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About electroBeam

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  1. I've just realized this attitude has lead to deep exhaustion to the point where I'm getting rashes all over my body. I guess theres 2 sides to every coin
  2. Or maybe trying to become deeply conscious, instead of enjoying the game, is just a spiritual rebranded form of the hedonic treadmill
  3. Forestluv already commented on the relative truth behind spiritual talent but i wanted to comment more on a sociological level. I totally get the feeling good aspect of spiritual talent. Spiritual talent might make some feel like they are better then others on an egoic level which is obviously a problem and where i think most of your reaction is sourced from. Yet it stops feeling like you're better then others when you take a more unitive identification to reality, and acknowledge you are every human on the planet, and the current human you're living through now is temporary and impermanent. Then you'd be hoping that everyone is spiritually talented or that spiritual talent is infinite rather than finite. Because for sake of argument, you might reincarnate into the most unspiritually talented person on the planet in your next life if it is finite. Spiritual talent actually becomes a bitter pill to swallow then some feel good egoic mechanism once you grasp the finite ness of it. From a unitive perspective it actually becomes deeply selfish to not take the acknowledgement of spiritual talent seriously, because you're neglecting the unique needs and unequal challenges of others. Its like a billionaire saying capitalism is the way to go because everyone is equal. Well no not everyone is equal because of racism, class, genetic illnesses, genetic predispositions, etc. And by saying everyone is equal you are selfishly denying the actual unequalness of what others go through and therefore prevent true means of attempting to make things equal(like curbing racism, implementing aspects of socialism, etc). In a similar way but not acknowledging spiritual talent, you dismiss the unequal challenges of less spiritually talented people and therefore prevent opportunities to help make spirituality more equal(like adding psychedelics) Acknowledging spiritual talent is actually an empathetic mechanism.
  4. This isnt a spiritual talent thing, this is an awakening thing. Awakenings change your paradigm as radically as reincarnation. Nahm keeps saying "The infinite cannot know the finite" and that is a good saying. You cant wake up and still remember what its like before awakening. Its not how it works. You literally reincarnated. @Leo Gura Whenever i read your posts you give off the vibe that psychedelics are some revolutionary magic pill far more effective then meditation, gurus and everything else. Is this your position? Im really curious, and struggling to see how your experiences on psychedelics are so profound and what makes it more profound then sober. I'd love if you could explain more. Sober feels to me more grounded, and crystal clear. Sober is as clear as you'll get. Psychedelics always adds in spatial distortions and makes your mind go hyperactive and just makes things unnecessarily spooky and nuts. Like a needless alice in wonderland. The other thing is, its a memory. And memories are highly distorted. Sober is now and clear. And you come down. All insights, awakenings were sober. I dont know what ya talking about with psyches. In my personal experience, i took 4 mescaline trips, each with 1 metre of cactus, and all trips were highly mild. I then took 3 ayahuasca trips(high doses) and again trips were highly mild. I then took about 30 grams of peganum harmala in frustration and had a powerful trip but no ego death and barely any breakthrough. No dmt machine elf entities, and it was only scary because i didnt expect peganum harmala to be a psychedelic of itself and had work in 8 hours of taking it. I really resonate with Ralston on psychedelics and see where he's coming from. And im not spiritually talented either so i resonate with him on a normal human level, not on a unique brain chemistry level.
  5. But Good isn't different to being fucked up. Good includes being fucked up. Or thats what it seems forestluv would say based on his earlier comments
  6. just posting here to make sure you dont think your dream friends you created are rejecting you
  7. if you're triggered without someone blaming you, judging you, saying something racist, someone being condescending or someone speaking to your personal self(speaking generally), that's a sign that the triggering is an ego defense mechanism to protect yourself from seeing the truth.
  8. yeah you oldies still stuck on AM, have a good sleep
  9. excellent! That's what I was pointing to before, great work, really glad for you!
  10. Ok then, my bad. I misunderstood your situation. I thought you were a humanities academic who takes psychedelics recreationally. If you're actually someone in a psyche ward, or you're half someone in a psyche ward, teach part time, or something like that, I apologies because I was being harsh saying you were exaggerating. Just keep in mind I'm not taking about theory, I'm talking about actual psychotic experiences. But I can definitely see how such psychosis would seem like a walk in the park compared to more extreme spiritual practices like what you've done. Its not like I havent experienced anything you're talking about, I got banned remember partially(or at least in relation) to such experiences you're pointing to. Well I try to be (including in this dialogue) as honest as possible, and just share things which deeply feel right to me. I simply said you were exaggerating because there were inconsistencies between your previous posts and these posts, that I knew for sure because I read them. I had no intention of projecting beyond that inconsistency, because anything beyond that was unknown to me. Now that I know more, I'll react differently next time. I try to be(and believe I did) very conservative when it comes to projecting what other people experience, their situation, and capabilities of consciousness. And my previous comment about avoiding trauma was just my experience I was sharing, I wasn't trying to project anything onto you. If you're so traumatized that my comment sounds absurd, I totally agree with you partially, because I have been in places where I needed to take a break off psychedelics because I was about to loose my job, sanity, everything if I continued(almost did, I stopped going to work for 2 weeks and just lived in the bush without a tent and camping gear without giving them noticed, would never post that experience here because I would get banned like the other time). I was just expressing one perspective out of many for sharing, not trying to say that particular perspective is absolute or better then yours. I'm super curious about your experiences, and would love if you shared more. The very few you have shared are fascinating to me, super fascinated about getting the ego again one. I wont judge at all if that triggered you, I've messaged you privately in the past on similar lines. Although I have a feeling that you don't want to share those experiences beyond just people judging you.
  11. @Someone here so maybe you're finally ready to admit that the boogey man is as real as your bed?
  12. I was being literal. You said you are in the psyche ward for the rest of your life because of that experience. That's incorrect because you're an academic, and you're talking on here. Ff you're being metaphorical, then that's on you to explain, because I can't read your mind. I'm not trying to devalue your experience, but if you aint willing to go insane, get schizophrenic and psychotic symptoms, you aint discovering the truth. That's factually correct for almost everyone (except the deeply spiritually talented).
  13. but that's what you want too, you just don't realise it yet Once you've lived 40 or so years of your life solving problems and being a hero, you'll get sick of solving problems and being a hero, and want to not solve any more problems. That's when you'll die.
  14. The only difference is, you have infinite amount of problems to solve, I've got 0 I'm not saying I'm a saint. I am solving problems and living in this society, I just know deep down its survival and selfishness. I don't see selfishness as a bad thing, I see it as part of the process of the universe waking up to itself, like how scaffolding is part of the process of making a building. True paradise is when you die, because that's when you have no more problems to solve, just love, and the process of going through the selfishness(world) is what makes death a trillion times better, its like the icing on the cake. And you can die now, by seeing that you are already dead, and there's nothing to solve. Because this place already is a utopia. But on the relative level you can still play the game and solve problems.