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About Yonkon

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  1. The lack of empathy this man radiates disturbs me. "They had family who mourns them now... Well anyway let's jump right in lmao"
  2. Some good news! she got the test and even got the results already: everything is fine. We talked about our sexual past and experiences with other people, this was quite enlightening for me. Because we are now both tested on the most common Std's, we decided to continue without condoms! So this whole experience was quite bonding for us both. Thanks for your support everyone ❤️ @Farnaby As soon as I typed my post I knew someone would make a joke like that And yes, i did some soul searching the last few days and it is indeed connected with deeper fears. On the one hand, it is connected to the Madonna/Whore complex as @Waves suggested. On the other hand, it has to do with all the shame, guilt and anxiety I have in general about sexuality. So there is still a lot to unpack..
  3. @max duewel @Leo Gura @hamedsf She will make a test but it will take a few weeks till we get them. Would you guys still sleep with her in the meantime? My friends are saying it's not a big deal and a lot of women are doing it from time to time so it doesn't really matter.
  4. Hey there, Yesterday I talked with my girl and she said she slept with a guy without a using a condom before she met me. It was a friend and they knew each other. I have huge anxiety over catching Std's so this triggered me pretty hard. Right now I am depressed and worried, i don't want to sleep with her anymore to be honest. Am I overreacting? How to deal with this situation? (We are using always a condom by the way)
  5. Hey Folks, First things first: if this is somehow against the rules, sorry about that. Basically i entertained the idea to create a thread where people can find accountability partners. I imagine like this: you post a very short and concise description about yourself, your current goals and your expectations when it comes to working with an accountability partner. When somebody resonates with your post, you can connect via pm and voila. After that you can edit your post so that you will not get spammed. So here we go: I am looking for an accountability partner for weekly calls where we discuss our goals, our progress and our failures. We share our experiences freely and are transparent with each other. I am starting my first business as a music teacher, also i want to transition to a raw food diet and want to start with calisthenics. In the long term i want to become a world class music producer. (Also bonus points if you can talk german) So if you are interested and we share similarities, hit me up.
  6. Or is it the requirement for all different games? I mean can god play with itself without self deception? What games are there other than self deception?
  7. Hey there, I'm meditating for many years now and always struggled with it. There were some breakthroughs but most of the time it felt forced and inefficient. Through contemplation some insights came up that helped me tremendously and now meditation is something pleasant that I look forward too. The biggest key for me was to stop being ideological about the techniques. Explicitly that means: I am allowing myself to move when I want to move. I don't have to sit still, but I can if it feels right. I don't have to sit cross legged, I can sit on a chair, lay down or stand. Also I can change positions during a session when my body gets stiff, this allows me to meditate longer. Also, I allow myself to switch to techniques during a session. That means i start with breathing and after some minutes I switch to labeling for example or to kriya. This is always different and i try to follow my intuition. Basically, meditation more and more becomes like play for me. I don't force myself to stay in line with the teachings, although I appreciate them and use them as guidance. Lastly i just want to say that the cold hard disciplined way also has value and can be a great way to balance the more experimental and loose approaching. Much love
  8. What Leo showed me is that even highly developed beings can have shitty and limited perspectives in music.
  9. @LittleYoga this is the right book, i bought it and it changed my life. I don't know about the audio programms but the book is well structured and clear.
  10. Currently i am going with number 2, works gerat for me. What does your intuition say?
  11. Are there any good stage blue role models to study? I want to integrate blue but i can't find good books, courses and youtube channels with healthy stage blue content.
  12. @JosephKnecht Dude this is great, thank you! Fits perfectly.
  13. Hey there, I finally have a concrete goal in life but I am not sure how to formulate it in the right way. My main problem is that I have a financial goal and a life purpose: "I create a monthly passive income of 10k dollars by producing groundbreaking music." Now I feel I should pick only one of the 2 goals, mainly the second one so that my mind can focus on it... Will it work with both or will it scattter my brain?
  14. @egoeimai @Roy First I broke up because I didn't want a long distance relationship, but then I decided to give it a try 1 hour later. (now we live closer and its not a long distance relationship anymore) Then she broke uo because she couldn't trust me because I wanted to spend the day alone. After that she explained to me she has something like borderline, which makes her push me away when she gets scared. Then she broke up some weeks after because I was going out with friends and didn't reply for 8 hours. She is reflected and after those incidents she comes back and takes responsibility for her over the top actions and accusations.. She is quite clever and spiritual. I am really confused.