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About Vercingetorix

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  • Birthday 04/28/1987

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  1. what about moments in time that I have a memory of? would you classify them as the same imagination category of birth and death? because if memory can be trusted then it makes sense to think that the body will die, which is a death in a sense.
  2. @Emerald What you are saying just contradict my experience. It's clear to me that If you approach a girl in the right way - It will be a positive experience for her almost always. And why not? It's something very positive to approach a girl. you assuming that If I approach you it means I approach every girl I see Is not correct. If you are an available girl, being approached is something you should appreciate immensely, because you would not approach won't you? maybe most men use cold approaches just to get laid, they approach every woman they see, and they don't know how to approach nicely. But it doesn't mean approaching can't be done consciously and beautifully.
  3. @Emerald are you the average woman? the way you react is not necessarily how most women react. My experience is that when I'm in the right energy or "state", most women will respond very positively to a Sincere compliment. It's because of the energy and the value I give. But there are definitely more effective ways to approach. if you want to understand it better you can watch this:
  4. Enjoyed your book reviews a lot!
  5. was excited to remind you to see them as threshold guardians, as a test: "do I want it bad enough?" but I see that I got beaten to it Another point to consider: Is it clear to you that someone else that would be in your exact place won't care at all? that the emotional reaction is totally yours? (and as you say the PMS made it much stronger). If you are willing to accept that you are responsible for these emotions, then you can ask yourself why am I reacting that way? why do I care so much? what situation in the past created this defence mechanism? (you mentioned being bullied). there are also techniques to go back to traumatic memories and change them, those can be really powerful with releasing the emotional blockages. it can be helpful to see emotions that rile up as something positive. I tell myself when emotional things are surfacing "oh wonderful these are emotions that are stuck in my body, in my subconscious, and this is an opportunity for me to observe them and experience them, it will help me release these emotions from my body and free energy from my subconscious, so it's a great opportunity, it's a purification process that will make me a better and happier person" - this helps me to lower the resistance to those emotional states and even be happy to face them. (Vipassana meditation) Another thing that I would try to do, Is to explain to the trolls how it makes me feel. I assume that they quite miserable people if they get to a point that they need to troll someone, so you can just tell them something like "it hurts me when you write this comment, I don't understand why you write it, could you please stop?" "could you tell me why you are trolling me?" maybe those are people that got hurt in the past by you? I would try to conduct a dialogue with them. show them compassion. I guess it could also make things worst but I would try it.
  6. I see that I kinda stop pursuing spirituality - Meditation, trips. As in my trips, I encountered some truths that weren't much to my liking. I didn't find Nirvana at the end of the road, I encountered things that felt true but weren't too special - like oh right now I remember, everything is clear, there is nothing else to understand, let's go back to life and enjoy. So you don't really feel motivated to face this truth as I experienced that there is nothing to really see. Another thing is this fear that I have, I think from childhood I adopted this belief that no matter how much I wished for a "happy ending" like in the stories, I don't really believe they exist. Like deep down, I "know" that I won't find what I seek - peace, redemption, love. I see that in my life, as much as everytime a new hope and dream for something good - relationship, love, success in things, at the end it doesn't work out and I return back to zero. (of course that logically I do see that I progress but emotionally it always feels the same). So emotional It's hard for me to believe in a positive truth to find in spirituality. what can I do? maybe self inquire about what is good? what is an end? what is the truth?
  7. well if girls and dating is a sticking point for you, you will face fears and develop yourself massively from it. I'm into it right now.
  8. @Leo Gura thanks leo @Dodo thanks Dodo and please come back Thanks guys, love you all 💗💗
  9. @Dodo @MarkusSweden why is it madness? do you think Leo is mad? maybe you are stuck in the materialist paradigm? I would like to point out that for me, it's a serious issue. of course, it's ok to joke about it sure, but I don't feel that you help me by only calling it madness or posting comics... @Malelekakis what do you mean that I do not exist? as an ego\body? if so I agree, it is also my experience. but if you mean that I don't exist even as the witness\ consciousness I do not have such experiences. my experience is that I can exist "alone" as consciousness. how do you know it has a good ending (after death?) I agree that in this life I can find happiness and bliss by being present in the now, but I don't think it's wise to neglect what happens after.
  10. @Dodo why is it so? talking from experience? Ultimately my intuition agrees with you, but I can't ignore what I experience and what Leo is saying. maybe it's just a passing phase that I have to surrender to and accept, and beyond it, I'll find something else. The beauty of it is that it makes me appreciate what I have here - other people, feeling connected, much more.
  11. My motivation for spiritual growth has dwindled in the last 6 months. I work and see a lot of progress in the outer world - with girls and pick up, with my self-esteem, with emotions mastery, communication - I have high levels of motivation for this stuff. But not so much for anything "beyond". I barely meditate, barely practice yoga, and do not engage so much in spiritual knowledge and practice. Although my highest values are freedom, truth and love, I see that I am in kind of a fear to pursue truth. the reason is, that I feel as I have glimpsed the truth, and "didn't like" what I've seen ( in my 3 ayahuasca sessions, I will attend another session in a few days) My fear is similar to what is described in the recent topic about solipsism here (for some time I wanted to ask Leo about this topic but his reply in this thread "confirmed" my suspicions about it, I had a very strong surge of fear and loneliness when I read his reply). In a way, it's a stupid topic to discuss with "others". because even just trying to explain to you people the topic forces me to be under the "others exist" illusion. writing here to you guys I have to assume that you exist and I can gain value from discussing with you, that even If "I" alone exist, "you" do seem to experience the same stuff and can help me. I can't wrap my head around it. If I knew for sure that I alone exist my course of action in my life will be different than if others exist. (will be more focused on me than on others). also If I act as if I alone exist people may think that I am mad and even if it's true it's seems something that I have to hide to an extent. So I feel like I am kinda stuck. that If I alone exist I can't really trust others reports about spiritual experiences, only my own, and so far for me, it seems to reveal an uncomfortable truth about me being alone, and not stuff like unconditional love, total bliss... Always when I came back from my psychedelic experiences I was very happy, but only because I returned to safety, to a place where others exist and I'm not alone. I'm so happy to return to the "worldly illusion". So why should I pursue this path? why not enjoy this illusion while it lasts? it's not so bad here after all. On the other hand, I read and hear about all the progress and experiences people are having with spirituality and "envy" them, and for most things, It seems that others experiences can be trusted and mirror mine. but again, when the "truth" of solipsism really hits me, and I surrender to it fully, I really accept that I'm alone, it seems that every piece of knowledge from others collapse, that I can't trust Leo experiences or any others, I feel truly alone. And then I'm afraid because I feel that I am groping in the dark, in the unknown, and what little I have in my life I may lose so I better stick to it. another point, Is that I can't fathom how to talk to others about this topic ( as you can see here...) how can I address this Issue? it's A fucking paradox. If my experience is that "only I exist" and my experience so far in life is that even if others don't exist it seems as they exist "like me" so I have to address anyone else as if he alone exist If I want him to understand me. and this forces me to see the world as if "others exist". I want so deeply to believe that ultimately at the end all there is is unfinite love, that the story of life has a "good ending", but I fear it is not so, That ultimately I'm here alone, responsible to all that is happening, trapped here... edit: Just watched Leo's solo retreat part 2 from 26:50, And it's almost exactly my experience and conclusions.
  12. it's amazing and I share this with you. The question is this an ego-mechanism for creating a duality - unlimited love for animals and nature, but hate for humans? is there a boundary somewhere? For me, the next level is to feel the same love for animals I have an inner aversion towards, like spiders (spiderbro ), Cockroaches, mosquitos, flies, worms...and for humans even when they do things that hurt my ego. can I feel love and compassion to someone who is hurting an animal that I love? (while hopefully stopping it if I can?)
  13. Its very important to be able the express yourself. The Feynman technique - expaim yourself as if you talk to a 5 year old, very simply. if you can't you probably don't really understand it. How is your confindance?