manigoldo

Is Seeing an Escort an Ethical Choice? Let's Talk Honestly

26 posts in this topic

Hi everyone,

I’d like to open a respectful and thoughtful discussion on something that’s often whispered about but rarely addressed with real openness: the ethics of going with an escort.

Some argue that, as long as it’s between consenting adults, it’s simply a transaction like any other — no harm, no foul. Others feel it raises questions about power dynamics, emotional emptiness, or the commodification of intimacy. And then there’s the broader context: legality, safety, and whether someone is choosing that job freely or out of necessity.

I'm not here to judge or preach, just to hear what people think. Have you ever faced this question personally? Do you believe it's possible to approach it in an ethical and human way? Or do you think it always carries some form of moral compromise?

I’d love to hear different perspectives — especially if youve ever changed your mind on the matter.

Thanks for keeping it civil and real.

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Welcome to the forum. Please familiarize ourself with our Forum Guidelines: 

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Personally I wouldn't care, it's not my problem as long as I'm satisfied.

It also depends on the escorts, but even "exploited" escorts would be even poorer without it.
There's a reason their cerebral cortex chose to be escorts rather anything else.

States would probably do better to legalize brothels and regulate this activity if they don't already.

It's also probably healthier for men than pornography.

Edited by Schizophonia

Nothing will prevent Willy.

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Generally speaking it’s fine but also has associated health risks and is a dead end. It’s like fast food. You can rarely indulge and not have any issues but if you build your diet around it you will have issues. 

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16 minutes ago, Lyubov said:

health risks 

Don't lick your escort's ass if she hasn't showered.

That's why I always have my mini Hawaiian coconut mango shower gel...

bottle opening noise :P

Edited by Schizophonia

Nothing will prevent Willy.

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This woman is an ex-escort and Madam. She has some unique perspectives on escorting and dating in general, definitely recommend her channel:

In some ways, I feel like seeing a sex worker can actually be more ethical. If you just want sex, now you can get it without having to play many of the manipulative games guys often resort to playing. Just pay and be done.

Also, some of these women make an insane amount of money as an escort. In just a short period of time, they can basically set themselves up for life if they are smart about it. They would likely never make that kind of money otherwise except for marrying into it. So they are securing not only their long-term survival, but also their independence since the money is hers.

But of course, I imagine such work has to take a toll on women as well. To be able to separate sex and intimacy that easily requires a certain kind of mind. Exploitation is also a concern, though there do seem to be some brothels that are run relatively ethically. 

I think the biggest concern for guys is that it just becomes a substitute for non-transactional relationships. In which case you are going to miss out on a lot of real intimacy. These women are essentially professional actresses. They do not have feelings for you.


"Finding your reason can be so deceiving, a subliminal place. 

I will not break, 'cause I've been riding the curves of these infinity words and so I'll be on my way. I will not stay.

 And it goes On and On, On and On"

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3 minutes ago, aurum said:

I think the biggest concern for guys is that it just becomes a substitute for non-transactional relationships. In which case you are going to miss out on a lot of real intimacy. These women are essentially professional actresses. They do not have feelings for you.

Yes, spot on.

And then is it normal that a girl wins so much women for a such insignificant works when you have cleaning women on minimum wage ?

Edited by Schizophonia

Nothing will prevent Willy.

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4 minutes ago, Schizophonia said:

And then is it normal that a girl wins so much women for a such insignificant works when you have cleaning women on minimum wage ?

I wouldn't say it's insignificant work at all.

For guys, having sex is way more valuable than some cleaning service. So of course the women will charge more.


"Finding your reason can be so deceiving, a subliminal place. 

I will not break, 'cause I've been riding the curves of these infinity words and so I'll be on my way. I will not stay.

 And it goes On and On, On and On"

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7 minutes ago, aurum said:

I wouldn't say it's insignificant work at all.

For guys, having sex is way more valuable than some cleaning service. So of course the women will charge more.

No, making a dick ejaculate is easy. Housekeeping is difficult; housekeepers are brave people.

But capitalism doesn't reward useful work, so you end up with people who are useless but are millionaires and people who are useful but just survive.

Edited by Schizophonia

Nothing will prevent Willy.

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9 minutes ago, Schizophonia said:

No, making a dick ejaculate is easy. Housekeeping is difficult; housekeepers are brave people.

But capitalism doesn't reward hard work, so you end up with people who are useless but are millionaires and people who are useful but just survive.

It's not about capitalism, it's just how money works.

Money follows value. 

Whether it's hard physical labor or not is irrelevant. It's a question of how much it's valued.

I could go out into the forest and spend hours trying to move some heavy rock. But if no one values that service to pay me, then the end result is I will make no money. It doesn't matter how hard it is.

Sex with an attractive woman is extremely scarce and therefore valuable for many men. Scarcity of something you want = value.

Edited by aurum

"Finding your reason can be so deceiving, a subliminal place. 

I will not break, 'cause I've been riding the curves of these infinity words and so I'll be on my way. I will not stay.

 And it goes On and On, On and On"

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I have so much experience with ChatGPT to recognize its annoying writing from an airplane

It's like overhearing something bad happened in town and knowing exactly who did it :D

Anyway, having sex with an escort isn't worth a post on Actualized.org or even thinking about, which is probably why you asked ChatGPT to write this post in no time.

I have been dragged into the escort stuff due to my outstanding ability to attract the worst people into my life. It's like an expensive masturbation session. The guy who dragged those girls over to Europe is the one who's profiting the most. The girls will say they're signed with an 'agency', which makes it sound professional and non-exploitative.

It's cope for not having a girlfriend to fuck, watch some porn, and save yourself €150

If you live in Rome and speak fluent Italian, you really have no excuse; even Milan has good nightlife, and it's half the population. Some streets are filled with young prime-age girls, European women don't care what you do for work, they are probably still in college, and cycle to the grocery store

Edited by MarkKol

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28 minutes ago, aurum said:

It's not about capitalism, it's just how money works.

Money follows value. 

Whether it's hard physical labor or not is irrelevant. It's a question of how much it's valued.

I could go out into the forest and spend hours trying to move some heavy rock. But if no one values that service to pay me, then the end result is I will make no money. It doesn't matter how hard it is.

Sex with an attractive woman is extremely scarce and therefore valuable for many men. Scarcity of something you want = value.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Commodity_fetishism

You don't go to an escort because it's good most of the time; you go to an escort because you believe you can't have a girlfriend because of learned helplessness, because you don't have time to find someone due to your living conditions, because you've been hyped, or whatever. There is an individual and particularly social situation which influences and one could say objectively distorts the perceived value of a commodity.

I could take another example; for example, a millionaire YouTuber like Mister Beast.
His videos are crap and completely devoid of interest; the only reason they exist is that people have nothing else to do with their lives and are addicted to the easy content made possible by new technologies.
Why do these people waste their time with this when they could be consuming much more enjoyable things and what can we do about it? It's a real sociological question.

There are plenty of reasons that widen the gap between the price of a product and its true use value.

Edited by Schizophonia

Nothing will prevent Willy.

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13 minutes ago, Schizophonia said:

You don't go to an escort because it's good most of the time; you go to an escort because you believe you can't have a girlfriend because of learned helplessness, because you don't have time to find someone due to your living conditions, because you've been hyped, or whatever. T

Some guys would just like some pussy without a girlfriend. Such as myself, and Dr. House from House, MD. 

 

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28 minutes ago, Schizophonia said:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Commodity_fetishism

You don't go to an escort because it's good most of the time; you go to an escort because you believe you can't have a girlfriend because of learned helplessness, because you don't have time to find someone due to your living conditions, because you've been hyped, or whatever. There is an individual and particularly social situation which influences and one could say objectively distorts the perceived value of a commodity.

I could take another example; for example, a millionaire YouTuber like Mister Beast.
His videos are crap and completely devoid of interest; the only reason they exist is that people have nothing else to do with their lives and are addicted to the easy content made possible by new technologies.
Why do these people waste their time with this when they could be consuming much more enjoyable things and what can we do about it? It's a real sociological question.

There are plenty of reasons that widen the gap between the price of a product and its true use value.

There is no "true use value".

All value is relative and subjective.

I'm not claiming what people value is intelligent, non-compensatory, higher consciousness or even ethical. I'm just saying people value what they value, and they pay accordingly. Whether they should or not is irrelevant to that.

Many people value low consciousness garbage. So there's the reason for your price tag.

Also, many if not most men who go to escorts are married. It's not compensation for having a relationship, it's compensation for a sexless, intimacy-less marriage. See the YT channel I referenced earlier. She explains this all very clearly.


"Finding your reason can be so deceiving, a subliminal place. 

I will not break, 'cause I've been riding the curves of these infinity words and so I'll be on my way. I will not stay.

 And it goes On and On, On and On"

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24 minutes ago, Joshe said:

Some guys would just like some pussy without a girlfriend. Such as myself, and Dr. House from House, MD. 

 

Ahah yea but it's a minority of men


Nothing will prevent Willy.

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30 minutes ago, aurum said:

There is no "true use value".

All value is relative and subjective.

I'm not claiming what people value is intelligent, non-compensatory, higher consciousness or even ethical. I'm just saying people value what they value, and they pay accordingly. Whether they should or not is irrelevant to that.

Many people value low consciousness garbage. So there's the reason for your price tag.

People don't know or don't have access to what gets close of what is the best for them and this factor strongly globally alienates the price of the goods.

Talking about "basic consciousness" is liberal Confucianism; it tacitly implies that it's an individual process.
Except that no, it's essentially a social privilege to be more or less "highly conscious"; when you grant people more time, money, and opportunities in general, they automatically shift gradually toward healthier attitudes, closer to their deepest interests.

Quote

Also, many if not most men who go to escorts are married. It's not compensation for having a relationship, it's compensation for a sexless, intimacy-less marriage. See the YT channel I referenced earlier. She explains this all very clearly.

It's a minority of men what's more alienated by their libido and their marital situation, they are impulsive reactions.
What will generally satisfy the community the most? Create the most happiness? Hiring and well-paying cleaning ladies to keep a building clean, knowing that it's a difficult job, or allowing Jean Daniel to spend several hundred euros to empty himself into the pussy of a random girl rather than ending up on a paper towel.

A building lobby that smells good and several people who will be able to feed their children well, or condoms filled with sperm in a trash can.

Edited by Schizophonia

Nothing will prevent Willy.

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12 hours ago, Sincerity said:

Be honest: did you use AI to write this post?

 

This could actually be one of the worst unintended-consequences of AI:

We dont trust anyone anymore who really puts effort into his writing.

As LLMs become more intelligent they may more closely resemble a really deep human-thinker, so we will start to associate any deep thinking with AI.

The lines to detect what is AI and what is not definitely become blurrier and brurrier.


“The privilege of a lifetime is to become who you truly are.”

― Carl Gustav Jung

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4 hours ago, aurum said:

To be able to separate sex and intimacy that easily requires a certain kind of mind.

I would assume this goes both ways.

Because both customers and the prostitute are doing this.

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1 hour ago, Schizophonia said:

People don't know or don't have access to what gets close of what is the best for them and this factor strongly globally alienates the price of the goods.

I don’t deny that.

Of course there are self-reinforcing dynamics.

1 hour ago, Schizophonia said:

What will generally satisfy the community the most? Create the most happiness? Hiring and well-paying cleaning ladies to keep a building clean, knowing that it's a difficult job, or allowing Jean Daniel to spend several hundred euros to empty himself into the pussy of a random girl rather than ending up on a paper towel.

A building lobby that smells good and several people who will be able to feed their children well, or condoms filled with sperm in a trash can.

Okay, but the point is that’s still your perspective.

It’s not safe to assume people will value community wellness over their sexual needs. It’s not safe to assume other people will value what you think they should value in general.

There is no skirting the fact that escorts can consistently charge such high prices because the demand is there. Basic economics.


"Finding your reason can be so deceiving, a subliminal place. 

I will not break, 'cause I've been riding the curves of these infinity words and so I'll be on my way. I will not stay.

 And it goes On and On, On and On"

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@aurum Great share - thanks for the link. Agree with your take.

@PenguinPablo  I think there will always be some form of emotional entanglement going on (even if just slight, could be regard even) - how one deals with it is where their level of professionalism arises. Even if we aren't always aware of the emotions, they are generally there. Unless one is a sociopath. Just my thoughts !


Deal with the issue now, on your terms, in your control. Or the issue will deal with you, in ways you won't appreciate, and cannot control.

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