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Natasha

2 yrs later and still grieving the loss of my pet

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It's been almost 2 yrs since my beloved dog Max passed and I still find myself deeply feeling the loss. He was such a wonderful and loyal companion for over a decade. I was doing fine for a long time, until a few days ago while visiting my coworker who has 2 little dogs. All of a sudden all the emotions and memories about my Max started to flood back, the bitter sweet mix of both the happy and sad. I miss him so much, he's on my mind when I go to bed at night and the first thing when I wake up in the morning. I'm doing some inner work on the stages of grief to consciously process this and heal.

Will there ever be a closure, a letting go? Please share if you've had a similar experience with a beloved pet. Thank you <3

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Posted (edited)

Max represents something very significant in your life, it may seem obvious but on a deep level, it’s your divine will, your essence, to be who you truly are, and to be appreciated for exactly that 

can a dog be a catalyst for spiritual transformation, why not? There will not always be closure in the way you think, choose gratitude 

I met a dog yesterday named Merlin and he’d been rescued from a prison, suffered from abuse and neglect, he’s triggered by most strangers especially those with more chaotic energy. The owner is on a journey (road tripping to Alaska apparently) with a dog teaching her how to create a new healthy sense of self with boundaries, pure expression/self worth. Coming face to face with bypassed fear/insecurity and trauma. No longer can she seek externally for what has been and felt lost from within, a beautiful transformation awaits, the journey ever deeper HOME

The dog Merlin is a good representation of how I’ve been feeling for a while now, trapped, unappreciated, untrusting and undervalued by those who I thought loved me the most. Desperately my mind tried to fix and mend things externally, to help others and give give give, while struggling to fight and work with the energies that continued to suppress me, to keep ME hidden. A calling for big change, an acceptance to forgive and let go of people, situations and beliefs no longer in alignment, and allow new energies that will support and feed my soul growth and expression. It’s scary as fuck and requires radical faith in the unseen, to embody more truth, love and greater potential/opportunity/willingness to share myself with the world even if it doesn’t seem societally acceptable. I don’t have to share everything with everyone, I respect others (their journey and uniqueness) but will not play a role or watered down version of myself to please their world view. I am a limitless being 

Edited by DrewNows

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@Natasha @DrewNows  I feel deep appreciation for both of you, you both are my favorite guys on the forum. 

I feel your sense of loss. 

You have no idea how I felt when I lost my cat. I was just a teen. 

I still miss her deeply and I'll never forget the short life in which she gave me the universe.

She was gifted by my dad on my birthday who also passed away. 

The passing of both was sudden and untimely and created a deep wound inside me. 

I totally understand how grief feels like. 

I'm sorry for your loss and I hope some day we all find closure to the grief we experience in life.

Heartfelt condolences. :x

You both are beautiful souls. May God bless. 🙏💖

 


 INTP loner... .shy girl.. The devil loves me a bit too much. 

Quick access to journal entries

 

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The little puppies and kittens are there to comfort you, reminding you that if you ever need company, you can always play with them.

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Posted (edited)

1 hour ago, Natasha said:

It's been almost 2 yrs since my beloved dog Max passed and I still find myself deeply feeling the loss. He was such a wonderful and loyal companion for over a decade. I was doing fine for a long time, until a few days ago while visiting my coworker who has 2 little dogs. All of a sudden all the emotions and memories about my Max started to flood back, the bitter sweet mix of both the happy and sad. I miss him so much, he's on my mind when I go to bed at night and when I wake up in the morning. I'm doing some inner work on the stages of grief to consciously process this and heal.

Will there ever be a closure, a letting go? Please share if you've had a similar experience with a beloved pet. Thank you <3

So sorry to hear about your loss, losing something or someone you loved deeply can be just painful beyond words and I know how incredibly difficult it can be to come to terms with it; we can think that we've come to terms with it, but then something happens, as it has done for you, that triggers the pain that had receded into our subsconscious, and we realise that the pain hasn't been fully resolved as we might have thought it had.

I think the key is to allow your heart to break completely, which sounds simple enough in theory but can be much more difficult in practice simply because of how conditioned we tend to be to resist the heartbreak - if I have one piece of advice, it's to bring loving attention to that inner resistance, to notice how it feels in the body, and to allow it to release in its own time.

As I say, I know how painful it can be so my heart goes out to you - I hope you start to feel a little better soon :)

 

Edited by RickyFitts

'When you look outside yourself for something to make you feel complete, you never get to know the fullness of your essential nature.' - Amoda Maa Jeevan

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@RickyFitts Thank you <3

Yes I've been sitting with my pain and feeling a little better every day. Will try your 'loving attention to resostance' technique and allowing the time needed for healing. I've also used some talk and crying therapy. Work and art projects have been helpful distractions, so is going out in nature more. 

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18 minutes ago, hyruga said:

The little puppies and kittens are there to comfort you, reminding you that if you ever need company, you can always play with them.

Yes, someone else also suggested I consider volunteering at an animal shelter or get another pet. Time will tell if and when I'm ready. I do have lots of love and care to give, just need the right timing. Thank you <3

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The best advice I've ever heard for dealing with grief is to look for your loved one where they are, not where they are not. Non-duality means no exclusion, what is real is never lost and death is an invitation to connect with what is eternal. There is never any closure, there is never any letting go  because there is no death. He's still here, you just have to look for where he is, not pay so much attention to where he isn't. 

This can also possibly mean letting go of the pressure you're putting on yourself to let go and get over it. 

Also at the risk of sounding really strange and weird, start looking at the sky a lot. When we were kids our parents told us our pets went to live in the sky, well, it's not untrue. ;) 


My Youtube Channel- Light on Earth “We dance round in a ring and suppose, but the Secret sits in the middle and knows.”― Robert Frost

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@mandyjw Thank you <3 I do realize I got caught in the mind-story. And yes, he's here, I feel his presence around and in those moments this soft peaceful calmness comes over. The special connection Max and I shared is beyond the relative, it's indeed eternal. 

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@ivankiss Thank you <3 Will check the vids out today. Matt's talks have very comforting meditative quality, perfect in times like this especially.

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This is a lesson in impermanance and letting go.


You are God. You are Love. You are Infinity. You are Leo.

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7 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

This is a lesson in impermanance and letting go.

Yes, thank you, Leo <3

I re-watchef a couple of your videos this past week for a Meta perspective, were very helpful.

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Re-watch: Understanding Impermanence

That's the answer


You are God. You are Love. You are Infinity. You are Leo.

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4 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

Re-watch: Understanding Impermanence

That's the answer

Will do today, thank you!

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3 hours ago, Natasha said:

@RickyFitts Thank you <3

Yes I've been sitting with my pain and feeling a little better every day. Will try your 'loving attention to resostance' technique and allowing the time needed for healing. I've also used some talk and crying therapy. Work and art projects have been helpful distractions, so is going out in nature more. 

You're welcome :) Sounds like you're doing all the right things (particularly talk and crying therapy, that can really help to clear stuck emotions), so maybe it's just a matter of time now <3


'When you look outside yourself for something to make you feel complete, you never get to know the fullness of your essential nature.' - Amoda Maa Jeevan

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My dog died almost 4 years ago and I still occasionally feel pangs of sadness and loss now and then towards him. TBH most of the time in the past 2 years I just...don't think about him most of the time. Like he's forgotten. When he died though, for once I didn't let myself hold back any sadness that I had, I just cried and cried until I felt like I had exhausted some of that grief. I knew that he wasn't in pain anymore, and that he wouldn't have ever wanted me to stay grieving for him. So as of now I do feel like I have closure from him. Last week I saw some photos of him so I felt like I suddenly 'remembered' him again and I felt really mournful/missing him, I just let myself feel very sad for a few hours and then later I focused on all the good things in my life I have going on now. I guess that this would be much harder to deal with if I felt lonelier in my day to day life or had more unresolved emotions, but since loneliness isn't a problem in my life currently, grieving past deaths isn't such a forefront of emotions for me to deal with. Thats my experience anyway. 

Maybe adopting a new pet can help you bring closure?

Sorry for your loss <3 

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@Myioko Thank you for sharing and for the kind and comforting words, means a lot <3

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