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  1. Let me tell you a story. The Awakened One does not make assumptions. The Awakened one has Evolved from the Sleeping Self that only sees as far as he is. He Knows ALL and Sees ALL perfectly of the old way/self/selves. A 3D world understands fully a 2D world, A 2D world does not even know of a 3D to begin to understand. Ultimately, there are no right or wrongs but the fact that it disturbed your peace indicates denial of truth behind the matter itself. Never confuse Natural with good or bad, Natural always comes first. This will make sense as you evolve. All the best
  2. Interesting thing about awakening,prior to it, I had never read a religious scripture,esoteric writing or philosophy text in my life. Mostly because it didn't make much since and I assumed most,if not all of it,to be written based on myth and philosophy. After awakening I started looking into some of these writings and texts and, surprisingly, found I could understand the bulk of what was being said. From the eastern writings like the vedas, upanishads, baghavad gita, tao te ching, etc.,- to the christian mystics,NT bible,western esoteric writings etc., I haven't looked at the Quran,but from these writings and text's I have looked into, they all carry very similar messages about the "Reality" or "God." The reason,and what can only be the reason, imo, is the ones who wrote or delivered those words in spoken and written form were speaking from an awakened and/or realized state. Not some made up philosophy or religion,which they were later turned into. Undoubtedly there is also the mix of myth and metaphor as well, depending on the culture in which they were written,but the central messages and themes are very similar across the board in reference to God or Reality.
  3. There definitely can be a position of power which can be abused by the 'guru' but I'm not going to assume that's what is going on. People who have followers/fans/students and the like have to be cautious about the dynamic between them and sure to not abuse that power they have. In the situation of a guru like persona who claims some enlightened state they should not be slaves to the selfish desire even if there are desires that still manifest. I have found in my own experience that in the most awakened states there aren't any desires that arise in me....but I don't make any claim of anything.
  4. @Scholar Those are some good questions. My mind wants to simplify the issue. Yet, it's very nuanced and complex as you are finding. You wrote: "But then when I look at the suffering there is something about it that I cannot explain in words that makes it seem like it is bad. I just can't articulate it, but then there is also something that makes it seem like just another experience, that I cannot articulate either." I go through this a lot. Perhaps it's a paradox. For example, sometimes "spirituality" seems so impersonal. There is no "I". The true "me" is one with everything. There is nothing to do than to be in the present moment. It's so amazingly simple. Yet, it also seems so personal. The spiritual journey feels deeply personal. My direct experience feels personal. There is a desire to grow and evolve. What if we stepped away from the term "bad"? And thought of suffering as energy. There are many forms of energy. Suffering seems like a seeking energy. An energetic yearning for a different present moment. Perhaps the seeking energy can be mild or it can be very strong. When I see an animal experiencing pain, they don't seem to have the same type of seeking energy as humans. They seem to be experiencing the pain in the present moment and may avoid the source of the pain. Yet, they don't seem to have the same type of yearning and struggling as humans. The sense of powerless and loss of control. The thinking about how things could be better if only such-and-such happens. Have you listened to awakened spiritual teachers on suffering? That might shed some insight. I've never done a solo retreat. Yet, boredom over extended periods and not being able to leave would likely lead to a degree of suffering for me. Yet, it probably wouldn't cause any permanent harm.
  5. i agreee eckhart's was spontaneous.. i think depending on the teacher, and what their path was like... it is all reflected in their teaching also i think that a lof of the gurus refer to the simplicity of seeing thru the illusion but it's only really AFTER the fact that they say this i dont think they are deliousion, far from it lol - i dont even need to say this but when they say, or eckhart says IT IS HERE NOW! just NOW. simply NOW it's easy for them to see it as they are speaking from that place of NOW vs the rest of us could be a billion miles away from the NOW (billion mental illusory miles) but yeah. i agree with you. the work that needs to be put in is massive it's no easy task especially since it is a sub-task for most of us, unless we can , like Leo, work towards making a life purpose in which we end up working in this field of study and making a living to be able to continue to do this work and not worry about paying the bills my goal personally is somehow winnging the lotto (using mind/law of attraction/positive vibes to get that lol) and then after lotto, meditate away and enjoy and go deeper into it i am not after the money (or so i think now, hopefully i wont change after getting the money) but yeah. i am after the freedom which money will give me which allows me to do this work uninterrupted or worrying a guru would tell me here, i am just setting up this obstacle for myself to delay the work which needs to be done. but from my full time work job which i very much need if i need to survive on the month-month bills i got. i cant bring myself to full dive into it... and the next thing i know is i have lost my mind and cannot work anymore and then lose my house/job/car lotto > freedom > eventual enlightment LETS GET THAT MONEY SO IT CAN GET ME ENLIGHTMENT SO THEN I CAN LOOK BACK AS ALL AWAKENED SOULS DO AND GO LIKE WOOAH. WAS "I" A CRAZY LIL NUT OR WAAT?
  6. We have to be really careful with this though. haha I used to be a Christian and this sounds like my dad when he would say "They aren't true Christians." due to the things someone would say. With Bodhisattva's, the definition is "a person who is able to reach nirvana but delays doing so out of compassion in order to save suffering beings.". Bodhisattva's are tricky characters because they may not necessary speak about awakening with the public, but they know of it in their inner life. They are not necessarily obvious and outspoken in the way that maybe Eckhart Tolle or Alan Watts are. It's through small Freudian slips and pointers that make you realize "oh, maybe this guy or girls is awake but is just hiding it because they think it would be more effective if they did." Jordan Peterson comes across to me as a Christian mystic , who might have awakened haha, who is trying to bridge the gap between Christianity and science. And he needs to tread really carefully with this. When a friend or a coworker seems to be having a problem, I do not speak to them about non-duality. In many of my social circles, I do not think it would be helpful to push people towards "awakening". Sometimes the next best step is to help people within the dream and give them a sense of relief within the dream. Which I think Jordan Peterson seems to be doing. haha But you are right, I do need to take Peterson off the pedestal I put him on though. And maybe I have rose colored glasses on when I watch his videos. And I need to be more critical about his work.
  7. @GafaRassaDaba That sounds like a really rough entry and I feel for you. You must have been pretty open minded before the trip, to have such a glimpse. I hope you can remain open minded. As you’ve already experienced, sometimes what you know most, turns out to be opposite, and sometimes the depth makes precisely that difference. Psychadelics are a throw of the dice, I wouldn’t rule them out & assume you’ve digested the big picture, but I would look into some daily practices & theory to build a foundation first. As an analogy, I feel like you saw the photo, and now as you experience more, and surrender, let it settle, the details come more into focus, making all the difference. Some find freedom in infinity, some find unification in no-self, some find inner peace in love, some an effortlessness & synchronicity in their days. All of this is for you too. All of it. So if you can empty the cup again, there’s more. The one thing we can’t do, is filter now, through a lens of the past, through a memory, through a projection. That, begins the weaving of an “I” which “knows”. On a more personal, and relative note - Yogananda was awakened as a fetus. You might be one of those rare birds born with high consciousness, but not yet aware of this. There may very well be a GafaRassaDaba sized map in this yet.
  8. A Bodhisattva is someone who has awakened. That ain't JP.
  9. I think and feel like you. I hate this society, the system, the rat-race slavery and how dumb are people are nowadays. And in the future, according the elites agenda to only be one mixed race, more dumb, easily governable, zombies of instant gratification. Sometimes I think I dont want to have children to make them struggle in this modern slavery of agressive competition and, mainstream conditioning and indoctrination. I also feel alone and misunderstood, Im not interested of my friends, like you say they are like dogs. I'd like to have awakened friends like me and have interesting . The key to feel better is gratitude. Life is a gift and experiencing it as pure awareness living a human experience seeing, tasting, smelling, breathing is sacred and beautiful.
  10. @sgn It's got nothing to do with reality or facts. If you get triggered, that's ALL you! It's all about how your mind is failing to understanding the complexities of reality, denying reality. The reality is, people eat animals and you don't like it. That's not the world's problem, that's your problem. Don't project it on them. Own it. Triggering is never in the situation, it's in YOUR interpretation of the situation. If you were fully awakened, Hitler himself torturing kittens would not trigger you.
  11. ive also had a paranormal experience (seeing a ghost or spirit) for context im 20 years old and have never had any similar experiences until I had an awakening and started meditating this year so i can say that in my experience there are other 'realms' which can be perceived in our own i have a speculation or intuition that these experiences only happen to those who are not afraid (or in other words those who are awakened to some degree). but im just speculating
  12. Yes, that's what i feel, but I don't want to push her, like i am a needy person,. Ajasatya said i must be healthy, I don't know how to react in a healthy way,. I understand mind because our job here is self awareness, i know minds are not working like that, being numb? And you don't feel any emotions anymore? Is imposible right??? Unless you are awakened i guess? Maybe i'm wrong, i promise to myself I don't want a girl in my life because i'm just fixing my life situation to have money, because i am not ready , but I can't keep that promise hahah!! I don't want to repress my sexuality for the sake of my problem.. yes sexuality is an illusion but right now i have that right now
  13. For me, it was important to let go of my conventional understanding of the terms. The conventional use of the term "everything" includes things outside of other things. Example: The house fire destroyed everything (in the house). In common language, we don't use the term "everything" to *really* mean everything. Rather, we mean every - thing (every individual thing) that we separate out from other things. Here, we mean every individual object inside the house. This is a very limited use of "everything" as it doesn't include any-thing outside of the house. If someone said "The house fire destroyed everything" - we assume this doesn't *really* mean everything. Just the every single thing in the house. When someone who is awakened to this uses the term "everything" it can seem odd because the listener has never heard it used in this context and has never themself used the term in this context. There has always been a limit to everything and one could conceive of some-thing outside of everything. Yet here, we really, really do mean everything. No limits. No "I like everything", "everything she cooks. . .". We mean everything with no limit or condition. If it really is everything, then all individual things are included in everything. ALL things are within everything. This is a radically different way to use the term. . . Here, there is no - thing (no individual thing) outside of every - thing. So, every-thing is no-thing. Now, the term "everything" doesn't make conventional sense, so some people may use other terms like absolute infinity rather than absolutely everything.
  14. Hell yeah MDMA is great, especially in a setting like this. Its an experience that everyone should have at least once. Can almost guarantee that you will experience infinity on it. The stuff awakened me.
  15. This journal is intended to be a place where I record my continued alignment into the vibration of love. I hope for this to be a further inspiration for myself, and all those reading to become the fully awakened, loving, grateful and disciplined human beings that you are. My spiritual practices thus far to open the Pineal Gland 30 minutes of meditation (This technique) An hour or two of sungazing OMAD Raw fruit and vegetable diet (With some fasts to come!) Distilled water (4 litres) 19 minutes of the Divine Headstand (Working my way up to 45 minutes ) Rebounding (20 minutes) + anticlockwise spinning (5 minutes ish) Practices to open the Heart Chakra Saying I love you in my head 24/7 (The most powerful practice is this one!) Searching for things in each moment that I appreciate, or that I'm grateful for (such as waking up that morning). I do this because I have a deep passion to teach people about spirituality in an understandable and simple way. I intend to be an inspiration to you all who read this journal, and secretly in everyday life to mirror your potential through my own. (If I can do it, you can do it!) I love you all so much just as you are <3 I'm grateful to be here of service.
  16. @SoonHei For me, an initial stage was to observe thoughts and realize I am not a thought. There is something aware of the thought. Yet, this awareness is no-thing. It is not any particular thing, so not a thing. My current stage is getting to know that awareness. Awakened beings I’ve listened to suggest the next stage is a realization that consciousness/awareness is everything. There is no separation. My mind likes to intellectualize it as a concept, yet I don’t experience it in my direct experience. I see me here and the table over there. I’ve found vision is overwhelmingly object-space oriented. However, I’ve found sound is MUCH weaker at this. For me, this has been a next step after I’ve had the witnessing of thoughts. The realization came with a bird chirp, yet works for any sound. One day while meditating, with my eyes closed, a thought arose in my mind and I obseved it. Then something else (a sound) arose in my mind and I observed it. Prior to giving either of them any meaning, I noticed both appearances were remarkably similar. Like *really* similiar. I saw how my brain was conditioned to define the appearance as a bird chirp that occurrd outside of my self. Yet in my direct experience, the appearance of the thought and chirp were both in awareness. There was no inside vs outside. When I let go and just observed the two appearances, it’s hard to observe differences. I need to *add* on meaning / identification to create the experience of relevance and separation. In a relative, personal world, thoughts about my career, life purpose, ethics etc will seem to have more relevance than a trivial bird chirp. Yet, if I really get down to their substance I sense something else. I can enter this space only with sounds and my eyes closed in meditation. Vision has a much deeper object - space orientation.
  17. @MrDmitriiV Everyone's path is different. Lots of people get awakened even without meditating much, practicing yoga, knowing about chakras, taking psychedelics, etc. Use other's teachings as suggestions, not requirements. I personally had the shift while self-inquiring guided by Leo in his Creating an Experience of No-self video and never had to do/try anything else after that.
  18. @Chrissy j I'm in the process of awakening. Based on how I resonate with awakened speakers, I'd say I've turned a corner and am at an immature stage of awakening. I'm at a stage where there is a sense of an "I am" that is free from, and aware of, all aspects of "the person". All feelings, thoughts, memories, the life story, opinions, beliefs, concepts etc. It is aware of all the conditioning my person has undergone. It is attached to none of it. This "I am" is totally neutral / empty and does not identify with "the person". It is no thing. However, the person keeps returning with various levels of identification. Sometimes there is nearly complete identification with the person, sometimes there is virtually no identification - and also everything in-between. I realized millions of years of evolution and a lifetime of non-stop social conditioning has created this person and it seems like it will take some time to recondition into my true nature. Recently, this "I am" has become aware of itself leading to an energetic shift. The seeking energy has dissolved. A new energy wanting to be the "I am" consciousness is emerging. There is a sense there the person can no longer return to how it was. A sense this "I am" will continue this process. I have found it's MUCH easier to de-identify with the person when the person is relaxed. Meditation, traditional yoga, kriya yoga etc. can help settle down the person and allow space. As well, psychology and personal development can help relax the person. Learning about why my person experiences anxiety, fear, jealousy etc. Observing how my character grasps at pleasure and avoids being uncomfortable. Learning how to sit and be still when my person is uncomfortable and wants to escape. All this promotes a more balanced, relaxed person, which allows for deeper revelations to appear.
  19. I don't know how many people awakened on this forum , or had a glimpse of enlightenment ... But where do you think reality takes place really ? Does it exist only when you perceive it , or is it existing even if no one is perceiving it ? for exemple, does a rock exist when no one is here to perceive it ? how do we define the reality of something , if that something isn't perceived or measured ?
  20. strangely so this is again a paradoxal showcase of how spirituality functions those who are more in non-duality tend to paradoxally over-identify with others your enlightenment is not another one's enlightenment guru's show the way but they are only guru's to those who are unawakened whats gonna happen when we're all awakened? we'll all be like buddha? nu-uh, life is infinity, it is more, not less you are completely unique now, what makes you think that attaining a higher vibration will make you more similar to anyone? enlightenment means higher vibration, even more unique then ever before your enlightenment has nothing to do with mine or any guru, that is what makes it so exciting and wonderful guru's only show the way to yourself, whats inside is yours to discover, and it seems like you have a divine vision over being enlightenment in a completely new way, thats awesome guru's are merely friends trying to point the way, they are not better buddha is not better, sadghuru is not better, not mooji not anyone else on this planet is better or worth more, only when we know that truth may we start listening to what is being said to help us
  21. Ive just had another moment of awareness, putting things into perspective. It feels like in daily life I am caught up in an pseudo-awakened alter ego and totally clouded, totally filled with concepts and beliefs, so clouded that it makes me depressed. An ego with stories around awakening, feelings and experiences that are clearly mind filtered. That is the default state of my mind. I begin doubting, feeling like I just pretend things happened a certain way when they actually were just mind-distorted so I could put them into words. I look at this self and it is so far away from reality. It makes me absurdly sad, very very sad looking how deep I fell. And yet I am still unconsciously always caught up in it. Pls take me out of it, this realization is very heartbreaking somehow. I have already had such realization where I cried because I realized how unconsciously deep I fell without even noticing it driving me to the point of thinking about suicide. This poor soul just didnt know it better because it got dragged away in the mind's stream of stories. That is probably the reason I have no clear sense of self - it is so clouded and manipulated by the mind.
  22. A lot of great insight and honest perspectives in this discussion. I think it's completely understandable for the OP to wonder -- what's the point of being enlightened? What's the big deal if someone has awakened to the illusion and realized that nothing was there to be awoken? The language used to describe enlightenment makes it seems like nothing really changes -- but the change is simply the realization -- and the realization itself has a snowball effect on every thought and belief that has shaped your entire subjective world. It changes how you relate to the world around you -- and most importantly, in my opinion, -- changes how you FEEL. You won't have the same heaviness, harsh emotions, and psychological baggage you used to carry. Hence, you become en-LIGHT-ened. Keep in mind, this is after a pretty extreme dismantling process of the falsehoods that come into light after the realization. Again, the language that's often used to describe enlightenment makes it seem like nothing changes at all or that there's nothing you can absolutely do -- that confuses people sometimes and leads them to question -- why even bother? As for psychadelics, it's obviously not a ticket to a permanent state of enlightenment, but it can be effective for giving you a glimpse of your true nature without the ego. Interestingly, if you read all the trip reports on Erowid, especially the bad ones lol, you'll notice that the user will come to a point where they lose the sense of themselves and don't even know who they are anymore. If they're not ready for it, they might freak out and call their mom or something along those lines lol. But if you have a notion that you'll experience your ego dissolving while on it, it can be very effective in recognizing what that's like -- so you can better discern the ego and the real you in your normal non-drugged state. - Omar | FreethinkingGuru.com
  23. This is a really significant post. In general, imo, a lot of people (forum wise) are ignoring the pyramid and trying to “be” Turqoise / Nondual / Enlightened, and it is causing a lot of unneeded stress and confusion. Living in your parents house and making arguments for your own ‘having awakened’ when you have yet to attain financial & emotional self reliance, for example. So there is a grosse lack of appreciation & humility in many cases, which detrimentally stunts personal growth by means of frustration. Or to put it simple, it’s like someone pretending they’re a millionaire online for so long that they never actually developed themselves by becoming a millionaire - or a sage, or enlightened, etc. Or someone pretending they are self actualized for so long they never accomplish holding down a job by being able to communicate and work with others effectively. Shadow work, imo, is the most underutilized & under-appreciated work. As if everyone just figures they can skip it. I suppose that’s an inherent challenge of the nature of ego. Or in the biggest picture, it’s like not doing much for yourself, your life, your happiness, because you’re “already” self actualized, having negated all the things you want in life by nullifying, but in actuality having fooled yourself. I wonder if this is an offset of having access to people who are self actualized..?
  24. around the time that I awakened was the time that I experienced the most thoughts, that moment when I really questioned who I am my thoughts were racing I felt I was going mad ever since being on the path of enlightenment, involving meditation and mindfulness in my daily life it would seem that there is more space where I do not think, where I am, this space has evolved to form a galactic ocean and it sometimes feels bigger then the story of my daily life paradoxically I'm realizing I have not been thinking less, on the contrary, never have I paid more attention to my thoughts ever since trying to enlighten, there has been more thoughts, more focus, but in the right direction its as if now I think in a lethal way, multi-threaded, synchronistically, constructs of thoughts, dimensions of thought thought has revealed itself for me to be as physical as throwing a punch a thought is energy, every thought, every projection in the past or the future, it is all so much energy it would seem that I am running out, coming to a stand stil, it takes so much energy to not be who you truly are a thought is a projection in another dimension, when you think you are not here, its like a quantum leap, this is how far we go in our seeking I'm at a point where I naturally go thoughtless at certain moments, actually for most of the day no matter how you seek enlightenment you will get there every effort, every thought, nothing is wasted, everything burns every direction leads to home, eventually the mask will break every single moment of seeking is going on endlessly, every moment of the past burning now, even those moments in the future, the plans you have already made, the efforts you are already doing in a mental dimension, months or years from now, those plans those projects, seeking there now its pure rocket fuel being blasted, in every direction, till there's nothing left, too tired, no will to seek anymore, and then one arrives
  25. Hi @Leo Gura I wanted to clarify some things and report on my progress. When I wrote my last post, the question wasn't implying the Enlightenment was just a hallucination. On the contrary, I recognize the reality of mystical awareness. I was trying to articulate the idea that subconscious programming and intention have us "tap into" a particular slice of reality. That slice of reality says, "Nothing is real. Everything is Nothing. There is no something". If you think of the awareness as a radio tuner, then what I was saying was that various mystical cultures only "tune" into a particular reality. Regardless, that's not what I really wanted to talk about today. For the past two years of my life, I've been highly resentful of people and of general culture because I thought people were devaluing the things that I loved. As a result, I wouldn't listen to people because I felt that it was a way to take me away from those very same things. It's only now that I realize that people were just trying to help me grow up and become more mature as a person. I've already talked about the value that I hold dearly for intellectual life and philosophy. It's the bold effort to secure for human knowledge the satisfaction of piercing into the Mysteries. Thrice that though, is the recognition of the beauty of the elevation of our consciousness through the human imagination. The imagination... ferment to great visions, and the enthralling beauty of that peculiar understanding host only to the play of ideas. I want to give more context... when I talk about this, I don't want to present the image of a very cold person, who only understands logic as symbols. It all started in my literature class. Something awakened in me as I allowed myself to get lost the daydreams of characters, romantic images of wilderness and the gentle passing of time set against what seemed to be paintings in the imagination. The rest is merely the attempt to envision truth, knowing that it is beautiful when put together. No, envisioning the wider reality of the world, knowing that understanding is sublime. What can be the practical value of pure theory seen from this standpoint? I have felt at times as though I have placed myself into a victim complex. I've felt as though I've had to defend my own enjoyment of this. Is this all perverse enjoyment? Or something....noble? More specifically, I have put myself into the mindset as though I was being deprived of the right to love such things if I couldn't see it being shared by other people. It's only now that I realize that the element that I was missing was Self-Love. The rest is my own history. I left Actualized.org because I didn't feel satisfied by this form of spirituality. I wanted to bring to my own attention something... greater. Something able to fulfill my thirst for knowledge. I found the Left Hand Path. I found Magick. I found the Occult. I called to it, it came to me and I came to it. The rest of my development is something I will keep personal, because I don't want to distract this with a discussion on Magick or the Occult. However, I had to mature. I had to grow up. I had to start learn how to take responsibility for my own life. On many levels I am trying to develop myself. I'm looking to develop myself as an entrepreneur. I'm looking to develop myself as a magician. I'm looking to develop myself as a philosopher. I'm looking to develop myself as an intellectual. I'm looking to self-actualize and obtain emotional mastery, and after all this time, I am finally dipping my toes back into Enlightenment practices because I realize something. I realize that if I really wanted to become a true magician, I have to absorb any and every form of knowledge to further my ascent. Yes, that includes the Mystical paradigm as well. I cannot afford to leave it on the table, and yes, technically speaking it's not "knowledge". But the most pressing matter is to develop Wisdom. All kinds of Wisdom, all kinds of mastery from many different people. Life wisdom though, that has been particularly uncomfortable. Leo, I've fallen into the trap of taking my life purpose too seriously. In taking life too seriously, I deprive myself of self-love. I deprive myself of the enjoyment, the pure magic of the things I have passion for. Now, when I think about them in my mind, I feel a contraction in my solar plexus and a raw heat within my chest. I'm also afraid of other people. I'm afraid that I will be criticized and that it will shock me to my core. It's when I begin to look up to all of these masters and people in different areas, I'm realizing all the bullshit I have to clear up in my own life. When I see how you post lately, I see that you've been turning into a wolf, and I don't blame you. I can't blame you. It's the feeling you get when you just feel.... bad, and your heart sinks. Yet, you are slightly terrified. That's where I need advice on self-love. It's not that I don't have confidence necessarily, it's that I feel drained and tired sometimes. It feels like I have to slog it out. I muster my strength to push through, but I only create more internal resistance. I realize that I have to rely on myself to feel loved and cared for, because I can't always control how other people feel. I try to allow myself to enjoy things. Sometimes I just run my hands over the leather of my seat, or I lose myself int the present moment and realize that I am an emptiness devoid of anything. Not staring at anything, but always there. I can't stare at it. I AM it. Leo, I don't have any hard feelings against the forum. I've been curbing my arrogance because finding flaws in others is cheap, understanding is gold.