TimStr

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About TimStr

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  • Birthday 06/18/1994

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    Stuttgart, Germany
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  1. I don't know how egotistical I am compared relative to other people. Probably less than the average person, probably not. I leave that for others to judge. What I wanted to say is, that its important to recognize and accept your own egotism instead of denying it. Accepance of what is denied is key to changing it.
  2. @F A B Let's get some awareness in the situation you experienced. The thing, that is probaply hurtung you the most is, that you know, that your friend is totally right. You could have given a few bucks to that bum. That's a fact. And you didn't. That's also a fact. Accept that! That's by the way, how I would like myself to react in your situation. Just admitting the facts and experience how my emotions and thoughts react. If your friend says: "you live in a wealthy family, you could have given something to him", say "Yes, you're right. I could have. But I didn't." My point is not to rub salt into the wound, but to point out the deeper issue: What that your friend pointed out, is that you are deeply egotistical. I know, because I am deeply egotistical, too. Deep down inside, I think that I deserve my money more than any random homeless bum. And I secretly hate homeless people for revealing this part of my egotism to me. Have you ever noticed, that when a homeless person approaches strangers and asks for money, almost nobody is able to look into that homeless' persons eyes. That's because it hurts the ego to be exposed. Poor people must feel so lonely... If you actually looked in those persons eyes for a few seconds and allow yourself to see and feel his suffering, you couldn't help to be compassionate. Just test this out yourself, the next time you are approached for money just look that person straight in the eyes and observe his and your own reaction. Then say yes or no and observe again. By the way, your friend, that pointed out your egotism is in no way soperior to you. His ego just needs that reassurance that it get's by pointing you out. If you want you can share to him openly, how his behaviour made you feel and see, how he reacts. This may break down some of the boundaries that the situation created between you two.
  3. @OnceMore If you want a quick and dirty fix: do a 10 day vipassana retreat After that retreat, commit yourself to a 90d no multitasking challang for integration. (Depending on how you set this up, you may allow for some entertainment (so and so many h per day / per week...), or at least some form of relaxation, that fills the place, that entertainment abstinence leaves.) This will be extremely hard, but the 10 day retreat should ease with the withdrawl symptoms a bit. Be especially mindful of how distraction and entertainment cravings slowly creep back into your life. Also spend more time of your day distraction free - just you yourself by yourself - and build a rock solid meditation routine (do nothing, vipassana, or labeling). Move more towards lifestyle minimalism. Also think about what aspects of yourself you want to be distracted of. Ego creates distraction because it can't face truth. Its crucial to find out what parts your ego consists of to get some initial leverage. This boils down to your greatest fears. Do you hate feeling alone? Do you hate feeling lazy because you are afraid of failure? Do you hate feeling bored, because it leaves you feeling useless? What do you run away from, so that you end up in a place of entertainment seeking?
  4. @Shakazulu I think, there are two types of synesthesia: The first one is purely methaphorical. Talking about melodies and harmonies as having a certain colour to discribe the feeling that one associates with them. I think, this is somewhat common among musicians to talk about music like that. The second one is the experiential obliteration of the difference between sound of color, so that one sees a sound as a certain shade or colour. I have never experienced this personally, but I heard, that this can be achieved by using certain psychedelics like the 2C-x family of phenetylamines. https://psychonautwiki.org/wiki/Synaesthesia I would love to experience this some time. Having your physical senses blend together must be one of the greatest mindfucks possible.
  5. @Shakazulu When it comes to mastery, you want to be way more serious about your practice, than with anything else. I think, being very serious is at the core of what qualifies an activity as a practice. Think of it like this, if you want to master sushi making, just making sushi for 4h a day wouldn't be considered real practice. A sushi apprentice usually spends at least 1 year just practicing to wash and boil the rice. Nothing else. Then another year of learning how to sharpen the knives, then another year of preparing and cutting all the ingrdients. It might take him over 3 years, before he will assemble his first sushi. The trick is to break your practice down as much as possible. If you really want to master something, it is very important, that you give yourself the space and time to investigate every little minutia of your craft. Get into the specifics and grind it out. So in a sense your 2h +1h + 1h approach seems like a great start, but really push your to get into those details. Don't just spend 2h with general songwriting, but maybe spend 2h experimenting how changing one single chord from major to minor affects the energy and tension in the first part of the chorus of your song. Or spend 2h just messing and experimenting with the speed of a single part of your song. You get the point. Take nothing for granted, experiment with everything and really grind out the details. I am mastering playing the drums and sometimes I practice a single rhythm at 30bpm for over 30min (not to brag), without stopping or changing, focusing on absolute consistency and accuracy. My point is: practice is about pushing the limits of your skill and your ability to concentrate. Pushing your limits is the only way, you will get better. If your practice feels easy, your not really practicing. A word on theory: learning the theory is also about learning to apply the theory as effortlessly as possible. You want to be able to not have to think about the theory while you're using is. This is especially important for domains like art and music that are more right brain emotional type of activities. Music, that is based totally on the application of music theory sounds like theory. It won't be moving people emotionally. Yet knowing the theory and being able to apply it is important. And what's even more important is to know, when you should forget about the theory.
  6. Hey guys, procrastination is a huge obstacle in my life. I'm sure I am not the only one here. I spent some time today thinking about the issue and I think, I discovered the root cause of my problem: I think I am lazy! Not all the time of cause. I have productive days and I feel great about myself. But after a few of those, my addictions and homeostasis kick in and bring me back to a place of unfocused distraction and procrastination on what I wanted to accomplish. I then hate myself for being unproductive and lazy. I guess, I identified being lazy as a "bad" part of my personality and that belief generates a self-fulfilling profecy for me. Basically, being lazy is a part of my self-image, that I hate, but since its part of my self image, my self creates the behaviour, that reinforces that self image. In the past, I tried just to brute force myself out it by setting goals, having todo lists, accountability systems and whatnot. But it seems, that this didn't adress the root issue. In fact, I think, that this may have made the problem a lot worse. What can I do? Do you think, that affirmations and vizualizations may help here to change my self-image? I want to solve that problem once and for all and love to hear your tips and suggestions.
  7. "Welcome to the post-truth world. You know it's not real. But you accept it as normal." -- Adam Curtis Hey guys, I want to share some documentaries with you, because I think they are essential to understand the world, we live in. I like Adam Curtis' films, because they bring together lots of detailed information from mass psychology, history, politics, economy, technology... to draw an extremely high level picture of how the notion of truth looks like in todays society. (Not Absolute Truth though, but relative truth. But I think understanding the mechanims of relative truth is crucial to act in this world.) I want to especially recommend HyperNormalization and The Century of The Self. These are a must-see for everyone interested in systems thinking, politics, history and understanding the collective ego. I know, a 2.5 to 4 hour watch is a big commitment, but these films literally have the power to shatter your paradigm so much, that you arrive at a place, where the only possible modus oparandi of your thinking is that of spiral dynamics stage yellow. So prepare for a test in open mindedness (it was one for me ).
  8. @stevegan928 Research permaculture http://inhabitfilm.com/
  9. I suppose, a martial art that provides you with the whole spiritual background, that it is based upon might be most enjoyable for you. I find, that most martial arts got out of touch with that and developed into a set of combat techniques, especially in the west. But the philosophy virtually all eastern martial arts is literally bulit upon nondual traditions, such as daoism or zen. The ones that tend to most "intact" in that sense are aikido, kendo and shaolin kung fu. You could also try Cheng Hsin, the martial art, that was developed by Peter Ralston, if that's avaliable in your area
  10. Thanks for sharing!! Can anyone offer some background on the movements and hand gestures, he is making?
  11. @SuperLuigi I agree with @Dragallur. If you keep track of what you eat, there shouldn't be any health problems. In fact you should be way healthier on a vegan diet. Get into the work of Michael Greger, he has a lot of videos, that adress specific issues, associated to diet. And I can recommend his book "How Not to die": www.nutritionfacts.org
  12. @h inandout Music! Because it's non symbolic!
  13. I think suffering is one of the forces, that pushes us towards growth. But I think there are other forces, like compassion and pure joy, that can do so as well. Compassion is the desire for the end of suffering, so it's sort of the other side of the coin. I think the one thing, that keeps you from making great art is complacency and avoiding suffering. If your art is not meaningful enough to you that you would go through hell for it, it's probably not very meaningful to others. But I wouldn't assume that torturing ourselves automatically produces great art.
  14. Some general advice: Fist, get your own shit back together, THEN help out others. Don't beat yourself up! The path is long and you will stumble a lot. Growth actually happens by failing a lot! So don't worry about that. Every time you fail an feel like shit, say to yourself: "This is only going to make me stronger!" Then get back up on your feet and start walking again. Some specific advice: Make a clear decision and stick to it! Your ex is changing her mind a lot because she is confused and doesn't know, what she wants. And actually: You don't know what you want either! So make up your mind and then tell her. Don't justify or explain yourself, just tell her! Then go do it and stick to it! (Hint: Anticipate, that this is going to be very hard.) Go watch Leos video about self acceptance! Watch it at least once a week for the next two months. This will completely change you! Send it to your ex so she can also go watch it. Give her a sense of deep acceptance and space. Yes she hurt you a lot and you want her to stop. And yes you probably can't bear to see her suffering any more and you want her to change and grow for her own sake. But if you want a person to grow, the most important thing they need is space! One of the most beautiful definitions of true love I ever heard was: creating a space to grow. She should not feel obligated to you in any way!
  15. Enlightenment has to be a strange loop. It can only exist as a strange loop. There is this description in zen of enlightenment being a gateless gate. You walk through the gate and realize, that there was no gate to walk through in the first place. On my last AL-LAD trip I was mindfucked by this paradox of enlightenment being a "state" that can be reached vs advita nonduality tells us that we allready are enlightened and can't get any closer to it. The psychedelic confronted my mind with the question of how it's possible to reach a "state" that I am allready in. What I now know, after watching your new video, @Leo Gura , that I became conscious of the strange-loopieness of the concept of enlightenment. There is this description of the substance of enlightenment by Peter Ralston that captures this, that rings very true with me. The insight here is, that there is no difference between enlightenment and me. That's were the metaphor of the cat unraveling the yarn unraveling the cat comes in. I am enlightenment, I just have to realize what I am.