aurum

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Posts posted by aurum

  3. Posted

    37 minutes ago, Gesundheit2 said:

    I am traumatized.

    Oh I know.

    Your posts I’ve seen in the other subforums are often insightful. But when it comes to dating, your posts often miss. This is clearly a sore spot for you.

    And no shade by the way. I recognize it because I recognize it in myself.

    40 minutes ago, Gesundheit2 said:

    Heal me or shut up.

    Happy to work with you if you want.

    39 minutes ago, Vzdoh said:

    ????????????

    Oh good! I am not the only one who thought oh shit! The dude does not feel anything and self justifies to himself that this is OK ???

    It’s a really common pattern for guys. Traumatic past experiences -> learn to not feel your emotions -> become emotionally repressed adult.

  4. Posted

    4 hours ago, Gesundheit2 said:

    @Vzdoh The thing is that intimacy is 100% imaginary.

    Consider this; a human can form an intimate relationship with an animal, or even with inanimate objects. For example, one can intimately love their job, or coffee, or a tree, or anything else. Does that mean that the objects are reciprocating? Of course not. It's all in our heads. And really, intimacy is just another word for attachment or neediness.

    And btw, I wasn't talking about emotional unavailability. I, as a man, don't resonate with intimacy like women do. I used to, but not anymore. So, I can be available for the girl if I want to, it's all an act after all, but I won't be feeling anything. My experience will be devoid of any emotions. At the same time, she will be feeling all sorts of emotions with me, and when she's alone she will be fantasizing about how I make her feel. Little does she know, but why wake her up and ruin everything?

    Yup, no trauma at all in these statements. Sounds totally healthy.

  6. Posted

    19 hours ago, samijiben said:

    Tom MacDonald (some rapper dude, if you didn't know) just released a new song. I personally find it quite ridiculous on a magnitude of great girth. He spews common conspiracy theories and talks about how he is awake and all of this while he is really no different from the imaginary robots his "message" attacks. I think this epitomizes new-age crap; the muckiest of shit; the worst information that could possibly be fed to helpless young suggestible minds. 

    On the other hand, maybe he is conveying a profound "wake-up" message and I am just an unwitting robot. Check it out guys, and tell me what you think.

    Here it is:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zCBNwGHPZ2M&t=0s&ab_channel=TomMacDonald

    Oh god this was pure cringe.

    Everyone wants to be woke these days. I pity anyone who took this seriously.

  7. Posted

    8 hours ago, LiberatedMonkey said:

    I was thinking that I could major in computer science in order to build a website for myself with my purpose in mind and have job security by having this degree if things don’t go well.

    You don’t need a CS degree for this man. Websites are just getting easier and easier to create these days.

    1 hour ago, LiberatedMonkey said:

    However, I still feel a ton of emotional turmoil, like a burning hole in my stomach because of the choice I got to make between both majors.

    Feel and introspect on this emotion. What are you afraid of? What will happen if you make the wrong choice? Can you make a wrong choice?

    Get very specific.

    To your dilemma, it sounds to me like you should stick with engineering. But the reality is this decision is likely not nearly as significant as you feel it may be. You could graduate with an engineering degree at 21 and then decide to spend the next decade of your life becoming a poet. And you’d only still be 30.

    You simply don’t have to have all the answers at this point. 

    It can be overwhelming having this many choices as far as what you should do with your career. So don’t get sucked into that if you can.

  8. Posted

    @Waves

    I also grew up with significant economic privilege. I think you're not in as bad of a place as you think you are. The reality is that the majority of people in society feel the way you feel, regardless of how they grew up financially.

    Yes, there may be some motivation towards action if you grew up poor in order to experience the opposite. But then what? That won't last forever. At some point, you have to go beyond being motivated purely by money anyway.

    It also assumes that making money is what motivates us in the first place. Obviously there's some truth to this, in that money is directly linked to our survival in modern society, thus obtaining it can be motivating. But what are we really talking about? Some pieces of paper? Digits in a computer?

    Money is made up. It can't possibly be your driving motivating force for life because it's not real. There's nothing there.

    41 minutes ago, Waves said:

    hese are some of the answers I thought of:

    • Come up with an inspiring vision for my life (it's been in the makings for years, still struggling to connect with what I tangibly want)
    • Connect with survival, master being an Achiever
    • Deliberately challenge yourself and face your fears
    • Be more observant and empathetic, zoom out of your limited perspective
    • Develop gratitude and appreciation
    • Contemplate your own death, become aware of the trajectory you're on
    • Study passionate people and bring more uplifting people into your life
    • Be more of a giver, be more of service, instead of constantly taking

    These are all good things in general. I'd really recommend them to anyone.

    Some other ideas that maybe useful:

    • Travel to 3rd world countries and experience poverty there
    • Decide to limit your expenses to only the minimum wage for a period of time
    • Spend some time in the Peace Corps

    All in all, realize your financial privilege is not a debilitation. Oh, you mean you're not motivated to participate in wage slavery? Color me shocked.

    I think your lack of motivation has far more to do with society itself than your specific financial condition.

    But you will have to explore. You will have to discover what you care about. So I'd use your situation to immerse yourself in as many experiences that seem interesting to you as possible.

  10. Posted

    @Shiva99 @Swarnim

    I think there's a couple of tiers of solutions:

    Tier 1: Shut up, grit your teeth and just discipline yourself to not do it anymore. The problem with this one of course is that it doesn't solve root cause, requires a lot of willpower and can be neurotic.

    Tier 2: Embrace it. I'd stay from porn, but you can turn masturbation into a conscious activity. Set a time to do it, slow it down, and treat it almost like a meditation where you're focusing on every sensation. You could also look up solo Tantric activities.

    Tier 3: Get a partner. This is the best option IMO and is how most people deal with this. But it may not be in the cards for you at the moment.

  11. Posted

    @Late Boomer

    What is the alternative?

    For me, once I understood that this is what I wanted my life to be about, just going back to simply meeting my survival needs seemed absurd.

    I'm not saying every option in the world is still available to you at 56. It's not, and that's okay. You don't need or even want every option available.

    There is never a time where you can't find something that is meaningful to YOU to do with your life. Following your highest excitement is available to you always.

    It might not make you millions dollars, but this ain't the "make millions of dollars" forum.

    The fact that you're feeling a bit confused and even lost can be a good sign. That's the first step to finding something new. We have to get lost first from whatever we were doing before.

  13. Posted

    10 hours ago, SS10 said:

    how do I go about transitioning into one field, and synthesising all my experience, degree, knowledge into one career?

     

    No one here can give you that answer. That’s the point. A life purpose doesn’t come in a box, it’s uniquely chosen and created by you. That point may seem trite but it’s significant. It means you have to be truly creative and a lot more “unknown” factor involved.

    Don’t expect too much too fast either. I’m approaching 30 and have been doing this work for years. Only now do I really feel like I’m starting to zero in on my LP. Everything else was just preparation. It might take you even longer.

    That said, there is of course guidance that can be given. At 21 I’d say you’re definitely on a good course. You’ve got a decent job that will handle your survival needs, but you’ve also found Actualized.org and therefore understand there can be so much more. And you’re already studying to make that happen.

    My advice to you then would be to just keep following what excites you. Experiment a lot. What do you WANT your career / LP to look like? What matters to you? What do you care about? Those are the more important questions.

  14. Posted

    2 hours ago, Esilda said:

    @Vrubel why do men game? As a woman it just seems so alien to me.... O.o

    Is it purely to have sex with women? Like, that's the only end game, just to fuck? And then... they've what, one some biological game?

     

    I think the actual sex is only part of it.

    For a lot of us guys, there is a big aspect of validation that can come into it. If you “successfully” pick up a lot of girls, you feel better about yourself. Because that is what is cool and shows you are a desirable man.

    I remember even back in middle school, it was the guys who were “good with girls” who were respected by other guys and seemed to have the most friends. If girls didn’t like you and didn’t want to hook up with you, then you were a loser and labeled as such. And then through high school and college that only escalated.

    I’m not saying that’s a healthy way of thinking. But it is a pattern I’ve observed.

  15. Posted

    51 minutes ago, Noahsteelers34 said:

    I believe I know way more than I do, I'm a know it all when really I have no life experience and no solid plan.

    Sounds like you and your parents had some additional conversations. Are these their words?

    Regardless, I think going to college will not be such a bad option. It will give you time to explore and develop yourself. You’ll have fun. And yes you’ll have debt, but if you’re smart you can minimize the damage.

    I would really consider this not “college” but four years to discover and start working on your LP. Whether it’s engineering or something else, I wouldn’t just think about it as a stepping stone to a job. Think bigger about the whole thing. You have time and you’re not gonna starve. So be strategic.

    You may not nail down every detail of your LP by the time you graduate, but you can make significant progress if you take it seriously.

    Your other plan about moving to Miami was dubious. Not saying you couldn’t pull it off, and it’s good that you’re willing to eat shit for your dreams. I lived in Miami for several years doing something similar. But it is a brutal path. College will be gentler.

  16. Posted · Edited by aurum

    2 hours ago, Schahin said:

    Hello dear people, 

     

    I would like to know if somebody knows of rituals that enables someone to contact angelic beings or light beings of the spiritual realm? 

    I hear alot about these kinds of rituals, even about the communication to dragons. And that angels and beings of entities of light exist we also know that I presuppose. 

    My Purpose is to establish communication, to learn and receive wisdom and understanding and heal myself and other people in my family, Also because I have completely gone away from psychedelics for now because of the fear that something could go wrong. Sometimes I had that feeling during the trips. My focus is on meditation, fasting and solo rituals, as I don't know about anybody nearby that knows something about Rituals. 

    Greetings

     

    In my experience, you don’t necessarily need any ritual to talk to the angels or any other guides. Just talk. You can literally just think a thought right now and they will hear you. Or you could speak out loud if you want.

    This is how the best channels I know do it. It’s just very normal and conversational.

    More important is learning to listen to them.

    If you still want a ritual, that’s fine. Rituals can be powerful tools for the mind. I’d create one that has personal significance for you. Something that makes you feel tuned in, relaxed and in a state of receptivity.

  18. Posted

    2 hours ago, GrandeOrso said:

    What do you people think about travelling as a way to grow? I'm 26 and very undecided, I wish to do good and I have a desire to see and discover. 

    I did travel for 1 year and met people that did it for a decade, or maybe 3-4-5-6 years in a row, working odd jobs or being digital nomads. Do you think those are years well spent? 

    I honestly can't conceive of a better way to spend time, since I don't know what I want to master. It's the exploraration process at its finest

    I'm interested in your thoughts

     

     

     

    Traveling is good, but in my experience you will eventually hit diminishing returns in terms of growth. You’ll most likely want to settle some where and plant roots.

    The plus is that traveling can expose you to new experience to help you find out what your interests are. So if you feel you just lack experience, this is a good choice.

    The negative is that traveling won’t really let you commit to anything too deeply. And all the new options you are presented with can actually become overwhelming. So be aware of that. 

  19. Posted

    1 hour ago, diamondpenguin said:

    Huge fucking coffee fan, I drink 3 coffees a day, and review all the coffees from the world. It's not about money, it's about bringing people together and giving them the best coffees from around the world. @aurum

    Then I’d say go for it. I don’t know anything about the coffee business but I’m sure you can carve out some kind of niche.

  20. Posted

    5 hours ago, diamondpenguin said:

    Hey everyone, I have a big goal to start a coffee stand, I figured if we could get 7 customers an hour, we could earn a million dollars in three years, that being I work 7 days a week there. The thing is it would cost 100 grand to start a brick and mortar store. 25k to start a roadside store. How would you start a coffee stand?

    Seems like a risky business. What is your reason, besides money, to open a coffee stand? Do you just love coffee?

  21. Posted

    3 hours ago, KaRzual said:

    @hamedsf A chocolate blowjob! I haven't heard about this one. Does it include putting your dick into nutella or some kind of chocolate cream? If so - tested with my first gf. It wasn't that pleasurable at all.

    Btw she (my first gf) was the one that pushed for some new things, like giving me a bj with ice cubes in her mouth and i was like - yeah pretty cool, but i like the classical bj more. 

    A caveat to everything I’m about to say: my longest romantic relationship has only lasted a couple of years. So I could be talking out of my ass.

    But in my experience, these sort of novelty experiences don’t have staying power.

    It’s maybe a bit exciting for how ever long it’s exciting. Then it’s gone, and you’re onto the next novelty kick.

    Which is not to say you can’t do it. But I think that if you really want to keep things going, you need something deeper than a chocolate dick.

    What really seems to work is moving into higher consciousness forms of love. That’s a love that isn’t driven by novelty. 

    You may want to research tantric love practices. 

  22. Posted

    @Dumuzzi

    Interesting post, very thorough.

    We don’t talk much about deities / light beings on this forum. I suspect the discussion will only really kick up if Leo makes a video about it. But it’s definitely a topic I’m fascinated by.

    From the non-dual perspective, even higher dimensional light beings / deities are YOU. But from the world of relativity, they’re quite unique and intriguing. Especially if you grew up believing such beings did not exist.

  23. Posted

    6 hours ago, assx95 said:

    She told me she decided to drop out of college soon. What a shocker. It's like a punch in the face. I wouldn't wait next time to make a move on someone I like. And I would be assertive and get rejected instead. 

     

    Didn’t you say you went on a date with her? How did she not possibly know you were interested?

    Unless it wasn’t really a date. More like just friends hanging out. 

    I am actually very pro just being friends with girls, but not knowing how to assert your needs can be problematic.

  24. Posted

    3 hours ago, Don Wei said:

    @aurum that's true I still have no idea how I can make any money with my life purpose at the moment, longterm it pays off a lot, but I decided to enter a part-time job so I can survive a little.

    I hate working for people in such a setting a lot more than I thought I would.

    I mean looking from the outside I thought it wasn't gonna take much effort because it's just some low paying part time job, but when you're working it feels like you have to put your soul into it, and the higher ups are never happy with anything less than that, even though it's a part time job and I get paid almost nothing.

    I can't imagine that so many people work like this their entire life, this is literally hell. No wonder Leo calls it slave work, I actually feel like one.

     

    Oh yeah, this is relatable.

    I've taken a bunch of these bullshit, part time jobs to pay the bills.

    I remember I tried driving Uber once. Didn't last more than a couple of days. I can't even fathom how people do that full time for many years.

    The reality is this is how our economic system is set up. People don't participate in wage slavery for the fun of it, they do it because they have to.

    Those experiences gave me a lot more appreciation for everyday, "regular" working people. As well as more egalitarian, politically progressive policies.

    My advice would be to just slug it out as best you can. Yes, it's going to suck. Just put your head down, do your work the best you can, and then go home and focus on your passion projects.

  25. Posted

    1 hour ago, WaterDroplet--00 said:

    I have done some different kinds of breathwork on and off over the past couple of years, is there anything technique wise that you would recommend?

    I’ve also tried a bunch. I can’t really say which the best one, they all seem good to me. And of course every teacher says their breathwork practice is the best.

    I’d say find one that you’ll be consistent with and resonates with you. That’s likely the most important factor.