Is awakening even real?

[Deadpixel]

For about four years, I've been on this journey, diving into Leo's work and trying to have what he calls "direct experiences." I've meditated, contemplated the ideas, and done the practices, but a lot of the time, I feel I'm still where I started at. I've had what I think were some fleeting glimpses—moments where the ordinary world felt thin or transparent—but they always feel so fragile. I can’t seem to hold onto them, and the a-ha feeling quickly fades. Soon enough, I'm back in my default worldview, and the doubts come flooding in.

The entire concept of solipsism initially terrified me. The thought of being completely alone, with everything and everyone being a projection of my own mind, felt like the ultimate nightmare. But lately, my perspective has completely flipped. Now, I'm finding a strange sense of comfort in the idea. The thought of a world with other people and a truly solid, external reality feels much more threatening than a world that's just me. There's so much to fear in a world of others: judgment, loss, and the unpredictability of human connection. The idea of being the absolute for eternity, able to create and insert myself into a dream world indistinguishable from "reality" whenever I get bored and need an adventure, feels like a serene and welcoming escape.

This is where I'm at now: I desperately want to fully know and experience that solipsism is true so I can stop this back-and-forth doubting. But the biggest fear I face is the thought that this is all just a story I'm telling myself to cope. I keep worrying that Leo's ideas are simply bullshit and that the terrifying, messy, "real" world is the only thing that actually exists. 

[emil1234]

what do you mean this messy real world. its pristine and beautiful

[theleelajoker]

@emil1234  

Well, you don't live in Ukraine? Or N Korea? Or in the slumps of Delhi?

@Deadpixel 

Everybody is different, but it you want to try something: 10 day Vipassana retreats  resulted in a "ups ok it's all one" awakening. Might work for you, just don't expect it to work:)

Edited September 10 by theleelajoker

[Aaron p]

Remember not to take it too seriously. Your human life is very short, if you were to get enlightened in the future you'd probably look back and think "why so serious?" 

One revelation I've got renewed recently is that it's not about some big achievement that you will be rewarded at the end of a near impossibly difficult journey. It's more about developing a caring and deeply intimate relationship with the person of God. It's not a thriller or a horror...it's a romcom.

Also all ideas are bullshit. Granted some will reflect and symbolise awakening more accurately. But they are still just reflections and symbols in the mind. Don't grasp to tightly to them ♥️

[emil1234]

@theleelajoker if you dont label anything everything is beautiful. ofc not labelling anything can be very very difficult when you are being tortured in a war torn country. but from the POV of pure consciousness everything is satisfactory 

[Clarence]

Try psychedelics.

[Carl-Richard]

Solipsism is not necessarily true. Consciousness is necessarily true.

Treating awakening as an escape will come back to bite you in the ass. Because awakening is no joke.

Edited September 11 by Carl-Richard

[Cathy92506]

14 hours ago, Deadpixel said:

For about four years, I've been on this journey, diving into Leo's work and trying to have what he calls "direct experiences." I've meditated, contemplated the ideas, and done the practices, but a lot of the time, I feel I'm still where I started at. I've had what I think were some fleeting glimpses—moments where the ordinary world felt thin or transparent—but they always feel so fragile. I can’t seem to hold onto them, and the a-ha feeling quickly fades. Soon enough, I'm back in my default worldview, and the doubts come flooding in.

The entire concept of solipsism initially terrified me. The thought of being completely alone, with everything and everyone being a projection of my own mind, felt like the ultimate nightmare. But lately, my perspective has completely flipped. Now, I'm finding a strange sense of comfort in the idea. The thought of a world with other people and a truly solid, external reality feels much more threatening than a world that's just me. There's so much to fear in a world of others: judgment, loss, and the unpredictability of human connection. The idea of being the absolute for eternity, able to create and insert myself into a dream world indistinguishable from "reality" whenever I get bored and need an adventure, feels like a serene and welcoming escape.

This is where I'm at now: I desperately want to fully know and experience that solipsism is true so I can stop this back-and-forth doubting. But the biggest fear I face is the thought that this is all just a story I'm telling myself to cope. I keep worrying that Leo's ideas are simply bullshit and that the terrifying, messy, "real" world is the only thing that actually exists. 

Is awakening even real.

I believe being "Awakened" is a spiritual fantasy. Rather, we are awakening. Because we are all human beings, we make mistakes, make bad decisions, blunder, etc. We all slip up.

I believe you have to first define what awakening is for you. Mine is reaching a level where you no longer idenitfy with your thoughts and feelings. You don't carry around that emotional baggage with you. You do this effortlessly throughout the days. But I make no claims that I've completely dissovled my ego.

So before you ask, "Is Awakening Even Real?" What does Awakening look like to you? I'm curious.

[Jehovah increases]

Of course, it is, yes, you can awaken to your true self, that being God, and it will blow your mind, and at first you won't believe it because it is just too radical for you to believe. It's going to take Psychedelics.

Edited September 11 by Jehovah increases

[Sugarcoat]

I think you can intuit that it’s real. By hearing “awakened people” speak you can pick up on authenticity, sensing that they’re genuinely coming from a place of, let’s say, no self, in contrast to others who speak from a place of self. This intuition can be developed, I think it’s related to your degree of openness, how dense your self is. But ideally you wanna confirm it in your own direct experience 

Also, what you consider “real” is anything with a limit. So if you adopt the idea that awakening is real, you can’t help but to put it into a category of “something”, “an experience”, like everything else, although an unique one. Awakening might not fit into that definition of “real”, because it transcends limitations.

Edited September 11 by Sugarcoat

[Natasha Tori Maru]

You might want to start with what you have defined as 'real' here - because where you go will be dictated by that.

 

[UnbornTao]

Until you personally have an awakening, you can simply trust that it is possible. It might seem paradoxical or nonsensical, and yet it is possible - for you and everyone else, just as they are now. After all, you already are you, and you are conscious. What's that about?

Be wary of mistaking the failure to grasp something for its being impossible. Particularly in this context, belief is detrimental. Relying on hearsay is worse than worthless. The truth is unknown; deepen that recognition. Become aware that, in your present experience, you really do not know - you aren't directly conscious of what existence is. Doing so should help you open up beyond your current knowledge and assumptions. From this state, you can question in a more real and powerful way.

The investigation is about what is actually true now. So, what is my nature? That is the core question to ask oneself. A breakthrough is the goal - not a conclusion, fantasy, philosophy, experience, idea, conviction, or worldview.

Edited September 11 by UnbornTao

[Mellowmarsh]

That which appears to awaken: never awakened.

Nothing is asleep everything is wide awake aliveness.

[Someone here]

On 10/09/2025 at 2:10 PM, Deadpixel said:

I've had what I think were some fleeting glimpses—moments where the ordinary world felt thin or transparent

Where is this "ordinary world " you are blabbering about? You ain't BS-ing anyone .this "ordinary world "if looked at properly is fucking GOD. but God's majesty is hiding itself in the ordinary precisely because if you see the world really as it is even for one second you will literally lose your frickin mind .

You didn't have ..you don't have ..and you will never have ..the slightest idea what the actual fuck is this very experience is. Nor will anyone ever have . And this should not scare you ..this is precisely the awakening you are seeking .

So It's a function of consciousness .raise your consciousness and you see God. Lower your consciousness and you see an "ordinary world ".

 

[Deadpixel]

@Jehovah increases I've done psychs many times, probably more than many people here, including 5-meo. And also dissociatives. When I'm on them it seems like I understand this "secret of the universe" but then when I come back I can't be certain it wasn't just hallucinations and delusions.

 

Edited Monday at 05:06 AM by Deadpixel

[Jehovah increases]

1 hour ago, Deadpixel said:

@Jehovah increases I've done psychs many times, probably more than many people here, including 5-meo. And also dissociatives. When I'm on them it seems like I understand this "secret of the universe" but then when I come back I can't be certain it wasn't just hallucinations and delusions.

 

Good question, I have also asked this question so many times.  If you awaken as God, you will know without any doubt that it is not a hallucination or delusion; you will connect to infinite intelligence. This very moment now is a hallucination, but a dream. Only you can know that you are God. There is information that gets downloaded when tripping that you could never know in your normal state. 

Edited Monday at 06:02 AM by Jehovah increases

[inFlow]

On 9/10/2025 at 2:10 PM, Deadpixel said:

Now, I'm finding a strange sense of comfort in the idea.

Starting to accept Truth.

 

On 9/10/2025 at 2:10 PM, Deadpixel said:

The idea of being the absolute for eternity, able to create and insert myself into a dream world indistinguishable from "reality" whenever I get bored and need an adventure, feels like a serene and welcoming escape.

These are just ideas in your mind. You have no idea what direct experience of that actually feels like. Don't rub it into your mind thinking that NOW you know it.

All of what you hear Leo talk to you is just ideas that feed the mind more, actually distracting you from this moment.

I can tell from my personal experience its such a tricky thing to stay in that state of consciousness. EVERYTHING has to be perfect, you must maintain a good balance everywhere. Sattvic lifestyle is key. Your thoughts have to be pure, you have to eat a very clean diet, no rajasic or tamasic foods, your body has to be strong, your meditation has to be consistent, and even then that state can dissapear in an instant if you let your thoughts run around. But when it holds, Oh... My.. God.. Everything is so clear, ignorace is gone in an instant, you understand how to live life. Don't get de-motivated by my words, step your game up, reaching there is no joke and no mental masturbation will get you there.

[theoneandnone]

I personally think awakening is just a special buzzword humans use of trying to grasp the unknown and thinking they’ve got it all figured out. So me personally no I think awakening is mumbo jumbo.

[Dauntment]

*shrugs*

Personally, I experienced it (7 grams of Penis Envy shrooms; wish I had more). It is fucking profound man...

Imagine like: Trying to recall the details "Life" (physics, your survival agenda, family/friends, politics...EVERYTHING) in the same way that you would your dream when you wake up from bed.

The 4 "pillars" I experienced:
1. A whisper-like disbelief claim of "oh...my...god....."

2. A repetition crescendo "OHHHHH MYYYYY FUUCCCCCCCCKINGGGG GODDDD!!!!!!" with each one being more intense and louder than the last

3. Realizing "THIS" is what religion is trying to point you to?!?!? ohhhhhhhhh

4. (Most importantly) Wanting to "share this": "HOWWW the FUCKKKKKKK am I supposed to communicate this?!?! (to "others" from "the dream")" but also realizing that there is no one to share it to.