Dating app and social media are fucking dating up

[something_else]

10 minutes ago, Alexop said:

According to Pew Research, about 12% of overall dating app users report finding a committed, long-term relationship or marriage through the platforms.

Wow sounds like shit.

That doesn't really add up, as something like 50% of LTRs start via dating apps now.

[BlessedLion]

I agree that Dating Apps and Social Media have made dating harder but still, plenty of men are having success amid the explosion of these things. You could also argue that porn to men is the equivalent of social media and dating apps to women.

I don't think complaining about it does anything, it's the time we live in, don't get blackpill about it. Men in the 90s could complain that the rise of feminism and internet chats is ruining dating, there is always some excuse. Don't blame the lack of results on the times.

[Valach]

26 minutes ago, something_else said:

That doesn't really add up, as something like 50% of LTRs start via dating apps now.

But there are also way more single people these day, which could explain it. I really see this as quite a big issue. When I was still dating last year I kept getting surprised by how often I would run into a conventionally attractive woman around age of 25 who would tell me she never had relationship. Even I managed that at her age as a heavy avoidant person hah.

[Alexop]

38 minutes ago, something_else said:

That doesn't really add up, as something like 50% of LTRs start via dating apps now.

I strongly doubt that. Maybe relationships that "originated online".

 

Edited 10 hours ago by Alexop

[Alexop]

27 minutes ago, BlessedLion said:

I agree that Dating Apps and Social Media have made dating harder but still, plenty of men are having success amid the explosion of these things. You could also argue that porn to men is the equivalent of social media and dating apps to women.

I don't think complaining about it does anything, it's the time we live in, don't get blackpill about it. Men in the 90s could complain that the rise of feminism and internet chats is ruining dating, there is always some excuse. Don't blame the lack of results on the times.

I was not complaining. I was noticing a pattern. And dating is hard nowadays. 90s were much better dating years. You need to be myopic to not see that.

[Schizophonia]

If even men are too shy to flirt imagine women.

Dating sites don't require much courage, but they can also easily cause suffering and generally lead to nothing for various reasons.It's a but the misery lol.

[Schizophonia]

13 hours ago, meta_male said:

I looked up those studies, some show slightly lower satisfaction.

Of course, texting strips away facial expressions, body language, tone of voice and feedback. Dating apps make it easier to meet people, but not necessarily easier to build connection.

Women are more likely to listen to their emotions (“energy in motion”). Men, due to social conditioning and hormonal differences, listen to them less; not because there is less emotion, but because it is more projected. This gives men the tendency to appear stoic, but also potentially the flaw of forcing things; whether in a “Nice” lol way, willingly because “just in case it might work,” or, at worst, in a rapist way.
 

The difference in behavior might lead people to believe that women are "shittesting"; this is a dismissive chud way of understanding what's happening. Women are simply more in tune with the emotional reality of what's going on and are more likely to exhibit a range of behaviors to protect their ego rather than being "straightforward" like a man. This "straightforwardness" isn't necessarily more rational either; men are more impulsive; they use drugs more, fight more, engage in more dangerous activities, etc.

 

From a non-dual perspective women are the projection of emotional reality.

[LordFall]

Level yourself up and you'll find yourself attracting single women in droves as opposed to the mass of boring and forgettable men out there. 

Have you built an interesting life and a well-thought-out Instagram to showcase it? If you're not using effective dating tools then you only have yourself to blame for your lack of success in this area. 

I've also talked about hosting your own events which further elevate your status and gives you even more opportunities to meet new women and content to post for your social media.

Have you hosted an event before? Do you post content? If you don't offer value to the world then predictably you'll be left mostly unsatisfied with the value you're getting in return and if you have a victim mindset you'll mostly complain instead of looking at more ways to offer value and thus be valuable to women. 

Also are you getting continuously rejected by women or have you not even worked up the courage to ask out a lot of them and then came to the conclusion that you're not wanted by the market? If you're an anxious man being frustrated that women are also anxious and not making moves on men then I got news for you: that's role in the dating marketplace. 

 

Edited 8 hours ago by LordFall

[Alexop]

33 minutes ago, LordFall said:

Level yourself up and you'll find yourself attracting single women in droves as opposed to the mass of boring and forgettable men out there. 

Have you built an interesting life and a well-thought-out Instagram to showcase it? If you're not using effective dating tools then you only have yourself to blame for your lack of success in this area. 

I've also talked about hosting your own events which further elevate your status and gives you even more opportunities to meet new women and content to post for your social media.

Have you hosted an event before? Do you post content? If you don't offer value to the world then predictably you'll be left mostly unsatisfied with the value you're getting in return and if you have a victim mindset you'll mostly complain instead of looking at more ways to offer value and thus be valuable to women. 

Also are you getting continuously rejected by women or have you not even worked up the courage to ask out a lot of them and then came to the conclusion that you're not wanted by the market? If you're an anxious man being frustrated that women are also anxious and not making moves on men then I got news for you: that's role in the dating marketplace. 

 

I did not ask for your dating advice dude. I was presenting something I noticed. I know what I have to do.

[something_else]

2 hours ago, Alexop said:

I strongly doubt that. Maybe relationships that "originated online".

 

This is a googleable stat.

[meta_male]

8 hours ago, Alexop said:

And yes, guys suck ass, so women have a hard time getting attracted to the few ones they meet randomly.

If that's true, then there's no competition, no? 

[Alexop]

43 minutes ago, meta_male said:

If that's true, then there's no competition, no? 

Yes. But women have very little patience to get to know men now. After they had so many bad experiences with low quality relationships and boring guys.

When you get scammed over an over, you just give up.

Edited 5 hours ago by Alexop

[Karmadhi]

23 hours ago, Alexop said:

I think I met the 10th woman randomly at an activity (I use to meet them at dancing, sports meetings, hiking events) that did not show interest for any of the guys present. After a while I see her on a dating app. They ignore all men who they can meet physically and scroll dating apps instead. The feeling of (there sure is a better guy somewhere) are keeping them single in their prime years. This is sad.

Man, I have literally thought of the same!!!!

Basically, they do 0 searching because they can always meet someone online

Only thing that is still providing relief, is that many girls still are either not using dating apps or are willing to go out with a normal guy outside apps that they meet on an event, as long as the person talks to them and builds some attraction.

In general it is making girls (even men tbh) way more lazy and less proactive

Before dating apps, they had to go out and put themselves out there and be social

They were also less selective because they had to pick with what they were exposed to

 

Edited 3 hours ago by Karmadhi

[Alexop]

30 minutes ago, Karmadhi said:

 

In general it is making girls (even men tbh) way more lazy and less proactive

Before dating apps, they had to go out and put themselves out there and be social

They were also less selective because they had to pick with what they were exposed to

 

They had to make some effort and get to know the guys, and make themselves VULNERABLE. It is not just because dating apps and social media, it is a change in culture. It is encouraged to stay single and "wait for the guy". It is just that "the guy" was in your face and you ignored him. 

And not just women. Guys too. Everyone is so afraid of vulnerability. Everyone is so fucking boring, they don't risk making some joke or sharing something deep. That makes them too vulnerable

It sounds that I am whining right now, but I felt the need to share this. It started to get scary when almost every girl I liked and started talking to in real life at physical gatherings, not even took the chance to get to know me. Just to meet her on dating apps later. 

And no, I am not some noobie in dating. I know how to talk to them and had lots of sex. 

But yea, it is fucking Sweden by the way. Imagine the social problems you have in your country and make it 2x worse. That is northen Europe  101.

Edited 2 hours ago by Alexop

[LordFall]

6 hours ago, Alexop said:

I did not ask for your dating advice dude. I was presenting something I noticed. I know what I have to do.

 

43 minutes ago, Alexop said:

They had to make some effort and get to know the guys, and make themselves VULNERABLE. It is not just because dating apps and social media, it is a change in culture. It is encouraged to stay single and "wait for the guy". It is just that "the guy" was in your face and you ignored him. 

And not just women. Guys too. Everyone is so afraid of vulnerability. Everyone is so fucking boring, they don't risk making some joke or sharing something deep. That makes them too vulnerable

It sounds that I am whining right now, but I felt the need to share this. It started to get scary when almost every girl I liked and started talking to in real life at physical gatherings, not even took the chance to get to know me. Just to meet her on dating apps later. 

Bro you're a random guy that apparently likes to complain and are refusing advice when given from someone with more experience than you. No wonder women aren't exactly swooning to be with you lol, you don't seem like someone who has embraced a value-adding mindset.

Genuinely women enjoy competent men that operate from their masculine core. Entitlement and victim mindset are the polar opposite of that. 

Edited 2 hours ago by LordFall

[Olaf]

@LordFall yes I completly agree with you on this, this is not helping him at all. Just get out and become more attractive. Lets not fall victim to these limiting thoughts. 

[Ulax]

@LordFall It is normal to dislike unsolicited advice

[Alexop]

56 minutes ago, LordFall said:

 

Bro you're a random guy that apparently likes to complain and are refusing advice when given from someone with more experience than you. No wonder women aren't exactly swooning to be with you lol, you don't seem like someone who has embraced a value-adding mindset.

Genuinely women enjoy competent men that operate from their masculine core. Entitlement and victim mindset are the polar opposite of that. 

Translation: I need to feed my ego giving a guy unsolicited advice.

[AION]

On 26-10-2026 at 7:39 PM, Alexop said:

I think I met the 10th woman randomly at an activity (I use to meet them at dancing, sports meetings, hiking events) that did not show interest for any of the guys present. After a while I see her on a dating app. They ignore all men who they can meet physically and scroll dating apps instead. The feeling of (there sure is a better guy somewhere) are keeping them single in their prime years. This is sad.

That is a victim mindset. As a guy you shouldn’t think about these kind of things. If she ends up as a cat wife with 10 cats. That is her concern and her problem. As a guy you have to be more like women. More agency/selfishness and having more to offer. Because you sitting at home feeling sad about women who don’t care about you is just not the way to spend your time. 

Edited 1 hour ago by AION

[Alexop]

2 minutes ago, AION said:

That is a victim mindset. As a guy you shouldn’t think about these kind of things. If she ends up as a cat wife with 10 cats. That is her concern and her problem. As a guy you have to be more like women. More agency/selfishness and having more to offer. Because you sitting at home feeling sad about women who don’t care about you is just not the way to spend your time. 

again, I shared something I noticed. I don't complain.