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I sometimes awaken at night and there is a conversation about enlightenment that was happening while I was asleep. I wake to just the tail end of the conversation and only get the last few words of it. I lay there and think to myself, "I wish I could of heard the whole conversation"! Also "who was I having the conversation with?" Last night I woke to a voice saying "that's because there is bliss on the inside, and junk on the outside". Weird ! But it happens often. Other times I know there was a conversation going on, but I have no idea what was said. Not consciously anyway. Does anybody else experience any thing like that? Maybe that's common?

That's interesting! The reason I asked about the void was, Once when I was meditating I experienced pure being. There was just a silent essence of myself. Just floating in infinite silence. Very peacefully. Blissfully. I had a whisper of a thought to totally let go and merge into that blissful silence. Than I disappeared into nothingness. I became non-existent. I only realized that after I returned to that state of pure being and silent bliss. After that experience happened I thought to myself, becoming the void is nothing to be afraid of because you don't exist when it happens. When I referred to other perceptions, I was eluding to perceiving higher realms. I wonder if those higher realms surround us always and we are actually occupying then now. And during sleep we sometimes directly access them. Also when we pass on we go back into the higher realm. From there we chose (as pure being) to come back again to the manifest realm (reincarnation) to work on ourselves and to help others in their journey. It's all or none, so to speak. Have we all decided to be here by choice? Do we all know in our hearts what we truly are, even though we may not be obvious from this point of view (the manifest realm). But everyone here is trying to remember what we truly are. Something bigger is driving all of us on this search. Who knows? Whatever it is it's way beyond the thinking mind.

it still is an experience within the experiencing of bliss....

For me enlightenment is experiencing who you really are. In essence. You become pure light and pure love. It is also the transformation process that comes after. Nirvana or paradise is the bliss, the ecstasy, the state of mind, the realization and the peace that you get and stays with you every single day of your life after enlightenment.

Nirvana is when everything drops away imo. Even the "I am"-consciousness with all it's qualities and states, be it love, bliss, pure consciousness, emptiness, unity, oneness, god or anything like that. My search is not over to be honest, but I have had enough experiences to know that different states in the realm of "I am"-consciousness is not Nirvana, however divine, heavenly or blissful it might seem or how "that's it!" or euphoric you feel. But I might also be wrong. Maybe even very wrong.

It is said you will be scared because the ego doesn't want to die and makes you feel this way. I still feel it is a legitimate question to ask why you would want to undergo death of ego in the first place. Of course no enlightened person looks back and says they regret doing it; they can't because they no longer identify with what they once were, nor even know who they are afterwards. It no longer appears to matter. However, the fact that they can no longer see the world as they once did means that something is lost, and, in bliss, this fact they cannot appreciate.

Following are words of UG. 1.To be yourself is the easiest thing. And you don't want to be in your state. You'd rather be somebody else, imitate the life of somebody else. That's your problem. To be yourself doesn't need any time at all. But you talk of timelessness, which is a mockery. To be yourself, do you need time? To be a good man, to be a marvelously religious man, to be in a state of peace, to be in a state bliss, naturally you need time. That will always be tomorrow. When tomorrow arrives, you say, "All right, day after tomorrow." That is time. [I am] Not [talking about] this metaphysical or philosophical thing. I am not talking about metaphysical time and timeless. There is no such thing as the timeless. 2.What takes you away from your state is this movement in the direction of wanting to be in some state other than yourself. To be yourself doesn't need time. If I am a village idiot, I remain a village idiot. Finish. I don't want to be an intelligent man. Even if my neighbor takes advantage of his extraordinary intelligence and exploits [me], good luck. What can I do? To accept the reality, this is the reality of the world. There is no other world. There is no other reality, ultimate reality. This is the only reality. You have to function in this world. You can't run away from this world. How can you run away from this world? Because you are that world. Where you can you go? Hide yourself in a cave? Yes, you are taking your thoughts wherever you go. You cannot run away from your shadow. It's there all the time. So, you can't do a thing about thought. That's all that I am saying. When you realize the absurdity of all your effort to do something about the thought -- it's creating the problem; it's misery for you; you can't do anything -- when you can't do anything, when you realize that you can't do a thing about it, it's not there. You are not using it [thought] as a means to get something for you. 3.I want to say this again. You desire. If you do not want anything, there is no thought at all. You understand? Wanting is thinking, it doesn't matter what you want -- want self-realization, want God-realization -- you want anything, that means you have to use this instrument. These are not your thoughts, these are not your feelings. You may not like it. They belong to somebody else. You want to make them your own. You have unfortunately made them your own. That's why you ask all these questions. Why do you ask all these questions? These questions have been put before to so many people -- all the sages, saints and saviors of mankind, the holy men dead and alive. They are all ready to answer. They have composed a lot of lullabies. You go and listen to them and go to sleep, if you want to. That's what you are interested in. You want somebody else to pat on your back and say, "Oh, fine, just fine, you are doing very well. Do more and more of the same and you will reach the destination you want to arrive at." 4.You want comfort. You want affection from the person you are living with. You want this, that and the other. But what you want to get -- the GET of all the 'gets' -- you are not going to. That [what you want to get] is in relationship with your enlightenment, your freedom, transformation and all that kind of thing. There is nothing to get from me or from anybody. You want to be at peace with yourself. You will not get anything from anybody. All this is disturbing the peace that is already there. Your idea of peace is altogether different. 5.Because there is a constant demand on your part to experience everything that you look at, everything that you are feeling inside. If you don't do that, 'you' as you know yourself and as you experience yourself is coming to an end. That is a frightening thing. You don't want to come to an end; you want continuity. All the spiritual pursuits are in the direction of strengthening that continuity. So, all your experiences, all your meditations, all your sadhana -- all that you do is strengthening the 'self'. They are selfcentered activities. Whatever you do to be free from the 'self' is also a selfcentered activity. The process you adopt to attain what you call 'being' is also a 'becoming' process. So, there is no such thing as 'being'. Anything you do -any movement, in any direction, on any level -- is a becoming process.

Some benefits of Enlightenment: you feel complete, there is no lack, you're lacking no-thing it's not that you have no goals or desires, but those are not comming from a sense of lack, and as you are already complete and "nourished", you do not clinge to the outcome of your doings. you follow your basic nature, you know your core-signature and know if you deviate from your center. This enables you to come back home whenever you want. as you are already nourished, you do not accumulate stuff that is of no importance to your unique nature. The easiest way to enlightenment is to acknowledge the fact that you do not lack anything. Everything is already perfect. All the imprefections are mere labels on top of your experience. See through the illusions you projected and/or have agreed upon. When your mindfulness is such that you no longer have any urge to give meaning to stuff, pull-in experiences from the past or fears about the future and project them on top of what is there, you're home. Once there, you will have your point of reference, your unique signature. Don't try to reach enlightenment from a lack of enlightenment. Theorethically speaking, you're always enlightened, or, more precisly, your basic nature is always there. The clouds of imperfections are darkening your light. Therefore, before you reach your light for the first time, you work from the bottom to top, knock-knock, you knock on the door. Once there, you have a new outlook, an enlightened view on your existence and can now pervade differently. You will still have "work to do" to maintain your new found, centered "position". This will be your journey of enlightenment, as your first enlightenment was only a glimpse at how beautiful existence actually is. Bon voyage! Never beat your self up for not being enlightened. You are. If only you stop producing the lack of it. As an anecdote: the snake came to Eve in the Paradise and said she should eat from the tree of which God said, if they eat from it, they would die. But the snake told Eve, that if she eats from it, she would be able, like God, to differentiate Good and Evil (labels). They eat from it, and ever since suffered from the use of labels. They've been already perfect, perfect life. The lack was promoted by the snake and Eve and later Adam did buy it. They were told that God is better than them and wants to prevent them from being as potent as He is. Well, that makes for a beautiful lack, doesn't it? Don't buy it. If you've found your nature (which is connected to all there is), there is no lack anymore. You may want to upgrade your surroundings, but you won't clinge to it as if your existence and bliss would depend on it. The whole existence becomes a part of you and you a part of the whole existence, abundance all around and perfection in all there is. No lack. Nothing is not-done. Snakes that come your way are gently handled. You know where you go if you go. Nothing is missing. Your longing for others to see how you see arises. You learn that they have their own, unique signature and that they will approach exisistence in their own fashion. And also this is perfectly fine, as it only extends the infinity of all there is. You will still play. You will still entangle yourself with games. But it will be from a different perspective. And you will know how to come back home. ~ Chris

@WelcometoRealitySeparate what is true and what is not.. Your awakening was true, a beautiful deep experience and realization. That is true. Give yourself credit for that. These experiences are so profound and so amazing that it is easy to fall in the trap of trying to hold on to them. You try to hold on to that certain state of mind. Its kind of natural. Dont feel bad for that. What you have to accept and understand is that everything in this universe is subject to change incuding your emotional state. Thats just the way it is. Trying to hold on to anything is just a form of resistance. Enlightenment is not about staying all the time in some magical, neverending, high state of bliss. It is about being ok ( accepting) the fact that your state of mind will fluctuate. I hope this helps..

1. Become self-actualized 2. Discover my deepest passions and my life purpose 3. Master creative writing 4. Re-capture a childhood experience 5. Travel the world 6. Have intimate and deep friendships. Make best friends with artists, comedians, creative writers, theater lovers, bibliophiles, cinephiles, and self-actualized people. I want my best friend to be a free spirit who loves life and who is just as passionate as I am. 7. Be in a constant state of happiness. Not just temporary happiness but a deep feeling of bliss and enthusiasm 8. Live a single and child-free lifestyle so I can be free and pursue my passions 9. Live abroad in Mexico or Thailand or somewhere tropical 10. Help people master their creativity and discover what makes them unique

I see living consciously as a heightened awareness. Being aware of yourself, your thought and actions, motive. What drives you and makes you tick at any moment in time. And not just you, but the world and other people. I have an analogy for this: The car and and driver. The driver get in to the car and drives from a to b. The car serves a purpose, it provides a means and a function. The drive doesn't care how it works. He isn't even aware of it. He doesn't give it a second thought. Just does what he was taught to do to get it to operate in the way he needs to get from a to b. They don't recognise when something ins't quite right, what that noise was, why it felt odd, what needs servicing and when. When they hit some ice they don't know what is happening, why the car moves as it does and how to control it. They are unaware of the limitations of the machine and their own abilities. But imagine that someone studies engineering. They took cars apart and rebuilt them. They knew how they worked, intimately. When they get in and drive they know in their mind everything that is going on. Every sound, every vibration, feeling, They know how to interpret every motion and respond to it so if they drive over ice they can maintain control because they can 'feel' exactly what is happening. When something breaks, they know how to recognise it and fix it. When they hear that tell-tale sound they can repair the fault before it breaks down. They know how to drive efficiently and causing minimum wear to the machine. They know the limitations. The simple driver lives in ignorant, naive bliss. But as a consequence they are unaware of so much and on occasion that will come back to bite them. The engineer is totally connectied to the car, is aware of everything that is going on. He can respond to problems more effectively and consciously. It is the same with living consciously. The conscious person is more aware of the mechanics of their own mind and the world around them. Living uncosciously is a bit like operating on 'autopilot'. Being a passenger. Where as conscious people aren't the passenger. They are the pilot.

Maan, I love your post. You have just summed up my first strong determination sittings. You're doing great. You probably have just purged the amount of shit you would've with 3 months of normal "bliss" meditation. Look the next days for some silence and peace in your head. Maybe you'll find some. But, if you want to make this a habit (what I can really recommend) I'd definitely say you start off a little slower. Cut back some minutes, maybe go with 30-60 minutes at first and sit this through for a few dozen times. What will happen is if you do that you will be in complete peace and silence after you've transcended this time span. Then maybe go a little bit on. Cheers to you, can you see how this could be the fastest way of waking up? It just rips everything out of you, throws it in your face and lets it crash onto the floor. That is real progress.

Yeah. Totally true. People just switch their vocabulary but underderlying is the same structure. It is possible with every concept, also the "neti neti" approach. "Everything is illusion", "i am the whitness", "i am", "nothingness", "emptiness", "unity", "Self", "no self", "here and now", "love", "bliss", "be still", "you are that"... Different traditions have different words and concepts which can be taught to a parrot which doesn't render him awake. Even though "he is also the one". Of course. "Have you read the bible?" today is like "Have you read 'I am That'?". And "have you heard of Jesus?" now is almost like "have you heard of Ramana?". Expressions and pointers of truth can quickly become just concepts if not spoken from truth. But they all can be amazing pointers if they are spoken from truth.

@Makkatya back to the original question : Can one love unconditionally without being enlightened? don't wait till you think you're enlightened (it still be an other conceptual thing for the mind before you really experiment it) every step you go with somebody overcoming old fears and leaving them aside is liberating, is on the way to unconditional love.. Being conscientiously totally exposed to what ever emerges and embracing it without any fear, would be the ultimate. But again every step you go in this direction is a bliss

we are not here to judge enlightenment through our logical minds. as Leo always said enlightenment cannot be communicated,.. you should experience it in order to know the actual bliss.

We all seek the same thing: HAPPINESS The true essence of happiness is to flourish and gain fulfillment and joy from what you GIVE TO the world as oppose to what you GET FROM the world. Once all of humanity realises this, then the Kingdom of God will awaken within us all. In November 2015 I made a vow that I would find true happiness. From the moment I made this vow, my life has been miraculously unfolding in ways I could have never imagined. Thus I write this journal to share my experiences as I embark on my commitment to life-long learning and a pursuit of self-mastery. I hope to be able to connect with people on this forum in order to disperse further wisdom, love and peace. As I follow the bliss that is within me I become more fearless. I am on a hero's journey and I am ready to fight my internal wars in order to enable me to impact the world with what I can authentically offer to humanity. I have a long way to go, but I will not back down. For growth is an infinite process and fear is an illusion. So bring on the challenge! May peace, love and happiness be with you all! My experiences so far as I awaken: 20th-21st January 2016 - what felt like a high consciousness dream I had a dream. I am not even sure if it was a dream, but from what I could make of it, I was experiencing some sort of emotion. My heart was beating fast, and my body was shaking. It felt like I was having an anxiety attack. My thoughts were all over the place. Then a peaceful voice inside me said: ‘now transcend it’. And at that moment, I felt a deep sense of inner peace and wholeness consume my entire body, both internally and externally. I feel like it was a message. A message telling me that if I face challenges or hardships, I should accept them without judgement. Take responsibility of them and remain awake. Remain aware of my emotions and observe them. And from that awareness I call onto my inner being and transcend these emotions that would normally enslave me. I felt that with this knowledge, I could transcend anything. Has anyone ever experienced something like this before? Physical experience (almost indescribable) I was in my bed, in a light sleep with thoughts fluctuating through my mind. Then something happened to my body. I believe I was laying on my back and all of a sudden I felt what I can only describe as my heart bursting open, causing a sensual blast of warm tranquil blood consume my entire being (es blood). It was as though my heart AND chest were previously confined in shackles of deep confinement, and were now unlocked into their true nature of pure peace. It was as though a strong shining light exploded in my chest. But it didn’t FEEL like an explosion. There was no pain of any sort. Just the feeling of wholesome bliss. Since then. Truths of our existence have been revealing themselves to me, as though pieces of an infinite puzzle are slowly coming together. What’s ever more strange, is that I feel all I am discovering is not new knowledge to me. It feels like I am remembering… 27/01/16 - Realisation that woke me up from my sleep It's hard to explain, but I didn't actually remember my dream. I just woke up randomly at 6am in the morning, turned on my laptop and typed this up: Ego is developed as a mechanism to protect itself. As an adult, the ego is immature. Still like a child in an adult body, refusing responsibility for own decisions and refusing/denies/resists having to deal with the consequences. Believes in an ‘I’. This solid individual. Solid entity. As adults we have an undeveloped ego (some more than others). We need to let the illusionary individual self-die. Rebuild the ego. Resist no longer. Take responsibility and ownership of your past experiences. Forgive yourself and learn to love yourself again. Take the leap and follow your bliss in order to be in alignment with your true being. Take responsibility and deal with the consequences in order to regain power over your life. Has anyone had an awakening experience that woke them up from their sleep before?

I would like to share the physical symptoms I had a year and a half ago during the period I had total shift in my consciousness and realization. I'm sharing this because I was somehow confused when these symptoms first happen, but let please not fall into the illusion of having these symptoms if you haven't encountered any, we all naturally has a tendency to imagine when we read about any symptoms. just be conscious about what you read here and be honest with yourself about what you feel. Some of my symptoms are referred from Stewart Wilde Audio book (Journey Beyond Enlightenment), Adyashanti talks, and few websites/articles here and there, and I was able to refer to it within my personal experience. Please don't exactly believe what I'm writing here, keep in mind that some of these symptoms can be serious physical illness or deficiencies. This DOESN'T mean not to check the doctor! 1 - Twitches all over the body, Especially around the lower leg, At first I thought I might be having signs of ALS or Parkinson disease, I went to check several doctors, and they diagnosed it as stress.. that was nearly one and a half years ago, well if there was anything serious I think I should be on a wheel chair by now. 2 - Subtle numbness/tingling all over, it feels like little stars dancing around my body, especially around in my head and skull, although accompanied with comfort, they did not feel like serious illness or damage. I asked two doctors, one asked me if I took any drugs, I said no, later on they both diagnosed it as stress, although I was so far from being stressed (at least I think). 3 - Energetic electric shocks while trying to sleep: Sleeping patterns totally been messed up, I don’t feel that I need to sleep whenever I want to sleep, there is some energy that keeps waking me up each time I try to sleep. I couldn’t force myself to sleep, I was more energetic for doing something I have been wishing to do during my day, when I talked to a doctor, he stated these were not seizures, but stress, he asked me, “you look like an ambitious guy, but are you really doing what you really love during your day?” I couldn’t disagree. 4 – Transparent shiny colorful noise all over my vision: Accompanied with relief and bliss whenever I shift my attention to them, it’s a flickering transparent overlay layer that feels like coming from somewhere behind my eyes. And sometimes they take geometrical shapes if I focus in some ways, I had these since I was an innocent kid, but they faded away as I grew up, and now they are coming back even stronger along with my gradual awakening, I never knew if these are eye glitches or spiritual receptivity, I’m just aware that they become stronger in days where I feel relaxed, humble, surrendered, and I’m not so identified as the Mind or the Body. 5 – Clicking Sound around my head and neck: It could be nothing but some internal gas vesting or body liquids pumping , I'm noticing I'm have lots of these lately and this grabbed my attention because Stewart Wilde mentioned it in his -good but a little fairy talish- audio book (Journey beyond Enlightenment), and he described it as a Floppy Disk formatting noise, he said it’s divine information receptivity! I don’t want to believe, but I wanted to leave it open for speculation. 6 – Strong Sense of Distinction A strong sense of contrast between the physical happening and inner timeless silence, and a sense that what is happening here is way different that what is happening there. One feels like I’m in a 3D software, and the other is, just a realized nothingness, they are completely two different realms. the contrast becomes stronger when I walk, visit new places or do exciting physical actions with some inner attention. Again please don’t take these for granted, I think everybody’s experience is different, Stewart Wilde (and also Adyashanti) talked about many other symptoms that I did not experience myself. Now Tell us about your experiences, and what do you think!

@ayokolomo maybe it can be helpful to you to read books were people get enlightened without wanting it, and with not so much effort. Really there's always effort, but it doesn't mean we know it. I am not saying that you don't have to make an effort to be enlightened, what I say is when you surrender that happens naturally. You don't need to search for it. It will happen. I see it like a natural process. I found these books, I want to read them myself, I didn't read them but I'm pretty sure that it has very valuable information. They are mentioned on a Mc Kenna book, Enlightenment: The Damnedest Thing. These are the books: The writer is Satya Nadeem , maybe you know him. From Onions to Pearls By Satyam Nadeen From Seekers to Finders By Satyam Nadeen I want to read it too, I will buy them soon. This is the description of From Onions to Pearls: This is the true story of one man's spiritual awakening, without a guru and under severely restrictive, sometimes violent, physical, and intense emotional conditions. In March of 1992, Michael Clegg entered an overcrowded county jail near Jacksonville, Florida, convicted of the manufacture of an illegal drug called Ecstasy. He was held there for two years while awaiting sentencing. While in prison, he realized that a lifetime of spiritual searching had brought him no closer to the elusive state he was seeking, so he gave up trying. In surrender, he was overwhelmed with relief and bliss. The next several years were spent in a deepening process he calls the "deliverance," as layers of the preconditioned ego personality were peeled away to reveal the eternal Pearl of Consciousness. On August 15, 1996, Satyam Nadeen was released from a federal prison to reenter the world that Michael Clegg had left.

My thoughts are that i failed everyone, I left everyone, I loved everyone oh so very much, My logic and emotions became one, now I can't pull myself out. interesting as to the replies I've got because they make sense. How can I have an advantage if I don't exist? who am I? I've found the answer. I don't dream, I never dream, this past week I keep dreaming, I'm asking the same questions in the dream. (and getting responses)now I understand, I am nothing but a dream here in this world, the point (mind blowing as fuck) is to eternally dream. but a dream Is fake right? what i'm seeing and typing is fake right? you guys responding to me IS fake right? I get responses I can physically touch and feel and have emotional senses but its all fake right? It is nothing but constant pain here a reminder I died somehow, ( I hope i'm alive if there is an I heh) But I get it, In a dream you have no pain... all your friends are there you can't age and you can create. everlasting bliss am i wrong? or really ahead of myself. (perspective) my ego considers it self to be very intelligent to the point I brag about it, but it was never my knowledge and I would say that I always gave it to god. and theres a reason why which I will explain later. I have alot to share about true events (if you believe me) (I know its hard I can feel it as I type) that have happened to me Uhm ( i use to hate people that said uhm ) time has been rewound somehow. like literally. I read manga http://mangastream.com/ Says bleach 664 came out today, I've already seen/read it like no bs. it's been like that the past couple chapters. SOrry for the wall of text I just want it to end. I don't think any amount of money in the world would help me but i'll consider it. All I want is my family and what makes it the hardest I have a beautiful 3 year old son who I love beyond any thing. he was my savior, I make it hard on myself but it's the truth. I was looking up time loops and got really freaked out, i'm afraid of the unknown and what I know Couple questions @ Ayla if this isn't who I am, who am I? @ abrakamowse my thoughts have been a good part of my adult life, to motivate me comfort me, to hold me when I had no one else/ let go of them regardless? whats left

waking up at 7 am, drink water taking cold shower drinking green tea and stretching affirmations for 5 minutes and meditation for 20 minutes journaling breakfast Gym/walking (with preworkout coffee) Reading Watching Leos videos(at least one) and summarizing them and act upon them visualisation for 10 minutes learning spanish 20 minutes meditating again for 20 minutes affirmations again for 5 minutes The more I think about the universe and the mind and the more I exopse myself to various self help material I really think that I got it all. I got it all, all that it takes to rise and become a huge success. It's all inside of me. Not even in me, I am it. I am the pure awesomeness, the indestructible genius of the universe. I could easily make use of my infite power and become the king of the world...if I knew how. I know that I got it all,but I feel like I'm sleeping. I somehow cannot activate the power yet...I cannot go to action. I feel like this power is already in my hands, it's not even hidden or locked, it just is there, ready to be commanded. But I don't know how, because I'm still asleep. If I knew how to wake up and finally make use of this power that I have, everything would be different. I feel it inside of me so strong...so wild and raging, it want's to break out. Sometimes I feel the vibrations inside of me...in my body...or my soul. Sometimes this power is so vivid that I am afraid it will burst my body into pieces and just explode into freedom. Infinite power of the universe...of god, inside of me. And I am still asleep..what do I have to do to wake up and use the power? Tell me Universe, tell me stranger, what do I have to do? I'm a fucking blind snake crawling around the infinite power but I got no hands to grab it. If you want amazing results, you need to concentrate. Directed, accurate thinking towards ONE field that you wanna succeed at. No multi tasking here. One at a time...What do you desire the most? For me, there are 4 fields: Relationship: I love loving a woman and being loved, and I also love Sex. I really want a amazing girlfriend who I can share my adventure with and also to have the most valuable teammate a man can have. A woman can make or break a man. No one else but his woman can help a man achieve highs that he would never achieve by any other means. The mans best friend is really his woman. Health and Fitness: Really your body and your mind are the only two things you can bring on the table in any area of your life. And your body and mind are VERY VERY important to succeed in anything and to function on a high level. Without superior health you cannot do anything good for yourself or the world. Physical fitness and meditation and healthy foods are the most vital parts here. Money and Business: Without money, you cannot go far in live. In fact without money you have a hard time staying healthy, getting amazing experiences, living a good or at least decent life or even working on a good relationship. Money buys you freedom in our society. Money buys everything. You can live in any place of the world you want...but only if you have the money. Enlightenment: Is it really worth it? What will it bring? The end of all suffering? The mind blowing, ultimate truth? They say it's the highest achievement...even Leo is obsessed with it. Eternal peace, ultimate bliss? Or just a shallow realization...Who knows...it's the ultimate mystery. So there they are, the four major fields that I want to work on! All pretty damn important fields, and all need MASSIVE work in order to succeed. But I can and should concentrate on only one of them. One at a time...Which one is first to go? The most important? Oh I think I know what's most important for me...but what is it for you? If you cannot concentrate on one of them and master it then you will fail and getting them all. "As long as you long for the whole, you can't get a part of at all..."

It is as much "mine" as everything is me. I only said "mine" within the knowing that it's me who keeps going on with it. There were more people in the beginning asking it,but they quickly withdrew from Forum to enjoy their nothingness in bliss I of course got it from my Guru, My father, Moojiji who has completely undone the person and left the me open, spacious and free

You got hundreds of "mental walls", you gotta break through those barriers to free yourself.... All too often you find your life purpose by doing things that you really don't wanna do. For example, for years I wanted to be a writer... but I don't like to write very much, I don't have to much creativity, I don't have much imagination...I couldn't write a story to save my life... but recently I have been sitting there and break through my "writer's block" by doing writing exercises after exercises and it has opened my mind and writing skills tremendously. I am at a point right now, where I still don't like writing that much but when I am writing I get these tastes of heaven and become so full of passion and energy. I am here to tell you that you have "Life's Blocks", Sooo you have to blast right through them. If you are tough and persistent enough to do this you too can feel moments of of bliss that will gradually intensify and increase.

Pwahahahaha Actually, the bliss of enlightenment does feel like an orgasm (not necessarily physically). I call those moments "too much joy" - just imagine having a 3 days orgasm (or one week or permanent) ? Only this last phrase right here could give you enough motivation to "get into the enlightenment business" lol

To just grind? Is this truth? Seems like a hellish grind, is this plausible? The person in the video seems lie a dabbler, going from activity to activity? I have lost some passion for mathematics, should I just grind like hell, or follow my bliss? This is contrary to following your bliss, as the example given in the life purpose course. I want to be a master.

I remember two years ago in college after a chemistry exam. I was very tired and happy to have almost aced the test. I went to go sit down on the bench inside our student building (CUB) and I thought about all the mental anguish it took to achieve that goal. All the self-doubt and relentless studying, which was very painful mentally. The only kind of pain that affects me, I have strong physical pain tolerance, I do not take drugs for injuries. When I tried to think of the pain as bad, and the results as good. I felt how crazy it was to think either feelings as bad. How could they be? I got lost with this feeling of joy that the mental pain ( something I despise) was actually something beautiful. Mental pain as joy? I felt crazy, the thought was crazy and the feeling so good. How could it be, it just was. I started laughing uncontrollable when I realized that my thoughts were crazy, and if mine was everyone's was. I ran around campus in a state of bliss telling anyone who walked by that they were crazy. I was being completely honest and I thought their weird looks made them lovable idiots. When I finally stopped running I thought about all the lies we say, anything good or bad with thoughts was pure and utter craziness. Then I found a brick, I could not take my eyes off it. It was amazing, the brick was alive and pure. It unlike all the lovable idiots around me would never lie to me. I felt that, Soak in that crazy thought, I was at peace with crazy and it made perfect sense since it wasn't lying to me. I felt connected like none other, things got even more full when I realized it was all the brinks. All of them were honest friends, and their were so many. I wanted to take them with me, I couldn't but I wanted to fill myself with these bricks and all their wonderful glory. Something strange happened next and I am going to do my best to explain it. I realized these feeling of energy was coming from the grass as well. I ran over to the grass and realized this energy was everywhere. It was the most real feeling ive ever had, and I wanted to define it. I wanted to kill it and bottle it, so I went back to brick to *kill* it and realized almost instantly that that was just another crazy thoughts. it confirmed the crazy, which was hilarious. This brick was dead already yet life poured out of it without stopping. I couldn't kill it so I ran around tried to find where it WASN't. I ran around the chemistry building looking and feeling every hallway and room. It was everywhere, boundless..even radiating off of myself and other people. The definition of everywhere. I was not trying to be enlightened or happy, I just recognized the craziness of my thoughts. It was so peaceful and I could not stop laughing or telling people they were crazy. Lets chalk this off to a bit of after-exam mania, heres what I cant chalk off. That THING, in everything. I was not looking for it. The definition of not looking for it, i didn't know it existed. Yet I found it clear as day in everything, that energy in everything. I told myself how could it not be real? I found something I wasn't looking for. It felt like the only thing that wasn't crazy and that it would never lie to me. Very interesting mental state that I had for several weeks. If thats it Leo, I've been there. I didn't kill my ego either, thoughts were just crazy of any kind. I can excuse mania, but I can't excuse that thing that just appeared in every molecule around me. That brink was beaming with it, and more real than my crazy thoughts. What the hell is that thing that I cant kill or find parameters for, i felt it inside me and everywhere. I couldn't kill it or myself, and crazy enough that dead brink was more alive than i ever thought. I'll accept mania, but that thing was very real whatever it was.