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1. Ego fights the void of nothingness aloneness. 2. Ego makes it all about itself and can’t see the bigger picture. Those are the two boundaries depending on how you look at it.

Think of it like this, do you still hang unto that drunk state you were in whenever it was. That high from smoking weed. Plenty of people have had experiences from altered states using drugs or alcohol. One can feel soooooo good on even some pills, they feel ecstasy and joy and bliss, then back down to reality it is. Why do you think these drugs are so popular. They make one feel good. They alter your state. Some can feel love, even feel God as they say....Oh God, whatever...all states, all experiences then it's back to 'normal'. Doesn't mean you're high forever, doesn't mean you have changed and turned into an enlightened being doesn't mean Jack shit other than you've felt like you've had an experience of......whatever that is. Keep going? There is no next, there is no when, if, there, why because, after, in between.....none of that really exists. There is just timelessness energy appearing as, that's it. It can appear as a person thinking they're enlightened - all empty and void of substance. We have seemingly turned the Absolute into a shit show of limitation and stale cum. We have limited infinity and turned it into a climatic opera rehearsal where we can look forward to an exciting finish and go tell it on the mountains to our other delusional buddies waiting to feel that enlightened bliss from some altered state then telling the stale story to our other fools that think infinity is there as a theatre movement for them to witness and become something from. There is no here and now, now and then, here and there, no next, no because of and no other interjection, abbreviation adjective or whatever in this here immediacy of Absolute wholeness and nothingness fill with emptiness and bizarre oneness of splendor freedom and liberated cockroaches. Nothing can turn this into a theatre of shit show enlightenment, only this itself can be that. Energy can play around all it wants and be all it wants but it can never be what's next, it can never be what's to come, it can never be "keep goin", IT CAN ONLY BE WHAT IS AND WHAT IS IS ALL THERE IS. So even it's keep going with your awakening bullshit and i will be enlightened fantasy is still what is and can be nothing but what is so that awakening means Jack shit to what is because it is also what is "acting like" it's awakening to itself. Such drama it loves to create. Then it leaves that energy high and dry then having it's buddies cheer him on and say keep going like this is even moving. It ain't, its not standing still either. So your future enlightenment is a shit show enlightenment prank by the absolute as the absolute acting like it needs to be enlightened because it ain't got nothing else to do but fuck around and play around for infinity.

One time during a college lecture, I sat trying to focus on what the teacher was saying, and I noticed a kind of tension related to this, that I was trying really hard to hold my attention on every word, every word on the slide, every moment of the lecture. And when I noticed this tension, I chose to let it go, to let the tension dissolve. Then for a while, nothing much was different, only I felt a little lighter, more fluid. But then suddenly, it hit me. There is literally no time. Things are happening, but it's perfectly still, not moving, just being. It's a singularity morphing onto itself, but nothing moving it in time. And there is literally no me. All of me is plastered on the walls of the room. And this felt like ultimate groundlessness, like reality had disappeared beneath my feet. All that was left was a surging energy that was at the same time completely silent. I felt like my heart had sunk beneath my chest. I grasped my hands to my desk and clenched my leg muscles, trying not to die of terror. And then when the lecture ended, I exited the lecture with my friend, levitating, spending no effort in moving, and the singularity feeling was back as I was talking and making sounds, walking down the stairs, entering the bathroom stall, closing the door and telling myself to get it together. This was the result of more than 1000 hours of seated meditation practice, and more than 16000 hours of complete obsession to awaken. And it was then I decided to stop seeking, because enlightenment, at that stage, was too much for me. Being dead but alive, being in terror but in bliss, was the biggest Catch-22 situation I could have ever imagined. And I wanted out. Turns out that wasn't so easy, but that's another story. Anyways, I've been talking about "deconstruction" before and I felt that it didn't land for many people, maybe that it was too "mental" in its connotation, that it's something intellectual you do. But it's simpler than that. It's just about letting go of whatever thing or process that might be holding you back from experiencing reality as it is. It can be as subtle as a tension associated with focusing on what somebody is saying, or it can be as gross as the sensation of sitting in a room right now and that there is a house surrounding it and that there is a world outside the house and that there is a universe outside the world. Every tension, every feeling of solidity, every ground, every roof, every level, every notion of reality, must be let go of. - Jan Esmann While you can distinguish letting go from the concept of "technique", it can also be thought of as a technique, if you practice it. And practicing letting go in meditation can be quite explosive. It's not necessarily as light and non-confrontational as "ah I'll just let go and sit here and just be still". It can be a quite visceral and energetic process. It can cause all kinds of movements and releases, both physically in the body and emotionally. And using other techniques are in a sense tools for helping you getting to the place of letting go, where letting go gets you to the place you want to go. Because training your focus through focused meditation, or elevating your energy through psychedelics, matters, but they will do nothing if you do not let go. You can take psychedelics and flail around, trying your best to hold on without dissolving into nothingness, and you may be successful in doing so, if not for some intense suffering, but it will not lead you to an expanded state unless you let go. And that's what suffering is about. It's when you can't for the life of you let go. And you keep holding on despite what reality wants you to do, to just accept it. Anyways, even people who are big proponents of psychedelics and who also are big proponents of the non-dual perspective, emphasize the importance of letting go: - Martin Ball And of course, other non-dual proponents say the same thing: - Ramana Maharshi - Rupert Spira And letting go and seeing reality for what it is is synonymous with truth. Just like how Leo says truth is the highest value, letting go is the ultimate meditation, because letting go reveals what is true.

I would go even further and say the brain is still clinging to a self and is too materialistic. Everything is happening inside conscious experience but I agree that it’s a void of nothingness pure light signals and interpretations and random labels. What a mind fuck what even is a mind am I a mind? There’s no me there’s just a dream playing with itself hell even dream is a label and even the world label is another random blip of information to infinity and beyyyoonndddd

@theoneandnoneYou dont exist. You are a decoherence pattern of the dream. It needs it or all of the machines in Gods dream would just kill themselves. The only thing that exists is God and its decoherence pattern which is you. The decoherence pattern creates karma, which is loops in the dream that God (the machine) didnt agree with. God and you are one, the machine and the dream are one thing. You are just a thought, you are a made up idea that other machines told your machine existed. Literally reality is inside of your brain, you are witnessing reality from inside your body its not outside. Pretend behind the computer screen is your own brain matter. Theres no one in else in your head. If I cut your eyeballs out you would still be there in your body in the dark. What the eyes do is shine light (information like code) into the brain and the light is deciphered by the brain and projects an image into the brain where you witness it. So you arent in looking out into a reality reality is being beemed to you in a dark void. When you say you are talking to people there is no one in that person. Its a 2 dimensional image of light being projected into the brain with no one in it. Its just light. Since the light cant be objectified (its just an unknown light source coming from you have no idea where. You cant know if what the people are saying is truthful since they are just 2 D with no one doing logic in them in your direct experience via this logic.) And sound isnt being heard from anywhere (Its rumbles in an ear that you arent as you can go deaf and you are still there. You are somewhere else hearing the sound from the ear. The ear is sending information into the same space as the eyes are. This is the same for all senses. So reality is just an unknown light rumblings and feelings all happening around this nothingness. Thats God and you are just a voice is created so that it wouldnt kill itself and it could survive. Life is sensations in a void. The void makes up sensations they arent even real cause they arent happening to anything. But since God is infinite there is even another thing that it is in your direct experience. God means not that.

I realised Infinite Love is just product of this nothingness to keep me dream again.There is no more fear of experiencing nothingness now.

I had this thought while watching Leo's video and reading this quote from Ramana maharshi "Only that which existsts in deep, dreamless sleep is real." Is this pure Truth, which appears to simply be Nothingness, more fundamental than consciousness / experience? Or is Truth itself an experience?

Since this post is so long, you can just read the summery in parentheses after each paragraph. We have experiences, build correlations, identify patters, materialize desires, externalize needs and project them onto objects, destinations, lifestyles. We wire our mind, connect one sensation onto another, intertwine it with emotions, project and create experiences, entangle ourselves in reality, connect dots, try to make sense, find out what stays consistent, pursue what we correlate with meaning, react based on our understanding, preference, model of reality. We go meta, analyze from a higher vantage point, take on new axioms, untangle one experience from the other, build new context, strive to be more objective, less biased, less self-indulgent, more understanding, more aware of the big picture, a holistic view of where we are, what we are, how we are, why we are, that we are, to see our assumptions as assumptions, identify our intent and its source, arising experience for what it is, figure out how to do that, continue to intuit, explore, experience, be. (Sensations form constellations) Reality has many dimensions, its a sphere we can subdivide, cut into pieces, we can use the pieces to create things, shapes, forms, objects, subjects, selves. The way we connect these things, the way we cognize and make sense, the way we wire sensations with desires, impulses, drives, the way those emerge higher understanding, models, realities. We construct reality, aware or unaware of how we do it. We move our body, choose our activities, consciously or unconsciously, there are many layers of understanding and interpretation, mechanics, explanations, sciences, consistencies, nature, invisible forces, perceived changes, cycles, repetitions, patterns. The conscious and unconscious inflect upon each other to polarize into individual experiences. (Their arrangement is arbitrary) Do we have control? What is control? Is there such a thing as control? Reality flows, we make decisions, we think we make decisions, something makes decisions, we feel the drives within us, the impulses that adjust behavior, manipulate reality. Are we the ones doing it? The self, a constellation, accumulation of patters, ideas, behaviors, acquired tendencies, a reflection of the world it is apart of and yet distinctly itself, creating reality inside out and entangling itself with it, holistically interacting across multiple domains? Do I make decisions or am I simply a conglomerate of the cells that make me deciding as a hive, gut, heart, brain, the personalities within me, the arising desires. Even so, the problem doesn't dissipate, if my cells make the decisions, even then, that which I believe myself to be would simply adjust to be their emergent property, in a way it doesn't matter, since I'd still be every single one of these cells and the emergent, us making decisions or me really becomes the same thing, if will is made on a lower substrate, then the higher is not without will but a more complex expression. But that's just a theory, idea, will is an axiom, ascribed, the self is an axiom, and science is figuring it out under the assumption that it exists, there is something of a gestalt. (The ego is a gestalt) Maybe the perceiver is an illusion, all these unique forces of nature align to create the gestalt I perceive, I believe myself to be. But the duality of a perceiver separates it from the perceived. Yet all it ever sees and knows and can experience is so by virtue of being an experience perceived, by definition not the perceiver. And yet, all of that appears to come out of the perceiver, or flow through it, it is entangled by virtue of being perceived. Let's collapse the duality of perceiver and perceived. In that case everything is perceived or perceiver, let's call it capital P Perception. Perception is being, experiencing, though what about the unperceived, unexperienced, the thoughts that pass through perception and disappear back into the subconscious/unconscious aether. (The duality of perceiver and perceived collapses) There is a duality of the present experience as Perception and on the other hand the known to exist potential unactualized, dematerialized, hidden away. Of all the possible experience, one possibility is currently the case in Perception. Imagine blue, imagine red, now blue is gone but its still in the local subconscious, we can bring it back out, shuffle those two, combine them, but there is much more in the yet unconscious, random ideas we can remember, associate, spawn, an elephant, where did it come from? It wasn't there, now it is. (There is a vast hidden reality beyond the current Experience) Nothingness is the guitar string at rest, in tension, in its original formlessness, without sound, without experience, no action, pure being, all contained, itself empty, Shiva. Objects, ideas, the omni-dimensional fabric of reality, unentangled, pure, detached, without form, without purpose, without assumption, axioms, impulses, unease, tension, drives creating conflict and pursuit, the feeling of separation, the duality of selfishness and selflessness, of love and hate and apathy, and the entropy towards Unity. The ultimate nothing, the nothing that excludes itself, the idea that goes meta, cuts its tail and self-annihilates. The kundalini that burns all karma, the freedom of being content, fulfilled, untangled, of being where one wants to be, more even, the collapse of all dualities create a no-space, no-distance, everything already is, nowhere to go, nowhere to be, a singularity that merges all and annihilates all distance. Now there is no story, no protagonist, no world, no being nor non-being, neither isness nor non-isness, when all dualities, all pointers collapse themselves. (Nothingness collapses all forms into the base state) Nothingness is the realization that any constellation of experience is possible, that any arrangement of forms is arbitrary. That any desire connects itself to other sensations creating a gestalt. Forms keep themselves afloat, they link and associate themselves to other forms, creating pathways, roads, directions, cycles, stories, experiences, dependent arising/origination whose contrast creates an actual Duality that correspondingly spawns the idea of itself, through identification of the inherent difference of perception, which is created inside out through sensory perception, but on a larger scale the universe really takes that form in order for it to become the experience of an individual to be processed and interpreted further. But that actuality is a higher form of the same phenomenon, invisible forces, laws of physics, dependent origination, complexifying and turning itself into self-perceiving observers made conscious through the perception of those more universal forms. There is consciousness and within it infinite forms. (The universe splits itself into dualities and experiences itself through entities) This isn't a reason to despair into nihilism, nihilism ultimately inflects upon itself and dissolves as well. Purpose is self-determined, socially expanded/contextualized/harmonized, God a dreamer across infinite dimensions, lifeforms arrange themselves creating tendencies and desires, exploring the universe. We use senses to create ourselves, cognition to understand ourselves explicitly, through intuition implicitly, our brain is both dual and non-dual, left and right hemisphere, order and chaos, form and creativity that arises from the formless. We are created and on a higher level create ourselves, our awareness of the process is variable, dualities form different interpretations and collapse into higher self-understanding. (We create and experience ourselves through dualities and exist independently in the formless) We build systems, sciences, mathematics, physics, biology, they are self-contained systems, maps, a conceptual reflection of reality, a variable progressing technical mechanistic understanding, we try to unite them through formulas, strive to achieve complete consistency. Reality is outside of that, it is Meta. We use these rules to understand correlations, to manipulate reality, but reality can always go meta, can always be more. In a new realization, it itself becomes the past, a lens of perception, interpretation, correlation, constellation. But it is cut off from the ever rejuvenating present that transcends it and expands itself non-linearly by creating new patterns that are retroactively integrated, universal intelligence, Chitta. (Systems are self-contained mechanically consistent models that correspond or correlate with specific aspects of reality, but reality is infinitely more meta) Pragmatically, we keep ideas, models, relations in our mind, but there is a force capable of instant understanding, the source of creation, a cosmic intelligence that leads one to understand what a thing is in itself, unmeasured by contrast, untainted by preference, bias, desire. I am attached to models, understanding, but there is a force that transcends and skips all that by going beyond and becoming the thing it seeks to understand, foregoing all the complicated dualistic calculations that try to understand a thing through its correlation with other things. An awareness, that sees and knows, an intuition that feels, a top-down understanding and the more I break away from creating systems, that more I access it, but its always beyond. If I want to create something in this dualistic world, then I conceptualize, associate and relate what I know, then use this knowledge to create. But to use this transcendent intelligence is go straight to the source of one's desire and work top down, breaking the top holon into the simplest pieces necessary to replicate it and discovering new patterns in the process. (There is a cosmic top-down intelligence that arises spontaneously to those with an empty mind) One has goals, dualities created for the pursuit of happiness, but the pursuit itself creates separation, and yet that pursuit itself is the result of a previous state of unhappiness, it is an attempt to solve it, but it is a separate overlay, a distinction created to externally resolve a corresponding projected image of an internal state. That internal state however is a result of one's own self-understanding and psyche, self-image, the belief that the external shall inform the internal, that internal feelings ought to correspond to external achievements or environments. This dichotomy itself is the problem, internal states are self-regulated, self-imposed, self-determined, it is simply the lack of consciousness that prevented one from seeing that all internal feelings are a self-determined correspondence to external reality. Wants and desires are subconsciously wired to the allowance of the experience of happiness, initially they are wired for survival, after this when a model of reality is constructed in childhood, reality is far more variable and flexible, but with oughts/shoulds and expectations a pattern of gratification, of conditioned happiness is developed, assumed objective, assumed real, believed into existence, a self-fulfilling prophecy, a blindspot, a mechanic system of beliefs but greater reality transcends the limitations that the ego loses itself in. (Happiness is natural state that the ego separates itself from through conditions) Unity -> Duality -> Arrangement -> Interpretation -> Systems -> Consistency -> Mechanics -> Knowledge -> "Facts" -> Ego Ego -> Adaptation -> Exploration -> Change -> Transience -> Dynamicism -> Awareness -> Ego-Death -> Non-Duality -> Unity The world we see is an arrangement of many patterns, physically seeming properties, idea constructs, but they're dynamic, they reference an ever morphing system. Any idea, word, sentence is an attempt, a pointer towards an aspect of reality, ideas are absolute by themselves as definitions but are really just a map, not the territory. There is a process that creates the very ideas separate from territory. There is a process that creates the very territory itself. And there is a process that correlates the territory with maps and brings those maps into awareness as a bridge, (The map is not the territory but the process that allows for the creation of maps is quite fascinating) Everything is actual but some things are more directly actual than others. Actual Nothing -> Actual Something -> (Actual) Idea of Something -> (Actual) Idea of Nothing Though this is still a duality, if the territory is the truth, then the map is part of the territory, The map is a subset of the territory that creates a systemized reflection through available mechanisms. And then there is the territory itself, an uninterpreted, unsystemized non-dual experience of something that can be described through a thousand lenses and gives rise to any and all interpretations and creates a dozen dualities. The experience itself: "Actuality", of course actuality is a duality, or it can be used as such, clearly by the very fact of the existence of a word, it points to something and by pointing to something it points away from somewhere else. Actuality as a duality points to that territory from which all maps arise, it points away from the maps and onto the thing itself left uninterpreted. The greater capital Actuality however encompasses the map and dissolves the duality, the focus dissipates, everything becomes experience, including the process of creating maps and the maps themselves, the duality and objectification of the separation disappears. Everything becomes the territory, but that fact can only be understood by transcending the journey from where one stands, which is often from inside the duality that is to dissolve. (The map is actually a subset of the territory and merges with it in Non-Duality) In summery, Non-Dual Nothingness is the fabric of all being, it takes forms creating dualities and distinctions, creating objects and subjects and maps that are a subset of reality, any one thing can be interpreted in a million ways by a million lenses through association, distinction, pattern recognition. When Non-Dual Nothingness is paired as a duality with Non-Dual Infinity, that duality itself can be dissolved into a larger Non-Duality. Where everything is only and ever itself, all contexts can arise and are themselves as well. A superposition of any thing, a superposition of any combination, a superposition of any interpretation. A superposition of every pattern, the combination of any pattern with any other pattern in any constellation in relation to any other constellation, in any form or time, or relation, or entropy, contextualized and actualized in the infinite dream. (Nothingness and Infinity are two sides of the same coin and that coin itself is a superposition of anything and everything in any context and every context infinitely interconnected and intermerged in relation and contrasted to any and all other possibilities. To go meta is to transcend and include and the ultimate meta is that which transcends and includes everything including nothing and itself)

Some people have no idea how to 'spot' the Absolute in every day life. I see it everyday. I notice the nothingness of existence. Shit just pops outta nowhere. The phone rings and an unexpected person is on the other end. That's nothing appearing as....everyone that calls is this appearing as but ilm saying I'll notice it more when there's a surprise call. A sudden thunderstorm pops up, out of nowhere that's the Absolute appearing as. It's all the Absolute appearing as but I'm saying when I notice or recognize as it's happening. The same kind of thing like the brain's RAS system where it only notices things that are relevant to the storyline and how tons of things are happening around us all the time but we only pay attention to what's being focused on or relevant to us and block out things that aren't. Something like that. That old post by Raazard about Solipsism from I believe last year or the year before that's taking front stage again and is hot again right now, just became hot again out of nowhere. These kinds of things I mean that we take for granted and give cause and effect meaning to. There was no real cause and effect for why that old thread suddenly got back on the radar. That's this appearing as... and without meaning and purpose for why that thread became hot again. It's actually a brand new thread but seems to be the old one. Everything is brand new. Your house isn't the same house it's timelessly appearing to the observer as a new house. When someone's habits just drastically changes, that's this appearing as.....Like I said, it's all this appearing as but i'm just pointing out a few for this post. When a plane goes by up above and disappears into nothing. A thread pops up out of nowhere. Somebody started a thread out of nothing. A thought pops up and disappears into nothing. You look into the distance till it starts getting blurry and you can't see pass a certain distance, there's nothing there. When my hand moves, that's energy, talking is vibrational. I mean, it's all around us but we wait to see flying saucers or take magic pills or sit in lotus positions before we can train ourselves to be in a certain desired state to see the Divine. It's everywhere. Psychedelic users will especially have it hard to see the Divine normally because it has seen extraordinary things through that scope and lens and, that high, there's no match for so everything seems dull and mundane without it. Its still sometimes dull and mundane to me too but I can see it in the dull and mundane, is what I'm saying. When you log into the forum and see user names, there's no one there, it's this appearing as user names.

@Princess Arabia It sounds like you’re not just theorizing but speaking from a place where identity has collapsed. But I also feel your deconstructive framework is incomplete. Not wrong, just locked in a very specific loop that you might not be seeing. You often say things like “there is no experience,” “nothing is happening,” or “this is just a dream talking to itself.” But the very fact that you're saying it, using communication, expressing meaning and carrying intention, already contradicts the negation you're trying to express. Even if we say “there is no one saying this,” the saying is still happening. Even if nothing is the speaker, then that nothing is now modulating as forum dialogue. So your argument still depends on what it denies: the fact of arising and of meaning-making. Yes, the separate self is an illusion, experience has no true owner and awakening isn’t an event or achievement but the falling away of story/narratives, but it’s a mistake to stop there. It seems like you draw from that insight the conclusion that all appearance is meaningless, that everything is just the dream continuing itself or that awakening is a kind of feedback loop inside the illusion. But when you use that to flatten everything into “just dreaming,” you also flatten love, insight, creativity and reflection, all of which are equally expressions of that same nothingness. You seem to think that because there’s no “you” experiencing, there’s no experience at all. But even the statement “there’s no experience” is something arising. So is the writing or the reply. Something is clearly happenin, not to someone, not by someone, but as itself (or Being doing itsef). So the dream in a sense is Real, though not as a fallback into duality, but as the realization that what appears and what is are not in conflict. Like they write in the heart sutra "form is emptiness, emptiness is form". So technically speaking, if you call everything “just dream” (including your own expressions) then you end up undermining the very ground from which you're speaking. So challenge your deconstruction and the finality with which you might hold it. If your seeing has brought you to pure no-self, but from there everything collapses into “nothing happening,” it is missing the capacity to reveal what is happening. What follows is not a return to duality, but Being as itself, a living presence that gives rise to meaning, not a nihilistic, dead, presence that lacks meaning.

Only once on 4, 5 or 7.5g of mushrooms (don't remember, wish I'd kept track) did I go through all of that to God realization. It was 1.5 year ago. I think I did scream or grunt on my way to the complete OBE (sorry neighbours ), infinite hallucination emanating from a single all encompassing point. It's all too faint now but I do remember on the come up being floored on my rug thinking "oh no, ohno, oh no", blind-sighted by imminent death, reality getting asymptotically more real than ever before. My life leading up to this point flashing before my eyes. Then the infinitely unfolding fractal of nothingness that felt timeless and spaceless, a state that fostered incredible insights I'm sure, but didn't allow for any symbolic understanding. Simply too foreign for me to recall even the very next day. Descending from that non-human black hole portion of the trip, I remember moaning in agony as I reconstituted myself, slowly emerging back into my body, feeling metabolically drained perhaps from having been turned into a soup . But as time progressed more and more, the "death" feeling sublimated into an existential orgasm imbued with the understanding that life is just god's playground, with a felt sense of self design, of immanence. This was nirvana, bliss, all of it! When the moment passed I sat up cross-legged in front of the full body mirror, marvelled at myself and started contemplating memories of my family, of childhood and so on. This is where it turned into God realization, where for the first time in my life, after years of listening to Leo harp on about infinite imagination with deaf ears, I really considered the possibility that despite the convincing lore, all of it is imaginary, and in this elevated state, grasped it. This current moment is eternal, anything outside of it isn't real. It's ACTUALLY TOTAL, and unitary, making thoughts of family members or past events just this: thoughts, faint images in the mind. Now I didn't verbalise it like this at the time, I just started saying "oh my god, oh my GOD, OH MY GOD". I lost my historical reality, I was left with pure now, and nothing else. It felt like the correct order of things was reestablished, with that weird sense of familiarity too. All of reality was radically recontextualized (shoutout) into something that is causing itself right now, from within. A miracle, from which emanates a human life with memories and notions of progression, good and bad and so on. It was so awesome to finally understand life! It took some 8 to 10 trips before breaking through like this. Ofc I'm not conscious of any of this on the daily. As a human I'm dysfunctional af.

Your pain is freedom. Your suffering is freedom. Your heartache is freedom. Your panic attack is freedom. All your so-called problems, challenges and issues that's freedom. That's all unconditional love. Murder is unconditional love murdering. It doesn't even know what that is. Us fake humans, which is also freedom being that, calls it murder but its energy playing with itself. It doesn't see murder it doesn't see at all. It's just being itself and to a human it seems like murder. Everything, every circumstance, every situation is freedom/nothing/wholeness/energy/god/allah/mohamed/shiva/brahman/the absolute/this/all there is/nothingness/emptiness/source/whatever the fuck it wants to call itself is it. How can this not feel like insanity.

There were never any brain cells that were yours to be lost. Just like you 'lost' your awakening back to nothingness because it was never yours to begin with, brain cells are just brain cells-ing. They cannot be lost because they were never owned.

Thats what dying is. Its like being put on a timeout in a dark room that you cant move think hear or speak in. You cant look away and you have to sit there and deal with it. Eventuall you deal with it and respawn but you dont know when. So you come to a peaceful state where you just stop struggling and stare for infinite time. You are stuck in nothingness right now you just can't handle it so you pretend something is here.

Thanks, now my sleep is good my big baguette brain has more and more good ideas. No "Human" "ego" "can be" "afraid" of "something" But "alien" "ego" "hsyio564654 '444" "dddd" "dxxXXXXXXXXX àà""... Fear of being "castrated", being "less powerful than other human" and even "being hurt" because of that, but in nothingness they are no support even for fear. You need a support for fear, that's "something" "somewhere" No need to be in nothingness btw you can castrate "fear" right now with drugs for example (benzos, opiates...)

I mean you imagine the fear of being castrated of senses. But you're already stuck in a dream with only five senses. That's why babies cry at birth; they go from a state of omnipotence to castration, to limits; this traumas has already been experienced. And if you're capable of being afraid, it's because you always have an ego that imagines limits. Fear is symbolic, so it's not really nothingness. Nothingness still can't exist, by the way. As Bashar would say, the quality of nothingness is that it can't exist, lol.

But couldn’t certain drugs like 5 Meo awaken you to nothing? Because for me it felt like I got closer to it I can recognize it’s not a dream state though I don’t believe the mystical nothingness is same as the “nothingness “ in my dream, for sure, I just called it a KIND of nothingness

Look, nothingness is not a dream like state nor a drug like state, it's only like that when you don't let go of the concepts you have about reality. So pure awarness does not mean you will not have your 5 senses. In that dream you had, the collective society ego consciousness (agent smith) made you believe that, based on what you know about reality.

You read too much about nothingness from people who did not achieve nothingness.

@Sugarcoat I see, let's say nothingness is neither of that, it's up for grabs. Sounds good, good luck.

Nothingness doesn’t have to mean absence of the current appearance. Limitlessness is nothing, because everything that is something is limited. So this moment may be nothing, meaning if you awoke to it you’d still perceive this moment but without the sense of “something” (limitation) Well when we dream at night, it’s like we are conscious of nothing EXCEPT the activity of our own mind. You don’t see anything with your eyes when you dream, or any other sense. So it’s almost close to that hypothetical “nothingness” state I wrote

I get occasional sleep paralysis. Some years back I had it like every week, and I very quickly learned to enjoy it. I enjoy weird hallucinations of the mind. I think I’m perfect candidate for psychedelics… I have made significant improvements to my everyday state compared to a year back. But yes there’s potential for more. I feel some resistance to studying ngl , started studying recently, so would be cool to develop myself in that area. But then again some things are “supposed” to be hard. The process of learning requires a degree of friction for most (because it takes effort to understand) It’s a self (something) in nothingness I’d say (it’s nothingness from the pov of the self) Maybe there is an objective world that exists even if our perception is off Btw I don’t really wonder much about this sense-less state, I’m more fascinated by dreams in themselves (or just altered states of mind in general)

@Sugarcoat Isn't this what nothingness awakening is? Your senses are gone but your self doesnt go away. I think its something like that, because otherwise, how can people report it? And most who report this kind of awakening said that they were terrified by it, meaning the self was there. I think we do get into contact with nothingness everynight(deep sleep), but we just aren't aware of it(avidya/ignorance) we are not conscious in nothingness, thus we are ignorant of this facet of the self.

I see you're pioneering new ways to enjoy suffering. If you did the same but in a more useful direction, you'd have a better time. For instance, imagine you'd be satisfied with the present, meditating and doing mundane chores, working or studying now, despite discomfort, regardless of your experience. To engage with your story - is that really nothingness? It is seen as an absence of sense perceptions as you now know them. We could also imagine that other animals have different sense perceptions than ours; since we don't, there's no problem for us in this domain. Not sure what I'm saying, anyway.

It gets so booring after some years to do this Those who are starting with this maybe they see it like something paranormal, but in the beginning it's mostly hallucination, not real. When you encounter the real it gets boring. Wanna know why? You see the illusion of the human ego, society and is only made up things, made up spiritual experiences from the collective ego, made up levels of astral bodies, and when you see all that lie, all those fancy spiritual things and fake feelings pushed from society unto you and you decide to go your own way, then everything dissolves and society gets boring. Gets boring to fake astral project per example, people only know what collective ego feeds them, the fancy, and they are stuck there, in OWE and start conceptualizing about reality and nothingness and is just all lies. So beware next time you have a fake spiritual awakening and fancy things of halluciantory, drug like states. Awakening is so real that you don't have time to hallucinate, you just live as you like, the fancy is a lie. DISCLAIMER This is from somebody who can communicate with the spirits of the dead. They are all around us, once you open your third eye you can contact with them, if you think they don't exist you are still trapped in the matrix. There are 2 facets of reality, one real and the other fake and as i said above, the majority who claim to be gods they are trapped in a fake world make up for them from the collective ego of society, wich the movie matrix call agent smith.