Hardkill

Where do you go to meet women now that you're in your 40s, Leo?

61 posts in this topic

Not everyone's either a sex-chasing-extrovert-chad or an enlightened-socially-detached-introvert-monk.

@Hardkill You don’t need to go all in on cold approach or force yourself into the nightclub scene if it's not your thing. Just start small. Talk to someone at the gym, café or wherever. Train your social muscle casually while you finish your degree. Also, half of it is timing and luck anyway. You’ll never feel like your life is fully in order...waiting for that moment is a trap.

Leo’s got a point. Just not one that applies to 99% of people in this forum section.

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1 hour ago, Something Funny said:

And you know that how?

I know and you will find out soon enough 

1 hour ago, r0ckyreed said:

Death is not the same thing as Insight, Nirvana, Awakening. If you go down Owen and Trump’s road, you will die never experiencing you are God in the human form. Everybody dies but not everybody lives. There is no Rome nor Nirvana in death.

After death there is rebirth. It is all fun and games. Just enjoy the ride. Not everybody have to be studious fucks busting their ass with DMT. If somebody wants to have a pious life or go around being  promiscuous and teach young men how to do it, it is all ok. Creation is perfect as it is. 

Edited by AION

“If we do the wrong thing with all of our heart we will end up at the right place” - C.G Jung 👑 

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5 minutes ago, AION said:

I know and you will find out soon enough 

Sure you do.


Death and decay 🥀

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Just now, Something Funny said:

Sure you do.

Your signature already says it. At least you know where your diet is going to lead you to. 


“If we do the wrong thing with all of our heart we will end up at the right place” - C.G Jung 👑 

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1 hour ago, AION said:

A lot of people are so delusional on this forum. Humans need social interaction to individuate and become their own person. That is just how people are build. Perhaps in old age, solitude is possible but if you aren’t old, it is not wise. People should stop following Leo blindly and read basic psychology or risk fucking themselves up totally. Society is like a womb that grows a person in the same way you grew as a baby in a real womb. The purpose is to get out of the womb but to get out you first need to fully and successfully embrace the experience. 

The irony is that there are probably people on this forum who have had God realisation experiences but are also too scared to ask the waiter for ketchup.

Having said that, from what I know Leo has pushed himself to be extremely sociable throughout his life despite not being naturally good at it. I don't think I've really seen him suggest that you should completely avoid socialisation anywhere. He's probably a good example of somebody who really has integrated and transcended the need for being sociable, while most people who claim they don't need to be sociable are actually just introverts who are terrified of people.

 

 

Edited by something_else

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51 minutes ago, something_else said:

The irony is that there are probably people on this forum who have had God realisation experiences but are also too scared to ask the waiter for ketchup.

 

lol


Nothing will prevent Willy.

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Not meaning to be condescending but how old are you all?

I am quite introverted and not social at all. 

Believe it or not, it could be a possibility those who prefer solitude now have had a full and rich social life when younger. Personally I have had that experience - and now am diving into something new alone. Half of you wouldn't believe how much social life I have had. You can't possibly understand life's growth stages until you get there. No amount of intellectualism is going to bring the same understanding as lived experience. 

Lots of ignorance in this thread. Lots of hearsay and beliefs. 

 

 

 


Deal with the issue now, on your terms, in your control. Or the issue will deal with you, in ways you won't appreciate, and cannot control.

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On 21/07/2025 at 8:43 AM, RendHeaven said:

@Leo Gura Actualized.org community IRL meetup when? :]

 

Do you think Leo would really want see us ahah

 


Nothing will prevent Willy.

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2 hours ago, meta_male said:

Not everyone's either a sex-chasing-extrovert-chad or an enlightened-socially-detached-introvert-monk.

@Hardkill You don’t need to go all in on cold approach or force yourself into the nightclub scene if it's not your thing. Just start small. Talk to someone at the gym, café or wherever. Train your social muscle casually while you finish your degree. Also, half of it is timing and luck anyway. You’ll never feel like your life is fully in order...waiting for that moment is a trap.

Leo’s got a point. Just not one that applies to 99% of people in this forum section.

No, I get all of that.

Though I want to do a lot of nightlife when I get enough of a chance to.

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1 hour ago, something_else said:

The irony is that there are probably people on this forum who have had God realisation experiences but are also too scared to ask the waiter for ketchup.

Having said that, from what I know Leo has pushed himself to be extremely sociable throughout his life despite not being naturally good at it. I don't think I've really seen him suggest that you should completely avoid socialisation anywhere. He's probably a good example of somebody who really has integrated and transcended the need for being sociable, while most people who claim they don't need to be sociable are actually just introverts who are terrified of people.

 

 

Perhaps what Leo did worked for him because it was his (individuation) path. But most of his followers are let’s say a certain type of people who just copy his lifestyle 1:1 and that is just a disaster. Enlightenment experiences too early in one’s development is like breaking a chick out of its egg prematurely (the egg being the ego self). Understanding psychology is so important. For example there was this other thread and this guy was on DMT and he thought the world was ending and he needed to do something to save the world from his mother’s basement. 😂

Edited by AION

“If we do the wrong thing with all of our heart we will end up at the right place” - C.G Jung 👑 

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3 hours ago, AION said:

Your signature already says it. At least you know where your diet is going to lead you to. 

Same place as you?


Death and decay 🥀

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3 hours ago, Natasha Tori Maru said:

Lots of ignorance in this thread. Lots of hearsay and beliefs. 

This is not how not meaning to be condescending works though...

@Hardkill So you're not really asking where to meet women...you're asking if it's still valid to meet them in the nightlife scene?

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On 7/20/2025 at 11:38 PM, Leo Gura said:

I rarely meet anyone these days. I have very little stomach for socializing.

@Leo Gura Same here. I just turned 34 two weeks ago, and as I look back at the past year, I am noticing myself becoming less and less inclined to socialize as each year passes. Nowadays, I spend the majority of my time in solitude. Part of it is me becoming more selective about who I socialize with, and that pool of people continues to shrink with time, and also me being extremely repelled by small talk. I do enjoy being in a public, busy space every now and then, where I can sit alone on a bench and just watch humans be human around me. I'm curious, do you see your tendency to socialize possibly changing for you with time?  

Edited by Moutushi

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If you are afraid of socializing or feel lonely, I strongly encourage you to socialize. This is huge for your development.


You are God. You are Truth. You are Love. You are Infinity.

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Oh, I already did a lot of that in my 20s. I feel I outgrew it with each passing year in my 30s:)

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6 hours ago, meta_male said:

sex-chasing-extrovert-chad or an enlightened-socially-detached-introvert-monk.

Thanks, I have a feet on both sides. I'll get a tattoo.

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12 minutes ago, Moutushi said:

I'm curious, do you see your tendency to socialize possibly changing for you with time?  

Perhaps after all my spiritual work is done I will be more inclined.

At the moment I crave total isolation.

Edited by Leo Gura

You are God. You are Truth. You are Love. You are Infinity.

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9 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

Perhaps after all my spiritual work is done I will be more inclined.

At the moment I crave total isolation.

Mmm, that sounds like my favorite environment. I took the advice that you had previously shared on this forum about easily setting up a retreat at home instead of going somewhere outside for a retreat, and I set up a dark isolation room in an empty closet in my house. Although I am considering changing things up a bit in the near future, and at one point going for a dark retreat at this location.  

https://www.thehermitageretreats.com/dark-retreats

Edited by Moutushi

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11 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

Owen is lost in a delusion. 

He doesn't know what the world is.

Chasing sex like a narcissistic dog.

I've taken on the real world and found it fool's gold, as has every other intelligent mind.

Not sure if I am a bit deluded here, but if I listen to Owen, and really earnestly try to get what he is saying I feel like he has some really deep experiential-understanding in some areas. Some of his insights seem to be gained by deep observation of experience. Of course he has some distortions and biases, especially related to Politics and Pickup Culture, but some of his experiential-insights are spot on. 


“The privilege of a lifetime is to become who you truly are.”

― Carl Gustav Jung

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