I do not deserve to be LOVED

[ActualizedDavid]

Hey. 

I have a deep sense of that i do not deserve to be loved. 

When i'm with a woman . If she is not having this fear of intimacy and she can talk about intimacy stuff. I simply return the survivel mechanism and fear cames out. I feel afraid, i feel not good enough for her. 

My parents give me conditional love. On things. On action.s .etc So i know where this is coming from.

Hope you who been thru this can give me something to read or to watch,an idea or two,some exercises to do. So i can love myself and let be vurnerable.

Thx you !

[Nahm]

@ActualizedDavid

I love you. For me, you are enough, because you are. You don’t need to do anything, you don’t need to be anything. You are you, and that is not only enough, it is the greatest possible experience in all of the universe - just to be you. 

 

Where do you believe “it’s coming from”?

[ActualizedDavid]

@Nahm

Thx you Nahm , thx you ! I love you ! I like the feeling that your comment give me.

Ok. I was not raised with a lot of love. And my association at love is fear.

No,no,no, I'm not going there. ( That's my reaction )

I have a good attitude in life and i'm mostly present, but when intymate relationship.s came.... Hmmm . I can realize that i'm creating the fear. And the situation. But is not enough.

Most of the time when i bring this subject up ( like now ) i have a strong feeling in the center of my chest . A pressure.

[Nahm]

10 hours ago, ActualizedDavid said:

i'm creating the fear

There is only one possibly, one way, one “thing”...which can create “fear”.   Love. 

10 hours ago, ActualizedDavid said:

strong feeling in the center of my chest

Yes. Love is strong. Love is more than “strong”. Love is infinite. Love has no limit, no bounds, no rivel. Love makes all things possible. 

Just try to deny the Love that you are, the Love within. Just try!!!! 

It can not be denied. You can know you are the Love, because when you think negatively about yourself, the deepest you, the Truth that you are, the Love that you - it just won’t go there. It can’t! Because it is Love, it is Truth! It is You!

It will always be in you. It is your personal GPS, if you will. It has always been in you. 

The “fear” is a sensation in your body. That’s it. 

The sensation is a message.

The message says - “no, that thought’s not True!”

Listen to the message. Live your life in Love!

[ActualizedDavid]

Thx You ! The sensation is a message to get me on track with a life with love. 

@Nahm

[UDT]

3 hours ago, Nahm said:

@ActualizedDavid

I love you. For me, you are enough, because you are. You don’t need to do anything, you don’t need to be anything. You are you, and that is not only enough, it is the greatest possible experience in all of the universe - just to be you. 

love you Nahm, great reply

[Nahm]

@ActualizedDavid @UDT ♥️??

[Charlotte]

7 hours ago, Nahm said:

@ActualizedDavid

I love you. For me, you are enough, because you are. You don’t need to do anything, you don’t need to be anything. You are you, and that is not only enough, it is the greatest possible experience in all of the universe - just to be you. 

 

Where do you believe “it’s coming from”?

?❤️

[ajasatya]

@ActualizedDavid people may or may not love you. that's not their job.

loving you is your job. nobody else should be able to do it better than you.

don't allow anyone else love you more than yourself. if someone demonstrates love towards you, you better catch up!

[Markus]

@ActualizedDavid Self love has been a tough one for me. I have a deep unconscious dislike of myself that is yet to be resolved to any meaningful degree. Probably one of my deepest blockages, or if not that, most bothersome. Thus take what I say with a grain of salt. But here's an experiment:

Imagine someone you adore, someone you love unconditionally. Maybe imagine if you had a child, or a pet, as towards them it's probably easiest to get close to unconditional love. Because you can clearly see their innocence. How even if they mess up, it's because they don't know any better. It's just a child being a child. Or a dog being a dog. Picture it. How understanding you'd be of them. How forgiving you'd be.

Now, as a child grows up, life traumatizes them. In one way or another. Defences are created. Walls are built up. To protect that innocent being. One could say that innocence has been tainted. But isn't it completely understandable why this was a necessity. The child did what they could, and became an adult. One with scars, with cynicism. Afraid to open up again. Does that make them any less deserving of love? Everybody is like that. You are like that. Does that make you any less deserving of love? Why would you respond to that with anything other than love? The love you can feel for someone dear to you. Someone innocent but scarred. Like a wounded child. Allow yourself to expand that love to include yourself. All the things you dislike about yourself. Love the person in you who feels unworthy of love. Love all the scars you have acquired. To allow them to heal. To allow yourself to heal.

[ActualizedDavid]

@ajasatya  I'm gonna love myself more and more . So i can accept love in my life ! 

@Markus yes Markus ! Thx you for the wonderful explaing . 

 

I will not say any but this , but that !

I will try to find the woonds and accepte them and let them heal.

When i will start to beat myself up, and not give myself compassion and understanding . I will came here and read your comments !!

❤️

Edited February 23, 2019 by ActualizedDavid

[Markus]

@ActualizedDavid ❤️

[Nahm]

@ActualizedDavid We all love you, hope you have a nice day, and feel the love within David! ??

[legendary]

Self-esteem issues aren't uncommon. Some people are better at hiding them than others, that's all.

Check out the books by Nathaniel Branden and Maxwell Maltz.

Secondly, do psychedelics (responsibly). This will help you in getting in touch with infinite love. Go to spiritual events/retreats/workshops, which will expose you to environments where people can be loving, authentic and kind.

You are love. I went to a Bufo Alvarius retreat last year, where I realized this and yelled '"I am LOVE!" out loud at the height of my trip.

What people generally mean by love is validation, and that will only make you a slave. True love will set you free! 

[Joseph Maynor]

 

[Nahm]

@Nahm Last generation of men be like “bury it!”, “drink it away!”, “blame woman, kick the dog!”, “God damn president doesn’t know what he’s doin!”, “my boss is so incompetent!”. Sneaker fuckers. That made all this though. For us, basically. 

[CuteCornDog]

@ActualizedDavid Are you feeling guilty about anything you've done to people have loved you in the past? I wouldn't feel that way unless I felt guilty about the way I was with people who loved me in the past.

[pluto]

If that were the case you wouldn't be here at all. The fact that you are alive and aware should say enough.

[bejapuskas]

I love you guys ?❤

[Lister]

On 2/22/2019 at 2:12 PM, Nahm said:

@ActualizedDavid

I love you. For me, you are enough, because you are. You don’t need to do anything, you don’t need to be anything. You are you, and that is not only enough, it is the greatest possible experience in all of the universe - just to be you. 

This is true. How many people are there who dare not to be themselves? What a gift to be able to just admit what you are without resistance or fear. ?