Being authentic as a neurodivergent person can be unattractive to others and oneself

[Ima Freeman]

Just had the insight that neurodivergent behaviour is unattractive to other people and even oneself.

The neurotic behaviour, the nervous laughter, the restlessness, etc....

 

Although, off course, it can be attractive too. People like weirdness, stimulation etc...

 

Being authentic or controlled, or both depending on context. What is wise here?

[Jirh]

I love it.

[Yimpa]

I was ugly when I was masking as a normie. 

I live in a stage green environment and blend in so that obviously helps.

[Basman]

Humans tend to feel that if your negative in any kind of way it is because of them. Its kind of like when you stare a monkey in the eyes. It ticks them off. Being uncomfortable is a major hurdle for autistic rizz. Another is a lack of interest in the person you are talking to. 

Passion and sincerity is charming regardless of who its from, which autistis should naturally be good at. Social calibration is a skill issue. Go read The Charisma Myth. It was written by a sperg.

[Lyubov]

You put too much energy into caring what other people think about you. 

[Yimpa]

2 hours ago, Lyubov said:

You put too much energy into caring what other people think about you. 

It's not merely about caring, it's about survival. And not merely about my survival, but also about their survival.

I would easily be murdered, bullied, harassed, and beaten in many parts of the world today.

There are even forum users and lurkers on here who have fantasies of doing that to me as I speak.

People who are sheep and part of a large herd so that they blend in don't have to care as much.

Edited 2 hours ago by Yimpa

[Joseph Maynor]

I find this to be kind of sad.  To not be authentic to me causes a lot of suffering.  Once I stopped trying to be someone I'm not, a lot of stress fell away for me.

[Yimpa]

3 minutes ago, Joseph Maynor said:

I find this to be kind of sad.  To not be authentic to me causes a lot of suffering.  Once I stopped trying to be someone I'm not, a lot of stress fell away for me.

[Joshe]

Let your freak flag fly. There will be many who don’t like it.p, but it filters for the people who do.

[Joseph Maynor]

One thing that does require a degree of masking is when you are at work.  There is a professionalism required usually at work, which is a kind of mask that most people even normies wear at work.

[Ulax]

1 hour ago, Yimpa said:

It's not merely about caring, it's about survival. And not merely about my survival, but also about their survival.

I would easily be murdered, bullied, harassed, and beaten in many parts of the world today.

There are even forum users and lurkers on here who have fantasies of doing that to me as I speak.

People who are sheep and part of a large herd so that they blend in don't have to care as much.

[Yimpa]

6 minutes ago, Ulax said:

 

[Ima Freeman]

2 hours ago, Yimpa said:

It's not merely about caring, it's about survival. And not merely about my survival, but also about their survival.

I would easily be murdered, bullied, harassed, and beaten in many parts of the world today.

There are even forum users and lurkers on here who have fantasies of doing that to me as I speak.

People who are sheep and part of a large herd so that they blend in don't have to care as much.

I think it makes a big difference if you are a man or woman in that context.

There are different expectations upon you, people will treat you differently for many reasons.

[Yimpa]

Unicorn  

[Ulax]

1 hour ago, Yimpa said: