What are you proud of?

[Natasha Tori Maru]

@LoneWonderer I'll add that the process was slow. Very painful. Uncomfortable.

Lots of emotional issues came up through it. I don't know why getting into business and making a career did this for me. I'm still trying to work it out 🥹

But it has been the best thing for me spiritually. Strangely.

Edited 11 hours ago by Natasha Tori Maru

[LoneWonderer]

10 minutes ago, Natasha Tori Maru said:

@LoneWonderer I'll add that the process was slow. Very painful. Uncomfortable.

Lots of emotional issues came up through it. 

Was this something that you forced upon yourself or was growth forced upon you eventually (like all the hens came home to roost typa deal)? I ask because I see it very difficult for me to go at it alone unless change in this domain is literally forced upon me by the hand of god himself! (Jk about the god part, but yeah I see it very difficult to change by my own will).

Also in regards to business, I know you have previously mentioned on this forum that it's a family business. If it had not been for a family and strong support network, would you say you'd have had the will to go at it in business alone? Would you still have been in the place of growth today had your circumstances not have been that you started the business with people you love and that support you? 

Edited 11 hours ago by LoneWonderer

[Natasha Tori Maru]

25 minutes ago, LoneWonderer said:

Was this something that you forced upon yourself or was growth forced upon you eventually (like all the hens came home to roost typa deal)? I ask because I see it very difficult for me to go at it alone unless change in this domain is literally forced upon me by the hand of god himself! (Jk about the god part, but yeah I see it very difficult to change by my own will).

Also in regards to business, I know you have previously mentioned on this forum that it's a family business. If it had not been for a family and strong support network, would you say you'd have had the will to go at it in business alone? Would you still have been in the place of growth today had your circumstances not have been that you started the business with people you love and that support you? 

Definitely felt like it was externally forced. 

I would never have chosen to engage in a business, let alone construction. Literally the opportunity came up and I just thought 'why the fuck not?'. But I had to be in a place to even want to accept the opportunity.

I wouldn't have been able to do this without nepotism. Learning from someone with 40 years of commercial construction experience. But also, I am proficient at the role, and excel without feeling like I force myself. So I am not in this position without some merit. I was selected for the role because I had a mechanical problem solving mind. Resiliance. Positivity. Persistence. 

Combined with being a woman - I think I had a unique advantage there.

So there is some luck involved. Some blessings. But I had to do the work on my end and learn on the job. And fast. No education. Sink or swim. Regardless of it being a family business, if I failed in the role I would have gotten the axe.

Edited 11 hours ago by Natasha Tori Maru

[LoneWonderer]

3 minutes ago, Natasha Tori Maru said:

Definitely felt like it was externally forced. 

I would never have chosen to engage in a business, let alone construction. Literally the opportunity came up and I just thought 'why the fuck not?'. But I had to be in a place to even want to accept the opportunity.

I wouldn't have been able to do this without nepotism. Learning from someone with 40 years of commercial construction experience. But also, I am proficient at the role, and excel without feeling like I force myself. So I am not in this position without some merit. I was selected for the role because I had a mechanical problem solving mind. Resiliance. Positivity. Persistence. 

Combined with being a woman - I think I had a unique advantage there.

So there is some luck involved. Some blessings. But I had to do the work on my end and learn on the job. And fast. No education. Sink or swim. Regardless of it being a family business, if I failed in the role I would have gotten the axe.

Thank you for sharing. Sounds like it's the right role for you and like you've found your purpose in it. 🙏

[Natasha Tori Maru]

@LoneWonderer keep floating on through life - your current path is rock solid if you ask me. There is not right or wrong. See where it takes you. 

My only advice would be to consider seriously all opportunities that come by, no matter how unappealing they may appear 😁

[Spiritual Warrior]

Nice work everyone, it's important to appreciate how far you've come and you all have lots to be proud of👏

[Spiritual Warrior]

18 hours ago, Carl-Richard said:

Pride is a low emotion just above anger. It's mostly not worth focusing your time and attention on (unless you're working with the emotion). It's something you release when it happens (if appropriate) and get on with it. Try something like gratitude instead.

Interesting perspective, and I do remember that emotional model that has pride quite low, I think it's from Ken Wilber. The problem here is in a sense I am asking everyone to write down things that they are "grateful" that they accomplished, I just happened to use the word "proud." 

I think the reason "pride" is so low is because you are feeding your own ego, you are "proud" of yourself and yourself alone, and there's nothing wrong with that, I think that can be a very positive thing, but to be "grateful" for what you've accomplished is recognizing that you are not the only one that steered the boat, the universe allowed you to create these amazing things in your life and you are "grateful" for them. 

So a better way to phrase the post would be, "what is it that you are grateful for having accomplished in your life?"

Thanks for your perspective.

Edited 7 hours ago by Spiritual Warrior

[Spiritual Warrior]

15 hours ago, Oppositionless said:

Proud I meditated (kriya) every day for 3 months even if I fell off recently 

I like that you remained proud even though you fell off, you're right, this is still quite an achievement. And the next time you go for it, you will last 6 months! 

[gettoefl]

Pride for me is knowing what I am. Gratitude is who told me. I couldn't have done it alone. Pride is the extent to which I choose the real me. Most days are 10/10. Pride is making the ego humble. It's next to nothing but I do need it a while. It does my bidding not me its. It knows its place. It's my favourite pet. I'm grateful for it since without it how could I know me. I'm proud of me. I came a long way.

Edited 3 hours ago by gettoefl

[Carl-Richard]

4 hours ago, Spiritual Warrior said:

Interesting perspective, and I do remember that emotional model that has pride quite low, I think it's from Ken Wilber. The problem here is in a sense I am asking everyone to write down things that they are "grateful" that they accomplished, I just happened to use the word "proud." 

Then it would have to be "gratitude for the things that made me come to this point in my life", or else it's just pride with separate steps. If you put the focus on circumstances and how it was not you who created them, not even your own sense of motivation, drive, persistence, values, simply that these occurred in your life and you're grateful for them, then you're avoiding the "I am the thing" that underlies pride. I didn't choose feeling like I wanted to do x things. They simply occurred to me, and I did them because I wanted them. I had fundamentally no say, only in an illusory way. But I did do what I want, and doing what I want is important. I'm not removing the virtue of autonomy. Feeling like you're responsible in the moment is key for being an actor in the world. But dwelling on it in the past (or in the form of thoughts running parallel with the present), is ironically to give it away.

But of course, if you feel like you didn't want to do anything of it but you still did it, be it of shame, guilt, despair, or because you had to do it for some reason or another, then pride is understandable because it's a step up on the "emotional scale". But if you did things out of joy, pride pulls you down.

Edited 2 hours ago by Carl-Richard