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About nightrider1435

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  • Birthday 10/02/1995

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    Dallas, Texas
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  1. It's alot for the ego to take in when you first awaken. I remember walking around in absolute shock of what I was seeing, I essentially went from duality to non duality over night after a mushroom trip. There is bliss but then comes the laundry so watch out for that. Once you open up the rabbit hole this is when you truly start walking the path.
  2. @khalifa Take some 5-htp, it could help the body and mind to relax.
  3. @Identity I think that would be full enlightenment, you couldn't be here anymore if that was the case.
  4. The ego will pull all sorts of tricks in an attempt to delude you back into illusion. You saw god, you are god, it's a matter now on how deep you want to take it. The one who says this is to much and I can't live with this is not even real!! Lol
  5. You can't go back once you reach this point. The mind can try to cover it up but once the illusion is exposed you can't return to a lie.
  6. Eat heavy foods, go out in nature, take a break from any spiritual practice that you might be doing. You need to direct the energy somewhere it can be used. It's a life force energy, it wants to experience itself through you. Go hit the gym and break a sweat, physical exercise can be the best for calming this energy down. It might feel overwhelming because you're not doing anything with it other than letting it sit there.
  7. @Conrad You know nothing about this person, telling someone to just go for it can be very dangerous advice.
  8. @Justincredible76 If you haven't experienced an ego death breakthrough yet then I wouldn't consider 5meo, you are no where near that ballpark. You just run the risk of overwhelming your psyche if your're not ready, and coming out of the experience completely traumatized.
  9. My problem with cannibis is it can give me good insights but I can never seem to bring it back down to the sober mind.
  10. @Chi_ Before I smoked it felt like I still had control of the trip and I could steer it where I wanted to, but after smoking it was like the steering wheel gets ripped away, and my mind completely lost it. But you are right, I wasnt in the best state of mind before starting this trip.
  11. @Nahm It most certainly did help. I think I've been tripping to much lately, I was getting cocky so the shrooms had to teach me a lesson. My intuition was hinting to not trip but I did it anyways. I'm still feeling a bit uneasy but I know I'll recover more from this as time goes on. I'm just feeling more detached from my reality more than I would like. Even right now as I type this my mind knows it isn't real, and it doesn't like that.
  12. @SoonHei The thing that was making me the most uneasy was the inner voice, it was going absolutely nuts. Everything went from blissful to wow, my mind is starting to freak me out, I just want this to end. It truly is challenging to remind yourself that you took a drug and that this experience will end when your caught up in it. When your in that state time isn't linear anymore. I was just repeating to myself that everything was ok and that I am safe.
  13. @Consilience I defiantly smoked more than I should. It just completely blindsided me, all that bliss came crashing down and all of sudden I was having this dark experience.
  14. So I tripped last night on 2g of shrooms and overall it was good. I was blissed out and seeing myself as everything. Lots of laughing... because I was conscious that it was just me talking to myself my entire life. I figured my peak was over and I was coming down, so I decided it would be a good idea to smoke the devils lettuce. Well... that's when the trip took an unexpected turn. It felt like I was going into a peak again, but in a more twisted way. I was concentrating on an object in my room, and it triggered me to go into a ego death. It happened so fast and very spontaneous. All of a sudden my heart rate skyrocketed, this sense of intense fear washed over my entire body. I really triggered my ego last night to a new degree, this was a type of fear that I had never felt before. My inner voice started to become really dark. I was sitting on my bed with my hands death gripping my mattress and with a snarl on my face, almost like a wild animal. I wasn't in control of my body at this point, and it felt like I had this angry entity inside of me. I was in such a detached state of being that it literally felt like my own mind attacked me. My mind felt like this hissing snake in the corner of a room. I was becoming to one with everything, to the point that it felt like my experience was dissolving into this black hole. My 23 year old male ego wasn't having it, the ego was in a full panic trying to keep itself constructed. This was out of my control, I couldn't get myself to surrender to this. The best way I can think of describing this is it felt like my experience was crystallizing together. Imagine a shattered window that's still intact becoming a perfect window again. I ended up just trying to distract myself the best I could by listing to some music so I could just ride it out. What would had happened if I surrendered and let it play out? Shit, I don't know. That was a very.... humbling experience, my ass got handed to me. It's hard to put into words how intense this really was though. I will never smoke weed during a psychedelic experience ever again, because everything was fine up until that point. I've read similar reports on reddit, weed tends to turn trips dark and twisted. Be careful about mixing anything with a psychedelic, you never know what could happen. This was my first bad experience with a psychedelic out of about 12 trips now.
  15. @Paul92 Perhaps you should just take a break from spirituality and keep focusing on carefree living and your hobbies, like you said. Sometimes being to "woke" and seeing yourself as everything isn't a pleasant thing. It's ok to live in duality.