Bossy girls

[Sincerity]

5 hours ago, flowboy said:

So perhaps that's not the best example, but where do you draw the line then?

Dunno, I'd draw the line intuitively.

4 hours ago, flowboy said:

I've met someone who has strong negative opinions about Musk, and when pressed, it turns out she just makes the "he's rich so he must be bad" argument. She didn't know anything about him. To me that's quite unintelligent, to be judgmental of people without bothering to look into them.

Sure, that's just plain stupid if true.

4 hours ago, flowboy said:

This willingness to be completely uninformed yet completely judgmental, that wouldn't bother you?

It most likely would. If I noticed that, it'd be a red flag. But I don't know whether that was the case with the girl from OP's story.

It could also happen that a mind perceives someone as "completely uninformed yet judgmental" when that person doesn't share their perspective on some matter. You know, a defense mechanism. I'd be careful with making such assessments about others. And when You're triggered by judgementality, there's probably some in You...

4 hours ago, flowboy said:

Nonjudgment is a value of mine so it does bother me. This girl would be incompatible with me.

Fairs.

Overall I think we're mostly in agreement. ?‍♂️ No reason to split hairs. Or at least I don't want to anymore.

[Princess Arabia]

5 hours ago, flowboy said:

Nonjudgment is a value of mine so it does bother me. This girl would be incompatible with me

Respectfully speaking, as I do value your opinions, but isn't this also judgemental? You know how the saying goes, " believing not having any beliefs is the way to go, is still a belief. Aren't you judging her for having judgements? Explain this to me as it's coming from a place of genuine curiosity of the meaning behind this perspective. 

Edited September 21, 2023 by Princess Arabia

[flowboy]

16 hours ago, Princess Arabia said:

Respectfully speaking, as I do value your opinions, but isn't this also judgemental? You know how the saying goes, " believing not having any beliefs is the way to go, is still a belief. Aren't you judging her for having judgements? Explain this to me as it's coming from a place of genuine curiosity of the meaning behind this perspective. 

I don't really mean not judging at all, I mean that I value making judgments carefully and holding them loosely, appreciating nuance and complexity.

Things like playing devil's advocate and being open-minded are something many people can't do, especially when it comes to things they're too attached to.

People who judge a person instantly without knowing anything, well, I judge those people

But not instantly, I judge them because I've observed them be mentally lazy.

If I were free of shadow, I probably wouldn't judge them but still not prefer them in my inner cirle.

Edited September 22, 2023 by flowboy