Commodent

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About Commodent

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    Norway
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  1. I think that high-consciousness music is generally characterized by immense beauty, warmth and reverence. Some of my personal candidates:
  2. @Farnaby It is not just insecurity, though. Could be anger, sadness, grief, embarrassment, whatever. Like a situation where someone is angry but people are just okay with it, find it funny even, because they recognize he is coming from a place of acceptance. There is an added layer of perspective to his anger, you know? What matters isn't necessarily what you're feeling, but rather your attitude to it. In fact, when you express your dark side from a place of love people often find it intensely relieving and will usually burst out laughing, as it transmits the message that it is okay for them to have these feelings and that they don't need to have their straitjacket on around you. Stand-up comedians are masters at this. Yesterday I was at an event where the hosts wanted us to gather in a circle around them. Since we were at a cafeteria there were tables and chairs in our presence, but the hosts gave us no instruction on whether we were to sit or stand, so some people would be standing awkwardly while others were sitting. At that moment I was insecure, as there was no clear information of what they expected us to do. But at the same time I wasn't really insecure, because I am not ashamed of that feeling. In fact, the insecurity of the crowd is useful information to the hosts and a sign they should probably exert more control. So there is really no need to demonize insecurity.
  3. @Farnaby Yes, and those physical sensations are not you either. Only a part of you. Have you ever noticed someone who might seem very insecure in their body language, and yet they seem perfectly fine with it? That's because they are grounded in their whole self. Now, contrast that with someone who is full of inner conflict and overly identify with that insecure part of themselves.
  4. Yes, and in my case the self-criticism often isn't even verbal, so it can be quite hard to become conscious of. I think the biggest challenge is really to not get sucked into that self-critical perspective when such thoughts arise. It's okay to have self-critical feelings and thoughts, but the second you start identifying with it you are not being yourself. I think the first step to letting go is in fact accepting that those feelings are there and not trying to change them, as that will only exasperate the inner conflict. Observe, and recognize your true being beyond these parts. They can't hurt you. This video series is a great introduction to IFS, which is super effective at dealing inner conflict (because it helps you get in touch with your true self): It has really been immensely helpful to me.
  5. Yes, it's easy to get sucked into it if I'm not cautious, particularly in situations where it is important for me to make a good impression. I really thought I had gotten over it but recently I did a couple of live stream interviews, and then it hit me HARD. Because the knowledge that people all over the world could be watching it and that it would be stored on the Internet forever put some serious pressure on my end to make myself look good. The self-criticism really destabilised me for weeks afterwards. So I definitely think it is journey. But over time as you stop doing it and it becomes less and less frequent, and only occur in rare situations like the ones I mentioned. It's literally a habit you have to forget. And you don't forget things by thinking about it.
  6. @aklacor727 Yeah, the degree of embodiment doesn't matter. What matters is its importance to you.
  7. Yes, he says you shouldn't worry about whether you're fully aligned with them yet. As long as it is authentic.
  8. Notice and talk to the different parts within you like you would talk to a small child or a loved one. This is really the best method I have found, as it really evokes a sense of compassion for yourself. https://ifs-institute.com/resources/articles/evolution-internal-family-systems-model-dr-richard-schwartz-ph-d
  9. As a person who suffered from chronic depression for over a decade and several bouts of double-depression I can confidently dis-confirm this. Ultimately, the ability to be there for myself was the only thing that worked, and the resources I mentioned was such a game-changer for me. Most other self-help resources out there, however, were not healing. Quite the opposite, really. It's great that you found something that works for you. It does however seem to me that your dependency on psychotherapy is covering some feeling of lack, judging by how fiercely you are defending it. I could be wrong, but the times I have acted the way you do it has usually been when I was defending some ideology that provided me some false sense of comfort and security at the time. But such clinging to beliefs does in fact make you less secure and stable in the long run, because it's rooted in a lie. Disagree with the details all you want, that is not what I care about. I am simply making a case for the abundance that is always present within you. If a psychotherapist helps you get in touch with that (instead of serving as a substitute), that's very good. But it's an utter lie that that's the only way.
  10. Have you found a good way to deal with throat blockages? I feel like tensions in my throat area are what constantly fucks me over, and it's something that has been really persistent throughout my life.
  11. By creating habits you direct the flow. You are not just a person responding to external stimuli, you are also the one shaping it. With total adaptability you will be just like a leaf in the wind, always shifting and with no self-agency. Adapting and organizing is something that needs to be balanced. It's not either/or. Exerting effort does not make one suffer, and neither does doing what is difficult. What makes one suffer is one's resistance to it. The unwillingness to actually do it. Allowing yourself to exert effort and to do the difficult brings freedom in so many ways. Note that this does not mean you have to act like a tyrant and oppress certain parts of yourself. Be more like the kind leader that sees value in all members of its crew. "To prefer chocolate, one does not have to hate and vilify vanilla."
  12. In my view, this is a good thing. It's an invitation to find your inner authority.
  13. I would also suggest you to trying out an elimination diet: https://www.fammed.wisc.edu/files/webfm-uploads/documents/outreach/im/handout_elimination_diet_patient.pdf Cutting out gluten and in general just eating more vegetables has radically improved my brain fog. You generally want to avoid inflammatory food, so go organic if you can afford it.
  14. You do not stop it, you embrace the darkness. Allow it, and get to know it really well. Then it loses its hooks on you.
  15. How about connecting with other people? You didn't mention that in your post.