Posts posted by ActualizedDavid
I'm just finished College (Computer Programming )
I used to have 2 YouTube channels that made some money.
Now i have at home a electronics repair shop. That i work when i want. And 80% i sell online. and i import phone accessories from china and sell it in my country.
I do Music Video's for free atm.
At the same time my Uncle Repairs Refrigerators and home electronics. And i help him sell Freon ( That thing that make's your car cold and your Refrigerator cold ) and with this i make an extra buck.
14 hours ago, Stenne said:
@M4sti cold showers go in the fear. Breathe in the fear
+1 cold showers
I'm 1.5 years in cold showers sometimes 2 time a day.
For me personally is one of the most important things in my day. And help alot with self-esteem, fears and calming you mind.
Take a normal shower and clean yourself normally . Then at the end of the shower do cold wather .
Start with 10 seconds. And in a month go up to 1 minute. Then 2-3....
Them after 3-4 mounts you want fell any cold water anymore. You will kinda enjoy it !
36 minutes ago, Vinnie said:
@Nahm Seriously man, grow up.
I think he is talking about grounding yourself on what you experience directly and put it intro words. That it helps you fine the truth for yourself... Not taking someone word for it..
On 5/2/2019 at 8:31 PM, Major Tom said:
My sense of self was split into many and I was sure I heard the what was suppose to be the devil himself speak to me. He said I would regret enlightenment. He made believe enlightenment = awakening = hell, that it was a trap. And so before I could go higher I stopped myself. It was just too much. Had I not stopped it I would have gone insane.
I had some kind of this experience.
Is not real . It will pass . Look at your hands. And ask yourself what is real ? For sure ? 100%? That's what i did and it started to pass.
Do not beat yourself up thinking that you are going insane...
I undertand . Thanks alot for the help !
Look what i found.
I'm new in this things . I had some geniune experience s that change my whloe mind. In the better. Better with people , better with myself , money, life in general.
But i think im not developet enough . Is too much for me. And i need to let this non dual stuff away for a moment...
I will go . Thx you !
I'm happy that i started this topic.
You guys like to brake people's bubbles.thx you !
I'm need to spend more time alone and create a life that i love. With activities and people that insipre me.
8 hours ago, Good-boy said:
@ActualizedDavid do you hear other people talking to you when no one is around?
No. I do not hear voice's. Here is the ideea.
I go to a therapist ( a christian therapist )
And in the last year i had some enlightened experience's and 3 of them where in the therapist office and he asked me if i wanna join some Christianity cult or something . And I refused. I just want the therapy.
After that the therapist told me that a person sees god as they are raised. I do no understand what that means.
And then the therapist gived me a book about a person who is paranoid and is hearing voices.
I'm paranoid , sometimes i think people talk about me behind my back , sometimes i tink someone is fallowing me.sometimes i blame myself for stupid things. (The ideea is that i know that i'm creating this )
How to you know if you hear voice's?
I talk with myself alot. And i like to finish conversation that i had in the day that i do not finished. And i spend a lot of time alone.
Is this counting as talking with the voices ?
I'm schizophrenic ?
Can you guys show me some good sources .
Paranoic i'm for sure. In general, but usually i realize it. but i wanna learn more about this illness . And if i have other simtoms.
Some good sources ..
How can i self diagnosed to know if i'm schizophrenic ?
I don't know , i know that if i try to control the future. I'm trying the impossible
Not that i should not want some things or some circumstances . But trying to live There.
Yeah . If you reziste it . More suffering cames. Just be the observer and do things from there. At least that is what i experience.
I just want to do what i enjoy . Without thinking that is my purpose.
What i enjoy can change. I want to flow with life.
What do you think about this ?
Can i get some books that explains the paranormal ?
What do you think is the meening of this song?
What s you opinion on what this guy saying?
Ps: i know is a little bit off.
@ajasatya I'm gonna love myself more and more . So i can accept love in my life !
@Markus yes Markus ! Thx you for the wonderful explaing .
I will not say any but this , but that !
I will try to find the woonds and accepte them and let them heal.
When i will start to beat myself up, and not give myself compassion and understanding . I will came here and read your comments !!
Thx you Nahm , thx you ! I love you ! I like the feeling that your comment give me.
Ok. I was not raised with a lot of love. And my association at love is fear.
No,no,no, I'm not going there. ( That's my reaction )
I have a good attitude in life and i'm mostly present, but when intymate relationship.s came.... Hmmm . I can realize that i'm creating the fear. And the situation. But is not enough.
Most of the time when i bring this subject up ( like now ) i have a strong feeling in the center of my chest . A pressure.
I have a deep sense of that i do not deserve to be loved.
When i'm with a woman . If she is not having this fear of intimacy and she can talk about intimacy stuff. I simply return the survivel mechanism and fear cames out. I feel afraid, i feel not good enough for her.
My parents give me conditional love. On things. On action.s .etc So i know where this is coming from.
Hope you who been thru this can give me something to read or to watch,an idea or two,some exercises to do. So i can love myself and let be vurnerable.
Thx you !
in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
Posted · Edited by ActualizedDavid
Can i get some opinions on this Author ?
His books are worth ridding ?