not only would I like something serious, but I just don't want to deal with someone who is going to mistreat me or cause me unnecessary problems. Blindly going for women who I was simply attracted to on a physical level was a failing formula for me. So I decided to ask out a women at work who I really liked. She is 32, going to nursing school, and is someone who I felt comfortable around from the start. She always seemed interested in me. She ask me about myself, my interest. I catch her glancing at me when were in the same area. I had a strong feeling that she liked me and that asking her out was a good idea. So after a few weeks of working there, I finally asked her. I simply said "Hey I know you're busy with all your stuff, but if you ever wanted to do something outside of work I would definitely be up for that". She agreed, asked me if I liked to hike, then offered me her phone number. I felt ecstatic. After that part of my life being cut off for so long, it felt like a real rush to have a girl who I crush on say yes. I waited a few days, and then I texted her. I just let her know my schedule and asked if she was free any of those days. ...She didn't text me back for a day and a half. I tried not to get anxious about it, but it bothered me enough to turn my notifications off. She finally texted back and said "Hey! hmmm how about next week?" I said thats fine and then she asked about my 4th of july, etc. I'd see her at work and felt like the vibes were stronger. It felt like we both wanted to get closer to each other and want to be alone with each other if possible. She continued to ask about what I like and such. She mentioned how she wanted sushi at work. So I texted her a few days later in the evening "Heyy I've been wanting sushi ever since you mentioned it. I'm probably gonna get some tomorrow, if you're free you should join me!" I didn't get a reply...I felt terrible. I started to feel anxious like I did in the past. Trying to figure out if I did, said, or went about it wrong. Did I come off too strong? I saw her at work the next day. She came up to me and said "I'm so sorry I didn't text you back! I was visiting my mom". I played it cool. Just joked that I went with my roommate. She started asking me more questions like where do I like to go to eat sushi? She tried to converse with me whenever we could and I once again felt okay. I thought "Of course she likes me! She apologized and is asking about me so shes clearly interested!" I went to bed feeling happy about it, but then it struck me. She didn't have the courtesy to text me back at all, she didn't attempt to set up another time, let alone tell me what her when she's available. At work she seems interested, but her actions speak differently. I have decided to let off the gas for a bit and just let things be. I find myself going through similar patterns that I once did before I went on hiatus. The constantly being in my head trying to figure shit out. Even though I knew I just needed to let it go, it still bugged me. It left me feeling a bit frustrated. She seems like a really sweet person, and I don't think she intentionally tries to manipulate me, but a younger/more immature me would see it as a perfect plan to lead me on. It kind of makes me feel bad. Like she doesn't take me seriously or something. And before I get any replies, I want to also add that I am aware that sometimes girls are just being friendly and not always romantically interested. Trust me, I do my best to be aware of that. That didn't feel like this...but maybe it was. At the end of the day I feel a lack of communication of what she wants. I clearly told her I want to go out with her. If she wasn't interested I would be fine if she just said she was looking for friends. If thats the case, why didn't she just say that? Because shes afraid I wouldn't want to be her friend? If so, thats not much of an excuse to lead me on. This is all speculation btw. This is hard...but I don't want to run away anymore.
  2. For one, white women try to divorce themselves from their white privilege in attempt to be apart of the club. But they are clearly way more self entitled and shitty than people who face real oppression. And the shittiest part is that their voices are heard more often than other oppressed groups. On top of that, they use this idea of oppression (which is really just insecurity) as a reason to be shitty to other people. A prime example is my roommate situation. I roomed with two white women. A few months ago, I got really sick and had to get a serious surgery for my gallbladder. On top of that I was carrying my corpse through finals. And during that week I let the dishes go (it was honestly hard to tell which were mine because my other roommates didn't do their dishes either). But instead of understanding my situation and even trying to discuss and communicate the issue, they waited until I went out of town for the surgery and tried to tear me apart through text. Calling me a self entitled man expecting them to clean everything. They tried to make me feel like a straight up piece of shit. Fast forward a few months. One of these roommates had their alcoholic mom stay over for a fucking week, and they TRASHED the kitchen. They just got drunk for days on end and left it a wreck. When I asked her to clean it so I could cook, she just cussed me out and said I'm just as messy (a straight up lie). Her mom heard and decided to clean up because she knew it was out of hand. And my roommate got angry that "she was submitting to a man telling her to clean" and punched a mirror and threw it out the window. She also left that broken mirror in our driveway for days before cleaning it up. So in the minds of an 'empowered white woman', if I don't clean up my mess, I am sexist and disrespectful. But if I ask them to clean up their mess, I am also sexist and disrespectful. White feminism is the biggest bullshit in our current culture. And the saddest part is that it will probably be one of the only 'issues' that will ever be addressed in our modern times. I pray that one day society will see through their bullshit.
  3. youd be pathetic and weak if i saw you in person. I can tell the type of dude you are
  4. yeah, but he said some disrespectful shit with that word nig***. So i think hes a prick and id clock his ass if he tried to talk that way around me in person im not even gonna report it. but he aint shit typin all that on here
  5. Damn bro...that whole paragraph was incredibly disrespectful. Regardless of the subject
  6. I think a lot of people in this community make the mistake of an all or nothing attitude. They see how intense these Yogis and Leo can be, and they feel like either you must devote your entire being to whatever they think they are looking for and there is no other way. I started this journey as well, but got a bit burnt out like you seem to be saying. I realized that my spiritual journey can compliment my life, rather than be my life itself. I still meditate and apply awareness, try to use that in my everyday life etc, but I dont feel this need to break through anymore. When it is time for me to make a breakthrough, I'll be open to it as much as possible. But im not gonna spend my life being a monk
  7. this thread is kinda lame lol. stop putting leo on a pedestal. hes just a human
  8. we just gonna be like cowboy bebop i guess
  9. If real meat is not available in supermarkets in the future, then I guess ill be doing more hunting and fishing
  10. He was probably talking about the Ham Burgler and got confused where he was and what he was addressing.
  11. Understanding the destruction women can cause (which is more subtle and manipulative compared to the male's physical destruction) is one of the few things Islam got right. Idk if they should cover them all up, but it's easy to see and understand if you truly know female nature.
  12. I always knew the day would come where far left/feminist agenda would but heads with Islam. They preach tolerance and acceptance of other cultures, but now it affects their agenda. And they are mindlessly getting upset and applying their "enlightened values" to a society that doesn't give a shit about what they think. It's quite hilarious and was easily predictable
  13. trapped in iraq would be a great name for a mixtape. try to start a rap career op
  14. OP is the same woman who said women only go to the clubs for dancing lol She aint got a got dang clue in her head